The Awakening

After graduating high school I wanted to become an interior designer so having had a 4.0 GPA throughout school and I went to college on a scholarship program. My parents were also well off so money wasn't a problem. My name is Danielle but my friends call me Darby, I was twenty years old, five feet seven inches tall, one hundred twenty-five to one hundred thirty pounds, dusty blonde shoulder-length hair, powder blue eyes, and C cup breasts when it happened.

I was walking to my car from my last class in a building four blocks away, it was late at night and the parking lot was mostly deserted except for a couple of cars and an old, small, derelict motor home. I don't know where he came from but suddenly a man was behind me with one arm around my waist and the other over my mouth. He growled in my ear, "Be quiet and don't fight me or I'll gut you." I looked down to see a shiny knife in his hand around my waist.

He forced me to and into the old motor home and closed the door. He warned me again not to scream or he would cut my throat. I was terrified as he pulled me back, deeper into the old relic and pushed me down on the old smelly bed in the back. There was a faint light coming in from outside but not enough for me to see his face which was half-covered, anyway. I begged him over and over to please not kill me, not to hurt me and he said he wouldn't if I did what he said and didn't scream. I promised I wouldn't.

He wore a mask that covered the top half of his face, one of those clear plastic ones that distorted his looks. "I'm going to fuck you so just get that in your head and you will be better off." He growled in my ear.

"Please don't," I begged. "I haven't been... I never did...Please don't, please let me go." I pleaded but he was unaffected. He unzipped his pants and took his cock out and stuck it to my mouth. It looked huge as he told me to open and he forced it into my mouth. He began thrusting in and out of my mouth going down my throat and making me gag.

He pulled out and told me to, "Just shut up and you won't get hurt." He started kissing me, sticking his tongue in my mouth and I almost puked. While he did this he was using his right hand to push my sweater up under my chin and used his knife to cut my bra apart in the middle exposing my breasts. His mouth moved down to my breasts kissing them and sucking and nibbling on my nipples, not hurting me, almost as if he were making love to me.

I had never had sex before but I had masturbated to some videos on my computer wondering what a man would feel like doing those things to me, sucking on him, feeling him penetrate me. Now I was going to find out but not how I wanted. His left hand drifted down over my body as he told me what a hot body I had, it went up under my skirt and rubbed my pussy through my panties.

I felt my body tensing up, getting excited, betraying me as I could feel myself get wet when his hand went down inside my panties and fingered me. His fingers found my clit now hard from his fondling and jammed inside me his fingers searching, probing. He didn't hit me or try to hurt me on purpose but he was rough as though I was a street whore or something even calling me a bitch and slut a few times.

So just why my body had an orgasm I didn't know except that I later learned it wasn't unusual. He brandished his knife again at my face then he pulled my skirt off after cutting the waistband, cut my panties off and slid down to put his face between my thighs and began licking and sucking on me.

First, he sucked my clit remarking how big it was, sucking my labia and tonguing me. He knelt up and undid his pants and slid them down. He was going to do it, go inside me and I begged him to stop but he slapped me and said to shut up. His cock was hard and looked huge, I felt it touch me as he shoved it in roughly and I let out a yelp when it hurt.

He thrust inside me repeatedly. At first, it really hurt but the more he thrust in and out the more it began to feel good and all I could think of is how my body was betraying me again. To my horror, I realized I was moving against him, in rhythm with him clutching at him with my hands as my body and mind gave way to ecstasy and orgasm. OMG, he had taken my virginity, my dignity my feeling of self-worth and my body was betraying me and orgasming!

He pumped me for a long time until my hips felt numb and then he came up and put his cock in my face and told me to open my mouth. It was as large as a cucumber and he put some in my mouth as he stroked himself and I felt his cum squirt in my mouth and on my lips and face. It was kind of salty-sweet, warm and creamy and he brandished his knife again and told me to swallow it. He quickly got his pants back up as he told me not to move for 5 minutes after he left or he would come back and kill me.

