The 5 Stages of... Submission?

NOTE: 18+/Mature Content-This is entirely a work of fiction and makes no reference to real people. Any similarities are purely coincidental. This story includes rather depraved facesitting and other sexual acts so if that's not your thing, please move on. All characters involved are over the age of 21 and are consenting at all times. Please leave any comments, feedback, or just your thoughts! Follow to stay updated on any new installments in this series: Nila's New Life (or other content :).

.............................................................................................................................................................

The sound of birds chirping and morning light pouring in through the gaps between the dark blue curtains of my new room awoke me from my deep sleep. Well, it would have, but Mistress beat them to it. Instead of a gentle start to my day, I was awoken abruptly as my air supply was cut off. As I gained consciousness, I realized I couldn't inhale and felt my face being smothered by smooth, soft, and supple skin. This time Mistress had begun as she did when I first began my servitude yesterday--with my face buried in her ass and my nose smushed against her asshole.

By now, I had become slightly more accustomed to being a seat and less terrified. I know that even though I had just met Mistress yesterday, I could trust that she has no intent to cause me harm. I know that she would always let up so that I could breathe...eventually. I know that while she will treat me like her seat as our agreement stipulated, Mistress knows that I am a person and only treats me as such because I consent to it. As she sat on her seat once again, I found my mind straying and relishing in the memories of yesterday.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Yesterday, I had passed out while Mistress rode my face as punishment for my misbehaviour. She has every right to punish me as she sees fit, and my lack of oxygen did not last much longer after I drifted away. Rich in her generosity, Mistress let go of my nose and allowed me to breathe and come back to consciousness so that I could finish my duty of pleasing her until orgasm. After such a brutal first experience as a seat, she finished using my face rather gently and gave me plenty of breaks to breathe. Mistress grinded herself against my face, gripping my hair for more control. I felt her slick pussy being smushed against my features. She loved to run my nose down the length of her slit and to massage her dripping clit with it. The contrast between her initially domineering and indifferent demeanor and seemingly gentle and caring actions made my heart race. I found myself wetter than ever, and wanted to do something to release the build-up but was far too exhausted.

Once Mistress finished on my face, she watched me as I licked her clean, and tucked me into bed where I almost instantly fell asleep. My slumber was so deep after a day that was more physically demanding than I had ever experienced, that I can't even remember dreaming.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My mind was brought back to the present as Mistress sat up and let me breathe. Though she quickly sat back down, not on my face luckily, but on my chest. Mistress had reached back to support herself so I was no longer suffocated, but the remaining weight of her ass on my chest and thighs concealing my neck was enough to make breathing very difficult.

"My pet you are so incredibly lucky to get the privilege of being awoken by your Mistress' ass on your face. I'm curious, how are you enjoying being my seat? Is it everything you wished for when you first reached out to me? Are you still satisfied with our agreement?"

After catching my breath I finally processed what Mistress was asking of me. This was my chance to get out of my 4-week commitment of being another person's object.

STAGE 1: Denial

"How could I have been so stupid, so depraved, so fucking short-sighted to have signed my life away AS A SEAT OF ALL THINGS?" I yelled with all my heart...to myself...in my head...and silently, of course. I don't want to be a submissive, I just wanted to live out my insane fantasy of being facesat. I was impulsive and high on the adrenaline rush from taking a risk in my life otherwise guarded by a safety net I wove for myself.

A fantasy of facesitting is a far cry from wanting to be contractually obligated to endure domination as someone's seat. Right? You agree with me, don't you? Regardless, I've made up my mind, and I definitely don't want to be Mistre--Helena's facesitting pet anymore. The only thing I desire now is to go back home and relish in the comfortable life I built. Oh my gosh, I just realized that I'm not wet or even a little aroused right now. Clearly, I have fulfilled my desires and this choice was just a momentary lapse in judgement.

I couldn't be more sure of myself.

Right?

"PET! Where did you go? I am waiting for a response and my patience is running thin...maybe I should put you back where you belong..."

