The Fickle Finger of Fate

But that only left me with an even more terrifying thought, and this one saddened me a damn sight more, so I decided to call her bluff, and sighed, "Ohhh my dear you are good, but not quite good enough and that isn't any reflection on your talents. I'll tell you why. To start with, my father has a saying, 'There are enough people in the world ready to fool you! You don't need to add to their treachery by fooling yourself!"

Michelle just sat there listening. "While I know I have faults, and probably more than I care to admit, I have been called among other things an anally retentive egotist. I am under no illusion as to my physical attractiveness to the opposite sex, and there are at least a couple of men here in this room who outshine me hands down!"

I went ahead and filled Michelle in on the last couple of months with my wife. I could see Michelle's eyes squint in concentration, then harden in recognition as she heard of the prenuptial and the kind of friends my wife was socialising with. "So what you're saying is that you believe your wife is trying to set you up?"

"In a nut shell my dear, if it weren't for that, I probably would have been clueless as to what you were up to! I am right, there is more to this evening then just pleasant dining company?"

Michelle stared at her hands clasped tightly in her lap, "Your suspicions are not unfounded Mr Barrymore!" When I should have been happy and smiling about my Sherlock Holmes powers of deduction, what she'd just said made my face dropped instead. "It looks as though the time has come to clear the air, so to speak! I'm with an agency that deals with cheating spouses. We put the bait in the trap and wait for the cheater to take it."

She could probably see my face cloud up in gathering annoyance. "Before you condemn me as a whore, I'd like to assure you that I haven't and will never actually bed any of the men I'm paid to seduce. The man over in the corner is my minder; he's here in case you, the mark gets, let's say, a little upset at being in that set up." I believe she threw that in, in case I was thinking of getting stroppy.

I nodded my understanding, surprised at myself that I was relieved that this creature of beauty wasn't a common whore after all. "Now I remember where I saw him last! It was here, and I was in a conversation with him when he gave up his stool when the woman, what was her name?" I clicked my fingers trying to remember. "Ahhh ... Sarah, yes Sarah, if my memory serves me correctly, when she arrived."

Michelle nodded. "Yes Mr Barrymore, her name is Sarah, and we work in pairs, it's safer and easier to shepherd the mark instead of us wasting time getting him by himself. Your wife contacted our agency with concerns that you may be having affairs when you were out of town on business. She gave us your picture and location, and the rest was up to us. This time she gave us your preference for tall blonde women, hence the reason I'm here. It seems as though we have both been set up?"

I grunted my assent. "So that explains why you never shortened my name like most people do. Sarah knew my preference for James, am I right?" Michelle smiled sheepishly and nodded. My mood had morphed from jovial to sad, to agro in minutes, but I managed to keep it out of my voice. "It confuses and pains me to think a woman such as you would undertake this sort of unsavoury employment? Why are you in such a sordid business?"

It was Michelle's turn to sigh. "You have just finished bestowing my physical qualities, and without wishing to appear any vainer than I really am, you have so graciously pointed out, I am just about damn near perfect, but..."

I nodded knowingly, "There is always a 'but' in there somewhere, isn't there?"

"You're right James. All this glamour, this artificial tinsel and wrapping comes at a price."

This statement surprised me; there was more to the vision than meets the eye, as pleasant as that vision was. This woman knew what was real and important. It didn't stop her from using her talents, but then don't we all! "Kevin, my minder over there is a prime example of that price. You said yourself that he out shines you in the physical looks department and you're right, he, like me can have just about any woman he sets his sights on."

Michelle dabbed at the corner of her eye with a tissue. She was getting upset, I wasn't sure why but I gave her time to settle. "But what comes along with that handsome and rugged good looking exterior is an ego and conceit that is just as ugly on the inside."

Michelle stopped as in thought, and then continued. "He is the atypical manifestation of the adage, 'Beauty is but skin deep, while ugly goes clear to the bone!' He falls into the Bad Boy category, and while that is sexy and desirable as hell for one-night stands or casual relationships, it's not a good trait to have for a perfect husband. When it comes to that, he can't hold a candle to you James, you beat him hands down!"