I don't know how long I lay there feeling like I could not move even if wanted to. When at last I moved my hips were sore and stiff but I could finally put myself together as best I could. The old motor home smelled like grease and mold and garbage and I finally made it out to the fresh night air again.

I made my way to my car and drove myself to the hospital where I also called the police. The nurses and doctors examined me, did a rape kit and treated me for pregnancy and STI's. The police questioned me and I gave them as good a description as I could and they said they would check out the old motor home. The doctors said that other than vaginal trauma there were no other signs of rape so the police asked if this was just a case of buyer's remorse. I was angry and reiterated again what had happened, how he threatened me and everything. It was close to daylight by the time I got back home and I fell into bed exhausted.

OMG, how can I be raped again by the same guy? I can feel his cock, smell him and taste his cum. HELP! HELP someone save me HELP! Suddenly I was looking at my own ceiling as daylight was streaming through the sides of my window blinds. The crotch of my PJ's were soaked and my right hand was wet and my whole body was bathed in sweat. As I lay there, I could still sense him inside me and taste his cum on my lips.

I kept licking my lips as if trying to get more taste and my hips were undulating slightly. I looked at my clock, 11:14 as I was still trying to clear my head. I began to realize that I was dreaming about the rape all over again but I was enjoying the feel of his cock, how big it was and how his cum tasted. I lay back as I began to finger myself thinking of how his cock felt and suddenly came to my senses and got up to run to the shower. 'What was I thinking? What was I doing?' I stood in the shower a long time washing three times trying to feel clean once again.

Three months passed and I hadn't told anyone else save my BFF who gave me more sympathy than I wanted or needed but she was trying to help. But I put it all behind me and went on with my life; I wasn't going to let the experience ruin how I lived. I did, however, get campus security to walk me to my car for the rest of the semester after which I switched classes to all days.

I had just begun dating and felt that since I had been deflowered I let two different men have me but they were unexciting. They were nice and gentle but I just wasn't satisfied like I heard other girls talk about sex was supposed to be like. Two more months went by and a train of men I let have me but none satisfied me or even made me cum, I had to do that at home with my fingers and toys.

Mom always told me I was quiet and unpretentious, compliant and had a big heart. This is likely what saved me during the rape. I was always sad for hurt animals and tried to help them. I stuck pretty much to myself in school and never railed back at those who teased and taunted me; I just kept to my studies and ignored them. My girlfriend said I'm the perfect submissive. I learned there's a lot of information online about what a submissive is and reading that led to watching porn about submissive women and other sex.

I was mesmerized at Black men and how White women loved to have sex with them, how submissive they were. But what excited me most was rough sex and BDSM. I didn't know why but watching some of those videos made me soaking wet and jilling like a fiend. These men were pounding these women hard with their big cocks and they were loving it. I saw women getting their breasts slapped and whipped, nipples pinched and twisted. I even saw one white woman licking a Black man's ass and loving it. At first, it was like EEW until I realized they were clean so I watched it a number of times more and began to get turned on at how they both liked it.

I thought about the men I had dated, nice men, quiet men but actually the ones that I liked were more dominant. I looked at my wardrobe, pretty tame and conservative. I needed some other clothes, nightclothes, sexy clothes so I went shopping and came home with bags and boxes of sexy dresses, skirts, short skirts, and revealing tops. I even bought some new trending lipstick and nail polish.

This was all so outside of my comfort zone and I thought it was just what I needed. I tried everything on trying different combinations of tops and how much cleavage to show. Some were made to show my new lace bras I bought including open tip bras and demi-cup bras that made me look braless. I do have nice looking tits so I may as well put them to use.

I almost felt naughty in the new skirts but it was a good feeling. Look out people there's a new woman coming out tonight! Unfortunately by the time, the next day's classes were over my bravado had gone south and I was home watching TV. It took two more weeks to find myself again and I went out to a bar I had been to a couple of times.

White squared scoop top, gold jacket and black patent leather mini-skirt caught some attention as did I'm sure, my cleavage showing a good portion of my tits. I was totally out of my element but I was also determined so the first two guys, nice guys who hit on me I rejected. I wanted an alpha man, a dominant man, one who knows what he wants and here he was grabbing my hand and saying this is our dance as he ushered me out on the dance floor.

