TBBT Website Battle 11 - Contest

Penny, Bernadette, and Amy were having a girl's night at Penny's apartment where the wine flowed freely. Of course, the subject eventually turned to the two competing websites.

"So, does Howard know about your website yet?" Penny asked.

"No! And I'd like to keep it that way," Bernadette snapped back.

"Sheldon would know if I had a pornographic website," Amy said to no one in particular.

"I guess Leonard's okay with the fact that you're a slut, huh?" Bernadette asked just before taking another sip of wine.

Penny waved a dismissive hand. "Oh hell, he knew that before we started dating." She paused. The fog of the wine cleared enough to realize Bernadette had called her a slut and that she should be offended. "Hey, wait a second..."

"Are you okay with the fact that Leonard is appearing in videos on both websites?" Amy asked.

Penny shrugged her shoulders. "Yeah, sure. Why not? I mean, I'm bangin' Bernadette's husband. What's fair is fair, right?"

"Yeah...well...I noticed he hasn't titty fucked you yet. Why is that?" Bernadette knew Penny was jealous of her tits.

"Yeah...well..." Penny smiled. "He's fucked me everywhere else. So has Howard. And Raj." She held back a laugh when she saw Bernadette's jaw clench. "Howard said my website looks totally professional."

"So, he's saying you're a professional?" Bernadette shot back.

Penny nodded confidently. "Oh yeah, that's right, baby." She paused. "Hey, wait..."

"I couldn't help but notice you can't come up with any original material. You copy everything I do."

"Copy? Hey, you didn't corner the market on blowing your dad! Or sex in public. I just do it better."

Bernadette was fuming. "Everybody knows my website is better! I've got way more clicks than you do!"

"Only because yours has been up longer than mine! You'll be eating my dust in no time."

Amy tried to lower the temperature of the room. "Now girls, they're both very fine pornographic websites where you have intercourse with anything that moves." Little did they know that Amy was a premium subscriber to both websites and was jealous of both.

"Oh please!" Bernadette huffed. "Mine is ten times better! Everybody knows that!"

"Ha! You wish."

"I have an idea," Amy interjected. "You can have a contest to see who's better."

"Ooooooo, a contest!" Bernadette was always up for a challenge, especially when it gave her a chance to beat Penny.

"What kind of contest?" Penny asked.

Amy tilted her head and scratched her chin in thought. "Oh! I know! The Pasadena street fair is next week. You both can set up kissing booths. The one who collects the most money wins!"

"I like it!" Bernadette knew most men liked big tits, and she was going to take full advantage of it. "And the loser has to go on the winner's website and congratulate them on winning. And perform a sex act of the winner's choosing!"

Penny knew most men liked slutty women. And she knew how to flaunt it. "Game on, bitch."

*****

Penny and Bernadette had booths set up at opposite ends of the street fair. Penny wore a plaid shirt, unbuttoned, and tied just below her breast. It showed plenty of cleavage and tit. For pants she went with a pair of skin-tight pink shorts that made the shorts Hooters waitresses wear look like leggings.

Bernadette went with a nearly transparent white t-shirt that was knotted just below her breast. It looked like it was about two sizes too small. It had "Bad Bernie" emblazoned across her chest. The lettering did nothing to hide her dark pink areolas and thick, erect nipples. Around her hips was wrapped a pair of short, torn jean shorts that would've made Daisy Duke look like she was over dressed.

Just before the street fair opened, Penny visited Bernadette's booth. "Cute little set up you got here."

"I just hope it's big enough to handle the buttload of cash I'm going to have," Bernadette smiled back. "I see you wore your redneck hooker clothes today."

"Yeah...well...this redneck is about to kick your Catholic ass."

"Bring it on, sister. May the best set of tits...Oh, I mean, best website win."

"Game on, bitch." Penny turned and strutted to her own booth where Leonard was waiting. "I'm gonna bury that big titted bitch," she hissed. "Help me with these t-shirts."

Leonard helped Penny load the shelf separating her from her fans with t-shirts that said "I Played In Penny's Playhouse" that she was going to sell for $25 a piece, on top of the $5 per kiss each girl had agreed to charge.

As soon as the fair opened, men lined up at each woman's booth. Every man got polite peck on the cheek and many were having their pictures taken with each girl. Many raced from one both to the other to get the same treatment.

Raj came running into Bernadette's tent and leaned into her. "You're not going to believe this but Penny is selling t-shirts!" he whispered in her ear.

Bernadette's head snapped around. "Are you fucking kidding me?!" Raj nodded his head. "That bitch! For how much?"

"$25 a piece."