I watched as Michelle tried to reign in her emotions. A single tear again rolling down her cheek, and she removed it just as quickly with a delicate dab of her tissue. "Even with my beautiful good looks, I can't compete with that; even I can't hold their attention for long. That is where the double edge of my sword cuts both ways!"

Michelle took a little time to gather herself. "The men such as you, who are far more attractive on the inside, are so absolutely intimidated by my looks. I have been married twice to men as handsome as Kevin and my last partner no less so. Two marriages and one long-term relationship in ten years isn't a good track record James! All of them have strayed because they feel they can for one stupid reason or another. That's the main reason I'm in this business. I despise infidelity."

I sat pondering Michelle's confession, and truly felt for her plight. "I'm sorry I judged you unfairly Michelle. I have to admit to a certain amount of jealousy and it cuts me to the core having to admit to a failing as such."

Michelle smiled sadly. "What was it you said to Sarah? Don't beat yourself up over it. We all have crosses to bear, mine maybe a little easier than some. For what it's worth, I'm glad you stuck to you principles and didn't succumb to my charms. It gives me hope that there may just be a soul mate out there, even for me. I am right aren't I, that you haven't fallen, and were probably never in any doubt about it, were you?"

I dropped my head and grinned, she almost had me. "I have to tell you Michelle, that if I were to break my marriage vows, then you would be the only woman that could possibly have a chance to make me do it. I know that every man on this green atom we call earth would say that I'm certifiable for not going after you with a vengeance, but I have my principles and I will not corrupt them, even for you!"

"Just so you don't feel too slighted, if I hadn't worked out your motives by the time dinner was over, then I would have gone back to my room, and proceeded to beat my head up against the brick wall, cursing my principles in the process. Finding out has saved me from a severe headache." I chuckled.

Tears were falling freely from Michelle's chin, even as she chortled at my last statement. "Thank you James! Thank you for restoring my faith in love and the sanctity of marriage. I'm just sorry that it has come at such a high price for you." That statement hit me harder than I expected, having to admit that I wasn't actually thinking of my marriage while talking to Michelle. It bothered me that while I hadn't been physically adulterous, certainly my mind had strayed. I decided to leave it for some time when I had more time to contemplate.

Brightening a little at the averted crisis, twenty-five of my IQ points went back to ogling this immaculate creature, while the rest took pleasure in conversing with Michelle on many levels. Ever the optimist, I took solace in the fact that, although this dinner had just about crucified my trust in my ever-loving wife, at least I've had the chance to meet and converse with my dream girl ... such is life.

As our dinner wound down and Michelle prepared to leave, I took her hand and gave her a light kiss on the cheek. "I'll remember tonight for the rest of my life Michelle. In addition, if it makes you feel any better, I have to believe that your beauty is a tad deeper than skin, and if things were different, then I'd have liked nothing more than to find out just how far to the bone yours goes. I know it might sound strange, but thank you for a very pleasant evening."

Michelle's face brightened considerable as she stood and turned to go, before turning back to me smiling. "You know one of your qualities James?" I made a quick shake of my head and a shrug, "You're prodigious ability to make the people around you feel very special; Sarah commented on it to me before I came to meet you, and I have to agree with her. Kevin doesn't beat you by much in the looks department, James. But when it comes to personality and character, he is not even in the same book, let alone on the same page as you!" She winked and left, leaving me feeling good and sad at the same time.

I got back to my room and closed the door. I had kept my anger under control all evening as events had unfolded, mostly due to Michelle's charm and poise, but now I was alone and I let out my frustrations by picking up a glass and throwing it savagely at the wall.

"That fucking deceitful bitch!"

It was at Kelly that my anger was directed. I knew I had to make a phone call home, but I wasn't sure if I could hold it together. The last thing I wanted was to give the game away. I knew I still didn't have any proof, but the smoke was getting thicker by the minute and I needed something more than what I had, if I was to prove Kelly innocent or guilty of adultery. I needed to keep her in the dark as much as she had kept me. I fucking hate the mind games stupid people play, just to amuse themselves!

