All Comments on 'The Chronicles of Hvad Ch. 08'

But what else would we expect from you - keep going - really enjoying it

I laughed harder at that than I should have, but it's just one of the many examples of why I love your writing! You bring your stories to life and make it so that we are not reading as much as living along side your characters!!!

I just have to ask - how come you're using so many Estonian names in this story?

Great story, btw.

You'd think by now Borna & Ljudevit could get into Asrava's steading blindfolded. It's not wise to go killing with a blindfold...

A few readers have noticed that there are several Estonian names in the story. That's because:

A) they sound really cool to me

B) I meant for Hvad to have a vaguely East European flavour (Hospodars & Bans, guslars & druzhinas)

C) I didn't want to use names that sounded like Tolkien, or Beowulf. I absolutely love both of those stories (and worlds), but I wanted to avoid Vikings and Anglo-Saxons here. Some of the other names I used are Mordvin, Avar, Croatian and even Babylonian.

It almost does sound like you're talking about the new fighters being from Izmir or some part of Turkey (as another poster thought). These Uplanders kind of sound Scottish by how "rough" they were, although I don't think Scots were that filthy by any means. They were known as very "hard" though. Interesting to introduce them here, since we had not heard of them before. However, you rope them in without bogging us down in too much detail. Vepar sounds like an uber-brutish Khoren, and the 3 new Uplander women are quite the additions, although I don't know if anyone will soften Meeli up. I suppose since their leader is the "Shining One," every other female PAYLS in comparison to her. ;)

So funny about Payl abusing Ljudevit. She didn't hold anything back and returned the next night. I wonder what plans you have for her and her little band. You threw me another curve with showing Tsoline a little sweet on Ljudevit--especially given he said in an earlier chapter she "was a killer."

Great addition with this ch 8, and it surprised me how quickly you got it out. Thanks for balancing the action with the dialogue well and keeping it real. You also treat your characters equally well, so they don't get lost in each chapter. That's a big plus.

Keep up the great storytelling! 5

Wow I like stories which I can't predict that much and you my friend are truly gifted on that for example I never thought the story could head on this direction.Thanks really appreciate your work big up

You're a good writer, but your story telling is... not great. Maybe map these things out in an outline or something.

"... You'll do..."

Write on!

I feel like there's some inconsistency that editors missed here - around a time they meet Payl and dialog there.

I feel like I'm kinda missing something now, got bogged down in a detail and so my eyes glazed over for a paragraph and didn't realize maybe? Just isn't flowing as well

Just keeps getting better, write on.

How did I ever miss this gem before: "The body odour [sic] emanating from them could have choked a buzzard."

IMPOSSIBLE to choke a buzzard, but you choose imagery that's hilarious in its contradiction [hyperbole]. Love it!