I would tell you his name but it was too long ago to remember...if I ever knew it. I do know we danced a couple of dances and talked and back at the bar he suggested we go to his place and have some fun.

"What kind of fun?"

"Oh, I'm sure we can think of something fun, let's go."

"My car's in the parking lot how far away are you?" I asked.

"We can take mine and I'll bring you back."

"No, we'll take mine and I'll bring you back." He agreed so off we went.

I wasn't naïve, I knew what he wanted and I hoped, at last, he was what I wanted.

We arrived at his apartment, newer, nicely furnished and clean. He poured me some wine and came up behind me and put his arms around me cupping my tits in his hands and firmly squeezing. I gently twisted away, "What are you doing?" I asked coyly picking up a wine glass and sipping from it. He had held me close on the dance floor and I could feel his manhood getting hard. He was good looking with a nice toned body.

"I thought you wanted to have some fun?"

"I do what makes you think I don't?"

"You pushed me away."

"And that's all you got? A little rejection and you're done?"

"What kind of game are you playing?"

"No game, if you want something take it...or I can take you back to your car."

"Why you little cunt, I'll show you how I take it."

He stepped to me, grabbed me by my hair and pushed me to his bedroom and pulled me to my knees beside his bed. My pulse was racing and my chest was heaving with excited anxiety. His pants were suddenly off and his big hard cock pointing at my face as he grabbed me by my hair again and ordered me to suck him.

I put the head of his dick in my mouth and knelt there not moving. "You little fuck, if you won't suck it I'll fuck your face." And with that, he began doing exactly that as he held me in place by my hair. My heart was racing as his cock went in and out, down my throat and out again. I loved the taste and feel of it, his balls hitting my chin and my nose buried in his hair. I sucked one hairy ball then the other and back again before getting him to fuck my mouth again. He all but stripped my clothes off and I had to slow him down so he didn't rip them off.

"I'd spank that cunt of yours but you'd never feel it with all that hair.

Why are you so hairy when so many girls are shaving it off?"

"Why," I asked.

"It looks better and feels better they say and it's easier to keep clean too."

"Well nothing to do about it now, it is what it is."

"Not necessarily." He said, as he went to his closet and came back with a big smile on his face and a small box that contained clippers.

"You're kidding."

"No, I'm not really. First, we use the clippers then my shaver and you'll be nice and smooth. You'll like it."

"You want me to shave here, now, just to see how I like it."

"Sure why not before you think about it too much." I thought I must be crazy but so is fucking a guy I don't know so what the hey why not!

We went into the bathroom where he knelt down and turned on the clippers and shaved off all my hair he could. Then he had me get in the shower and shave myself smooth with his razor. He gave me a little aloe gel to rub in after I dried off to cool the razor burn. His cock was still hard and he said I should suck it and I said, "Why don't you make me?" He grabbed my head and plunged it down on his cock and it went straight down my throat.

"Damn you have a nice throat!" He said as he fucked it for a couple of minutes."

He stopped and stood up to inspect my pussy.

"Hot damn you have a beautiful pussy. I love how your clit sticks out like that. Please keep shaved, it's too beautiful to hide, all pussies are but yours is on top for real!"

"Well if you want it take it now or lose it forever." I teased.

He took me to the bedroom and shoved me on the bed. He rolled me up so my legs were on his shoulders and sunk his cock deep inside me and fucked me hard.

"I'll fuck you, you little bitch, I'll fuck you like a whore!"

"Ya? Do it you bastard, fuck me hard, fuck me like you mean it." I said clutching at his ass and digging my fingernails in.

Rolled up, missionary, on my side then the other side, doggie, and cowgirl then back to missionary he fucked me and I was cuming, OMG I was cuming so hard it almost hurt. I just kept cuming and squirting I couldn't believe it. How his neighbors didn't call the police thinking someone was being beaten to death I don't know the way I was screaming in ecstasy.

