The Book of Attraction Pt. 01

Keri brought forth the rings she seemed to pick at random. Out of the three there was only one I liked. Silver with smart etching coiling around it.

"And what about the pendants? These here are our best sellers." Her own hands were merchandised with rings as she let the few pendants swing loosely from her delicate grip.

Jenny made an argument for a particular one she fancied. It was hard to argue with a woman as beautiful as her. If she liked it, then I'm sure others would too. Even after spending thirty odd minutes in the store Keri did not seem to catch on to who I was. In fact, she even gave me the oddest look when I'd said 'See you in school.' as I left.

Jenny walked me to get my new haircut to complete my new look. We passed some guys from my year and they seemed to be impressed I was hanging out with a chick as hot as Jenny. Me and Jenny had that one-time thing once back when we were younger. We played spin the bottle at a party and we had to stand in the closet for 5 minutes just us to. Nothing happened apart from her giving me a light peck on the lips and holding my hand. Even then I never really looked at her that way. To me it was cool to have someone like her be my friend. Before I parted ways with her, I thanked her for the help, and she made sure to get me to send her a picture of the final product.

I hadn't had a haircut in so long and I sat nervously in the chair whilst waiting for the dude to cut my hair. When he asked what I wanted, I awkwardly pointed to one of the pictures he had up on his wall of his previous cuts, and he made it happen. With short back and sides and spiky top I honestly looked like a new man. I could not wait to get home and show my Sister.

When I walked in the door Lucy was almost about to leave. She had band practice and I did not want to keep her from being late with a conversation.

"Omg. Matt... you look so... different!" She had noticed.

"Yeah I guess it was time for a new look." I remembered what the book had read. I did not want to seem so into her. I needed to act uninterested to get her interested in me. I needed to be the food that was off the menu, or the best deal that was no longer on offer.

"No really, you look so good! You suit your hair!... and are they tight jeans?"

I had to admit. I did not expect this kind of reaction from her. Lucy seemed shocked yet impressed with my new look.

"What's with all the bags and what happened to my big brother?" she asked now amused at such a turnaround in appearance.

"I decided I needed a change. Do you really like it?"

"Matt this may sound weird coming from your sister, but you look kinda hot." Lucy winked as she swirled out the door with her trombone.

My sister just called me hot. Was I really hearing this? I could not decide whether she saw me this way or she was just trying to make me feel good about the new changes I was making. One thing was for sure, she sure was hot. I hated to admit it but when it came to looks, she got the lions share. A few guys in my year had mentioned the 'new talent' that was coming through. It filled me with blinding rage to think they thought of her that way. Before it would maybe have went over my head. But as of recent I felt protective over her. The thought of her suddenly with her new man made me sick. Maybe she did mean what she said about me before she left. Maybe she didn't. One thing was for sure we would find out.

Once alone in my room I neglected to masturbate. The book mentioned prolonged absence of orgasm and I had to do it by the book, to the letter. I decided this would be a great time to get research in on how to transform the small belly fat that hung over my waist into a carved six pack sculpted from hard work and perseverance. It took a few hours of research and a lot of planning to find the regime that best suited me. I could workout in the garage later in the day or earlier in the morning.

The next few weeks had flown by, almost a month since I had started using the book. It had been almost a month since I had started working out and I was beginning to see the improvements. My stomach had toned down significantly, though it was not defined, the fat was gone, and my shoulders had already become more rounded.

Lucy seemed to notice the changes in my body quicker than me. The new clothes I wore complimented my newfound shape and I had to admit my confidence was certainly growing. I had grown fond of my new clothes and wanted to keep them in good condition. The basement was mostly empty apart from the washing machine and the dryer. A couch sat below the staircase in view of a large tv. The TV Lucys dad had bought her, something she hadn't yet used. Alone in the basement I attended to my laundry. Folding it neatly into my basket I bent down to reach for the Ralph Lauren fleece I had purchased not too long ago.

