All Comments on 'The Currency of Time Ch. 02'

If you only read two out of the four installments promised, then the story doesn't make a whole lot of sense. However, if you wait for all four installments, you might get the complete story and enjoyed immensely!

Idiots!

Welcome back, DQS. You have been sorely missed. Thank you as always for sharing your stories.

Brujay

Great tale!I am still confused to know where this STORY is coming...

how long "Julie" goes before trying to remove Dede? If he is willing to kill over $10 million, what won't he do for 150 million dollars?

but Julian has to be looking over his shoulders for a long time, Maybe. TK U MLJ LV NV

No way the number 2 guy in the DA office participates in that and "settles" for Micheal getting his $10 million. Guy of that stature gets personally involved then butts are going to jail.

Once he had the recording and confirmed the truth. Why even bother with the multi-layered dramatic bullshit? Micheal should have produced the original recording and let "Uncle Mort" go to jail. Mort failed to honor her fathers (his friends wishes). Mort should have made it his business to make sure the boy friend stayed out of the picture.

If the reason for Micheal to go through all that was to get $10 million to piss the boy friend off, how does burning the check accomplish that for more than the 40 minutes delivery and burn time?

Maybe the next installments will answer some of these questions. Three Stars for this effort.

It looks like Michael lost big without having gained anything. I guess I will withhold judgement until the rest of the story is posted.

DQS1 trying to write a movie of the week.

Feels like there could be another chapter a couple of years down the road. Excellent writing as usual.

they all have to realize that from now to eternity they had better never ever make a faux pas tort. TK U MLJ LV NV

I gather that the rust came off with the 1st chapter.First the good, then the bad.

This one started slow but the plotting got better and better. The old hand at dialogue returned. About time,too!

The characters are not well developed and suffer the lack of emotional connection. At least to me, it looks like a razzle-dazzle plot. A substitute for emotional development of your characters. Very unlike your old stories. Maybe you are in a hurry.

Regardless of that defect ,gave you 4*s. This is better than 90% of the rest of this site.

I look forward to the next chapter. I am very

AMerryman

Congrats. I knew it was going to be good. But I had no idea it would be this good. Five out of five. But I never suspected Bill Maitland would appear. I have died and gone to DQS1 heaven (which is located in Jacksonville if anyone is wondering.)

Where to begin. I loved everything about the confrontation in the lawyers' office. I loved how McCarthy had a plan right from the beginning and made it work. I actually lost track of the arguments and counter arguments, moves and reverses at some point in the middle. I will go back and read it again and it will all be clear I'm sure.

Everyone's motivation makes total sense. First love, Catholicism, fake amnesia, him knowing it was fake because her father told him she had a crush on him for years was brilliant. Her protecting him from her crazy lover. Bill Freaking Maitland.

I understand McCarthy not sending her to jail after she saved his live, but I would have kept the money. I know he wanted to send everyone a big FU. But money is money.

Now a constructive criticism. The two-year time jump moves the story along quickly but I would have liked a couple of paragraphs showing they have a loving relationship in those two years. Maybe celebrating an anniversary or Christmas. Nothing huge but something. If the author expands this into a published story he might consider that.

I don't know if this story is over or continuing. Clearly Dierdre is hooking up with a psycho and I think she half knows it. If the story continues I would love to learn how she got back together with him.

Lastly a big thank you to the author for giving us this story. I hope there is more. Cheers Steve

I enjoy your writing style, your characters are at a depth that is seldom seen on this site.

Seriously depressing hot mess of a story. Convoluted and aimless.

I was surprised the Angel of Death let his hair grow back.

I'm hoping 03 and 04 are better than this.

As a story this is fabulously well written...as one would expect from a DQS story. Looking at the plot this is as AWFUL as the chapter 1. The plots holes are massive and when the reader when spends time thinking that plot holes, the story quality goes down

for example once Micheal had the tap he had all the proof he needed to show the law firms was 100% corrupt and this was a massive criminal conspiracy

I can't see how Deirdre would have anything to do with shithead. I would hope you explain her attraction other than the basic 'first love' tripe. She's not stupid and he's so obviously a opportunistic predator that it's hard to see why she'd want to throw away her marriage for him.

