All Comments on 'That Phrase... Sylvia Ch. 02'

glad to see you continuing the story. nice touch with mindy. one down-side, the husband's only emotion is revenge. any pain or emotional trauma that is his motivating factor? what is his emotion?

When readers are involved in a story, don't suddenly remind them that it's just a story.

He said he didn't want an open marriage, but he went out of is way to fuck another woman. Isn't that part of what an open marriage is?

If the main character is an introvert like me, he won't outwardly show the emotion that is the motivation for his actions. I become calm in a storm and take action to resolve the issue. This seems to be what is happening here. Maybe the author could have chosen to reveal to us this man's inner turmoil a little more graphically, but his choice to let actions tell the story work just as well. It's a matter of style, and I like where and how this story is being developed.

This guy doesn't read as though he's lost anything. He is full of proactive action, and that's good, but if the end of a marriage doesn't affect you anymore then dusting off your hands and saying "well, that's the end of that," then you didn't have much of a marriage to begin with and you didn't really lose anything. So there's no story.

Writers in this forum love to shave down the emotional fallout of betrayal and divorce in order to spin a good fantastical yarn, and I can appreciate where that comes from, but the degree to which you shave down the impact of betrayal is EXACTLY matched by the degree to which the betrayal matters. If a wife cheats on her husband and he is able to just shrug his shoulders and grab a new woman up at random, then go on with his life without a moments care, well then…the cheating didn't really mean all that much, did it? Heck, if he's the type of person who can just wave his marriage off without so much as a tear, then it makes sense to me that he probably would have ended up marrying somebody who was equally singular in their outlook, so I can even start to understand the mindset of why one of these two people would think it was okay to cheat.

Basically, by underselling the emotional drama that comes from being cheated on, you make the cheating not so big a crime, the hero not so heroic for having nothing to overcome, and the eventual happy ending not really all that happy because there wasn't anything making us doubt that conclusion in the first place.

I like the story, but these short chapters with breaks while you feel like writing, make it hard to follow the story. In my opinion, it would be better to write the whole story and submit it all at once.

Wow,, I agree with what you said. It is some emotional cruelty that he is putting her through. If it is over, then state so. Let her move on with her life, and not waste time. He stated that he loved her a little bit still, but he doesn't act like it. He is just wasting more money to keep the lawyer retain. Right now, I view him as vindictive. If he did have any love left, just let her go, and learn from her mistake. There are somee mistakes that can't be forgiven.

So he told her it was okay to cheat as long as she followed his rules, and now he continues to lie and cheat on her after she's realized her mistake. Why are we even remotely supposed to sympathize with this cold, emotionless ass hole? At this point it seems like she was right to want out. And he hasn't even revealed himself to bea violent, abusive psychopath like this author's typical male leads yet.

The author actually made the same mistake in this chapter as he did in the first, continuity. In the first he sent mixed signals between his rules and saying no. In this chapter he punishes his wife for going out with another man but has no problem seeing another woman.

I was hoping miko would have learned something from the feedback he got before but it's obvious he has learned nothing. This is boring and stupid. I'm done with it.

... as you would expect from this writer, but I must agree with the commenters who are questioning the guys affection for his wife. He isn't fighting for his marriage, nor is he even particularly distraught. Instead he treats his spouse like a car that has fallen into disrepair and must be exchanged for another one. I don't feel any emotional pain, there is no inner conflict, I sense no hesitation on his part. It's simply: "You broke the rules - bye bye." This is not a credible marriage.

The ending of part 2 hints at something life changing happening in part 3 with relation to the mans job. I hope it's not the usual "promoted-to-VP-with-mega-salary-so-he-can-kick-wifey-even-harder-despite-the-fact-that-she-is-down-already" kinda thing.

Confesses to her husband she wants an open marriage he so no but she goes ahead anyway. No way she could not know this will end there marriage. I cannot believe she is that stupid and listening to that whore of a friend. This is so dumb.

using different punctuations or inflection, TK U MLJ LV NV

wife wanted open marriage. Husband said no. Husband said here are rules but also begged her not to and said there would be consequences. She did it anyway. All that happened in chapter one. In chapter 2 nothing happened. Husband and wife didnt talk at all. Husband had sex with somebody else, hid it from wife and listened to her talk to friend. Is that really all?

He warned her not to go she did anyway. Who would seriously want to stay with a woman that had to go fuck another man. You must enjoy sharing your wife then cleaning up after her when she says oh baby i made a mistake. What a douche.

