Supply and Demand Pt. 01

There's nothing better than being part of a close-knit friend group; to feel truly wanted, respected and appreciated for what you bring to a conversation. You know, the kind of crowd where you're all up in each other's business and you know everyone is equally invested. The kind of rabble where you know you can depend on each and every one to dig you out of a hole or offer you a shoulder to cry on. The kind of friends you know would never betray you and always have your back.

That's how it's been amongst my peers for the past decade. We've always hung out together and supported each other through the various situations that arose in our lives. School, college, love and careers, we rejoiced and cried together throughout each milestone. Ruth had been my best friend for as far back as I could remember, even bagging me a job in the same hotel she worked at, and through her, I'd met Heidi and her boyfriend Roger. The four of us had formed a bond and we regularly met up for get-togethers and socials. We'd even taken a couple of trips away for the weekend. Our group was tight and extremely loyal.

Ruth had occasionally brought a new boyfriend into the group, though, her relationships were often short and erratic, her pursuit of her career goals seeming to take priority over any budding romance. My position in the hotel had only been a result of her moving up the ladder, which I was extremely happy for her of course. Meanwhile, I had largely followed a solo path through life, often acting as a gooseberry to the two couples on the occasions that Ruth did bring a new fella along. It could be awkward at times, and I'd often have to navigate prying enquiries into my love life, but overall, they were good about including me in things. Besides, I wasn't really interested in any of that kind of thing, and I was quite comfortable operating as a third wheel, or at times, a fifth wheel. I even joined Heidi and Roger for dinner on a number of occasions, despite riding solo myself. It never seemed to cause any issues, even when I'd playfully stick my fingers in my mouth and imitate vomiting; the way they made-out in public was certainly deserving of such a response! They'd laugh along with me and we all seemed comfortable with my solitary path through life.

I was the designated gooseberry, and damn proud of it, until five years ago, when I'd met Hunter. Suddenly, I wasn't the sore thumb amongst our friend group anymore. After a couple of weeks of dating, I'd steered him into our friend group; all of them being suitably impressed by the stud that such a quiet, homely girl had managed to bag. Hunter and Roger were soon thick as thieves, and the girls really took to my new fella. Of course, it helped that Hunter was such a good catch. Tall, handsome, and successful in his career; sometimes I surprised myself that we were actually a couple. I was short and considered more like a girl next door, rather than some toned bombshell or anything. I'd even been described as a bit bookish or nerdy, with my frizzy hair and glasses. However, Hunter had never seemed bothered by any of that, and had professed from the start that it was my bubbly personality and good nature that had attracted him. He'd had his fair share of bimbos, so he'd said, and now he wanted a real girl to settle down with. I wasn't sure whether that was a compliment or an insult, but in his company, I finally felt like I was desired and accomplished. With each passing day, I only seemed to blossom further, though, I always had the worry that I wasn't good enough for him in the back of my mind.

However, all good things come to an end, and though my time with Hunter had been the happiest of my life, unfortunately, our relationship had recently hit an abrupt brick wall. The break-up had been so unexpected that I was pretty much baffled when he had moved out. I mean, we went through the same kind of problems that every other couple did; the occasional fights and a breakdown in communication. I could admit that I was often self-conscious and worried that I wasn't good enough for him, but he had always been reassuring and responsive. However, towards the end, he hadn't been as affectionate with me and sex had pretty much dried up, but that was understandable. We weren't teenagers and his work had been taking up a lot of his time. I figured it was something that we had to work through together, but apparently Hunter didn't have the energy and had brought things to an end.

Obviously, I was devastated, and the past few weeks had been spent wallowing in self-pity, often spending entire days in my pyjamas while I binged on ice cream and watched TV show marathons. The unceremonious way that he'd left only seemed to confirm the very real insecurities I'd harboured throughout our relationship: I wasn't good enough for him. Despite his protests of the opposite, eventually he'd accepted it too.

