The 3 'C's' of life Ch. 01

My lips found hers. I never get tired of nibbling on her soft lips. Running my tongue along her bottom lip. Pulling on her bottom lip with my own. Probing her mouth. Our tongues dancing, intertwining, like two serpents as they mate. Kissing the line from her ear to her shoulder and then across to the base of her neck, brought soft purring and cooing sounds of contentment. Terri's fingers gently combing through my hair.

The moment my tongue made contact with her left engorged nipple, Terri sucked in a lungful of air, gasped, and pulled me into her soft bosom. Cradling me, as I suckled the hardening pink gumdrop that grew in my warm mouth. Switching, Terri hurriedly fed me her awaiting, and needy right nipple. My thumb and index finger rolling the slickened nipple, I had just left, between them, as sounds of contentment filled my little bedroom.

With occasional encouragement, "Oh Bill. That feels so good. Just the way I like it. Just the way that you know I like it," I knew I was on the right path.

Leaving her highly stimulated nipples, Terri let out an impatient sigh.

"Trust me, my dearest Terri. We'e only getting started."

"I trust you. Always have... Always will," as she softly kisses the top of my head.

My tongue left a wet trail down her smooth tummy. Stopping to probe that little 'inny' bellybutton. Terri giggled.

"Ticklish?"

"I guess. Never knew that."

"Let me see if I can find more surprises."

I kissed the center of her blonde forest that covered her 'Garden of Eden', before moving to nibble on the soft, and tender, flesh of her silky smooth inner thigh. My nose, inches away from her blooming, fragrant, pink, and glistening rose petals. Terri's fingers constantly combing through my hair. Her soft coos of contentment warmed my heart, as I knew that she was enjoying our 'love making' as much as I was.

Kissing the center of the open rose brought a sharp intake of air, as Terri gasped. My tongue, probing her oozing opening, before plowing along her pink petals to the center of her sexual universe.

"Oh shit," she gasped as my tongue danced around her sensitive, and engorged, pearl.

Terri's legs rising off the bed, spreading wider. Her toes pointing outward, as she surrendered herself to me and all the pleasure I could give her.

Her first orgasm consumed her, as she cried out to the empty trailer. Her hands now behind my neck, pulling me into her core. My tongue continuing its dance, as orgasms two and three raced through her tiny body, one right after the other. This time, her hips rising off the bed and the veins in her neck bulged as a deep animalistic howl erupted.

"Come up here and kiss me," she panted with a need to connect at our lips.

Her kiss was frantic and needy, from a woman, still in the euphoria of bliss.

"Bill. I want you inside of me. I want to make our coupling complete. Make us one. Take me. Let me give myself to you."

Safely encased. I hovered over her awaiting body. Her eyes glowed with a need. A need to be filled with my hard cock for the first time. A need for us to couple.

"Tell me if I'm hurting you. OK?"

"You'll be fine. Come. Join with me."

My hard cock in my hand. I rubbed the lubricated head between her splayed folds, gathering more of her natural and abundant lubricant. Then, searching for that glorious opening into her warm love canal.

"There. Right there."

I slowly, and tentatively, moved my hips forward, and felt her tightness and warmth encircle the latex-sheathed head. Stopping to savor the new feeling. It was different than Terri's warm mouth. Here was a snugness. Moving forward slowly, her body willingly swallowing up my length until my hanging scrotum rested on her butt.

We each let out gasps throughout the slow, and blissful journey. Our eyes never leaving the others. I was no longer a virgin. I grinned at that thought.

"You're in me. All the way inside of me. You feel so good. So full. So deep. Nicer than I ever imagined. You look so sexy up there. My god, this feels so good. You feel so good. To feel so close to you."

"Me? I've never seen someone as sexy as you look right now," my smile going from cheek to cheek.

I leaned in and our lips met in a soul-filling kiss.

"Bill. Do it. Make love to me for the first time. For our first time."

Slowly withdrawing until just the tip of the encased glans kissed her open folds, I sat up and looked down at where we were joined. Terri, seeing what had my attention raised up to stare at our joining. We each looked at each other and grinned, as her head plopped back onto the pillow.

