The Collegeworld Ch. 06

Thomas woke up naked. He was curled up on the cold floor next to a big pool of dried jizz.

Ah yes, that was his.

His memory started to return as he got up. Full reset had not been entirely unpleasant, though not something he wanted to go through regularly. He preferred to have more control.

His clothes and the technician tablet were in a pile on the floor. On top was a piece of paper.

"You're welcome. -A," it said.

There was no denying that his mind was clearer than it had been in a long time. What had happened? It had been weeks, maybe a month, since he'd been able to see things clearly.

Right, it had started when he'd fallen in love with Christine. Since then his perception of the reality had been modulated by a mixture of love and lust that he'd unsuccessfully tended with furious masturbation and daydreams.

He really should take better care of himself. Not just sexually or emotionally, but in general. He was acutely aware of how badly he was out of shape. He had an alarming case of emerging freshman gut. His hair was a mess and his facial stubble was an embarrassment rather than masculine.

He needed a life coach and a therapist. And separately, he needed to use his time better than to chase pussy that he was too scared to touch even when he could do so.

Thomas got dressed in the hazmat suit Adonis had politely left for him. There'd be a lot of explaining to do if the sorority girls called cops on him.

His fear was unnecessary. The entrance hall of the sorority house was empty. As he walked out he realized the sun was just rising. Good timing.

He walked to the campus and to the math building. He saw a graduate student who looked like he hadn't slept all night wander the corridors, but otherwise the building was empty.

The door to the professor's door opened easily. Had he forgotten to lock it or did the suits make him able to open locked doors in the simulation? It didn't matter.

He started composing a message on the tablet. It didn't matter if the professor would walk in; he was invisible to the agents, after all.

"Hello,

I know what happened in the motel room 42 between you and the other person present. She does not know me and she does not know I am writing this to you.

To show I am serious, I am attaching a still image, showing you sitting in the room, waiting for her arrival with the bottle of wine and condoms. Rest assured there is a video of the whole interaction but to protect her privacy should you go to the police I am not including that here. The full video will be included in a subsequent message to various authorities and news outlets should the demands here not be fully met."

Thomas smiled at first but was soon overcome by his pity for Lina. How alone she must feel, alone in a foreign country, paid pittance in exchange for her brilliant work, and forced to prostitute herself to her superior.

"I will keep this simple. You are to not have sex with her or any other student ever again. I will keep watch and I will know. You are to not talk with her or any other student behind closed doors. You will keep all future interactions with her strictly business and should she want to change advisors you will do everything you can to make it happen. On top of that every Monday you will take $200 in cash and put it in an envelope and leave said envelope on your desk overnight. I will take this cash and deliver it to her in a way she does not know where it is from.

Any attempts to retaliate against her will not be tolerated. Any attempts to uncover my identity will be fruitless but will nevertheless not be tolerated. You are free to go to the police for extortion but be assured that the detective will be receiving mail from me afterward."

Thomas debated including a snarky remark at the end but decided against it. He sent the document to the professor's own printer together with the still image he found using the recording system Adonis had told him about.

He paused at the realization. There would be so much material there. He wasn't sure if all agent activity was recorded or just active monitoring, but it would be a trove of treasure, and probably some horror, if he dared to take a look.

He'd have to think about it another day. For now he folded the papers neatly, put them in a university-branded envelope he took from the professor's desk, and put the envelope on the professor's keyboard.

###

With that bit of business taken care of Thomas skulked to his dorm room and changed very, very quietly to his normal clothes while his roommate snored.

"You're back," Thomas heard as he was buttoning up his jeans.

"Yeah. Sorry, didn't mean to wake you up," Thomas turned to his roommate.

"Try not making noise the next time. I've heard it helps. So, uh, have a nice night?"

You wouldn't believe, he thought.

"Uh, yeah. Some board games, nerdy stuff, you know. It was late so I just slept on the couch there," he said.

"Sure. So, there was a girl here last night. Christine, I think. She was looking for you."

"Really? Did she say why?"

"I didn't think to ask. She said she'd come again tomorrow. That's today in today's time frame, if you're not keeping track."