Through my hurt, I'd scour social media looking for a means of distraction, though often finding myself visiting Hunter's pages and reminiscing about the times we had shared together. Thankfully, my usual friend group had been there for me, particularly Ruth, the one girl I could always depend on in life. She'd come over on a few evenings and we'd watched a movie together with a bottle of wine while she bitched about the recent loser she had gone on a date with. Instead of sulking, my nights would be filled with laughter at Ruth's shenanigans. It helped me forget about Hunter and reawakened that old solo role I used to have in our group. Once more, I became the strong, independent woman all over again, well, for appearances anyway. The real truth I buried deep inside me, that I had never been good enough for Hunter anyway, and his leaving me was inevitable. Despite Ruth and Heidi's reassurances that I was too good for him, that doubt firmly remained.

The only problem was a fractured split concerning Roger. On a few occasions when our usual group had met up, Roger had been decidedly absent, apparently off somewhere with Hunter. Heidi and Ruth found this rather annoying, whereas I was pretty aloof to the whole thing; a most trivial matter in the grand scheme of things. Yes, it kind of sucked that Roger was apparently siding with Hunter, considering I'd known him longer, but perhaps they had a whole bro-comradery thing going on and I wasn't about to demand they end their friendship just because my relationship had fallen apart. I was the one that had brought Hunter into the group, after all, and it was unfair to judge Roger for his response. He could be friends with Hunter all he liked, it was just a bit of a downer that I was seeing him less a result.

So, it was a pleasant surprise when Ruth snuck up on me at work one day following the break up. "You coming to Heidi's this weekend? We're having a little get together. All the gang are in."

I adjusted my glasses and turned from the booking monitor of the reception counter. "Sounds fun. Any special occasion?" This was the first real meeting of this sort since Hunter had ditched me. There had been a couple of lunches with just us girls, which I had kind of sulked through, but none of the party-style get togethers that we used to enjoy. Roger was always off doing something with Hunter, so I was ready to jump at the opportunity for the four of us to be back together.

"The special occasion of getting drunk." She sniggered. "You've never needed an excuse for that before, right?"

"You know me too well."

We both shared a mutual chuckle, before Ruth leant over and squeezed my shoulder. "There's just one thing. I know Roger has invited Hunter." Her expression braced itself for my response. "Heidi tried to talk him out of it, but he insisted since they're friends."

"Oh." I scratched my chin. "Well, that's awkward." Apparently the 'usual gang' included Hunter. I guess I only had myself to blame for that.

"Yeah, I even had a word with him. He was quite insensitive about it actually. He said it's been a month and you two need to figure things out."

"He's got a point I suppose."

"Have you two spoken since the break up?"

"Not at all."

"Yeah, awkward." She looked away momentarily. "I mean, I get it, if you don't feel comfortable. I'd rather he wasn't there, but it's Roger's place as much as Heidi's."

I batted her away with my hand. "It's fine, I swear. I'm over it, honestly. It's a free country, and he's Roger's friend now, so I get it." However, inwardly I was fuming. The break-up had been far from amicable and had pretty much come from nowhere as far as I was concerned. We'd been together for five years, and were even talking about marriage. For the past year, Hunter's affection gradually dried up and then for the past few months he became a lot more irritable. That cumulated in last month's fiasco, where he broke it off with me under the guise of 'he had fallen out of love with me'. I wasn't even given the opportunity to get a better explanation as he moved out the next day and had ghosted all of my attempts to reach out. It was both baffling and infuriating. I mean, how could he so callously throw away everything that we had? How do you just fall out of love with someone?

However, perhaps this party was the perfect opportunity for me to get some answers. He'd been ignoring all attempts to reach out from me; both calls and messages remaining unanswered. Maybe I could get him alone, and over some drinks, rekindle the romance that had evidently deserted us. I knew my insecurities played a big part in our problems, but if I could get over that little issue, then perhaps I could be the woman he deserved. Surely, he would realise that I was the one for him, especially once I dressed up all sexy and used my powers of seduction, along with my usual bubbly personality. That whole thing was completely alien too me, and I always felt uncomfortable flaunted myself in such a way, but with Hunter as the prize, I'd have to go out on a limb. It had been somewhat stilted after his recent behaviour, but that kind and fun girl was still hiding away inside me. I mean, I was a pretty average girl in terms of look, but I was capable of looking moderately attractive when I put the effort in.

"Good." Ruth's lips shivered as if she was about to say something else, before she considered the atmosphere and swallowed it down.

"What is it?"