Looking forward to more.

No way should Julian have ended up with that $10M. If Michael didn't want it, then one of the people he had waiting in the wings to come at the press of a button should have been a rep from some charity for disabled oil drilling workers or a legal fund for cheated on husbands so he could make a big show of endorsing that check over to them.

....they simply aren't capable of enjoying anything.

And I think several of the yardsticks in the audience are a few inches short....

Looking forward to the next two chapters, warts and all.

And I hope shithead gets his ass kicked, but good!

I presume this took place before Debbie betrayed and left Bill because of his hair and paunch. Not sure if it is referred to in WWWM, will have to check.

Deirdre is quite some slut bitch from hell to do that to him just to placate her asshole boyfriend but is also very vulnerable. I think she may be in for a serious fall and deservedly and hopefully so but where will it go from there I wonder....

Why do they have to be so long and drawn out? And so full of "lawyer talk." (Because it's your forte, I guess.)

But the plot line sounds all too familiar. Regular guy (but tough and belligerent) gets shit on by the love of his life and walks away with his head held high. I haven't read the rest of the chapters yet but if true to form he'll have dalliances with other hot women, eventually finding on he will marry. He will have an opportunity to beat Gutman to a pulp. Deirdre will see the error of her ways, somehow. Ending with not everyone living happily ever after.

Let's see how good a prognosticator I am.

BTW. Did I saw I gave it 5 stars and have you as one of my favorite authors? You do write taut prose.

P.S. I like Maitland character in all your stories.

The father thought he was worth at least 10 mil. Even Deirdre thinks $10mil is OK. Why doesn't Michael think that he is worth 6.67% of the total? It just comes off as a cheap stunt. He thinks that he is making a statement by burning the check. What he is really doing is showing them he is an idiot.

had a few good moments in it. It is only a scene, but it is a pretty good scene.

Let me get this off my chest first. That little segment with the cop and the SAS guy? WHAT THE FUCK! Came out of nowhere, had no background. Tried to add humor to the story, but all it did was pull the reader out of the story. I was honestly flabbergasted at that entire exchange. Life is sometimes like that, but the fact that EVERYONE treated it as normal and natural...just...ugh!

The crime drama stuff was good. The emotions were good. I did not like the ending. Burning the check. I have written a scene like that but it's a cliché. And honestly, I could see no reason why he would not want to rub Gutman's face in it. I see the symbolism. I do. One does not live on symbols. He could have financed a dozen explorations which eviscerated her company. But he burned the check to make him seem like a bigger man...who fucks other mens wives without a conscience.

And again, I do not get the depth of his love for her. It's been TWO YEARS. The few scenes we have seen with her, she was a bitch. A troublesome spoiled bitch. That tape is a Hail Mary to make her NOT seem a bitch. But after spending something like 70 pages writing her as a bitch, no...that momentary flash of conscience (something the lead ALSO noted...and isn't he one to talk!) not enough.

Still, a wild ride so far.

By far the best dialogue on this site - no idea if that gift is natural or from a helluva lot of practice, but easily the most believable convos around here, well done.

five stars and a favorite. The fight between the security guy and the cop was a bit distracting. Made sense later in the story.

to have DQS come out of limbo and provide his wonderful writing skill, talent and creativity to LitErot site readers. Just really missed his contributions. Entertainment non-pareil. This story just really, really has put the cherry on 2015 for me. Please DQS ....I know writing is draining and really saps the creative juices ....BUT please continue and do not drift away again for such an extended time. I have been in serious withdrawal at not having my DQS fixes.

Thank You !!!

LM

Serious Fan

Is this really written by DQS, or just ghost-written? The "Do the right thing always" Maitland is going to coordinate that raid as a show, then let a whole office of corrupt frauds and an admitted rapist walk with all of the rancour that engendered, simply so that the rapist could get $10M? The story from his point of view would be the emotional turmoil of prosecuting the rape in spite of friendship and the later marriage.

And, any follow-ups should include an IRS manhunt looking for just over $3M; that was taxable income -it couldn't be considered a splitting of assets as there was no divorce.

Probably wouldn't have bothered commenting if it had been typical Literotica writer, but expected way more from this one. Of course, I should have known when the first chapter went from a story to a story outline that the author was just playing with an idea, not invested in his creation.