"Yeah, great. Well, I actually need to run now. Have some errands to do. See you!" Thomas said, almost running out the door. Christine was the last person he wanted to see right now. He'd need to get cured of her and the best way would be to limit contact.

Thomas was nervous when he opened the door to the university's health center. The receptionist was a middle-aged woman with a friendly but tired face.

"Hi. Could I see a therapist?"

She looked at him over her glasses. "Do you have an appointment?"

"No, but this is kind of urgent. Is there anyone available?"

Her face stiffened. "Are you considering self-harm?"

"Oh no! Nothing like that. Just feel I'm about to have a breakdown. Please, is there anyone I could talk to?"

She nodded and started typing on her computer.

"There's nobody who's fully board certified, but we do have an intern, miss Stafford, in the office now. Let me call."

The call took only a few seconds. Thomas couldn't hear what they were talking about.

"Sir? Yes, miss Stafford will see you. I should note that this is mainly a preliminary intake call where she will assess whether you need a certified therapist or whether she can take you as a client. If you do need a professional then we will try to book you as soon as possible. Okay?"

"Yeah, absolutely," Thomas said. "Thank you very much."

The receptionist told Thomas the room number and he went there, opened the door, and saw Lara Stafford, Christine's roommate, sitting behind her desk.

She was dressed in a pant suit and smiling a professional, polite smile.

"Please take a seat," she said, showing him to a chair.

Her eyes stayed on him as he sat down. Finally, she spoke again. "Wait a moment. Do I know you? You're a friend of Christine, aren't you?"

"Yes," Thomas nodded. "Is...is that a problem?"

She shook her head slightly. "Not from my point of view. This is a small campus and we do see people who know, just not people we have personal relationship with. If you are comfortable with me then there is no problem. Rest assured everything we talk about here is strictly confidential and even if we meet in a social setting I will not bring this up or acknowledge it unless you do first so yourself."

A heavy weight was lifted off Thomas' shoulders. "I absolutely have no problem with this. I really just need to talk to someone, anyone, as soon as possible."

She turned her body squarely toward him. "I understand that. How about you tell me the general nature of why you came here and I will see how we can proceed. Okay?"

"I will try. It's just...I haven't really talked to anyone, so it is a bit weird. Okay? So," he took a deep breath, "basically I have not been doing so well in school the past month. I have been in love with someone who doesn't feel the same way and this makes me suffer. I think lately I may be getting over it but I still feel I'm being crushed by all the work and all the stress."

Her face was so nice when she smiled. Her lips were full and her large, brown eyes were beautiful.

"I understand. This is very common and you are not alone with these feelings. I am happy you came to talk to us today."

"Wait! Sorry to interrupt, but I must add something else. Umm...I think I also have a problem with...sex. I feel it's on my mind all the time and I can't focus."

She nodded and wrote something down on her notepad. "I take it you're not in a relationship given your feelings toward this other person?"

"Right. So I try to get over it and get back to work by...ahem."

Her smile didn't falter. "Yes, I understand. Again, this is a completely normal way to deal with the situation. Statistically most of the population, especially those who are single, engage in this."

Damn, she was cool. "Yes, I know, but it is still shameful to talk about. So anyway, it is not helping. I feel I need more and more and it helps me focus less and less. I know this can't go on and I will lose my mind at some point, but I don't know what to do."

Thomas felt emotions well up in his throat.

Lara offered him the box of tissues that was on her desk. Thomas took one and blew his nose.

"The demands of college life can feel overwhelming, especially when combined with unhappiness in one's personal life. We as humans need meaningful social interactions and this can make other sort of interactions feel hollow and even counter-productive. Endless mountains of homework keep us constantly under stress but offer little satisfaction. It is a struggle."

With every word the knot around Thomas's chest loosened. He hadn't realized how common his problems were. Of course he also had some problems of a very special type but he wasn't about to talk about that to this young woman. Who he'd kind of abused just a few days earlier.

"Are you all right?" she asked and Thomas jumped back to reality.

"Oh, yes. I was just thinking about something. So, how would I be able to escape this cycle of unhappiness?"