"It's just, well..."

"Come on, spit it out."

Her hand gently squeezed my shoulder again, as if bracing me for the evident bombshell about to be dropped. "It's just...apparently he's bringing his new...girlfriend."

There was silence while my brain did a mental circuit break: Hunter already had a girlfriend? How was that even possible? "Already?" We had only been broken up a month, and that was after a five-year relationship together! This is not what I wanted at all. He was the one that had broken it off with me, despite my protestations. Had he already had someone lined up to replace me? Was that the real reason I'd been kicked to the side? "He really has a girlfriend, already?"

"I know...I know." Ruth was unable to hold eye contact. "Maybe it's a rebound thing."

Even if it was a rebound: how could he have replaced me already? We were both still so young and our relationship had taken up such a huge part of our lives. I was still struggling with the heartbreak of it all. Simply seeing Hunter in person again was going to be an ordeal, as I knew those old emotions would re-emerge and torment me. He was the love of my life and I was more than willing to work to keep everything we had together. Yet, he was going to be there with someone else? The past month for me had been a struggle, but apparently, Hunter was moving on as if nothing had happened between us. As if he hadn't broken my heart and thrown everything away.

Suddenly, my thoughts turned to this new girlfriend. Who the hell was she? Why did Hunter think she could replace me? Was she better? Was she more attractive than I was? Was that why he had fallen out of love with me? I didn't turn him on! It was obvious. Every time I had been worried that I wasn't good enough for him, he'd played it off like I was crazy. Maybe I'd been right all along. "What's she like? Is she prettier than me?"

"What?" Ruth's forehead wrinkled. "I've no idea. I haven't even met her."

My forehead too creased. Why the hell was I asking that? It's not like it mattered anyway. "I don't know why I said that." Still, my thoughts lingered to this unseen woman who had taken my place. Was she a blonde or a brunette? Were her boobs bigger than mine? Was her ass peachier? Hunter loved my ass, as he'd said he wasn't into girls without some booty, but maybe this girl's butt was better than mine? Maybe she had smoother skin, and the natural, seductive eyes that I'd always lacked behind my glasses? There was so much doubt building in me, doubt of my self-worth. I mean, if he had thrown me away and replaced me so easily; was this girl more of a catch than I was? How was that even possible? I'd believed all of the waffle he'd fed me: I was the girl he wanted to settle down with. I'd figured we were going to be together forever. That wasn't some crazy idea on my part, because that's exactly what he'd told me whenever I was a bit self-conscious. We were the perfect couple, he'd said, but now, I was kicked to the kerb and this new girl had taken my place. All in the space of a bloody month! I had barely been able to cope with the mental fatigue, yet, here he was, shovelling a load more on me.

"I can blow them off. We can just hang out together. It's no biggie if you don't want to go. I totally get it." Ruth was nodding sympathetically by this point. "Ella, there's no expectation here. You have nothing to prove to anyone."

A tear was already starting to seep from the corner of my eye, which I slyly wiped away with my sleeve. However, I couldn't help sniffling. "It's fine. I'm a big girl." Despite knowing in my heart that it was better I don't attend, for my own well-being more than anything, I had to see who this girl was. Maybe she wasn't as great as I was bigging her up to be. I could go all out and show Hunter what he had been missing. I could prove to him that I was the real catch, and he'd already had everything he needed. This replacement, whoever she may be, was a mere imposter amongst the obvious love our relationship had harboured. Perhaps she was a tempting floozy that had lured his eye away, and I needed to just remind him of everything we had and shared together. Five years was a lot to throw away, and Hunter was a total idiot for not realising that and jeopardising our future over a meaningless fling. He was just confused, it was obvious. This was a temporary blip and I had to put the effort in to get my man back. He'd appreciate that, wouldn't he? That's what this all was about! He needed to see how much I wanted him.

I took a deep breath and tried to steer my thoughts in a more positive direction. I needed to forget about whoever this random girl was. Get Hunter back, that was the mission, and hiding away wasn't going to achieve that. I had to take a risk, and however much it scared me, I had to put myself out there and take what I wanted. "I can handle it."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. Maybe this is the kick up the butt I needed. It's about time I moved on too." Of course, I had no intention of moving on, but revealing my true intentions would probably lead to Ruth trying to talk me out of going. I was going to be at that party, and Hunter was going to be mine once more.

