All Comments on 'The Devil's in the Detail'

Jenny loves Nick, is carrying Nick's child, and is horny as hell. So why does Hazel think moving her sister in will make the relationship between Jenny and Nick weaker? Either Nick and the two sisters will all come to love and want each other more, or Jenny and Nick will get closer while Hazel becomes jealous and distant. It is implausible that Jenny and Nick will come to dislike each other, they've known each other for years. And now they share a child.

But let's be honest, if there is no God, then there is no soul, so the life of an unborn child has no inherent value or status if the mother does not want it. So why doesn't Jenny just get an abortion? Ugly, but realistic. It would follow from your plot and character profiles that Jenny wants Nick's baby, and Hazel appears to support Jenny's wish. Moving her in will really cement a 3-way relationship, or probably destroy one of those relationships. I just wonder if you are up to writing that story.

Maybe a part 2 wasn't a good idea...The problem in this part 2 was: Sure he should have come clean with his wife about what happened...As soon as he found out the woman was his in-law...But in this part 2 no one (not even his wife) said or took any action about her sister: she knew from the first second that it was him and no other man...And she didn't said anything and cheated on her sister...And even after knowing she was pregnat she didn't took any action: like abortion...No she chose to have the child, a single mother already with one daughter...So all the guilty was put on his shoulders and none in the sister's...Is this fair? Didn't he felt himself wronged and condemn for an act that the only error he did was not to come clean as soon as he found out? Soon or later this arrangement will destroy someone...Last: Shouldn't she be saying the following to her sister and not to her husband: "But make no mistake, if you put your pussy in my husband again, there will be hell to pay."? 2*

Tied up some loose ends and teased us about what might possibly happen next. Poor old Nick has his hands full! Five star story-telling!

The tail end of the story raises a fascinating question. A wife permits her husband to share his love between her and another woman (in this case her sister), but not to have penetrative sex with the other woman. Why not? What difference would penetration make?

L

I really liked it -- 5*

Well wrien, thoughtful tale. I love it. xoxoxox Annette

Is there some major holiday at the start of August or end of July? This really seems to be setting up some continuation for when the kids are born.

Very enjoyable and fun. Thanks.

Like the idea Nick is under the Gun but it would seem a 3rd Chapter should be forth coming. What happens when they Live together. Sister's can be Allies or Enemy's at the same time. Making it tough on Nick.

It's been said there are only 14 different plots in Loving Wives and they have all been done to death. Thanks for proving them wrong.

oppinion polls don't "confirm" a damn thing. Polls indicate that a vast majority of people belive in a god even if they aren't religious.

I am sorry but I completely disagree. People do not believe in God in the Christian world as they actually use it for covenience rather than real belief. Other relegions, seem much more extreme and I would gather that your stats may be true. However in my opinion relegion is the root of all evil. So many killed in the name of relegion, something that was invented in the prehistoric days to keep the masses down. No place in the modern world. This world WILL NEVER move on until relegion disappears.

Re this story, excellent and 4*

Poor guy doesn't have a clue. His best course of action for the next thirty years will be to always say, "Yes dear." Will be interesting if Hazel lets Jenny and him push out another rug rat or two. Five stars from me!

A nice story; but the cast of commenters has gone off the rails like the clown troupe at last Saturday's SC debate. It does not help to apply U.S. stats to a UK story. FYI, "belief in god" runs at 37% in UK (about like the author suggested) and 27% in France; whereas across the whole EU, it is 51%. Meantime, the U.S. has some discrepancy between those who claim generalized belief in god at 89% and those who feel "certain of god" at only 63%. Obviously, the U.S. has higher religiosity than Europe but its older European-American population is trending toward Europe; it is the new immigrants, especially from Mexico, Central America, and Africa that slow the trend due to their high religiosity.

That Hazel would be so accepting of the fact that her husband has impregnated both sisters. I'm thinking he shouldn't be sleeping under the same roof with her if he values his dick. Just too improbable a story to be any good.

1 star.

I read the comments before the story, and thought this had something to do with God and/or atheism. It's funny how readers can (and do) hyper-focus on a throwaway line.

This is a very well-written story with a unique plot, but I found the ending to be less than satisfying. The whole situation was resolved in a way that was a little too neat and clean to be believable. There would have been far more angst and drama if this happened in real life (although I'm guessing this has probably never happened in human history, so we'll never know.)