I told him not to cum inside me just in my mouth and I loved how it felt squirting and flowing in, so warm and creamy, so salty-sweet and another taste I couldn't identify. I kept it in my mouth for a while so I could enjoy it and savor it. I flashed on my rapist and how his cum tasted, so similar.

Driving him back to the bar to get his car we were talking but I was only half paying attention. I was thinking; He wasn't bad but I still had to tell him what I wanted. I think the way things are today I think that's going to be normal.

But how can I let men know what I want when I'm not sure yet myself? I went to sleep thinking about it and woke up two minutes later. Actually it only felt like two minutes, it was almost eight hours later. Standing in the shower my mind drifted back to my rapist. Good grief, MY rapist as if he were mine. Who wants to own a rapist for chrissake? Still, I couldn't help but think back to how his cock felt in my mouth, if I'm being honest I have to say it was wonderful, so was his cum, and his cock plowing into me so hard and furiously. STOP IT! I yelled out loud; get your head back on girl!

I was such a slut letting a stranger take me to his place and fuck me. And even shave off all my pussy hair but I have to admit I liked it and it feels so sexy. A door has been opened thanks to my rapist and I went through and I like it here. I stumbled on a website with girls sucking cock at video store glory holes. I've seen the stores and knew there were back rooms and video arcades but do they really suck cock there?

I checked out some stores and read reviews and picked one and went. I asked the clerk about the booths and glory holes and he said I had to put money in the video machines to watch. He looked at me for a couple of seconds and asked if I were going to go back to suck cock and almost shyly I said I was. He said I could give him $20 and stay as long as I liked so I did.

I walked back through the curtain and down a dark narrow hallway. The booths may be able to have four people in them shoulder to shoulder but these had one chair in each with a video in the wall and I noticed two oval holes on each side. The floor felt sticky and it smelled of stale cum and the air was full of pheromones; it had to be. I sat there inhaling the smell and felt it making me excited and suddenly a hard cock comes through the hole on my left.

Why was I there? Why was I so turned on here in this men's playground? But wait it wasn't just for men, was it? I reached out and fondled his balls and leaned over and put my mouth down over his cock tasting his sweet precum on my tongue. I held my face tight to the hole and he began fucking my mouth and throat until he came. It felt so warm and creamy in my mouth and tasted good like the other cum I've had.

This was easy and kinda fun too I was thinking when another cock came through the other hole, maybe six inches, thick and curved up with a big head. I also sucked him dry as I fondled his balls; I milked his cock as I sucked the tip to get it all. As I was finishing him another one came through the other hole, a big black cock that I sucked on for a long time before he finally came.

A little over two hours I was there before I became tired and left. This was a lot of fun and I promised myself to come back again. I went to one of two different stores once a week, a few times twice to satisfy my craving for sucking cock and cum. I went out a lot trying to find what I was looking for and while I found men to fuck me, even roughly I usually had to lead them in the right direction.

Beginning my fourth year of college a few months after my first visit to the glory hole, I had become quite the attraction at the two video stores I frequented. I think the clerks posted online somewhere that I was there and in less than half an hour the place got really busy and my mouth got a lot of use. During this time I had also been online on a couple of different sites talking to various people. I had been talking in particular with this one guy, Ed, a biker with a beautiful road bike, and we were hitting it off rather nicely.

We exchanged photos and he said he is 6' 2" and 260#. He's Black, very Black like with very dark skin and nice full lips.

I just told him the day before that I loved going to video stores and being at the glory holes and had just been there the day before for about three hours sucking cock the whole time.

"Holy shit you really are a slut aren't you?"

"Didn't I say that before?" I never minded guys calling me a slut, I was after all and I liked more what it meant.

"I wouldn't mind using your mouth."

"Ya, I'm sure you wouldn't."

"I'd like to fuck you too."

"I know, a lot of guys would but I have rather exotic needs. I'm just not...well I'm not like most girls you probably meet."

"Why, do you have three tits or something?"

"LOL no, I just need certain types of men and they are in short supply."

"What kind of men do you like?"

What the hell I thought. "I like men who aren't afraid to take what they want."

"Really? I can do that."