All Comments on 'The Cherub's deal'

Defiantly should have been more descriptive with the mom and the other ladies. The end felt rushed and lacked the imagination the first part had. Could have been a great series.

There was a real opportunity to do something interesting here.

The whole story was rushed, and the ending, shall we say, even more so.

I see no reason you couldn't take it, and just add a bit more meat to it. The premise has real possibilities.

You rushed it. Take more time.

I agree with many of the other comments for this story, it does feel a little rushed at the end. However, I also understand that not every story should be like a television drama stretched almost ad infinitum. Overall a good story. Plan on reading more of your work. 3 stars. Keep it up!!!

And it fizzles. Next time dont go past the purpose of the story unless you want it be a part it. Once he got the power you should have finished it. The pregs and porn was silly.

4star, but could have been 5

good work I like your method and tastes when it comes to stories these have been refreshing especially after all the ones I read lately having annoying endings where the main characters don't even stay together or they do something that is wildly out of character

Haven't you heard that women who haven't gotten it for a while get upset if they aren't getting the complete and thorough rogering they were promised? I'm more inclined to believe he was hiding from these shortchanged women and not angry domestic partners!

good premise but felt very rushed.

The whole porn business at the end dropped it to 4 stars for me.

should have went back to sis...no babies, no porn. 4 stars otherwise good story.

I like fast paced, but this just zoomed right by. Reads more like a summary than a story