by LordLoxley
What a fucking story, my man! Loved it from beginning to end! Any chance their adventure will continue??
I plan on writing Esmerelda's story soon. I have some other story ideas, so I'm not sure that will be the next thing I write. I really appreciate the feedback, it does indeed influence what I write next.
This would have been a 5 star story, except it didn't need the epilogue. It just wasn't necessary.
hablo espanol. Pero es mi lengua segundo. Necesito mejorarme.
I didn't like the epilogue. The romance was perfect, and the epilogue killed it.
What 's wrong with you? I start reading your stories and I can't stop laughing !
You are an excellent writer, the sex scenes are good (guys love them) but it's your excellent unconventional humour that make your stories so special. (even your own literary name has a tongue-in-cheeck quality to it)
Speaking of sex scenes, most love stories on Literotica sound like this : I (young girl) think of myself as average (see how modest I am?) even though my friends describe me as gorgeous with a petite 5"2 curvy body. Then in comes 6"3 stunning male heatthrob who ends up worshipping me and putting the whole world at my feet.
But the beginning of your love story is more believable and real : "Herman was instantly mesmerized by the dusky little goddess. Whereas the 'goddess' thought : What the hell is wrong with this awkward, overweight guy? She initially thought that maybe he was special needs but then she couldn't believe the old perv. Gawking at her carnival boobs with his stained pink t-shirt stretched over his big belly."
So freaking funny ! And I disagree with some commentators, I think that the Epilogue is great and in perfect tune with the beginning lol.
Please, please keep'em coming !
Gosh, when you read the story for the 2nd time it starts getting better and better !
As a reader, you then start developing a sneaking suspicion that the author is trying to make fun of everyone, characters, genre and readers included, under the disguise of a love story!
I mean, when you think of it, the 2 protagonists end up having lewd sex in a toilet and in public, and they don't even know their first names. And yet they talk about romance, love and their soul-mate .
The 2 protagonists also talk about being wounded souls and healing each other, but what's to heal ? Even though you're initially thrown off by their crumbled relationships, you figure out later on that their inferiority complexes revolve around his huge instrument and her luscious body (things that are typically described as assets by writer of erotica).
I totally bought it on my first reading and I see that other readers did as well (see disappointed comments re epilogue etc).
LordLoxley, you're officially my hero !
You are correct. And kudos for being in on the joke. This story is intended to be a cartoon. I'm fascinated by how disgusting things can be made sexy and sexy things made disgusting. All within the construct of our strange mammalian brains!
I have two stories in the works right now that also cover some of that ground. The sequel to this story, and another called "Dr. Phermone." This is a busy time of year for me, but I will have them out in the next few months.
Your kind words are actually an incentive to get them done asap. Thanks!
this was incredibly everything. hot, funny, romantic.
fun! thanks a lot and i can't wait for more.
This story is excellent , has all ingredients , perfectly mixed , this is what literotica is all about . Congrats