"That bitch!" She thought for a moment, then turned to the crowd of men waiting for their kiss. "I'll be back in a second, guys!" She slipped behind her booth for only a minute, then came back. "I've got a special treat!" She held up a pair lacy, white thong underwear. "I just took these off! They'll go to the highest bidder! Who wants 'em?!"

Jaws dropped and the crowd gasped. "25!" broke the silence. "35!" "50!" "I'll give you $75!" Finally, "I'll give you $500!" There was an audible groan from the crowd.

"Anyone else?!" Bernadette asked with no response. "Okay, bub, come on up here!"

An older man, probably mid-50s was Raj's guess, made his way through the crowd with his buddy. "I...I can't believe I'm meeting you! I'm such a fan! A huge fan!"

Bernadette looked at him with a crooked grin. "How huge are you, buster?"

At first he was confused. "Huh?" Then it hit him. "Oh! Ha ha! Yeah, uh, well..." Bernadette held out the panties. "Oh! Hey...uh...do you think you could, you know, autograph them?"

"Absolutely! Hey, does anyone have a pen?!" Out of the crowd appeared a black Sharpie. "Perfect!" She looked at the man. "What' your name?"

"Oh! Uh, Sam."

"Sam!" She scrawled "Sam Got In My Pants -- Bad Bernie" and handed the garment to him.

Sam held it up. "Ohmagawd! That...that's awesome!" He looked at his buddy. "I'm framing this!" He looked down at Bernadette. "Thank you!"

"You're welcome, Sweetie."

"Hey, uh, you know, I, uh, um, do you think I can, you know, still get a kiss?"

"Oh! Absolutely!"

The man leaned in, expected the standard peck on the lips. Instead, Bernadette wrapped her arms around his neck, pulled him close, and gave him a long, passionate kiss.

"Fuck me," a man waiting in line muttered. "Lucky bastard."

Bernadette finally released Sam from her clutches. "Thank you, Bernie. Thank you. You're...you're the best!" Sam gushed.

"Thanks, Honey," she purred. She turned to Raj. "That should put me ahead of that bitch!" Then she whispered, "Damn! All of this kind of has my engine running!"

Not long after at Penny's tent, things were moving along. The shirts were selling well and the line was steady. A gentleman came to Penny for his peck on the lips when she noticed something unusual in his hand.

"Watcha got there, Sweetie," she asked in a sing song voice.

"Oh! I got this down at Bernie's booth! It was the underwear she was wearing. She signed it and everything!" It was Sam.

Penny's head exploded. "What?! Are you fucking kidding me? She gave you her underwear?"

Sam shook his head. "Oh no. She auctioned them off."

"She auc...how much? How did you pay for them?"

"Uh, $500."

"500 hundred doll...! Hang on, I'll be right back." She walked past Leonard with a scowl on her face. "That bitch," she growled. Soon, she reappeared. She showed Sam a red g-string. "500 bucks. I'll sell you mine for 500 bucks. Then you'll have both of ours."

"Oh my gosh! I...I wish I could. I gave all my money to Bernie!"

"Dammit," she hissed. Then, just as Bernadette had done, she held the lace in the air. "Who wants em?! My freshly soiled g-string! Who wants 'em?!" The scene at Bernadette's repeated itself. Only in this time, the highest bid was $475. After the winning bidder walked away with his cherished purchase, Penny turned to Leonard. "475? And hers went for 500? What the fuck?" Leonard simply shrugged his shoulders.

The crowds built at each tent with word that each starlet was auctioning off clothing. Word got back to Raj of Penny's sale and he informed Bernadette.

"What?! That bitch couldn't come up with an original idea if it would save her life! How much? How much did she get for hers?"

"475 dollars."

"Ha! Bitch!" But Bernadette realized that between that and the t-shirts, Penny was surely ahead of her in sales. And that was unacceptable. The next man stepped up for his $5 kiss. "Tell you what. For 50 bucks I'll let you get a picture of you with your hand on my boob. How 'bout it?" In a flash there was a wrinkled President Grant on the shelf.

Nearly every man in line plopped down a $50 bill for the chance to touch her famous globes. Many did more than touch. There was a lot of sly gropes and pinches along the way. Bernadette slapped the more aggressive ones away. But, for the most part, let the men have their quick grope. The heat between her legs built with every new touch.

Eventually, one of Bernadette's previous customers had worked his way through the line to Penny. He laid his $5 bill down and got his kiss. Unlike the others, he stood there for a moment.

"Um, can I, uh, touch your, you know, uh...boob?"

Penny couldn't believe the words she just heard. "What?! No!"

Someone a few men back said, "Bernie's doing it!"