"Hi sweetie, how you doing?" I didn't trust myself with anything more than that to start with.

Kelly giggled and it was something that was now making me angry and sick to my stomach. "How do you think I'm doing? Are you going to be home as planned?" I felt like reaching through the phone and grabbing her by the throat.

Where did that come from? There would be only one reason she'd think that I wouldn't be home. Maybe she's thinking that I've hooked up with Michelle and have planned to stop an extra day? I needed time to get my cool back, so I made it sound that it wouldn't be tomorrow like I was striving for, but the next as planned, or the one after. "I'll call you when I know more, but you can count on at least two more days. Can you handle that sweetie?" I wanted to smash the phone to pieces as I said those words.

Kelly sounded like she was pouting over the phone but accepted my apology. "I suppose there's not much we can do about it. Just get home as soon as you can baby." That wasn't the Kelly I knew and things like this didn't just roll off her, like water off a duck's back. She should be damn well waterlogged and she should have bitched and complained. Her cavalier attitude to extending my trip was so uncharacteristic of her.

I felt a shudder at Kelly's endearment but managed to finish, "I will sweetie. I miss you my love; I'm very tired from work, and all I want to do is go to bed. I'll be home as soon as I can." Now that bit was the truth, having already finished my business here and planning to leave the first available flight out the following morning. With flight time and commuting, I should be home by lunch.

~...~

The following afternoon saw me walk into Lennard's office and throw a pair of sunglasses on his desk. "The man has returned, with good news I hope?" Lennard got out before he noticed the glasses. "What are these for James?" He queried as he picked them up at arm's length and held them to the window, looking though the lenses.

"Just letting you now the rose coloured glasses are off Lennard. I have a suspicion that you were more right than I had wanted to believe!"

Lennard's facial expression turned sour and he dropped the glasses into the waste paper basket beside his desk. "I thought you weren't going to be back for another day or so? You found out for sure then?"

I shook my head. "Not for certain, but I have grave doubts as to her fidelity; enough to put one of your boys on to her tail at least! How do you know that I wouldn't be back so soon?"

Lennard leaned back into his chair and laced his fingers on top of his head. "Ok James, the fickle finger of fate has flipped you the bird! That's not what's in question here. What you have to ask yourself is, do you lie down and accept it, or do you suck it up and get on with living? What are you going to do?"

Lennard hadn't answer my question, but he didn't always answer if he thought the question wasn't that important, so I was sure I'd find out if it was. "For a start I have to suck it up, go home and pretend I know nothing, just like the stupid ignorant bastard Kelly thinks I am, all the while finding an investigator to check out her movements. Damn that's going to be hard, and I don't know if I can keep it together until I find out what she's been up to. I was never any good at drama class at school. The last thing I want to be doing right now is pretending I'm clueless, and have to follow God knows who into bed with her!"

Lennard sat forward, dropped his hands and twiddled his thumbs, clearly agitated. "I might be able to help out there son." I just stared at him until he went on, "I took it on myself to do some checking for you. I knew you were too involved and in love to set the hounds on her, so I did it for you."

I sat down heavily as my legs gave way. Even as I was telling Lennard of my suspicions, I was secretly hoping that there was some plausible explanation that I hadn't thought of to explain everything that had gone on, but Lennard's demeanour reeked of finality. I had the feeling that all my misgivings were about to be confirmed, and it was with a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach, that I waited for Lennard to continue.

"I knew something wasn't right in paradise from your first trip."

Lennard seemed reluctant to go on, but I assured him that I appreciated his help. "My boy kept your wife under surveillance while you were away. While he didn't get any evidence of any foul play, she did spend an extraordinary amount of time over next door, with a lot of people coming and going. I wasn't sure what to make of it, so I did something that could quite possible get me in very deep shit if it got out. I put a tap on your phone line and that is where I got all the facts."

Lennard slid two cassettes across the desk to me. "We still don't have any photos of her doing anything, but these are the pictures of all the people who came and went while your wife was next door." Lennard said as he slid an envelope across the table.