"No! Mistress, I am sorry for making you wait, truly. Please let me answer your questions, I owe it to my Mistress", I pleaded desperately. Breathing, let alone talking, caused me to strain against her weight for air.

"Fine, go ahead, I'm listening." she huffed as she rolled her eyes.

"Mistress, I am so grateful to be your seat and to have you sit on my face, smother me with your ass, make me breathe through you, and even to drink from you. It's a privilege. To answer your second question, yes, it was everything I wished for when I *first* reached out to you. Unfortunately, I am no longer okay with our arrangement. It was an impulsive decision and I want to leave. I don't want to endure this humiliation any more, please let me go. I'm so sorry to do this."

This took every last ounce of air from my lungs to say and left me heaving and slightly light-headed. Still sitting on top of me, Mistress looked down, gazing thoughtfully and deep into my eyes. She then moved her arms from supporting her weight and sat herself completely on my neck and chest. Mistress crossed her arms and was taping her fingers rhythmically as she considered my response. Her full-weight was crushing and I could barely get a breathe in as her bare ass and pussy bore down on me. I could feel her arousal still oozing out of her and dripping down to my neck.

After a minute or so, she finally had an answer for me.

"Alright, Nila, I understand."

YES! YES! YES! It felt as though a blanket of relief suddenly covered me and I felt like I could breathe again. I mean, I couldn't literally breathe easily as Helena was still on me, but figuratively I was essentially free.

"I know that you signed our contract, but I have no interest in forcing you into something you aren't comfortable with. It's unfortunate, I was having such a great time playing with you. Honestly, you surprised me and it was like your face was made to be under me. I'm going to get up now, unless you have changed your mind?"

"No, I'm sure of this." I said with my last breathe. Helena immediately got off of my chest in one swift and controlled movement. She swung her left leg over and off of me and moved to lay down next to me on the bed. Helena slowly turned her head to look at me and as I stared into her sparkling brown eyes. Her gaze was one of longing but also understanding. Upon reflection, I am quite lucky that the stranger I pledged myself to was not insane and listened to my wishes.

"What now?" I whispered.

Helena responded in the same soft and smooth voice that managed to lack neither authority nor strength when I first met her in Cafe Verde.

"Well, Nila our time together has been exhilarating. You are of course free to leave whenever you'd like. I know we had planned for you to stay here for the next 4 weeks, and you likely don't have other arrangements, so take the time you need to get yourself sorted. While I respect your wishes, I can't hide my own desires. If you ever in the future change your mind, or want to try this again, even if just for one night, you know how to contact me."

I pressed my lips together and then gave Helena a smile. I was honestly grateful for the experience and that she had been so generous. As nice as her offer was, I knew my wishes and it was clear that I wanted to leave.

"Helena, thank you so much. You've been so kind--more so while you weren't using me as a seat and smothering my face. I think I'm just going to get dressed and leave. I just have one favour to ask...can you please drop me back at the airport. I'll try to find a last-minute ticket home."

"Oh, yes it's the least I could do. Just so we're on the same page, I won't be sitting on your face for this car ride...unless you want me to?", she replied hesitantly.

I laughed at this, "Thank you, and I think I'll be fine to sit on my own in the passenger seat."

Before I knew it, I had found a ticket taking me back to my state and Helena was ready for us to leave.

As we walked to the front door, I took one last look at her exquisite mansion and let out a sigh of relief. This definitely felt right, I am not meant to be a submissive.

This time around, I wasn't crawling on my hands and aching knees and could admire the foyer in it's beauty as we left and stepped outside. Helena graciously opened the passenger door for me before closing it once I got in and walking around to the driver's side. All of my luggage was already in the car as I never took it out. She put the keys in the ignition, started the car, and we drove off to the airport. It was a quiet but relaxing ride, the complete opposite of my arrival.

STAGE 2: Anger

It took us roughly 40 minutes to reach the airport and I had said my goodbyes to Helena. I felt a fleeting wave of sadness, the kind that you get when you leave your first job, finish high school, or have to say goodbye to an old friend. At the same time, it felt almost cathartic, as if I was also saying goodbye to my sexual fantasy. Feeling anew and cleansed of my depraved thoughts and impulses of the past, I stepped into my new future. It was one informed by my mistakes and even more secure than before.