My hand clasped something of silk. Pink panties with lovely patterns and a pretty bow. Not my Mothers, my Sisters. My erection grew out of nowhere. It must have been washed since it came from my clean set. Regardless I brought it to my nose to have a sniff. It smelled of softener and lavender. I wished it had somehow been missed in the wash. I tried as best I could with my senses and imagination, to imagine what it smelled like dirty, what she smelled like rather. I had gotten used to the shame by now. It usually hit me after my orgasm subsided. Jerking off became a once a week occurrence. Though when I did it was something special. Going from jerking off morning noon and night, to once a Monday was a new experience.

However, I had seen many benefits from it. Increased sex drive, more energy, motivation. It even seemed to radiate off me. Like holding back kept all my testosterone in. I noticed the way woman had started looking at me. The only opinion that mattered was my sisters, the same girl's underwear I had my face buried into. The thought drifted from my head when I heard rush of footsteps above.

The noise was muffled but I could tell something was wrong.

"Matt!..Matt!" my heart sank. The time of her voice. The desperation in it, I could tell what was about to come next.

"Lucy I'm down here!"

Lucy descended the steps in a hurry and leaped into my arms. She buried her head into my shoulder sobbing loudly. When is say my heart tore in half it felt like it had. The pain in my chest came out of nowhere. A deep feeling of hurt and grief.

"He's gone Matt! He's gone!" Lucy was in hysterics.

I held her close to me with my arms wrapped around her and my hand behind her head. I did not feel for the closeness right now. This was about a brother and sister in grief. He wasn't my father but It hurt, he had been there for me like a father should. I rarely saw him but the sadness was real. I could not imagine how Lucy was feeling. Her blood, her father, who brought her up and taught her so many things was now gone. In the moment I had no words I just kept her close to me. We sat down on the couch and she never left my side. She cried and cried until she could no longer, eventually falling asleep in my arms.

I did not cry but the tears had bubbled. She lay with me sideways on the couch for what seemed like hours. She slept peacefully despite how upset she had been. Dirty tear marks stained her cheeks in streaks. Her hair was a little tangled and she pouted in her slumber. She was so incredibly beautiful I could not help but stroke her cheek. Pulling the hair away from her face and round her small ear. Her breath was shallow and she did not even stir.

My mind found visions of my mother alone. I did not know where she was. I only hoped she was okay. I knew she had troubles with addiction, part of me wanted to believe she had not hit the drink. But another part of me knew she probably would.

It was getting late, and I had not slept at all, Lucy stirred at around half past nine. Her eyes blinked open, heavy with the crust of her dried tears. She moaned sadly and cuddled into me more. I pulled her in tight and kissed her forehead. It felt right to do in the moment. Normally I would think this was a little far but after all she was my baby sister and I wanted to comfort her.

Her blue eyes looked up at mine. I could see the pain even through the reflection of myself.

"Lucy it'll be okay" I said.

"Your dad fought hard but he's in a better place now. You've been so strong for so long and for that I honestly look up to you. I wish I could make all this pain go away. I'll do whatever I can for you to make this process as easy as possible."

When I'd said that the tears came again. This time they were silent. There was no sobbing, she just cried silently. Spotting further up next to me she put her head against mine and wrapped her arms around my shoulders.

"You're an amazing man Matt. I love you."

"I love you too Lucy." I said back.

Lucy was the first to move, she had been lying awkwardly for so long, she mentioned her back was sore and sat up. I opted to rest my hand in her shoulder. I gave her a gentle squeeze and she tilted her head to meet my hand.

"Where is mom?" She was concerned.

"I don't know, I'm gonna go looking for her when you get some sleep."

Lucy did not like what I'd said.

"No we're going together." Her voice cracked.

"Lucy, today has been long enough as it is, and you'll be emotionally drained. Please, for me, get some sleep. I'll go out looking for mom and bring her home. I'll wake you once we are back."

To that she did not say anything. She stood up and her tights were sunk deep between her as cheeks. I did my best not to look. Now was not the place nor time. I walked her to her room and tucked her into her bed.

Her room was very neat and tidy. She took to decorating it herself with fairy lights and candid photos. Her room smelled of vanilla and flowers. I tucked her into her bed. I gave her one last hug before leaving. Her hand gripped mine tight before I let go.

