The Douche Valve Kit

There was another surprising occurrence when as we lay in bed in post-coital bliss -- Vivian still drunk. Unsolicited she started complaining about her husband. If what she said was true hers wasn't just a marriage of convenience -- it was devoid of love or even respect for at least a decade, and almost sexless. Her statement just before she finally fell asleep "You're infinitely a better mate that he is" warmed my heart.

Fucking her in the early a. m. in the spoon position that night was even better than normal. Fortunately, she remembered almost nothing of her complaints about her husband when we woke up since it would have been awkward for her if she had remembered.

On the plane ride home we both were wistful as we did our best to snuggle and have body contact without being too obvious. After we got our luggage and while her limo was waiting for her at the curb I kissed her and whispered "I had the best week of my life; thank you."

Hard-ass attorney Vivian Foster started crying. She said nothing, quickly kissed me, and then was gone.

***********

Although on our trip we continued to call each other Mr. Curtain and Mrs. Foster -- Vivian said that it was naughtier that way -- once we started talking on the phone when we got back we called each other Dale and Vivian. We talked about every third day for at least a few minutes, and even went to a movie together one Sunday afternoon -- with only a couple of light pecks on the lips.

Then about five weeks after we got back on a Saturday morning Vivian called. Instead of her normal pleasant greeting she started out with "You didn't have your temporary vasectomy reversed before our trip, did you?"

I had no idea what she was talking about. "There is no such thing as a temporary vasectomy, and I never had a vasectomy of any kind," I replied.

"I saw a document saying that in the divorce papers your attorney filed," she sniped.

Then it suddenly hit me; the fake document I had prepared to get Haley to admit to who her paramour was. I had forgotten all about it, and I certainly didn't remember -- or authorize -- my attorney including that with any court papers -- and why was Vivian looking at court papers anyway?

I explained the origin of the document which resulted in Vivian sniffing "Oh shit; it may be morning sickness," and then she hung up.

I tried to call her back, but she didn't answer.

Sunday afternoon there was a bold knock on my door. It was Vivian. When I opened the door she stormed in, and waved a piece of paper at me -- the results of a pregnancy test -- and cried out "I'm pregnant you bozo!"

"Is Harold the father?" I quietly asked

"Harold and I haven't had sex in three months, and he's had a real vasectomy so I don't use birth control pills or shots; whereas you, on the other hand, probably pumped a couple of gallons of high sperm-content fluid into me on our Aruba trip," she replied and then started crying.

I sat her down on the couch in my living room and hugged her. "What am I going to do," she kept mumbling.

"You won't consider an abortion, will you?" I sheepishly asked. "I mean it's totally your decision..."

She cut me off. "I represent the biggest pro-life organization in the entire fucking country; how do you thing that would play if I had an abortion?"

I held her shoulders and looked her in the eye. "Fuck your marriage of convenience; marry me; we'll raise our kid together."

"Did you get me pregnant on purpose?" she yelled, and then slapped me.

I held her tight; "I assumed that you were on birth control; I never expected the document I faked to ever be seen by anyone else except for Haley. I certainly didn't get you pregnant on purpose but I just as certainly will not abandon you; I'll do everything I can to help."

I don't know how that discussion led us to my bedroom, but it was probably only fifteen minutes after she slapped me when we were again rutting like a pair of bonobos on my bed. After our highly satisfying mutual orgasms, her eyes now dry of tears, she said "I've missed you."

"You have no idea how much I've missed you," I replied.

*************

It was lucky that Vivian agreed to jettison her marriage of convenience after further discussion, because like only about 10% of women her libido increased significantly during her pregnancy. She was like a bitch in heat all of the time. We both even came "home" to my house during the middle of the work day a couple of times for vigorous fucks.

Vivian was seven months pregnant by the time that her divorce was final and we got married in a simple ceremony. Her ex-husband wasn't invited, her oldest son didn't come (I wonder why), but her youngest one did and was happy for her because he had always counselled her to find happiness instead of living in a loveless marriage.

************

Epilogue

It's now five years after Vivian delivered our beautiful, bright, precocious little girl Veronica. Vivian still works hard, but takes time for me and Veronica, and is a great mom and wife. Although it hurts her to admit it she has more fun with her little girl than she did with her boys when they were younger. Her younger son Sean and I actually have a good relationship. My relationship with Winston is awkward at best, and will never even be decent, but we are able to work around it.

Vivian made a concerted effort to stay in her granddaughter Amy's life -- that's what Haley named her little girl who is primarily cared for by her maternal grandparents, although Haley does have somewhat of a role beyond financial. It turns out that five year old Veronica and almost six year old Amy (yeah, Vivian has a granddaughter older than her own daughter) are very good friends and we get them together for overnights at least twice a week. Haley's parents are very generous in that regard, and I think anxious for a break for a couple of days a week because Amy is a very active child. Winston has essentially no role in her life, although once in a great while he is around when Veronica and Amy are playing together.

Haley and I have no relationship whatsoever. She believes -- but can't figure out how -- I had something to do with her getting pregnant, and since she cheated on me I want nothing to do with her.

I never have been anything but loving toward Amy; it isn't her fault that her mother was a cheater, and I treat her almost as well as I treat Veronica ("almost").

I now have a great life; a child that I love with all my heart, a wife who is the love of my life, and sex that is better than any man has a right to expect.

All because I verified my trust (or lack thereof) after buying a douche valve kit, and took bold action afterword.