The Devil's Bargain Ch. 13

- "Neither did I, until I had to do it."

Gabrielle finally smiled. "Here I thought that I might break your heart - and there you are, giving me good advice."

- "Were you planning to offer me sex? 'One last time' - that sort of thing?"

- "What?" She sputtered for a moment. "Why would you say that?"

- "Your bra strap is showing. It's a bit odd to wear your sexiest bra for a breakup."

She was stunned, but only for a second. Then Gabrielle laughed. She laughed hard.

- "I have so much to learn about breakups." she said.

- "Not really." I said. "You were going to let me down easy, and try to make me feel good about myself. You were even prepared to send me on my way with fantastic sex. You could write a book about how breakups should be done."

Gabrielle and I shared a moment of understanding. We had both had our hearts broken, in the past. Neither of us had much experience in the opposite role. Her lip quivered, just a little.

- "I'm going to miss you, Dan. I understand why you can't come with me - it would be the same as me being here. And ... you have commitments. But I really wish ..."

She kissed me. It wasn't a goodbye kiss. No - definitely not your typical breakup. Gabrielle kissed me some more, and then her hand brushed across the front of my pants, discovering my rapidly-swelling cock.

She moaned softly, then took me by the hand, and led me to her bedroom. We had a bit of a challenge, trying to undress each other without breaking our kiss. Then it became a wrestling match. I think that I could have won, but I was willing to settle for a tie, which became a 69, with both of us lying on our sides.

We came almost simultaneously, which is something of a rarity, outside of stories. Gabrielle turned around, so that we could lie face to face. She'd swallowed my semen, and my face was covered in her juices, but we kissed again.

- "Best breakup ... ever." I whispered.

Gabrielle punched me in the shoulder - but she laughed, too. "Get used to it." she said. "I'm not leaving until the end of February. We'll have to breakup many more times before then."

We did. Gabrielle saw no reason why we shouldn't make love at every opportunity; I saw no reason to disagree with her. We saw each other more regularly, and had sex more often than we had before Christmas. Nor was it all recreational sex; Gabrielle seemed intent on showing me how much she cared for me, and making me regret the fact that she was leaving.

She succeeded. Just before she finally left, I invoked the broken heart clause.

***

Mom had her third stroke at the end of March. I was at work at the time. I came home to find her on the couch. The TV was on; she looked to be asleep.

My first reaction was anger, but I soon came to see it as a blessing. The death of a loved one can be difficult, but I can't say that Mom ever really loved me - or I her. Her will was proof of that. She left me the house, and 10% of her money (about $40,000). The rest of her money went to distant relatives she hadn't seen in years, and to her Church (which she also hadn't seen in years).

I spent a lot of the money she'd left me on her funeral. A few of her friends turned up: three old ladies, and an elderly couple (the guy wanted to tell me how cute Mom had been when she was younger). Sylvia the cleaning lady also came, with her daughter. There were a dozen or so other members of her congregation there, including the organist and the reader.

But it was heart-warming to see who else showed up.

Six of my colleagues from work came, including Sandra, the new intern, Josh, Pete and Brenda. Josh was still looking for the perfect girlfriend, but Brenda seemed to be very satisfied with Pete, and he was happier than a pig in shit.

Sue came, with Ron, Tracy & Jeff. Willy wasn't getting around so well, and Tanya was still a self-absorbed bitch, but the core of the dog-walkers had come. I caught up on the adventures of Gucci and Izzy, and everyone commiserated with me about Freya. Sue hugged me - and so did Ron.

Gabrielle came. She looked radiant - magnificent, even. She'd only been home for a few weeks, and she already had two jobs: one was a PR position, and the other was a guest spot on sports radio. Her family had welcomed her back with open arms, and old friends were re-connecting.

- "Boyfriend?"

- "No. Not too many guys can match you, Dan." she said. "I will have to be very patient." Gabrielle stayed close to me - for emotional support, obviously, but also because she knew no one else at the funeral.

I was stunned to see Holly there. She looked spectacular.

- "I'm so sorry, Dan." she said.

- "I can't believe you're here."

- "I'll always be there for you, Dan. You know that."

The Bennetts came - another surprise. My old neighbours George and Anna came, too, with their daughter.

- "Lisa?"

- "I should have come when Freya passed." she said.

- "I'm glad that you're here."

- "I feel as though I let you down."

- "Never." I said. "How's Paul?"