"What?!" Penny shrieked. "Seriously?" There were several nods and verbal confirmations. Penny turned to Leonard. "That big titted bitch!" She looked back at the man in front of her. "What, did she, like, take off her shirt or what?"

The man shook his head. "Oh no. She just, you know, lets you put her hand on, you know, them."

Penny clenched her jaw, paused, then untied the knot of her shirt. "Tell you what..." She raised her voice. "75 bucks to grab my tits! I'll open my shirt and you can grab my tits!"

From that point on, Penny's shirt spent more time open than closed. Leonard couldn't believe he was getting a hard-on watching these men grope his girlfriend. Penny was ready for more than her tits to be groped.

"You know, Penny's letting us grab her, uh, tit," a customer mentioned to Bernadette.

"Really? So? You can grab mine, too, bub."

"No, I mean grab her tit. Like, she opens her shirt and, you know..."

"She opens her shirt?! And lets you grab her tiny little naked tit?!"

"Well...they're not that tiny..."

That slutty bitch! "Grrrrrrrrr..." she growled. She looked at Raj, hoping for a suggestion that didn't come. She looked back at the stranger. "Tell you what. For a hundred bucks you can come into the booth. I'll get down on my knees. You can take a picture that looks like I'm about to give you a blow job. How's that?"

The man's eyebrows rose. "Um...okay!"

Raj opened the curtain and allowed the man into the booth. He handed Raj his camera and took his spot in the center of the booth. Just as she said, Bernadette dropped to her knees. The man jumped when she unexpectedly placed her hand on his quickly growing bulge. She turned to Raj, sticking her ample chest out and giving him her best fuck-me eyes while the man had a thoroughly shocked look on his face, and snapped the picture. The bright light from each flash made her shirt almost transparent.

From that time forward, Bernadette spent most of her time on her knees with her hand on men's crotches. The bulges varied in bulk, from almost nonexistent to "wow". She couldn't help but wonder what each bulge looked like out in the open. The fire between her legs was almost unbearable.

"Raj, why don't you go back to my house and grab the video camera. This would make for some great freebie, tease content, don't you think?"

"Ya! Great idea!"

They were four hours into the competition. Unbeknownst to each other, Bernadette was ahead of Penny by about $400.

That's when Penny shrieked, "What?! She's doing what?!"

The customer hesitantly replied, "She, uh, she's getting on her knees, puts her hand on your, you know, there, and acts like she's about to give you a, uh, um, you know, a..."

"A blow job! She acts like she's about to give you a blow job?!"

"Well, uh, yeah, kinda."

"Goddammit," Penny hissed. She turned to Leonard. "Fuck it." She turned back to the waiting crowd. "Who wants a blow job?! Who wants a fucking blow job for 200 bucks?!"

Leonard's head dropped into his hands. "Awwwww, shit."

The sound that followed was jaws in the crowd hitting the paved street.

The first customer stepped into the booth. Penny surveyed the situation. She finally tuned the man so that his back was facing the crowd and pushed him back against the barrier she had just been standing behind to shield as much of the action as possible.

She dropped to her knees in front of the man and looked into his wide eyes with a devilish look on her face. "Ready, Sweetie?" she cooed.

The man nodded nervously. "Uh, uh, I, uh, I think so," he stammered.

ZIP

The man gasped when her warm hand reached inside his khaki shorts and gripped his stiff pole. She pulled it out and revealed a perfectly average stiffy.

She tenderly stroked the man and whirred, "Mmmmmm, did I do this? Did you get all hard thinking about me?"

"Uh, uh, yeah, I guess."

"You guess?" she mocked.

"Yes! Definitely! Thinking about you...always...you know...makes me hard."

"Mmmmmm, that's nice. Do you want me to stick this in my mouth? Hmmmm? Do you want me to stick your big, hard cock in my dirty mouth?"

"Oh God! Yes! Yes I...gah!" The man's head snapped back when he slipped between her lips.

The crowd smashed against the front of the booth trying to get a view of the action. Only a handful of hopefuls were able to lean across the front of the booth to get a glimpse of Penny's bobbing head.

"Oh shit! She's really doing it!"

"Look at her go!"

"Lucky bastard!"

Penny felt him throb as soon as she took him into her mouth. This won't take long! She sucked as hard as she could and bobbed as fast as she could.

"Oh God! Oh God! Ohhhhhhhmagawd! Guh...guh...gahhhhh!"

She hadn't even had time to take him down her throat. Poor bastard! she thought with a chuckle. Her mouth quickly flooded with thick, warm spunk. She sucked on the spurting head and stroked his shaft, coaxing every last drop out.

She finally pulled back and released him with a pop. His entire body slumped. She stood up and smiled into his face.

"How was that, Sweetie?"

"Worth every penny," he panted.