There might as well have been Martians in the room and Elvis doing a striptease for Jimmy Hoffa, just to add some realism.

2*

... I don't like Michael McCarthy.

I especially do not respect him. At all.

Saw what he was going to pull with the money way early... it truly was like watching a car accident in slow motion.

Yeah, he has his reasons for doing what he did... but you know what? FUCK HIS REASONS.

In my book, he's just another pathetic sucker dreamed up by DQS... 'know what, strike that - he's actually the biggest sucker Steele ever came up with. It seriously was like reading a goddamn Matt Moreau story.

A.... NY... WAY... It's unsurprisingly very well written, and, FML, I'm actually curious to see how the author will manage to force Deidre back into her idiot ex-husband's life. I'm invested, is what I'm saying... not at all happy about it, but it is what it is.

'Needs to be mention, though: however I feel about this story, Michael McCarthy. 'Cannot have any respect for any bozo willing to burn out $10 millions to prove how pathetically devoted he is to his cheating wife. He's a bonafide fool, and I ain't rooting for no fool.

This was just awful. Absurd does not describe it. The tape was turned over to police they did not illegally tape it. Makes it legal, especially due to the content.

The men in your stories are supposed to be tough, but in reality they are children.

***** well done.

It's a STORY dickwads...sheesh. You probably argue for hours over which is better - Star Wars or Star Trek (not to mention original vs TNG vs etc) [oh, by the way...they arn't real].

Don't bore with your evidence arguments or a "real" lawyer would never crap. We have an admitted sexual predator as Prez and a pedophile about to be elected to the Senate. CEO's cheat and plunder with abandon and you're worried about the "law?" There is NO LAW, the guilty go free and the innocent are punished - it happens every fucking day - there is only what you do about the situation you find yourself in and what might or might not result from that.

Great story man.

You should turn this into a movie!

Seriously its brilliant!

The things are complex but not believable. I do like serious creative plot but ping-pong with law enforcement is not believable at all, very artificial.

Contrived, so stupid

Went downhill fast

I can-t help but admire Michael

This has to be the dumbest, most contrived story ever written!!

Nice story where the Manly husband is a closet CUCK for his slutty wife...

This is pretty shitty.....no way he burns the check and lets asshole win.

the words flow, but the plot is absurdly convoluted. It's obvious to any intelligent reader that DQS is laboring through plot convolution after plot convolution to show how smart he is, and the unfortunate result is very nearly a parody of the crime genre. The scene of the meeting is actually farcical. BTW, any ADA would be absolutely obligated to take down so obviously corrupt a law firm, and the lawyers would never have stuck together.

He could have taken the $10 million and burned everyone. Bogus.

Great story with terrific building twists and turns, cant understand the negative reviews/comments, Second time reading won’t be the last,just 5⭐️.

Anyone who has any banking history above a 12 year old’s passbook savings knows that certified/official/bank checks are easily replaced even if deliberately destroyed. Especially every lawyer in that room. Especially with officers of the court as witnesses. So either the author didn’t know that or it was just a dramatic ploy to impress first year secretaries and a couple of uniformed cops.

I’m giving it a 5* because it’s an awesome story despite the fact that the author (probably) started with the stunt and then wrote the rest of the story and it deserves no more than a 3* as the entire premise is wrong.

Since I can’t prove it, the 5* stands.

~Enkidu

I can clearly see that this story was build around that confrontation. A part of my brain knows that this is extremely unrealistic but it still gave me an adrenaline rush. I love stories with emotional confrontations and this one was the best at it.

Burning the check for 10 million was merely a grand stunt, replacing a uncashed lost or destroyed certified check can be done very easily.

Hope in the final part,he destroys Hitman,her and her oil company.

This clears up the drivel of part 1, but still makes little sense. Your story "When we were married" was much, much better.

It's getting better... thank you.

This was so bad it was almost hypnotic, I just had to keep going to see if it could get any worse, and it did, time after time after time, absolute rubbish.

The guys of the law firm are reminiscent of ex. Asshole Trump. Lie. Lie. And if they don’t believe you, lie some more. Eventually lies become truths if they lie enough.