"The first step is to understand there is no easy way. If there was the cycle would not exist. It is possible to escape it, but it will not happen instantly. We typically recommend a two-pronged approach. The first prong is that you should see a therapist weekly. I am more than happy to take you as a client, assuming you are still comfortable with me. The second prong, which is the more important one, is that you should start doing activities that bring you true happiness, not simply moments of relief. And I don't mean sexual activities, though they can certainly also be meaningful. Many people find volunteering a good way to find a meaning, though a hobby can work equally well."

"No offense intended, but that is easier said than done. I feel I don't have enough time as is, and I don't know where to find time to start some new hobby."

She nodded solemnly. "I know it can be hard, but the key realizations is that the quantity is not as important as the quality. An hour every week or every two weeks can be a good start. As you start feeling more satisfaction from life you often will also start feeling like you have more time available, because less time is spent worrying. So how about I give you a task to come up with ideas of activities you could do for our next session?"

"I can try, but I don't know if that will work."

"Just do your best," she smiled. "Remember, there is no failures here. It is my job to keep pushing you gently. Your job is to try to be comfortable doing things you would normally find slightly uncomfortable. Makes sense? Just do your best and try to come up with three or five possible activities, and we will see how it goes?"

Thomas nodded. "Okay. So, next week, same time and place?"

She shook her head. "In this case I recommend you would come back sooner, let's say in two days. I should have open slots then.

###

The sun was already up when Thomas walked out. He was simultanously relieved of having talked to someone, but frustrated that the only thing she could offer was for him to come up with ways to volunteer. He had no skills and he wasn't a people person. Besides, he was afraid that if he stopped his technician duties it would be the end for him, and that did take quite a bit of time.

Then again, that was, undoubtedly, a form of volunteering. He had no idea how he'd explain this to Lara, but it was something he could potentially do. The whole sexual aspect of it was something he didn't know how to solve, but he'd have to cross one bridge at a time.

Could he actually do it, help people? Helping Lina had felt wonderful, to be sure. Despite the awful things that he knew she'd endured he felt solace in knowing that she would be better off now.

There was one pressing matter left. This would be the hardest.

###

Thomas knocked on 207's door. An annoyed voice called him in.

"Oh, 2077! Fantastic job calling for that hard reset last night!" Her tone had changed the second she saw it was him. "The operating tech, 2048, reported it was a full success, and our preliminary readings of the agent say he is feeling significantly more stable now. In fact, let me see how he's doing right now..."

Thomas felt bile rise up his throat. His supervisor could not under any circumstances try to find the agent, i.e., him.

"Oh, let me take care of that once we're done here," he managed to come up. "I feel it's my responsibility, after all. I'm sure you have more important work than routine monitoring."

"You're right, of course," she sighed. "I'm just a bit frustrated, to tell you the truth. The tech, that 2048, marked the treatment confidential, so I can't see anything that's going on there. Honestly I just like seeing these male hard resets. They're so...inspiring. Why don't you find her and ask why she did it, okay? I don't have any other pressing tasks for you. Check up on the agent and make sure he's fine, and then figure out what's the deal with the hidden recording."

Crisis averted for now.

"Was that all, 2077?" she said, her voice back to being annoyed.

"Actually, you brought this topic up. I had another reason for a visit."

"Oh? Well, out with it."

Thomas looked down at his gut that was clearly visible through the thin jump suit. "This is embarrassing, but is there a plan of some sort I could follow to get into a better shape?"

Her eyes grew a bit, but eventually she nodded.

"Wow. This kind of self-control, to suggest it voluntarily...yes, there is. I was planning to wait and see if the situation would improve on its own, but I can absolutely refer you to a voluntary conditioning appointment. Do you want to do that right now?"

"Yes, please."

"Great. I'll call Dr. 0 immediately."

Doctor 0 was a very old man but you wouldn't be able to tell from his physical appearance. He looked like he was in his early 40s, his skin slightly wrinkled and his hair showing traces of silver. No, Thomas knew the man was old only because on his wall were pictures of seven generations of his family.

"Captivating, isn't it?" the doctor said.