She giggled and licked a trickle of white from the corner of her lips. "He he! I'm glad. Okay, Sweetie, move along. Looks like I've got a lot more guys to take care of."

The man had almost forgotten he was in front of a crowd. "Oh! Right! Of course." He tucked and zipped. "Uh, thank you, Penny."

"My pleasure, Sweetie." He started to walk away. "Oh! Don't forget to sign up for a membership on my website!" She looked into the crowd. "Okay, who's next?" Leonard took two crisp $100 bills from what he guessed was a college student and let him in. Penny smiled at him. "Hello, handsome." She lead him to where the previous customer had been standing and turned his back to the crowd. She dropped to her knees and began to unzip his pants. "Let's see what we've got here." The young man held his breath. He grunted when Penny reached in and grabbed his tool. A very nice, albeit thin, stiff rod fell out of his pants. "Oooooo, very nice," she purred into his face while she gently stroked him. "I'll bet you make your girlfriend pretty happy with this, huh?"

"Well, uh, she hasn't, um, exactly seen it," he said with shame.

"Really? You mean, you guys haven't done it yet? She hasn't even given you a hand job?" He shook his head. "Her loss," she said with a twinkle in her eyes and a crooked grin.

Just as she started to lean in, the young man spoke up.

"Um, can you...would it be possible...you know...would you do it with, um, you know, your, uh, shirt off? You know, show I can see, you know..."

"Oh! You're a tit man!" She thought for a second. "For an extra 20 bucks, sure, Sweetie."

He couldn't get his wallet out fast enough. He handed Leonard another dead president. His eyes didn't leave Penny as she slowly peeled off her shirt. His eyes were wide as saucers when she laid the shirt on the ground.

She cupped her breasts and looked up at his stunned face. "Is this what you wanted, Sweetie? Hmmm? Do you like my titties?"

He struggled to nod his head. "Uh...uh...ohmagawd...uh, yeah...Uhgah!" She swallowed his meat like a starving man at Thanksgiving.

Once again, she felt him pulsing in her mouth the second she took him in. Easy money! Once again, the crowd leaned in to get a view.

"Oh...oh...ohmagosh, Penny! That...that feels...so...good!"

"Mmmmhmmmm! Mmmmmhmmm!" The inferno between her legs was almost unbearable. Out of pure habit, not even taking the crowd into consideration, her hand slid down her taut stomach and under the waistband of her shorts. She blurted out a muffled yipe at the first brush of a finger across her excited clit.

"Oh shit! Look at that!" one of the customers yelled.

"Damn! She's really getting into it!"

"I'm gonna stab her fuckin' brain!"

"Save me some!"

At the other end of the street fair, Bernadette felt like she'd touched 1,000 crotches. Her legs had gone numb. Before escorting the next customer to see Bernadette, Raj whispered something in Bernadette's ear.

Her head snapped around. "She's doing what?!" she screeched.

Raj had heard that tone before. He jumped back. "Hey, don't shoot the messenger!"

"She's giving them blowjobs?! Actual blowjobs!"

"Ya, that's what they're saying."

"She sure is!" came a voice from the crowd.

Bernadette clenched her jaw. "That bitch!" The crowd gasped when her shirt flew over her head, exposing the breasts everyone had seen on her website and masturbated to. She cupped her breasts and turned to the crowd. "Okay! Who wants a titty fuck?! Who wants to fuck my big, fat titties?!" She looked up at Raj. "There's something that bitch can't give 'em!"

"Me!"

"I do!"

"Oh hell yes!"

"300 to cum on my tits! 350 to finish in my mouth! Got it?!" The crowd got very loud with excitement. She turned to Raj. "Raj, you should probably go down to one of those craft booths and buy some towels. I think this is going to get messy. See if you can find some baby oil or something, too." While Raj ran off to do as asked, Bernadette climbed onto wobbly legs and chatted with the men in the front of the crowd, giving them a close up look at their fantasy while also getting feeling back in her legs.

After a few minutes of chatting with her adoring fans, several autographs, and some free grabs, Raj returned with the towels and hand lotion. Bernadette grabbed her next client, a tall, handsome man, by the hand and led him around the front of the booth. He handed Raj his money and stepped into the booth. Just as Penny had done, Bernadette spun the man around so his back was to the crowd and dropped to her knees and noticed the man's sizeable bump in his pants. Whoa! The man smiled down at her as she began to unzip his pants.

FLOP!

A huge, thick muscle fell out of the man's trousers like a huge tree falling in the forest.

"Sweet Jesus!" Bernadette gasped. She turned to Raj whose face was hidden behind the video camera lens. "Are you getting this, Raj?"

"Oh ya!"