- "Working on a paper." she said. "He should have come."

- "He didn't know Mom at all - and he's only met me once. He wouldn't know anybody here except you guys."

- "Still." said Lisa. "Is that Gabrielle? By the kitchen? I wanted to meet her."

I looked around. "By the door? How many six foot tall hockey players are over there? Come on - I'll introduce you. Oh - just so you know: she's moved back home, to Quebec."

- "I'm sorry to hear that." said Lisa. She did sound genuinely sorry.

- "It's okay. She wasn't happy here. And I'm glad that she's back with her family and friends."

I performed the introductions. I shouldn't have been surprised to see them obviously connecting. In fact, less than two minutes later, Gabrielle took Lisa by the arm and led her into the next room.

Virtually everyone at the wake came back to our house - my house, now, I suppose - for food and drink. That would be coffee for some, beer or wine for others, and scotch for George and Ron, who were discovering quite a bit of common ground.

Holly was circulating, making sure that everyone got what they wanted. Gabrielle and Lisa were in the kitchen, keeping the supply chain unbroken while also handling special requests.

I was coming back in through the front door, having just helped two of Mom's older friends into their son's car. Sue met me just outside the door.

- "Hey." she said. "I, ah ... we really miss you. You and Freya. It's not quite the same without you."

- "Thanks." I said. "I miss you guys too. Well ... maybe not Tanya, so much."

- "I, ah ... I tried to call Aarti - to let her know. But the number she gave me was 'no longer in service'."

- "Thank you for trying. That was thoughtful of you."

Sue smirked. "Yeah ... I just wanted to say ... (those three dots lasted a full five seconds) ... I'm sorry. I fucked up."

- "You put your Mother first. I can totally understand that."

- "No." said Sue. "You were right. I let you slip to the bottom of my to-do list." She looked up at me. "I should have done you a lot more often."

She seemed to need one, so I gave her a hug. "Thank you, Sue. You didn't have to tell me that - but I appreciate it."

- "You're a sweet guy, Dan. Tell me something: is it true that you and Miss Hockey Canada broke up?"

- "Gabrielle has moved back to Quebec, yes."

- "Gabrielle. Right, sorry. But you're not moving, are you?"

- "I don't have any plans at the moment."

Sue nodded. "Good to know." Then she kissed me on the cheek, and went back inside.

Some people left sooner - the Bennetts, Josh, Tracy and Jeff. George and Ron were trading stories of their respective neighbourhoods (a few of which involved me). Anna was rolling her eyes, listening to George as he simultaneously bent Pete's ear. She gave me a very nice hug.

- "Have you been in the living room lately?" she asked.

I took the hint. But I made the mistake of walking right in, instead of peeking around a corner. There they were: Holly, Lisa, Brenda, Sue, and Gabrielle. Oh, dear - if Aarti and Monica had been here ...

- "Speak of the Devil ..." said Brenda, of all people. She got up off the couch, and came over to give me a full body hug. "How's Pete doing? He's our designated driver."

I took advantage of the opportunity, and followed Brenda toward the kitchen. She turned and stopped me, though.

"It's okay, Dan. We were just ... comparing notes. I didn't know that there were so many other women that loved you like I did."

Oh.

"Hey, Pete - you 'bout ready to go?" she said.

- "Whenever you like." He looked grateful to be rescued from the Ron and George show.

Brenda gave me a hug. "Don't be a stranger." she said.

- "Yeah." said Pete. "Don't forget about us."

I promised not to.

Sue performed the next public service, by getting Ron to leave with her. Lisa and Gabrielle immediately began cleaning up, and Holly pitched in. Despite my protests, the three of them shooed me out of the way. That left me with George and Anna.

- "Can you join us for dinner on Friday?" Anna asked me.

- "You don't have to do that."

- "Of course we don't." said George. "But for some inexplicable reason, we enjoy your company. Just humour us and show up, okay?"

Anna was taking another, longer look at Gabrielle and Holly.

- "You have been out with some beautiful women, Dan." she said.

- "I've been telling you that for years!" said George. "But you never believe me. You just call me an old perv."

- "Because you are an old perv." said his wife.

Since one of those beautiful women was their daughter, and since I was just about the same age as George, I thought it wiser to say as little as possible.

My three ex-girlfriends cleaned up the place in no time. Yeah, it felt weird to even think that. But soon enough, the job was done, and my old neighbours started saying their goodbyes. George and Anna headed out to their car, letting me walk Lisa to the door.