You said until I write again......Well hurry up...lol.

Well, Sweetie was RIGHT! Their sex life is NOT boring any more! Despite the fact that their marital sex life is now non-existent, their marital relationship is now VERY dynamic and exciting. Neither aspect is necessarily positive, but the relationship promises to be even more exciting after Sweetie is served!

5*

I enjoyed it. An easy read. Most of what's being described I've seen in real-life unfortunately so it is believable.

The only thing I don't understand is why he's recording his wife's interactions, but doesn't bother to actually watch the complete recordings. I think most readers would feel a guy would scour recordings for every detail and explanation he could and your hero's lack of doing so is never explained.

4*

Not had went. Sole not soul. Just a few but enough mistakes to lower my score basically for carelessness.

His behavior assumes personality issues not in evidence! His reaction might be understandable if he had a history of betrayal and trust issues in his past, but you haven't demonstrated that. So why is he not feeling more over his wife's activities? In fact, why is he not showing any emotions that goes hand in hand with a long term relationship being destroyed?

with a shotgun.

Some people do use shotguns for rabbit hunting.

I like your writing but have got to speed up your delivery times. I get bored waiting for the next segment. Better to wait and deliver the entire story.

even though some want to explain away or want justification for the husband's actions. I don't care. It's a good read. Again, I compare it the another story mentioned before where the husband begs the wife not to go out on that first day, but she does anyway, and gets fucked by another man. She deserves what she gets. So he's revengeful and vindictive. Who knows what anyone would do in this situation. Please don't wait and give us Ch. 03 soon. 5 *'s

If he is going to leave the wife, he should accept the fifty fifty split and move out immediately. Husband does not come across as a likeable character.

Rightbank......I've always hunted rabbits with a shotgun (a browning 410 pump actually). And what praytell would be used if a shotgun was not the weapon of choice? The story has a good start but I agree with the others......it's tough waiting on the rest of the story. Please finish more of the story before you download it to this site. Other than that, I gave it a four and hope to see more soon. thanks again.....samsiewamsie

How about a little more character development?

I agree with the commenters that you haven't shown any reason the husband wanted the marriage to stay together in the first place.

Could I suggest -- husband finally admits to wife that he reconsidered her suggestion, and while maintaining his three rules, agrees to the open marriage.

Husband then calls up Ronnie and thanks her for the suggestion. He then has an ongoing affair with Ronnie, Mindy, and others while wife sits home.

He adds another rule - no sex between husband and wife without monthly STD tests first.

Husband tells wife "I love you, thanks for the suggestion!" and cancels the divorce proceedings.

He spent the better part of a week trying to convince his wife not to cheat before she went out and did it. After that, "likeable" is too much for her to expect. There's no indication of him treating anyone other than his cheater wife badly. At least not so far.

But what kind of moral principles does this guy have? Either he tells her, fine, I agree to the open marriage but doubt that there will any room for you on my schedule, or gives her divorce papers. Of course we have the cliff hanger ending to draw us on. By the way, has everyone noted we have lost PapaToad and Denham Forrest in June?

Papatoad had a letter in june in his own blog. My inform he had a catarachta operation and against he could drive, but he could not write in front of his monitor.

I hope the news are not true............

He has already moved on from her. She has made her move to go. Now he is whining about his divorce. Why not give her 50% and move in with Mindy? No sympathy for either.

So far I have enjoyed the story looking forward to the next part.

A pretty good chapter tho I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop with characters going batshit crazy and nonsensical plot-holes. Hubby tried for a week to prevent wifey from fucking around so he more than fought for the marriage. Once she broke her vows why the fuck should he be held to his? As for calling him a hypocritical asshole while pointing out how men get screwed in divorces pretty much explains his actions and how hes looking out for himself.

15 year a happily married couple , now she comes home after listening to her whore friend and wants to experiment with others to liven her sex life up. the writer is making her dumber than dumb. he says no open marriage and she does it anyway, I am glad I did not write this crap. he goes out after her rendezvous . he goes to another and fucks her, both being ass holes . is that how we solve our problems???? one wacked out story line..

You fell in love with and remained devoted for years to a simpleton airhead. She then did one simpleton stupid thing. You responded with scorched earth anger. I'm normally a BTB enthusiast, but here I'm leaning toward the only human being in this story - the wife.

While I believe in consequences, I also believe in certain cases reconciliation and forgiveness is possible.....her infidelity was a one time thing, she seems truly to regret her poor choices....his BTB response seems unreasonable and extreme. It is not as if she had a long term affair, she was unduly influenced by a slut friend.