I walked through the airport and went about all the typical pre-flight activities. Soon, it was time for me to get out my boarding pass with only 5 people in line in front of me. I reached into my bag to grab it and let out a deep breath. "How lovely is it to breathe freely?!" I thought to myself. However, instead of the release and relaxation I had been feeling since quitting my role as a seat, I felt a knot growing in my chest. Tension began to flow throughout my body and a lump in my throat formed. I could feel the thud of my heart beating in my chest and hear the lub-dub pounding in my ears.

I was suddenly unbelievably agitated and frustrated. What was I thinking?

I breathed heavily and my eyebrows began to furrow slightly as I questioned and argued with myself. In my haste, I had completely forgotten that I had QUIT MY JOB AND ONLY SOURCE OF INCOME before flying to Florida. WHAT THE FUCK WAS I THINKING??

The other side of me reasoned that this wasn't necessarily a mistake but key in ensuring that I followed through on my journey instead of wimping out. Unfortunately, this also meant that I was going back to a mess of a life that was no longer secured by my safety net. I had shattered the shield keeping me safe, I would have to either beg for my old job or spend who knows how long trying to find another. I had no one else to blame but myself and was doing exactly that.

I was fuming, and there were now 4 people ahead of me. What was all of that about not wanting to be Helena's seat? Did I really mean it?

Well, I did, in the moment.

"But why?"

Still furious, I thought for a moment and realized that I was doing what I always do. It wasn't that I necessarily wasn't meant to be Helena's facesitting pet, but that I was more frightened about the long-term risk of ruining my perfect world. If I committed to 4 weeks of being a seat, how could I be sure that it won't turn into 4 months? A year? Even more?

3 people until my turn now.

Evidently, I had ruined my perfect world the moment I quit my job and chose facesitting over my livelihood. This was objectively the most ridiculous thing I'd done but I can't go back now. Instead, I need to accept my rage and actions to decide wholeheartedly what I really want.

2 more.

"Okay, Nila, calm down. You need to think straight and decide with confidence what you need to do."

STAGE 3: Bargaining

"If I swear to stay on a path of goodness, consistency, and self-preservation, I will be able to go back to my old life. I promise myself that I won't ever let my deep desires get in the way of my personal security"

"That's absurd. I don't want a boring life of nothing anymore. I promise myself to allow fulfilment and risk taking. If I let myself go back to Helena, I swear that I will never forget my sexual desires and let them be drowned out by fear"

"Nila, you want self-preservation, but are you truly yourself if you're ignoring a part of your character? You know that in your heart, you want to be facesat, to be smothered and used. You want to have your nose shoved up an asshole and to be forced to breathe through that asshole."

"That's not true!"

I felt like my head was spinning as every possible internal dialogue of mine was playing on a cursed loop of chaos.

"Nila, you know this is true."

"No, it's not. I don't want my nose shoved up an asshole. I don't want to be facesat by some person keen on dominating me. I want Helena."

I realized that before meeting her, my fantasy was vague in who I would be submitting to. But now, after experiencing her glorious domination, I needed to be with Helena again. I needed to be under her again. I wanted to be dominated by Mistress and Mistress alone.

One.

Just one person until I presented my boarding pass. This internal bickering was almost as bad as choking down Mistress' piss with my air cut off. Almost.

Zero.

I knew what I had to do now, and this time I was completely sure of myself.

Stage 4: Depression, or more accurately, Sadness

I ran.

Instead of presenting my boarding pass, I ran away through the airport. My heart rate was sky rocketing because of my newfound surge of energy and purpose--also because I honestly never run. Dear god, I need to get into shape this was ridiculous. I was panting as if someone was sitting on my chest.

Nevertheless, I was no longer anxious or frightened. I ran with purpose.