Still, it's a good effort, and much appreciated.

The plot was a natural extension of the previous story. The characters are not really very attractive.... not enough details.

.....delving more into the characterization. It seemed to me that many of the explanations for actions were "brush offs", not really addressing the question with a complete answer, but throwing back an abbreviated, even terse response to avoid really addressing the underlying concerns.

Maybe that's another difference between British writers and their culture and American writers and their culture.....but I'd like to get to know each of the three main characters a little more, before we're dealing with two squawking babies, two exhausted mothers and one deeply distraught and overwhelmed father of said babies........so that if they end up in a polygamous marriage or just the three of them cohabitating as a "newsagent" family, we'll at least be able to relate to them and their motivations. Same thought if they go their separate ways or if it ends with acrimony.....

I appreciate your care in your writing/editing, as I can offer no complaint about any of that. My grasp of the Queen's English, may not be as complete as it should be, so I cannot speak to that with much authority. But it is simpler to say there was nothing noteworthy to criticize you for in the spelling, punctuation, or grammar....allowances made for the obvious differences.

Thank you...looking forward to the next installment.

One part of me agrees with those who claim that it goes against human nature for Hazel to accept what happened.

The other part says that she DOES love both her husband and her sister, and what happened IS believable.

In any case, it's pretty obvious that her sister carries most of the blame, since SHE knew what was happening, and could have put a stop to it before it went to far, and bringing her into the home is CERTAINLY a mistake!

So we know how they got into this predicament, but how does it all resolve? You have an odd habit of leaving out some of the most compelling and interesting parts of your stories. Lack of imagination, or just a short attention span?

You certainly have more talent than your stories contain.

here we put the Hen in the Fox Abode. TK U MLJ LV NV

Sooner or later things would probably change as their would be way too much temptation for it not to break down inhibitions.

You don't have to believe in god to be anti-abortion in general, or to be pro-choice but to choose not to abort.

With most of your other stories I understood & put up with your sudden endings. This time however I feel your doing a great disservice to, this story, your readers & lastly yourself. You're a very good writer, certainly one of the best newer authors on LW but I really feel you need to further explore & expand this tale. I hope you agree & we see a sequel. 5 *****

The sisters cannot live in the same house with the husband without jealousy and angst. The only way it can work out is both women agree that they will share hubby.

The Mormons have been doing it for years, successfully. As a Polyamorous relationship the shared love would be a good environment for the children.

Excellent follow up story. I like the warning at the end- refreshingly honest and clear. So, I wonder how the year together went? There’s room for a conclusion, I think.

I'm glad you kept the depth of the necessary suspension of disbelief to a minimum.

However, after the planned year of cohabitation perhaps the sisters will admit "the hurly burly's done, the battle's lost or won." (Sorry Will).

It was a worthy sequel to the original.

I actually thought the wife's reaction was plausible, as she evidently believed that Nick had no idea of the mix-up at the time, and there were no repeats. The sisters were also clearly close, so the wife understood it was a drunken mistake from Jenny's side and wasn't an attempt to steal/seduce her husband.

A part three would be interesting. I can't see Jenny falling out of love with Nick if she's having his baby...

If I were the guy, I would be pissed off to no end. First at the sister for deceiving me that night and then at my wife for allowing her to move in. In essence, he was sexually assaulted that night by the sister.

If it were me, I would put my foot down and tell my wife she is not living there. I would offer to pay for an abortion for the sister. If those two things were not met, I would probably press Sexual Assault Charges on the sister and obtain a restraining order against her with the police and move out of my home until the sister left. If my wife chose the sister (who is responsible for all of this and cheated on her sister), I would start Divorce proceedings as well. Likewise, I would be asking for full custody of BOTH the unborn children.

Sorry, but it would be too much of a mess in the future and the drama would always be on epic levels.

...nah, pro'lly comin' in your fist :)

I don't know what story YOU read, but there was NO 'assault'

"I threw off my cape, crawled on top of her and started nuzzling her neck again. 8< 8<...I nuzzled and nibbled and she mewled in delight .... 8< 8< 8< ... so I flipped her onto her stomach, lifted her skirt, pulled her thong aside, got my cock out and was inside her before you could say bingo!"

and certainly before SHE could have said 'Yes'! Ha ha ha!

".. I would probably press Sexual Assault Charges on the sister and obtain a restraining order against her...