I opened it and took a look at them. "Don't worry about the phone tap; I'll sign any authorisation you need for it. It's my phone, I pay the damn bills and I can tap it if I want." Looking at the photos, I quipped angrily, "That's the four alright, every last damn one of them, plus a couple of singles I met on different occasions. Did you listen to the conversations? Is that why you thought I was coming home tomorrow or the next day?

Lennard nodded his head. "Yeah I heard your conversation with Kelly last night. She immediately rang someone called Carol and set up a party for tonight next door at Pam's place. If you weren't coming home I was going to see if I could get some photographic evidence for you, though I know it was a long shot."

"My boy said that all the blinds were kept tightly shut, so getting anything would be problematic. It's up to you James, but if you don't want to wait, we can hit them tonight and you won't have to put on a front for her until you get some visual evidence."

I just sat in the chair and stared at my feet dejectedly. "Hell of a mess Lennard, one hell of a fucking mess! What did I do wrong?"

Lennard picked up the Perspex box on his desk and toyed with it. "I know James, and for what it's worth, you don't deserve it my friend; no one does. Don't go flogging yourself mate. From what I saw of the two of you, you treated her right, no question of that. She just got in with a bad crowd, and you can't be blamed for that either. She's not a child who needs a minder James; she needs to take responsibility for her own actions."

"You want to listen to the tape by yourself?"

"I don't know? You've already heard it, so it really doesn't make any difference, does it! You being here might stop me from destroying your office!" By the tone of my voice, Lennard knew that both were statements, not questions, and didn't bother replying.

Listening to the taped conversation was one of the hardest things I've ever done. The frivolity and contempt, the clear disrespect for me and our marriage made me so damn angry and sick at the same time.

It had occurred to me at one time that I was partly responsible for her fall from grace.

That was until her final phone conversation with Caroline. With every word out of Kelly's mouth, I could feel my love for her fade just that little bit more towards disappearing into obscurity.

"It took a couple of days before I got the tap installed on your first trip away." Lennard said, sliding a cassette into the player, bringing me back to the moment. "It's the Friday night before you returned on Saturday. It doesn't prove anything unless you know what they're talking about, and certainly nothing you can take to court." Lennard hesitated and asked again, "You sure you want to hear it?"

I looked at him. "Fuck no, Lennard. I don't want to fucking hear that my wife is fucking the entire fucking neighbourhood, but that's not my fucking call, now is it?"

Lennard for all his stony face facade, looked as though he was again thinking back to his marriage breakups. "I'm sorry Lennard; I should not have ripped into you like that."

Lennard's face, while still stony, had regret rippling across it. "That's okay mate. I understand perfectly where your head is. Hell of a thing to come to grips with, as you know, I've been there twice and I can tell you the second time wasn't any easier to handle than the first."

"You talk too much, just hit the fuckin play button, ya mongrel!" I looked up at him and he had a sad smile on his face.

"Hi Pam ... is everything ready for tonight?"

"Sure is, what time will you be over?"

"If he rings on time, then it'll be about the same as Wednesday night!"

My stomach tightened; the bitch didn't even wait one night to go off fucking God knows who. I remember what she said that evening back from my first trip, "You've got some work cut out for you to make up for three lonely nights I had to suffer through." Yeah right, I don't think she was so fucking lonely now!

"You're going to wear us out girl!"

"Just have those cards warmed up, and ready. I'm feeling lucky tonight!"

"Will do Kel. We'll be waiting."

Lennard hit the eject button. "That's all we got for your first trip, not much I know. The rest is yours and her call that night, nothing for the following day either. Would have been good to have the wiretap in place before you went, but I didn't want to say anything to you until I knew something definite. As I said to you before, it sounds like she going over for a game of cards, and that isn't necessarily infidelity material. If it weren't for the photos of all the players, then I wouldn't have continued with the tap."

Lennard slipped the second tape in. "This one is a little more damaging though." I was soon to find out that Lennard is prone to understatements of the devastating kind. He hit play and there was minor chatter to her mother and charities Kelly was involved in. Then came the conversation with me last night, then my world exploded in a mushroom of smoke.