by Tx Tall Tales
Thank you for such a great read. I was so sad when it ended. I want more of these characters please try and publish or expand on this book.
I really liked the concepts of this story
Pages 1-13 did excellent in world building character development and plot but the ending just seemed rushed like you only had 15 pages to work with or you had a deadline
I’d like a more fleshed out ending
The ending is paramount
7.5/10
This is such a great story and so well written. I would pay for this in book form! You should be published!!
One of the best stories on this site. I love it so much!
I enjoyed the shit out of this one! Hardly eloquent, I know, but that was my first reaction when I finished reading and thought you might like a completely honest opinion. Loved the characters and the building menace, while always fearing that tragedy might doom them all. Sure, there were unanswered questions, but that's so much more real than a neat little parcel of facts to tie everything up with a pretty little bow.
Respect, sir!
I came here to read a story just about adult things and wow I left here read a story that I wish was in a book form
First time I have wanted to leave a comment.
Loved this story, some more about the house, maybe Mary's story, then the civil war and how the first fire started ?
Just a thought, thanks for a good story.
Throughly good page turner. In the mold of James Herbert a terrific hirror/occult writer. Well done
This was beautifully written, and exactly what I was looking for in a story. Thank you for all of the work you put into crafting this gem.
If you want to read a good story this is it. You won't be dissapointed.
Loved it so much! Beautifully constructed with well thought out character arcs for everyone. Loved the plot and how it progresses slowly, gradually without the urgency to finish it! On the whole, it is perfect! This needs to be made into a movie or a person series :)
amazing!!!!! just amazing!!!!!
you must come with a sequal.
This is by far the best story I've ever read in this category! Exceptionally well done!
very sweet enduring and enticing story that kept my interest all the way thru
This story was the first story that I decided was worth commenting on. The plot and sex enraptured me to no ends, causing me to finish the story in a mad rush. The characters were so well-constructed and realistic that I feel as if Mary was sitting with me as I am reading. Definitely the best I ever read. Thank you!!! ;)
Such a different, sweet story of pure love, loss, and the deeper love that grew from it. Hard to keep the sniffles at bay more than once and I am 64 and a bit of a tough nut. Not nice to make an old man cry but you did a good job of it. Loved it. Thank you
This is a magnificent story! Wonderful writing, thank you for sharing!
A very interesting tale, I certainly loved the characters traits....very well written.
All I can say is, unique, the story's better than I thought it would be.
Without doubt, the best story I've ever read on Literotica, and I've here for years. I actually wondered, near the end, if Bev wasn't Mary daughter, who'd miraculously survived, all those years back. Regardless, this was a thrill for me and I broke it up into several relaxed readings! Thanks for your effort!
I knew you could write, but that was brilliant. It would have been nice to know how Jack was related. Because it's hard to believe he wasn't. A far-off cousin, perhaps, raised in foster homes, still dimly able to feel the ancestral pull, the connection that those born to the House all know.
you'd be surprised at how much of that could actually happen
Too bad I can't give you some more stars because the story definitely warrants it...
Still enjoying it and appreciate all the work that went into it...
I really felt a connection between Jack and myself. I grew up in Virginia and knew of a number of old estates, though none of them had fallen into disrepair like you described, but it was easy for me to imagine.
Slow build to the horror and mystery surrounding the house. (spoiler) Bev's death had me in tears. Were the evil spirits soldiers or deserters that had died on the property?
But loved this one! Thank you again for the stories, may they continue to come forever (no, don’t get any ideas on becoming a ghost at Literotica ;) ).
Loved it...wished there was a back story of how the dark ones came to be but all in all ..excellent story line..keep it up!!!
This was a delight to read. A departure from my usual preferences that I found refreshing. Well done!
Love this story, perfect blend between plot and erotica. 5 stars :)
I'm thankful that writing these stories seems to be a labor of love for you, because I sure love reading them, and sharing with a friend! :) Regarding this one, lovvvved the creativity!