I watched, with delight, how the expressions on her face changed as I slowly moved in and out of her. A far-off dreamy look, as I slowly withdrew. Followed by a look of elation and awe, as I slowly refilled her. I slowly made love to Terri. Not going any faster. Not wanting our coupling to come to an end. But, nature, and eons of time, of men and women mating, took over.

"Terri. I'm going to cum."

"Yes. Cum for me. Look at me when you cum. I want to watch you finish. I want to feel you finish inside of me for your first time. For our first time."

I pressed myself deep into her molten core. My balls pulled up and began to spasm as I emptied myself... and emptied myself... and emptied myself. All the time our eyes boring into each other. Terri, with a gentle smile, as she felt me throb inside of her at my releases, for the first time.

I collapsed. Terri wrapping her arms and legs around me in our cocoon. The words, "I love you" were on the tip of my tongue; but, didn't come out. Don't know why. Just didn't. Maybe my subconscious had taken over and knew it was too early in our young relationship, for such a deep and heartfelt expression. Perhaps, my subconscious knew something that I didn't. Time would tell.

We did use the rest of the condoms, over the next couple of weeks, saving the last for the morning that we departed North, at the end of finals.

.........................................

Terri's mom had put together a casual dinner when we arrived. Terri sat next to me. I'm sure her mom picked up on our new 'connection' since she had last seen us together. She never gave me a warm smile. It was 'friendly' and that was about all I could say about it. Something was brewing in my gut... an uneasy feeling. A feeling that I put out of my mind. It should have been a warning. But, I was so wrapped up with my deep feelings for Terri; that I chose to ignore it.

It was 10 days before Christmas. I talked to Terri the following Sunday. I promised my parents to keep the call short. The plan was for me to go in and pick her up on the 27^th. Bring her out to my parent's house and introduce this very special person to my mom and dad.

After lunch, and dinner, then I would drive her home and get home myself home around 11:00. Coming out before Christmas, was out of the question. My mom would be busy making Christmas cookies and candy and getting ready for Christmas Day dinner. I would then pick up Terri the day after New Year's Day and head South.

Unknowingly, those last few days before we went back would change my life.

My mom welcomed Terri with open arms and a warm smile. My dad was still at work. I could see Terri taking in the small size of my parent's kitchen, dining, and living area. I couldn't tell what she was thinking, as her face was expressionless.

A little history. It was a small three bedroom house that sat on 40 acres of land. My dad had always wanted a small 'hobby farm'. We moved there, from a house that he built before they were married, which was a decent sized house, at the beginning of my senior year in high school. He thinks that this house was built around the turn of the century. It had a small dirt floor in the 'dug-out 'basement that had only had the furnace and hot water heater. He had plans to do something, just didn't know what... remodel, or tear it down and start over. So, the size never bothered me, as I knew whatever he was going to do would be great, and that this was just temporary.

My mom made a simple lunch: leftover hot turkey sandwiches, stuffing, cranberries, and of course apple pie with ice cream and sharp cheddar cheese. The last was a new thing for Terri, which she relished. Terri talked openly and cheerfully with my mom. At times, I saw my mom give a gentle smile, as she saw 'our connection'.

I took her for a walk toward the back of the farm. We were quiet for a bit. I was just thrilled to have her here. To be with her. Her first words as we started were, "Your house is so small."

That kind of hit me. Like I said earlier, I never thought about it. I filled her in on how we got here and my dad's plans. I'm not sure it made that much of an impression. Was this the 'snobby' side of her emerging? It was something I had never seen before. If it was, I knew who she got it from. I didn't like it. The 'feeling' in my gut was growing.

Terri was quiet the rest of the afternoon during our walk and then when I gave her the two minute tour of our small dairy town and my high school. I ignored it, but...

Introductions to my dad went about the same. He welcomed her with genuine warm smile. Even being the end of December, my dad fired up the grill and we had 'home-grown' steaks. It was great.

The drive back to her house was relatively quiet. I was tempted to probe, but, decided to wait and see. I should have.

The next day, at dinner with my parents, they each said how much they really liked Terri, and said they could tell how much we were into each other and were happy for me. They didn't mention the difference in school years. I would be graduating at the end of the school year. Terri had two more years. It was something we hadn't talked about. Again, don't know why. Just never did.