- "Again," she said, "I'm sorry that I wasn't here when Freya passed."

- "No. I should have let you know sooner - but I wouldn't have wanted you to make the trip. I'm really glad that you're here now, though."

- "Anytime you need me." she said.

Lisa held me a little longer than necessary, and then gently kissed my cheek.

- "Safe trip home." I said.

- "I am home." she said, with a smile. "But I know what you mean."

I went back to the kitchen slightly dazed.

- "Wow." said Holly. "I had no idea she was so pretty."

- "No kidding." said Gabrielle. "But so were Brenda and Sue."

- "Hah." I said. "There's a case of the pot and the kettle calling ... ah, other things that are black ... black."

- "You silver-tongued devil." laughed Holly.

- "I don't know," said Gabrielle, "I only went out with him for his looks."

They had a good little shared chuckle at my expense.

- "Really, though, Dan, "said Holly, "how is it that all of your ex-girlfriends are knockouts?"

- "Present company included." said Gabrielle, with a nod to Holly.

- "Obviously." said Holly, with a flourish in Gabrielle's direction. "And a few are missing, but Sue assured us that Aarti - did I get her name right? - was stunning. George was kind enough to supply a few more names, and some enthusiastic descriptions. You seem to have been with quite a few women."

- "Nine." I said. "Nine, since Connie died. Ah - no. Ten. Sorry." For some reason, I kept forgetting to include Angel. Nine women that I'd used the magic phrases on, and her.

- "You almost forgot one?" said Holly.

- "Well ... it was just one night." Oh, dear. Why was I still talking? Everything I said only made it worse.

- "Ooh - a one-night stand? This I definitely want to hear about."

- "Me too." said Gabrielle.

Now, there are very different customs for funerals and wakes around the world. Some cultures like a lot of crying and drama, with the wife of the dead man competing with his mistress(es) to show their passion and devotion by throwing themselves into the open grave.

I'm part Irish, and I have to admit that I like their traditional model. The dead person (Grandpa Sean, say) is laid out on a bed, or propped up in a corner to make room for the dancing. You must have a fiddler. But you also have keeners - these are professional female mourners, who can wail and cry with the very best (generally, they get a 10 minute break every hour, to rest their facial muscles and vocal cords - plus free drinks). You tell stories about old Sean, you drink, and you dance. It's a celebration of life.

Now if Mom's religion was correct, and she was already in heaven, looking down and watching her own wake, she would have no doubt been very upset.

Holly and Gabrielle both wanted to know about Angel. And then about each and every one of the others - the Nine. Oh no - now I was going to think of them as the nine riders. There was no escape, either: both Holly and Gabrielle were staying overnight - it would have been crazy for them to rent hotel rooms when we had plenty of space here. But that also meant that I was trapped.

Holly and Gabrielle had been 'comparing notes' (as Brenda put it), with Lisa, Brenda and Sue. They were all particularly interested in why they had agreed to go out with me, given the age difference, and their lack of a pre-existing interest (with the exception of Lisa, Sue, and, surprisingly, Brenda).

- "I mean, I knew who he was." said Holly. She was speaking to Gabrielle. "I thought he was good-looking, but I had this rule: never date co-workers. Future subordinates, future colleagues ... awkward either way. Then Dan asked me out, and I forgot all about my rule."

- "A romance was the last thing on my mind." said Gabrielle. "Especially with a client. That's a no-no. Then this handsome older man pops into my office, and asks me to go out with him. And I wanted to! I can't explain it."

- "So tell us, Dan." said Holly. "What's your secret?"

What could I possibly say? "Umm ... luck?"

- "Sue said that it took a long time for her to fall for you. But Lisa and Brenda say that you're the nicest, kindest man either of them has ever met."

- "They did." said Gabrielle. "But I still don't understand why I went out with you in the first place." She suddenly looked alarmed, and held out both hands. "Wait! I'm not saying that I regret it. I agree with them. You're the nicest man I've ever been with. I just don't know how we got started, because you can't tell how nice a person is right away."

A few drinks later, we got a bit maudlin. Holly regretted having put her job first; Gabrielle was happy to have moved home, but sad that I couldn't have come with her. She knew better than to ask me to give up my job and move. Young romantics believe that true love triumphs over all. Unfortunately, if I sacrifice everything to be with you (and your family, your home town, your friends) it rarely works out - just as Gabrielle had sacrificed to be with Eric.