Once I exited the airport, I hailed a taxi and my luck was unbelievable. It was my taxi driver from yesterday! We recognized each other instantly and laughed together about the coincidence. "Miss, I did not expect to see you again, especially not so soon. Are you just coming in from another flight already?", he questioned. I did my best to quickly explain what happened with the least amount of specific details. To the knowledge of my lovely driver, I had an argument with my partner who I was visiting and was about to leave but decided at the last minute to turn back.

"Ahh, love conquers all. It's corny but true! I'm assuming we are heading to the same address as before then? Cafe Verde?"

"Yes, exactly. Thank you so much!"

I placed my luggage on the adjacent seat before getting in and shutting the door. I had caught my breathe, finally, and was mentally clear unlike before.

Fortunately, there was no accident this time and we arrived within 30 minutes. After thanking my driver once again and paying the fare, I walked briskly into the cafe knowing exactly what I wanted. However, I was interrupted rather rudely by a gurgling sound. My own stomach was distracting me but I realized that I hadn't eaten since yesterday before my flight. Unless you count drinking Mistress' piss. I grabbed a sandwich and soy latte that I scarfed down not even 10 minutes after finding a booth. I hadn't realized how ravenous I was and this meal was heavenly.

I now had to tackle the problem that was finding my Mistress. I didn't get to see the way to her place yesterday as she sat on my face the entire car ride. Unfortunately, I was too preoccupied to even notice her house number or street name when we left, and my head was in the clouds of denial during that ride.

Shit.

A wave of sadness came over me and I felt my heart sink. I felt like such a failure because not only had I given up my previous life, but I possibly threw away the only future I needed. I shut my eyes as tears flowed uncontrollably and I savoured the delicious memories of my time with my Mistress. Fleeting images of her sweat-covered asshole approaching my nose, her wet pussy lowering onto my face, and the glorious sight of looking up to Mistress while she sat on me flashed in my mind. How could I have let her go? It was like my whole world had fallen apart and I was helpless to the consequences of my actions. I could almost taste her deliciously sour piss trickling down my throat.

I got up to throw my meal wrapper and cup away feeling discouraged and defeated, longing to find Mistress. As I was walking out, I took a scan of the restaurant in the off chance that she was here again. How incredibly luck can I be? I spotted Mistress seated exactly where I found her on day 1 and she was looking right at me. We locked eyes and she grinned at me, looking quite satisfied with herself. I strutted over to her booth and took a seat across from her. The only thing that could have made this moment even more right would be if Mistress took her rightful place on my face once again. Her hair look golden under the rays of sunshine pouring in through the floor-to-ceiling windows. Mistress' eyes sparkled with hope and she looked radiant. She was wearing what seemed like gym clothes; a black, long-sleeved quarter zip, and some matching flared leggings.

Stage 5: Acceptance

"I was wondering how long it was going to take you to notice me here." she said with a grin. "I like to come here after my workouts to decompress and get some work done. Now, I didn't know if you would come back, but something told me you might. There is no pressure, but I have drafted a new contract for you, my pet"

I was riddled with excitement that extended all the way down to between my legs. I felt my own arousal and throbbing and could barely contain myself in anticipation of committing to Mistress once again.

"This isn't legally binding, for obvious reasons. However, I know that you also value the sanctity of a contract, a promise, a commitment. My pet, my original 4-week offer has expired. If you choose to submit yourself to me again, know that I will be punishing you for breaking your promise to me as my seat. Thus, the new agreement states that your commitment will be indefinite. I am wealthy enough to take care of any financial concerns that may be preventing you from taking your rightful place beneath me. Also, there is a cancellation clause where if you break your role again, I am entitled to 30 minutes of a fitting punishment of my choosing."

Again, this was a big decision for me. Luckily, I now had little to ponder over and grabbed the pen and contract from Mistress' side of the table, hastily flipped to the last page, and signed.

"Mistress, thank you so much for allowing me to resume my only purpose of serving you using my face as your seat. I want to mention that I feel like I need to keep my apartment in case of anything. I no longer have a job, and as your facesitting pet I cannot earn money. Are you sure you can cover these expenses for me?"

"Of course, seat, you have nothing to worry about except worshipping and pleasing me from hereon. You know the drill, lets go home."