Terri was quiet and somber the whole drive back to school. I chalked it up to leaving her parents and friends, which she had reconnected with over the break. She said she was tired, as she was up late talking to her mother. She fell asleep about an hour into the drive.

When we arrived, and I had finished helping get her stuff up to her room, all I got was a 'distant' hug. She said she needed to spend time getting ready for classes and then start the new quarter. I looked at her with a bewildered look. The feeling in my gut was growing.

"So, when will we get together again?"

"Bill. Give me some time. I've got things I need to think about."

"Like what? Did I do something?" my arms resting on her shoulders, trying to look into her eyes. Only, Terri was looking down at the floor.

"You didn't do anything. It's me. Please. Just give me some time."

"When?" my voice soft.

"I don't know," Terri's voice soft almost a whisper.

Tears started to well up in her eyes. I had never seen her cry. I knew that there was something deep, and troubling that was consuming her. I could feel her pulling away from me... from us. My heart began to shake at the possibilities. Why?

A week went by. Nothing. It was difficult to concentrate on my classes. Finally, I had had enough.

One evening, on my way to the library, I called her from the lobby in her dorm and said I was there to talk to her. There was long pause, before she softly said, "OK. Give me a few minutes," then the line went dead.

She came off the elevator with her winter coat on. She didn't look me in the eyes. Instead, she was looking down.

"Come on. Let's go for a short walk," her voice hushed and saddened.

For being the first part of January, it wasn't too bad out. We found a bench, not far from her dorm entrance, away from any crowd. Terri sat close to me; but, not 'close'.

We sat in quiet, for I don't know how long. Then, "Bill, this is hard for me. The hardest thing in my whole life," her voice soft, but, shaky.

I spoke the words that I didn't want to say... didn't want to hear the answer to. The answer that I feared. My gut just tightened and turned a summersault.

"You're breaking up with me. Aren't you?" my voice soft, but, cracking.

"I'm sorry. So very very sorry," the tears were coming.

"Why? You said it was nothing I did. Is that still true? Or what's wrong? We can fix it."

Pause. Taking a deep sigh.

"No. It's nothing you did, except fall in love with me and me falling in love with you, even though we never said it. It still happened. And, no. It's not something that we can fix. I'm so sorry. You don't deserve this. Any of this," Terri's voice cracking on those last three words.

"Right now, I hate my mother," she screamed into the cold night as she brought her hands to her face and broke down into deep sobs.

All of a sudden, the light went on... her mother... her snobby... elitist... socialite mother... I wasn't good enough for her daughter. I was certain, that she had asked Terri, after her visit to my parents, what it was like. What my parents were like, and everything else. I'm sure that all she could see then, was another reason why we shouldn't be together. Me, a humble engineer. My parents. My home. My loving warm and cozy home. Not a sterile, cold mansion that was only there to impress others.

"Terri, you just talked of the love we have. Yes, it hasn't been said; but, like you said... It's there. It's here, in my heart. In our hearts. I know it," my voice still soft. Still hoping that this could be fixed. That I could bring her back.

"I know," she sniffled wiping away more tears.

We sat there in the quiet of the dark cold night. I was getting fed up. My anger building, for the first time. My voice hardening. It was a side of me that I didn't know existed.

"Are you going to let your mother control your life?"

Pausing. I tried to get her to look at me; but, she kept her head down... staring at the cold ground.

"So, in her eyes, I'm not good enough for you. My home does not measure up. My hard working; God loving parents don't measure up to her social standards? That fucking bitch," I yelled out into the cold night.

"Bill. Please. Please don't. That doesn't help."

"What we shared four weeks ago doesn't matter now, does it?" my tone now, harsh. I didn't care. I wasn't trying to hurt her back. I was just mad as hell at both of them.

"That we lovingly and tenderly gave ourselves to each other... our bodies... our hearts... our souls. That we gave each other a gift. A gift that can only be given once. None of that matters now, does it?" I asked again, harsher.

"Please don't."

"What do you mean... 'Please don't'?" my hands going up in quotes. My voice becoming more strained... my boiling anger about to erupt.