Ruth smiled. "It is."

"I'll see you at the party."

Once Ruth had left my side, I immediately turned to social media for some snooping. I'd been avoiding Hunter's accounts more recently, since those early days of rampant stalking after the shock of being ditched. His photos were now too painful a reminder of what we had lost. I was still apprehensive about going for a lurk, since I needed to be level-headed and focused, not a bawling, juddering weep. I was a mixture of resentment and longing, partly because I still felt like the explanation he had given me was lacking. I knew it would have been better for me to skip the party and just focus my energies elsewhere; perhaps moving on was the right thing to do. However, I simply couldn't shake the curiosity of this new girl and the possibility that I'd been ditched in favour of her. Did she look similar to me? Was Hunter simply dating her on a rebound, trying to get over the obvious devastation that the end of our relationship had induced? Or, had he truly moved on after a month? One final possibility I found truly daunting...had this girl been around much longer? I didn't even want to think about that.

Yet, as I perused his account, I groaned with frustration, as he hadn't posted a single photo or update since we had parted ways. The last photo on his profile was one of him on a hike, from a few days before our big break up; his strong legs and biceps clearly visible in his tight-fitting shirt. As I eye-fucked him through the screen, I considered that maybe I really had been very lucky for those five years, hadn't I? Perhaps I should just accept I was extremely fortunate to have dated Hunter in the first place and our uncoupling was simply the natural progression. I did however frown at the fact he had deleted every trace of me. All of the photos of us hugging and kissing throughout our relationship were evidently absent; vanquished to the depth of the internet void. Five years of happiness, all to be discarded via a few clicks.

After spending the rest of the week constantly checking Hunter's profiles to see if any trace of this mystery girl had been shared, eventually, the night of the party arrived. I teetered on backing out, terrified of seeing him again and finding out that he was dating someone much better looking than I was. Still, I managed to gear myself up with a couple of pre-drinks and positive re-enforcement: I was an honest girl and a good catch. I hadn't done anything wrong and I had nothing to feel bad about. So, I spent over an hour dolling myself up in the dress I knew that Hunter liked the most. Beneath the shimmering, red folds I wore my laciest, black underwear, you know, just in case Hunter realised what he was missing. I wasn't the slimmest of girls, but Hunter had always gotten so excited over my curvy physique. Perhaps this whole girlfriend thing had been a misunderstanding, or maybe it was even a ruse cooked up by Hunter as a means to ensure I attended. Maybe he was even regretting breaking up with me, but was too embarrassed to reach out after his terrible behaviour.

I'd had my hair restyled the previous day, and paid careful attention to my face, making sure my makeup, and in particular, my lipstick, were both flawless and alluring. I'd opted for an enticing maroon which really excelled the plump, juiciness of my lips. Hunter had always had a weakness for my kisses, and we'd spent countless hours curled up on the sofa amidst prolonged make-out sessions during the infancy of our relationship. Each time our lips touched I'd have to pinch myself that I wasn't dreaming, that I was actually wrapped in the arms of such a stud. To complete the look, I drew wings onto my eyes and gave them the appropriate mascara-induced thickness, just the way I knew he loved. As a finality, I ditched my usual glasses and slipped in a pair of tinted contact lenses: the result a riveting sky blue. Was I going to be on the cover of a fashion magazine? No, but I knew I was good enough to get my man back.

While twisting and posing in the mirror, puckering my lips and blowing imaginary kisses, I was confident that Hunter would see sense as soon as he laid eyes on me. With the alcohol flowing, I could see in my reflection that I was a goddamned catch, even if I wasn't a runway model, and he had been an idiot to break it off with me. However, my lips sagged as I noted his toothbrush still standing there beneath the mirror. He'd been in such a rush to leave our apartment after the break-up that he'd left various possessions in his wake. I hadn't gotten around to getting rid, even though they were a painful reminder of what we'd had. Part of me still held onto the hope that he was going to come back, and it felt wrong to throw his things away. The past month hadn't been easy covering the rent on my own, but he was going to come back, wasn't he? I mean, he'd left his toothbrush!