- "Thank you." I said. "Thank you both, for being here. It means a lot to me."

The three of us had had plenty to drink, and plenty to eat. It had been a long day, and I wanted to see everyone settled before I passed out. I put Gabrielle in the guest room, because she had been the first to confirm that she was coming. Then I gave my Holly my room, because I didn't think that either of them would be too keen to sleep in Mom's room.

That didn't bother me at all. I had cleaned it thoroughly, and she hadn't died there.

It had been an extraordinary day. Five of my former lovers had come to show support. Even though I wasn't with any of them anymore, they all still cared enough - Lisa had come from Victoria, Holly from Calgary. Sue had swallowed her pride, and admitted that she'd made a mistake. I could hardly complain about that.

I lay on my back, counting my good fortune on my fingers. I'd been very fortunate to have these wonderful women in my bed (or my couch), and in my heart. I thought so often in terms of sex - yet here they'd been, at a funeral and wake, to show me that they cared. I was lucky. Luckier than I deserved.

The door to Mom's bedroom swung open, and a near-naked woman came in, clad only in a scandalously diaphanous nightie. It took me a few seconds to realize who it was.

- "Holly ...?"

- "Sshh ..." She climbed onto my bed, and lay down beside me. "You don't have to do anything. Just let me ... hold you."

I hadn't forgotten Holly's spectacular body. She snuggled up, pressing her wonderful breasts into my back. I didn't miss the heat of her crotch as she swung her legs under my ass to spoon me.

"You can sleep, if you want. I'm just here to ... comfort you."

I was incredibly lucky. But as she cuddled and wrapped me up, I couldn't help my own natural reaction. Holly felt me shift, as I tried to conceal it.

"Get comfortable any way you like." she said. Her hand was on my hip. She slid it over my stomach, trying, I suppose, to help me get settled. That was when she brushed against my stiffening and lengthening erection.

"Oh." Holly wrapped her fingers around my cock. "Hmm ... not quite ready to sleep? You can ... turn around, if you want."

I probably hesitated for a second or two. I wasn't really in the mood for athletics - or plain fucking. But a hard cock rarely worries about moods, or reservations. I turned over to face her.

- "Could we just ... make love?" I asked.

Holly smiled. "That's why I'm here. Whatever you want."

***

Gabrielle left late the next morning. She kissed me, and held me tight.

- "I waited too long." she said. "I should've gone to your room sooner."

My eyebrows rose. "You ...?"

- "I hope that she made you feel good."

- "I sure did." said Holly, who was eavesdropping.

- "Good." said Gabrielle. She looked me in the eye. "Don't be a stranger. Keep in touch, alright?"

- "You too."

- "I will."

Holly's flight was later in the day. I offered to drive her to the airport, but she insisted on calling a cab.

- "You look like you need a rest." she said. "You should consider a vacation. A skiing trip? I've got a connection at Jasper ..."

- "Thank you, Holly." I said. "You were wonderful yesterday - and last night."

- "Think about what I said, Dan. Please?"

- "I will."

Holly kissed me one more time, and then I walked her out to her taxi.

Then she was gone. I was alone - for the first time in twenty-two years.

***

No Freya to walk. No Mom to look after. Just a big empty house that wasn't really mine. Strangely enough, I didn't feel all that lonely. That might come, soon enough, but for now I was basking in the warmth generated by my ex-lovers.

Holly was an excellent choice on my part. I felt a little guilty that I'd never used the 'broken heart' clause on her; was she still somehow attached to me because of the magic? Six - almost seven years later, she was still lovely, excellent company, and seriously sexy.

Would Monica have turned up if she knew? I think she might have. What if Sue had managed to reach Aarti? Yes, she would have come.

Kim would have needed a lot of guts (or balls) to face Josh and me. Alanna? Who knows? It might have been an opportunity for her to network.

That sounds cynical. In reality, I was feeling undeservedly loved. Five of my former lovers had come. None of them bore me a grudge for our breakups. I'd been incredibly lucky so far.

I had five more uses of the magic phrases remaining. I was about to turn forty-nine. It was growing increasingly creepy for me to be considering women in their twenties - but I didn't know any women close to my own age that I was even remotely interested in.

And then I had a thought. Several thoughts in a row, actually. I wasn't ready to choose another woman; that matter deserved a great deal more reflection before I pulled the trigger again.