"Terri, you're sitting there breaking my heart into a million pieces and all you can say is 'Please don't'?"

This time I spat the words out. My voice was filled with venom.

Terri was openly sobbing. I was on the verge. I couldn't see, as my eyes were flooded. Tears were now running down my cheeks. My heart was being torn from my chest right in front of me and there was nothing I could do to stop it. How could somebody do such a thing? To a person they barely knew; but, that their daughter was in love with.

"So, you agree with your mother? Agree about me? Agree about my family? My family who welcomed you into their home with open arms?"

I was becoming more incensed with anger. With hurt.

There was silence for a few moments, and then I said, "You know Terri, there are moms in this world, and then there are mothers. They are completely different... complete opposites. A mom is loving and caring. Wants the best for her children. Wants them to be happy with life.... I have a mom.... I'll let you figure out what you're stuck with."

Letting out a deep exasperated sigh.

"God Terri, have some balls!!," my voice tired and frustrated.

"You know what hurts more than you dumping me, is knowing that you're not willing to fight for what you want. If you're not wanting to fight, don't sit there and cry for what you're about to lose."

She didn't say anything. All I heard were her deep sobs.

"Terri, I used to think of you, as someone who would never hurt me. I guess I was wrong."

Taking a deep 'cleansing' breath, "If I get up, and walk away right now. I'll never, ever be back. If you could do this to me... to us. It shows me where your real devotion is. And that you are as hung up on status as your fucking mother".

Quiet, except for more of Terri's sobs. Nothing... I had my answer.

Standing and turning. Her face, still buried in her hands. Her shoulders heaving.

"Terri, maybe this is a blessing. I'm seeing the real you. And what I see, right now... turns my stomach. Terri, I'm not going to miss this Terri... I'm going to miss the person that I thought you were," silence, except for her sobs, "Have a nice life. Goodbye."

I drove around, aimlessly, for maybe an hour on dark country roads. My mind numb. Lost. Empty.

I found myself parking next to the campus lake. I didn't remember how I got there. Finding a bench, I looked out into the cold dark night. The moon lighting up the still water. Reality finally hitting me like a freight train. I was truly alone. I sobbed. Sobbed like a baby, until nothing was left inside of me. My sides ached. My heart crumbling. I had never felt pain like this... deep... deep heartache.

I needed to talk to somebody. I wasn't close enough with my roommates to discuss something like this... something this personal. My parents. They said I could call anytime, collect. It was only 9:00.

"Collect call from Bill. Will you accept the charges?"

"Yes, of course. Bill, are you OK?" my mom frantic with worry, as I had never called during the week.

I had pulled the corded phone into the bathroom, shut and locked the door for privacy.

"She broke up with me," my voice cracking and the tears coming back that I thought were drained from my body.

"She did what? Why? Did she say why?"

"I didn't know there were people like that in this world."

"Like who? What happened?"

"Her mother."

I went through the whole thing. While Terri never admitted to it, she never denied anything I said.

"So, are you going to try to get back together? She seemed like such a nice girl, and we both could tell that you two had something going."

"I don't think so. I could never forgive her for breaking my heart. I could never stand to be in the same room as her mother, after all of this. I think I just want to pour myself into my classes, get through the the next quarter, graduate and get the hell out of here. Never to return. Too many memories... bad memories."

"I think that's best," she said in her motherly voice.

Her final thoughts, as my mom, "Bill, sometimes when the people you love, hurt you the most, it's better to just stay quiet. Let her go. Because if your love for her wasn't enough... then, I don't think that your words will matter."

"Thanks mom. That means a lot... I know it's late for you. Sorry it's such a long call."

"Don't be. You know you can call any time that you want to talk. That's what we're here for. Love you son."

"Love you mom. Give my love to Dad," my voice tired.

"Will do. Take care. It'll take time. In this case, I'm afraid, a lot of time. But, you'll make it. You'll be in our prayers."

And that's what I did. I changed my normal place of study from the library to a quiet and 'out-of-the-way' spot in the Student Center.

The first few days, it was difficult to concentrate, to get her out of my mind; but, as time went on, my classes won me over. I studied, like I had never studied before. It was my escape. The next two quarters I think I had the highest grade-point average of my whole time at school.