All Comments on 'The Best Christmas Present Ever'

Really enjoyed this story, can you do a follow up with the same characters, will there be any resolution between the mom and daughter

I enjoyed that.

Somebody's got to get her ready for her anal debut scene, right? Or even better, he goes to the same school, and he does it on camera. Just spit balling some of my own perverted thoughts. I'm pretty sure whatever you do, I'll probably love it.

Nice little tale, thought the build up was okay, dialog was good. Suggest the pornstar mom might be better since the mother's reaction would stretch believability factor to much? But then this fantasy so it might just be how you work it. You did mention you want to improve your writing so getting this mother into a threesome, or the whole family into porn, could be a skill test.

Direct follow up with these characters

Please continue and surprise us with next chapter. After all it is Christmas I love surprises. Mmmmmmmmmm😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

I would love to read a follow up with the same characters. Dad didn't seem too surprised either...

Of creative flow just keep writing. A nice twist would be for the mom to bring out her VHS tapes of when she was a college student and show her kids. And well you can go from there

One idea could be that she recruits him to work with her on a couple films. She might introduce him to a co-star as a possible girlfriend. Just please avoid the whole she wants him to get her pregnant. It’s overdone and not sexy at all.

Also I would be happy to be a beta reader/editor for you.

hope you go on with this story....

Just please keep writing like this.

I’m not a big fan of the whole “my relatives a porn star” scenario.

sister get pregnate parents join in son gets also mom preganete

I loved the build-up. Would love to see a continuation.

great story; write another chapter

I loved the story, if you want to do a second chapter mom could join them to ring in the New Year.

I vote direct follow up

It was a great story, yes some errors, but nothing to make it bad. Not going to be a grammar nerd..cannot wait for next chapter...

I really liked it. I just wish the dad could’ve been more involved in the incest, I felt there were a few opportunities to do so and of course the mom too.

Is it wrong of me that I want more? I know this is a one-shot, but I want to know what happens after!

How soon before we see part 2 and 3

I am hard waiting for some serious fucking.

Definitely plenty of opportunity for follow up - family discussion on what sort of porn she's doing which leads to demonstration, mum needs that massage which leads to more etc

Will mom ever enjoy a massage from her son? And dad sample his sexy daughter?

Definitely needs a direct follow up!

Lucky him. I'm green with envy. Good yarn.

Pick up the narrative after the brother gets to (the same) college.

He needs a way to earn some extra coin, because college is really expensive!

And brother-sister incest videos can bring in some serious money...!

Do you see where I'm going here?

I'll add to the rest. Please add a direct follow-up. I want to see how the character interactions evolve as well. Keep writing!

Pity about the scene telling her parents. Didn't add to the story and didn't sound realistic. Otherwise great story.

Mom to get that massage and slammed -maybe even a 4some with parents and kids

Maybe do a pregnancy scare and a going to same college story

Lol

Well written, but I didn't quite like the premise.

I'd say continue the story from right where you left off.

Have Zach massage mom and fuck her.

I liked this very much and would like to see more on these two - especially along the lines of what keobanion0 relayed. Thank you!

An extremely Erotic story. So descriptive I could picture Jess myself. There are so many directions you can go. The others had some fine suggestions. You were so descriptive, I could picture Jess myself. Personally I would enjoy more Jess and her brother. Great writing. Thanks

It kinda sounded like dad and daughter had something going on and mom and son could find each other Iinteresting.

Yes, so damn hot and well written !! Jesds sure has learned some great skills and now has a horny well hung brother to work with. I sure hope Zack gets to screw and eat out his sister all during the Christmas break and more. Yes, we need more chapters and explicit dialog and action between brother and sister. Jess should be thrilled she has a so handsome and horny younger brother who wants to help her etc. Hopefully, Jess will bang him silly all day and teach him more. That Jess will fall in love with him too. Yes, please more with the same great details. Thanks.

I found the story, while humorous, and yes, hot in a couple of places, to be a little weak...she spilled the beans, pissed off mom, then announced she was taking bro's v-card for Christmas...

Writing didn't seem all that bad with the exception of the story development. I know that others give 5's freely, I think they should be earned.

Looking forward to your next.

Please give us more. This was very well written story and definitely 5 stars.

I vote for continuation of the story. I feel like it has too much details about blowjobs. But otherwise the story is mostly well crafted.

Dad wants to sample Jess and is going to talk mom into going along with it and have her fuck Zach while he fucks Jess. All in the family. Yes 5*****

I'd love for Zach to join Jess in college, staying together to save money.

Loved it. How adout a follow up chapter on this one and then a new story adout a pornstar mom. With the amount of porn being produced these days there must be quite a lot of women who end up having families. I think this would be a great topic to pursue.

I would have given you five stars but you need to have more follow up at the end and you also need to make sure to re-read the story and take care of the grammatical errors.

A good story so far. I'd love to see it continue.

Zach and Jess need to make a movie.