By the way, his affair is "worse" then hers, they are still married, she was influenced by a "friend" to commit adultery...he chooses to do so and continues to do so in secret prior to the divorce...in my mind his deceitfulness is worse then hers.

It might just be my opinion but she might not actually have regrets about what she's done. She's being coaxed by her lover into throwing her husband a mercy fuck to pacify him. She probably just dislikes no longer being in his world. Also it's not like he wants to stay married he's made his point pretty clear.

We all know Mikoli ALWAYS reconciles the relationship in his stories, if its not the case in this one, the husband is an asshole having a continuing affair when all we know about the wife is the one time, so he'll use her adultery as reason for divorce when in reality, his is far worse, she was up front about it, he is sneaking around to do it. 1*

We're dragging this out a little. At this point he is as guilty as her. Why not just take the fifty-fifty split and call it a marriage. Then she can live with her guilt and he can live in Mindy. Sounds fair to me, and I am a big BTB fan. Probably the biggest here. Looking forward to ch. 3.

She's sorry? So what? She's a whore, a sorry whore but a whore none the less. She broke the marriage contract, so why should he abide by it? The guy is supposed to remain faithful when his slut wife isn't? Give me a break. What's good for the goose is even better for the gander. She never flat out told him who she was going to be with, why should he tell her anything?

both are breaking there wows, she does it once he does it dozens of times. she is wrong and he is an asshole. these two deserve each other. one dumb women one male cheater. one stupid story line. so whose the real bitch here. she knows she f--ked up, he has too . is this how we solve our relationships. sad to think so. he does not own her and she does not own him but both made a pact when married. it either work it out or divorce.

The anonymous asshole was commenting on the Burn the Bitch Crowd is probably a slut cheater herself. Listen, whore, once you loose the trust of your spouse who tells her husband in part one, she is going to have a date and wants an open marriage and he has no choice, shows the lac of respect. I hope you die a rotten death from a good disease because you clearly want to blame the guy for her selfish slut actions.

1) Women are NEVER "Sorry" after the fact.

They are simply seeking "forgiveness" (read:acceptance)

Women believe it is easier to seek foregiveness than permission.

So smart men don't play their game!

2) After she breaks their vows, THEY'RE BROKEN!

By breaking the vows, she RELEASES him.

He's now free to do what he chooses.

What don't you understand about that?

You can say "tough guy" or whatever you want.

but I would NEVER accept back a woman who did what she did.

Thanks for the read.

I thought the first chapter was good but this is just getting really stupid, but I see it's brought out all the btb cucks who've got their nickers in a tizz. Nice one girls( opps guys ).

You're writing is ok, not great , just ok. It certainly seemed to have fallen away from the first chapter. Just a question, how is what he is doing with Mindy not the same as Sylvia's cheating, two wrongs never make a right. I failed to see how it's possible to go from love to hate so quickly. AND before all the btb brigade start sending in the troops, if you haven't been in this situation before don't comment , if you have did you all go out to get some revenge fucking like Don before the divorce was final or the papers even served hhmmmmmm! I know I didn't, I was too shattered & angry, sex was the last thing on my mind.

Ch 1 - good 4****

Ch2 - fair, low 3***

Just to appease some of the obviously ranting btb fans.

I don't condone what Sylvia did in any way. I don't believe Don should take her back, the disrespect is too great.

BUT he shouldn't have cheated with Mindy so quickly either. The only sane result for these two is divorce even thought Sylvia's showing signs of regret & perhaps remorse, too bad, too late.

Another cliff hanger at the end!!!! Really like the story so far but if he turns wimp cuckold then not so much.

Thanks for the offering.

If you hunt rabbit with a shotgun, you do not hunt them for the meat. At more than 10' the blast will destroy any edible muscle tissue (meat) on an average rabbit and leave so many fragments of shot you will be picking it out for hours.

what do I use? I use a 22.with long rifle bullets. same as I use for quail.

...when using a shotgun and for that reason, the shot pattern is long from the swing and usually very open. Most shots are closer to 30 yards so few pieces of shot actually hit the rabbit. That being said, I use a .22 also, in handgun form since I don't hunt them with dogs.

BTW, don't mention you are using a .22 for quail. That is against the law in every state I'm aware of and is enforced Federally.

As to the story, the torturing of Sylvia needs to continue, by ignoring her. Let her believe they might get back together and then stomp her guts out in the courtroom.