It took some time in finding my mother. She was at the bar downtown, drinking by herself. When she saw me she sobbed. With no thought or concern for who saw. My mother was distraught in my arms. Today I really felt like the man of the house. It was not a proud moment given the circumstances, it was a sort of heavy feeling. I drove her home as she slept in the passenger seat of the car. Her head rolled with the movements of the car and the stench of wine polluted the air.

I carried my mother into the house and straight to her bed. I thanked myself then for working out, over the years my mother had grown larger and she was not light in weight. Like I did my sister I tucked her into her bed and kissed her forehead.

I was not completely sure of how I felt about Roberts death myself. He wasn't my father, mines had died years ago. But he had taken care of me for a large part of my life. I couldn't imagine what my mother and sister were going through.

I returned to my room that was set in darkness. I could hardly make out the shapes inside my room when I slithered into my bed the sheets were cold, but I found the mattress welcomed me. As soon as my head hit the pillow it was evident I wasn't alone. Someone was in the bed with me.

"Lucy?" I asked. Breaking the silence in my dark room.

"Sorry Matt, this isn't too weird is it? I didn't want to be alone tonight and I couldn't sleep."

Her voice was quite but I could tell she had still been crying. The pain in her voice echoed from her whisper. Her leg brushed up against mine, it then came to me she was not wearing a lot. Her bare thigh was hot and brushed mine.

"Lucy..." I began.

"Please Matt, I don't want to be alone. When I fell asleep in your arms earlier I felt so safe. Like everything would be okay".

I felt her hand grip my wrist, she pleaded. She knew it was wrong for us to share a bed at this grown age, but if she wasn't bothered by it then neither was I. I had to admit I was not used to sharing a bed with another person. Let alone my sister. Her face was closer to mine than I had anticipated and I felt her breath on my neck.

I battled against my erection. I couldn't help the feelings I had manifested for my sister over the past few weeks. Now that she lay beside me, with little clothes on my imagination could not help but think what it was that she had on. Was it a nightie? A bra and panties? Just shorts and no bra? No, not that but perhaps the first two.

"If this helps you then I'm okay with it. If you'd like I'll keep my distance and just be here with you." I spoke into the darkness.

"Thank you..." I heard her voice say quietly.

Her hand remained around my wrist and she gave it a little squeeze as thanks for being there for her. I lay on my back with her relatively close to me. I could still feel her breath against my neck and I still battled with my arousal.

I couldn't remember drifting off, my eyes could not adjust to the darkness of my room. Some light had crept in from behind the blinds and it cast shadows all around me. My alarm clock read 3:45AM. I turned to my side to reposition my head. The way I had been lying hadn't been easy on my neck. When I did my foot felt something against it. Realising Lucy was still in my bed my first thought was to back up, but I didn't. I stayed frozen in bed touching her with my foot. I could no longer feel her breath against me, maybe she had turned to face the wall.

I adjusted my position again and felt my hand brush up against her back. She had a t shirt on at least. She was right next to me. Not the other side of the bed. Right against me. Moving any closer I'd be up against her. For a while I stayed quiet, holding my breath, to make sure I did not wake her.

It could have been five minutes or it could have been an hour. I was no longer tired, I was wide awake still in the same position. For a while I wondered if she was awake herself. Her breathing had changed and she shifted a little. I felt her back against my stomach, I felt her ass come together with my crotch. I only wore boxers and now I knew. Silk shorts, I felt them rub against my leg as she came against me. She must have still been sleeping because I'm way at all would she do this intentionally. She was my sister, she did not feel the way I felt. My mind raced at the thought of were my cock was. I could feel her peachy ass, the curve of her crack between her filled cheeks. The silk may as well have not been there.

I could no longer help it, my natural feelings overcame me. Like being drunk and horny I resisted the urge to thrust. My cock tented in my briefs and it now pressed hard against her firm cheeks. My breathing quickened and if she was awake I'm sure she would have felt me against her.

Lucy groaned and shifted back again. This time I dug into her and pressed between her cheeks. Like it was trying desperately to enter her. If it had not been for the silk of her shorts and my boxers I most certainly would be inside her.