I am so hard

I gave it a five, grammar errors not a biggie, but I thought it was odd that sis just told him to go straight for the clit when he wanted to go down on her. Kinda weird actually. I guess some girls might want to get right to it I guess, but usually it's the other way around, from experience, they want their money's worth, not just the car wash, but the whole interior cleaned and detailed! Hehehe ;)

I think I would be highly conflicted though, let's say a hypocrite. I guess because while I've always loved my sister and been in love with her, definitely wanting her sweet body, mind and soul, at the same time I'm highly turned off by her fucking all these guys (honestly don't mind the girls, more hypocrite! Hehe) for money. Just the thought of all those random guys dicking her makes me not want to put mine in there as well. Watching porn helps me wind up and get off, but I really wouldn't want to fuck any of those women.

Closest I've cum to really wanting one would be Kobi Tai. Asian, check. Tiny, check. In shape, check. Actually really seems to be enjoying herself and getting off, check. (Or the best actress I've ever seen, lol.). ...but I don't have the huge ass dick that usually seems to get her there and even if I did, I don't like to share (with other guys). Heh.

Of course that doesn't make the story any less fucking hot! Hehehe! I do wish there was a second chapter or a good wrap-up to the story. It ends acceptably clean, but you're left wanting a bit.

Overall enjoyed it a lot and look forward to reading more from this author, thanks!!

This is a good story, earned it's five stars. Porn star mom has potential but would much rather see the growth of the relationship between Zach and Jess.

In the end it's of course your choice, thank you for your work,

Tanhors and family.

Really bad grammer. Story wasn't much better. 1 star

If you’re going to insult my grammar, at least learn how to spell the word correctly.

Story! I'm not an English professieior , I didn't come hear to criteeesize your sppelling.

It's a Hot fantasy,with good character development. I too would like to read more of this brother- sister relationship. But as someone else has said that is up to you. Great stand alone story, Thanks!

Fantastic

Great story.I hope you do more with these characters .May be have Mom and son, daughter and mom.

this story could use more chapters.

Would love to see a follow up, where they fall in love, he goes off to college and moves in with her. Saves her from the porn industry as they try to get her in deeper and into drugs and off set prostitution. Yada yada. Not interested in a mom story personally, mom son/daughter or father son/daughter porn/erotica disgusts me. Others enjoy it so no judgement here, just won't read it. :D Anyways thanks for the cool short story, I liked it.

Chapter 2 could follow them living and fucking together in college, then maybe chapter 3 could bring mom into the story for a threesome, then chapter 4 would bring dad into the family sexual relationship, afterall, the son is fucking mom. It's only right that dad fucks the daughter.

Loved it! Would love to see a follow-up with Zach headed to the same college as Jess and him moving in with her as her lover. Maybe her encouraging him to become a porn cock for her as her "husband" on set. Maybe mom could soften to the idea of Jess as a pornstar, and mom and dad could make their own "home movie".

Please follow this story up with a second chapter with these character's.

Love to read another chapter with Zach and JESS moving in together and making a movie.

Very good.

You asked for suggestions, so here goes. Firstly I would have racked up the sexual tension between them after she got home for Christmas. He's a virgin, so he would have been confused by her flirting, possibly thinking: 'This is what she does at work. It's not for me, she's just teasing.' etc, etc.

Future ideas, how about a prequel? Make Jess your protagonist and write about what happened to her.

I happened to have submitted a story titled 'Best Christmas Present Ever,' which is also in the incest section. I was relieved when I discovered it is not like yours and hope you understand I didn't copy your work.

Have a read and leave five stars and a comment if you like it. Chapter five will be posted next week and my proofreader has said it is my best yet.

Not into whore stories.

I'm with mom on this one...

I really don't know about this one.

What bothers me the most is the "CASUALNESS" of it all.

A virgin little brother not having a meltdown that his sister is a pornstar? same dad? (aren't dads freaking out the most?)

not seeing her in another light, because of the stigma of pornstars.

hows there also no talk about how she got into it, if she "enjoy/enjoys" it or just for the money, if she cums etc. etc.

and most head shakingly for me.." oh yea I didn't get u anything for Christmas so I'm taking your virginity"...WHAT?

I mean we are in the "Incest/Taboo" Section, that was a little TOO casual, for sex between bro/sis.

As another commenter said. build up sexual tension. her flirting with him etc. etc.

A massage is all we get as sexual tension/"foreplay"? Again for a topic like Incest, too casual.

You could've easily replaced brother and sister and put longtime sandbox/kindergarten friends, would've been no different (other than maybe living situations).

I liked your general writing though.

Great weaving of multiple story strands. Hot story, well crafted!

Crafted, tight, hot! Thank you!

I loved it. Add mom in. Add in another sister or an aunt. Maybe get them to try porn. Keep it going.

Great 1 star worthy story.

It was readable. Brother and sister is pretty much like brother and sister without a well developed storyline.

It was an average story for them getting together,, but it ended with so much more left out. There needs to be a continuation of this ,, the next morning after,, is this a one and done moment,, what happens down the road,,, does she quit porn and have a relationship with her brother

Ok, nothing great but readable. I will give an eight.

Yeah, not into sisters who sell themselves for money.