All Comments on 'Talla's Temple Ch. 03'

I like your story so far. The writing is decent and I wonder about those body upgrades. It almost sounds like there is no natural maturing for the females in your world? But I also see some storyline errors in this chapter... How can you call the Initiation ritual a best kept secret for hundreds of years when many boys and men know and certainly talk about it? Surely with the gossip all the town, including certain girls, would know about those ways of the temple.

I agree with the previous comment. Exciting, but not thought through.

The behaviour of teenagers in this world is very odd. I'm flattered you're interested enough to notice.

I'm finding enough mystery in this story (the how, why, and when of the temple and the society) to make it extremely interesting. It's been a while since I've found myself looking forward to read the next chapter of a well written story! It's very good so far! It keeps me wanting to read more - not just for the sexuality - but because it's interesting.

As far as the "mystery," and "secret" goes, I'm finding it still works just fine. The town people might know that young initiates come out to grab young men for hand jobs, but they don't necessarily know or understand why.

I'm really liking this story so far!