I'm sure, lol! You don't "...obtain a restraining order against her with the police .."; you generally get them from the Court.

Hey, 'cumminginsideyourfist", you can take an ESL class, inexpensively, usually at your local High School. Then you can keep up with the big dogs who write in English.... :) :) :)

Did we read the same story here? It said that the sister thought he knew . . . and with good reason, he'd been left a message, and frankly, the 'I didn't recognize you through the heavy makeup' excuse, while possible, is not something she (or most people) are likely to believe . . . and she really had NO reason to believe that was the case at the time.

Further, he swept her up quickly, giving her little time to say much of anything anyway. So 'in essence' if you wish to use that and the idea he was 'sexually assaulted', remember, she did NOT initiate, he went after her. She just didn't object to the assault, because she loved him and thought he knew it was her and loved her. Unless it stated somewhere that she was a mind-reader . . . it's pretty much as it was written . . . for once not a choice, but a mistake. . Only if you're one of those people who think when a woman is 'sexually assaulted', it's her own fault, can you put this on her. By the way, trying to sue the woman YOU swept up and took to bed and whom YOU instigated sex with) who only cooperated because she thought you knew what you were doing and that you were in love with her . . . do you really think that would fly in court . . . seriously??

I'd also disagree though that technically, this even fell into the realm of 'sexual assault' . . . it was mistaken identity, and wishful thinking . . . but he was still the real instigator.

What an ending!!!! Did NOT see that one coming!! Great read.

"The Witching Hour" was perfect as told. This complicated mess was not needed. Still good enough as it's own story.

Or has a great sense of humor as a lightning bolt didn't send you both straight to hell. I was raised Baptist, probably a good thing right this moment that I've fallen away since I laughed so hard I had to wipe my eyes. A bit nervous though considering the weather here in San Antonio for the last week or so.

"If God exists, He must be puzzled by our behaviour. We don't bother to pray to Him, but then we spend a lot of time having fun in bed and shouting out His name. "Oh God, oh God, oh God..." shouted Hazel. If He was listening He probably thought it was a prank call. "Oh God, oh God, oh God, fuck me, fuck me, fuck me." God didn't answer the call that evening, but it seems I was a good substitute for Him."

"But make no mistake, Nick, if you put your cock in my sister again, there will be hell to pay." I suppose no blowjobs either, but does that mean he can't eat her or get a handjob? How about a titty fuck? Don't care what others say, this begs for Chapter 3. Signed: BTW

Indeed. You sometimes confuse September 25th with December 25th.

Great inside joke!

Conceived on dec 25 = born on sept 25.

That ended much better than I thought it would.

"Jenny knew the guy she had slept with ..." Of course she did; she had his room key!

I loved the little twist at the end.

My forgotten sequel and a good one.

He is in SO much trouble. A totally different hell as penance. He'll probably have to lotion Jenny's belly so she won't get stretch marks.

Welll written, plausible plot. Possibly a bit light on passion. But hey, you can’t have everything in life, including an ongoing relationship with your sister-in-law - or can you?

Oh poopyHazel…. Cats outta the bag, let your sister bone hubby a couple days a week

Very entertaining! Thank you!

An entertaining piece of nonsense. Pandering to two pregnant women - sisters at that - nowhere to hide, nowhere to run and sterophonic nagging. Hell might be a better option.

LA

Poor Nick, he can't pee in his sister-in-law anymore...

Greed is a horrible vice. Nonetheless, I want a third helping of Hazel, Jenny and Nick please. How does living together work out for them?

Now that was a story, not the ending I expected but a good one

at least 3 more stories there

THis is a recipe for disaster, having both women in the same house. Not going to end well if there is an expection of hands off with Jenny.

I really would love to hear how this plays out. Cries out for a follow-on.

A good story and a great sequel. Perfect closing sentence to wrap up the story. Having said that, if you ever do decide to write more about these 3 engaging characters, I’d love to read it. :) 5 ⭐️

Plus: You avoided the standard LW polyamory gambit

Minus: Moving Jenny in with them may head in that direction anyhow, despite what Hazel says.

At least they didn’t divorce over a night of mistaken identity.

I think he was set up by his wife (and Jenny), Saturday night! His behavior was easy to predict, given the come-ons.

Especially in Red US states, single mothers need to be on birth control.

that was about as painless as that scenario could go.

I'll go with the male fantasy of the sisters later agreeing to share him