Maybe I'm just a big scaredy cat, but I don't normally read horror stories. I can't fathom what brought me to this category and I don't know how I found this story, in particular, but I'm oooooh so glad I did! It's not only one of the best I've read on this site. It's one of the best I've ever read, period! I greatly appreciate your sharing this with us. Lacking your eloquence to convey my enjoyment, I'm just going to end this by saying, WOW!!!!
This story left me breathless.It's 5 am, only stopped reading to go to bathroom, started last night , just finished reading.Excellentisimo///.What a plot, great character development, continuity, all greatly.written with insight and.love.Love conquers evil, adversity, and time and distance. Truly hope you will continue this saga of enchantment.Bev was reincarnated in Mary's image, so she can continue to be with.her "son and grands", this time around, prolonging Bev's life which was.close to it's end, and giving Mary a longer life this time around.Jack and his three ladies live happily ever after..Now I can go to sleep.Good nite sweet Prince Jack.
By far out of all others written by you TX, I like it the best. Question for you if you're reading this...... Ever consider writing romance novels as a side gig? My X reads some similar to what you write. Great character building & at times.... Story lines have been well developed with thought & care. Keep up the great work!
I had to read this one again. I read it when you first wrote it for the contest, I couldn't stop reading it. I was obsessed. And here again, I was obsessed reading it all over again. Wish I could give 10 stars!
One of the best stories that I have read in a long time!
The Old Racer
One of the best stories I have ever read. An honest-to-goodness page turner.
An impossibly rare horror story where you don't have to suspend disbelief.
On this site, I read one whole sentence in five, skim the rest, get irritated if more than three pages.
This one, I couldn't stop reading every word - all fifteen pages.
Has everything well done. Criticism: three trite phrases. Out of fifteen pages, that is fabulous.
If you only have time for one medium-length story, read this one.
If you only have time for one short story, read this one anyway.
Otherwise, when you finally get around to this one, you will regret not reading it earlier.
I loved this tale. This has the makings of a movie. Please consider turning it into a screenplay and trying to attract a producer.
Best story I have read on here. And I've been reading stories here for fourteen years. Had me laughing, crying, and appropriately arroused. BRAVO!!!!
First story I have read in this category and I loved it!!!
Great Job man keep it up!!!
Your Awesome!!!
I got more of the story this time because I was rushing to see what was going to happen next
I don't normally read in this Genre of stories but this was well crafted. I started and took no breaks I had to reach the ending.
While this is not a section I normally read the author is one of my favorites which is what got me to read. So very pleased I did read - throughly enjoyable reading time.
A sincere thank you for writing and sharing this story and all your other writings. Good story, good characters and severalt twists to add to the story with great effect!
As I paraphrase another writer - please keep writing and I will keep reading! I will add checking on my favorite authors which is how I found this reading diamond worth 5+ stars. Highest compliment I can give - I will be reading this story again!!!
Too bad we'll never know quite what the evil was.... Something pre-existing to the house - based in the area - Or some VERY bad people who died around the origin of the house...
But I loved that Bev saved them from it...
You should seriously think about submitting this story to someone who would be in a position to have it turned into a movie. I am a heavy reader of books that were made into movies and this one is by far one of the best i have ever had the pleasure of reading.
A beautifully written story with an interesting and intriguing plot. More like this please
My house is 100+years old and needed a lot of work, but not as much as the one in your story. I had little help but it helped to make your tale more solid.. I have lived in houses in the past that were haunted butnot by malevolent spirits.cI had my closest contact with a female spirit that had died in child birth and was always asking if I had seen her baby in a thick portugese accent. With some help from a clairvoint friend we convinced her to go to the light to find her child. We never felt her presence again and the feelof the house was much lighter. Ghosts do exist and are not to be messed with.
I loved your story and look forward to more from you in the future.
thanks from the old biker.
Well written..really enjoyed the story. It's intriguing and very interesting. Kudos
Second time reading this and loved it more if possible. I often try to find the places in a story, but this one stumped me, since Fredricksburg and Millville didn't fit distance and timelines.
Really enjoyed this story, couldn't put it down. Most worthy of its place in the highest-rated charts. Keep up the good work!