Thomas snapped back to reality, somehow feeling shamed at having looked for so long.

"Relax, son, I don't mind. I am quite proud of my family. I hope I will live long enough to see one or two more generations," he winked. "Which brings me to you. I got a message from your supervisor that you asked to be enrolled in a voluntary Physical Performance Improvement Plan?"

"Yes, sir, that's correct."

The man's face was friendly. Thomas sensed no judgement from him.

"First, let me say that I am impressed you took such initiative. Most people are enrolled involuntarily due to their low job success rate. However, I pulled your file up and it seems despite being new here you've already done a lot of good work. Second, although I agree there is some work to be done, I want to assure you that I have seen much, much worse. We'll get you back in shape in no time!"

Thomas sighed audibly. "Do I even want to ask how?"

"It's easy. Just eat less and exercise more."

"Are...you serious?"

The doctor's smile faltered.

"Yes, of course I am serious. What else were you expecting? We'll change your meal allowance to have a new composition and include physical exercise in your duty roster. What are you currently eating?"

"I, ah, actually I'm mostly eating in the simulation. I'm eating their food."

The doctor nodded. "Yes, I see. No wonder. It is known to be quite unhealthy, though I understand technicians sometimes have to eat in the field due to time constraints. I will prescribe you three portions of Solid-Liquid Undeniably Delicious Gourmet Experience daily for three weeks."

"SLUDGE?"

"It's the newest in liquid nutrition. You drink it during a normal meal time and that's it. Just pack one in your tool bag in case you get hungry in the field, though the patented composition typically keeps you sated for full eight hours at a time."

"Got it. And the exercise?"

"There are a few options, and you can see what is the most convenient for you. Believe or not, some of our field technicians enjoy working out in the simulation, blending in with the agents in their gyms or running paths. Just make sure you dress in setting-approprite attire. Others report having enough exercise from their time with their companion. You have that sorted out, I trust?"

"Actually, my companion was transferred into the sim and I can't get a new one for a while."

"Oh, that's a pity. Sexual intercourse can be great for health."

"I'll keep that in mind, doctor."

"Yes, I understand it can be frustrating for one without a ratified partner or a companion here in the complex..."

His voice trailed off.

"Son, I feel bad for you. It says here you only had a companion for one day. That is some terrible luck, especially for someone as young as you are. Heck, I'm a hundred and thirty and I still have sex with my wife almost every day. Couldn't live without it."

The doctor suddenly looked around the room with a mischevous gaze, then gestured Thomas to come closer.

"Let me tell you a little medical secret," he whispered. "Your supervisor legally can't tell you this and I shouldn't either, but since you're new here I figured I'd bend the rules a bit. You can engage in said activity in the sim," the doctor said, winking.

"Yeah, of course I can. So do I just go and find an agent girlfriend?" Thomas said, wanting to tell the good doctor that it was easier said than done.

"No, no, you misunderstand me. This is something specific to the technicians."

"You mean I put the agents in trance and then have sex with them while they're unconscious?"

The doctor was taken aback, and Thomas realized he probably shouldn't be quite this rude. The man was trying to genuinely help.

"That is certainly an option, and many do it," the doctor replied.

"I know, sorry I replied like that. I just don't like the idea of doing it with unconscious women, agents or not."

The man nodded.

"I agree. It is better with a more active partner. Which is why I recommend you use pheromones."

Thomas almost burst out laughing, but managed to keep his voice mostly steady.

"Pheromones!? You mean, drug the agents into wanting sex?"

"Is that really any different from how the agents do it themselves? I encourage you to go into one of their party houses...what are they called again? Broternities?"

"Fraternities."

"Yes, that's right. Go into one of the fraternities during a party and you see people try to alter the brain chemistry of people they're attracted to all the time, in hopes that will lead to copulation. In one way or another most of human bonding rituals revolve around that. Give gifts? Dopamine. Hugging? Oxytocin. Or if it's alcohol the point is just to dull the brain activity enough that the target doesn't realize they actually don't want to have sex. Is it so bad to take a more efficient approach and use safe, fast alternatives?"