The friction was stimulating to me. The head of my cock rubbed away at the waistband of my boxers until It was poking out of them. As if my cock was trying to escape and reach my sister. The head pressed against her silk. I could not do this. Not to my sister, she had just been through something traumatic and this had gone on far enough. I was just about to tuck myself back into my boxers when I felt her press harder against me. Lucy let out a gentle moan. This had to be a dream.

"Lucy?..." I whispered.

She did not answer, but press firmly against me once more. Precum oozed from my prick and dribbled down my shaft. I damped parts of her silk shorts and she slid against me. Rubbing her ass against the underside of my cock head. The only noise that could be heard was the sound of us awkwardly thrusting against each other. Lucy moaned again and that did it. Cum erupted from me like it had never done before. Like it was the first time I climaxed all over again. My cock was pulsating against her ass and I shot streams of hot goo all over her shorts.

I panicked. Lucy did not move. Her breathing continued. She was asleep! I'd just dry humped my sister when she was asleep! What had I done? I'd just took advantage of her vulnerability. I was sure she was awake. She pressed against me, many times to the point it was practically grinding. Or maybe it was all in my head and she had been innocent sleeping the whole time. I escaped the bed silently and retreated to the bathroom. The light switched on and my eyes immediately hurt. I was sweating and my shorts were a wet mess.

I couldn't even look at myself in the mirror. Partially due to the light but partially due to shame. I changed my clothes with the clean ones I found folded neatly in the corner next to the wash basket. It took a personal pep talk to find the confidence to enter my own room again. The light from the hall invaded what was once dark. My bed was empty, she had gone. Had she woken up and seen what I'd done? Then ran out of fear? Was she scared of me? Was she disgusted? What if she told Mom? She must have fled to her room. I was tempted to knock on the door. But what would I say?

I returned to bed and felt the mess that I had left. My sheets still smelled of her. I'd never cum so much in my life. After I changed the sheets I fell into bed and buried my face into my pillow. Sleep was a mercy to me. It swept me away like a boat sailing in the sea. Until it crashed against the rocks in an instant. The morning came but the shame had not left me. Light filled my room and the shapes I could not make out before were clear to me. I heard birds chirping outside from my open window. I half expected mom to Burst into my room to pack my things, with my sister in tears behind her.

But nothing happened. I lay in bed alone with my thoughts. Until I heard footsteps behind my door.

My mother entered my room, still in her dressing gown with her hair in knots.

"Matt, I want to apologise. Last night I should have been the parent and I should have been taking care of you and Lucy. But instead if was you. I just want you to know I'm sorry but I'm also thankful. You're really growing into a brilliant young man." Mom smiled in the kind caring way she did.

It only made me feel worse. I wasn't the man she thought I was. That man wouldn't take advantage of his younger grieving sister like that.

When she left I had to drag myself from bed. In the kitchen my sister sat with Mom and ate breakfast. She looked kind of rough but not like she had been crying. Lucy did not even look my way until I was sat next to her. Still wondering If she had been awake or not. When her eyes met mine I could not depict how she felt.

"Morning, Matt." She smiled.

"Morning, Lucy."

"How was your sleep?" We exchanged glances.

"I slept well... how was yours?"

"Hot, sweaty, but good." Her eyes gave nothing away.

Mother poured me a hot cup of coffee and set my plate before me.

"Since you were so good to us last night Matt we thought you'd like your breakfast made for you." Mom was smiling and I could tell she was proud. But they both were still in pain. The regular silence confirmed that. The pain was still raw and Matt wanted to give them space.

"I need to get some things today from the store, so I'll be out most of the day. Let me know if you guys need anything."

Lucy looked confused.

"Are you sure you don't want to spend the day with us?" She asked.

"I do but I need to stock up on a few things. Besides fresh air would be good for me."

I ate the rest of my breakfast in silence as my mom and sister continued conversation about the funeral and memories of Robert.

The next few weeks were hard. Lucy hadn't asked to stay in my bed again after the first night. Part of me thought she knew but I could never be certain. Lucy had a camping trip coming up with the school. She had paid a lot of money for it and despite her fathers passing she decided it would be good for her to go and be one with nature with her friends.