I absolutely loved it! The details were excellent and I felt a genuine connection with the characters. Definitely my favorite story thus far!
As usual, you knocked our socks off. I agree, this would make a great movie!
Don't ever stop writing!
What a great story! This is far beyond what I would expect to find on a website. I re ad this in a single sitting. It was compelling. Consider going back in, expanding the characters, adding some backstory. I think this really could be a good full-length novel. Well done!
Wow. Bravo! I was 100% immersed in the world. I would gladly read this again.
This is an amazing story, worthy of publishing. The details are well done and the characteristic fleshed out. You built this story as he built the house. Just pulls you in.
I loved it and I hope you can write more like this story I would give you my email so u could email similar but yeah sorry
This story is to show how love can actually show how strong love can be. Yes I know the is fictional. There is plenty of evidence out there to prove how strong love is for some people. I loved reading this story and other of stories by the same author. I do not mind that there is not allot of sex content the stories can stand on their own as it is. please keep up with the good writing.
You are very gifted. This was truly a great read and I love your style. Enough details to paint the broad picture, while letting the reader fill in micro details. The pace is exactly right, and let's it flow. I am going through all your stories now and am impressed and enjoying it. Thank you for sharing.
Can't believe I didn't read this when it was out 3 years ago. I had seen your name but was so wrapped up in my own writing I didn't read many others, if only not to copy by accident.
I couldn't have written a haunted story better than this! The writing was impeccable and I adored the characters.
I, too, wanted an answer to the spirits on the 3rd floor. It was up during civil war so lots of angry soldiers but still....missed something. And yes, the ending was a bit rushed but after 100 pages I can relate... you just wanted it over. Lol
Loved hearing of my hometown, Dulles/northern VA. But the Chesapeake isn't really near Dulles and certainly not an hour from Fredericksburg. With TX in your name not sure if you're a Texan or not. I find it difficult to write of a town I've never been...
Okay, enough critics. LOVED it beyond words. You are one of the better authors on this site. It seems ones from 2 years ago are gone and self-publishing for the money. Good for them but sad for us.
AWESOME SAUCE!
Great story. Couldn't stop reading. Hope you come up with more stories.
I must admit I loved every aspect of this story. It was amazingly written.
This story to me was phenomenal, thank you so much for sharing. It has been a great read, and warranted my very first registration and comment after years on this site. :)
An excellent, catch the reader and hold on, story. Thank you for a really good read.
Your stories are absolutely amazing!! The characters and plots are so wonderfully engaging. I have rarely felt myself being drawn into stories as I have with yours. This tale is especially great because not only does it have your usual cast of engaging characters, it also has unique plot AND (I believe), the ever-elusive perfect ratio of sex to plot. I couldn't put it down last night. PLEASE, keep up the great work!
I thought this was a short story, but it turned out to be very very good. You are so talented.
and I do appreciate the difference in this and the others you write. I liked it but I think you liked it too. Thanks ... Scotty
Very nicely done story remind me of ghost stories here in Vermont.
this was one of the most beautifully written pieces I have ever read. I cried and I laughed and I wish there was more to it. Thank you for the time you put into this work of art.
That was very well worth the time to read it. I hope you continue to write in this genre. It's not really horror, but more like a good ghost story. The reintroduction of Bev at the end was excellent. Thank you for such a good work.
I have read a lot of stories here on Literotica, and have never left a comment before. But, I felt I had to this time. I wish there was a 10 STAR button. Because this story certainly deserves it.
Absolutely the best I have read.
great story once started to read had to finish'' i love these kind of tales
Dang that's one long story! But well worth it. Just under 2hrs of reading
Honestly my first and possibly only review I will do. I loved this story, started a little later then I probably should have but I had to finish before putting it down. Amazing job, keep them coming!:)
That was the best story I've read on ANY site. This story could stand up well even without the sexual references. Excellent spelling, grammar, sentence structure, and overall story flow. Outstanding creativity. Very well done!!!
That was one of the best written stories I have read on this site in a long time ever think of adding more to it and getting it published professionally?