He needs to make sure someone fucks Ronnie and gives her not just a handful of STD's but also a thick helping of HIV.

....how stupid the spelunking BTB lynchmob is to not understand the concept of a Sacred Oath. This is why so many of them turn out to be right-wing cracked teapotty secessionists.

Listen up dolts. When YOU make your marriage vows, that oath is to both God and your spouse. Your spouse makes an oath to God and you.

If one person violates that Sacred Oath, it does NOT release the other party from their obligation. It is NOT a contract you can fudge with and manipulate to your own profit.

I'm going to keep posting these comments till authors stop using "no-fault" as a crutch.

I will freely admit that I am NOT a lawyer, and I am prepared to be corrected, but my understanding is that no-fault simply refers to the GROUNDS for divorce. That is, before no-fault laws, if you wanted to divorce your spouse you had to find some fault with them, that is the "grounds for the divorce". No fault laws simply removed the need to prove any fault on the part of the other party in order to get the divorce.

Divorce settlements are a separate issue, and I suppose some states may take into account what the offending spouse may have done wrong, but I do not believe this is significant, except of course where child custody is involved.

It never ceases to amaze me the number of "perfect" men that are out there. You BTB idiots out there who wouldn't know true love if it was right in front of them. Love is unconditional. It doesn't mean you only love the other person if they are nice to me or doesn't hurt you. Sure, if a spouse cheats it can destroy a marriage and lead to an end to the love. But cheating a day after your spouse does doesn't make you a "real" man or a hero. Hiding your own revenge affair so you can do better in the division of assets is both unrealistic and stupid. This story would never lead to a happy ending for either spouse. And the cheerleaders for insecure husbands and their holier than thou attitudes is not erotic. It's non-erotic.

You out yourself as a Leftist loony! One of the granola crunching, bunny hugging, I hate oil except for me me me, anti self defense, hate the military and cops crowd!

Nice one, Commie!

or dazzle them with Olde Fashioned B.S...TK U MLJ LV NV

But you are a wimp and a cuckold. You could have prevented her"date" but you didn't. You're now a hypocrite too.

Can understand the feeling behind Splitaces comment but what can be done, in real life possibly enlist the help of a relation or good friend to talk sense to her in time before she went through with her date, as far as story goes he tried persuasion and warned her that there would be consequences, that only leaves physical restraint, that's illegal and could put in trouble with the law. Enjoying your story mikoli5763.

You need an editor, and to learn tenses and the use of the words, "went" and "gone". Still a pretty good story so far.

Like his lawyer told him. He has no proof of infidelity. Just some love bites that she could claim he gave her. So while he suspects her of cheating, he lacks proof. Meanwhile, he's doing the same thing. He's cheating. Neither of them is a very nice person. Certainly not fun or entertaining to read about. Pick up the pace.

everything looks good on the horizon. TK U MLJ LV NV

She cheats, then, HE CHEATS REPEATEDLY! YOUR FUCKING SICK!!!!!

2 fuckin cheaters. one dumbass swinging bitch and her dopey cheating cuckold claiming the moral high ground because she did it first

Another cuck and LW story annony read and loved. pay no attention to his ravings, He loves these stories or why else would he read so many?

Writing is done well. However, if he wanted to see other women "because she ruined the marriage", he should have officially separated. The way it sits now, he's just as bad as her. But it still an interesting read, so ill continue. Thank you for your time writing. I know it's a lot more than just slapping something down on paper. Even the critics are usually grateful

At least she apologises. He is just a complete pompous, arrogant, self righteous jerk.

This is a well-written story. But both parties are cheaters. The only difference is the wife started one day sooner than the husband. And the evidence given indicates the wife is guilty only once; but the husband is now a repeat offender. I am hoping at this point that the wife takes him to the cleaners. But I really hope her friend Veronica pays dearly for her role in destroying a marriage.

he actually did accept an open marriage.

now he's just a sanctimonious hypercrite.

The wife dealt the cas, he's just playing out the hand.

I love to watch them cry and squirm when they suddenly realize that the "friend" might not have given them good advice.

Agreed!

The way Sylvia declared they were having an open marriage and that the discussion was over was appalling. It's satisfying to see the arrogant entitled bitch suffer as she realises just how badly she fucked up.

Eh, he should take the 50-50. Had no problem going and cashing in on the open marriage shortly after relenting, so not much moral high ground here.

Once more. It’s nice to have a revenge fuck waiting for you that quickly.