The First Time Pt. 03

"Place them on the wall."

That firm voice, that confident voice, made me tremble as he spoke, my hands shaking with nerves. I did as he commanded, hearing him squirt out more shower gel. My palms opened, pressing against those tiles. The water ran off me, down my back, his manly hand caressing my bottom.

"Legs apart.."

The bathroom filled with steam and warmth from the shower spray. I shifted my stance slightly and I felt him easing my cheeks apart. I felt the need rise inside me. Different to what it was twenty minutes ago. I wanted him to touch me there, right now. With patience he caressed my ass, pulling it apart, harder and firmer each time, pushing it back together and then stretching me more and more each time. I closed my eyes realizing what he was doing, knowing what he was getting ready to do. My heart thumped with fright in my chest. Each thump made me tremble.

Then I felt it. The thing I had wanted for what seemed a life time. I felt his finger gently ease against my bum hole, and a realized he had lube on it. It felt cooler than shower gel. It felt more slippery. Velvety. I tried to sigh quietly, dismayed and aware of how I sounded the last time. Effeminate. Shameless.

I turned my head, so he could clearly hear me.

"Please. P-Please don't touch my bum-m." I heard my voice, full of fear, but also excitement as I told him what I wanted him to do to me. I swallowed hard at how I was behaving. Nothing initially felt so wrong, and yet so right.

I heard Mike groan as I said it, nodding. The satisfaction swelling inside me that I was playing by his rules, that I was obeying, telling him what I wanted. And I felt my cock, unashamed, hard and aching as he continued to massage one cheek, and lightly rubbed his finger up against my ass, rocking firm against it.

"You want me to do it, don't you?" Mike said toying with me, stopping for a second to slap my bottom, playfully. "You need it."

My hands, palms open, curled up slowly into fists. Trying to fight the rising panic inside me, my shaking inside me, full of apprehension. Trying to tell myself this is what I wanted, that I needed this, and I needed it now, while I still had the strength to stand. That I must not panic.

"Ple-ease, mercy," I said my voice fluttering. "I can't beg. I want t-to. But, please. Please don't make m-me beg."

I stood there passive, as he fondled my ass, caressed it and began to press firmly. I winced initially. It was a little painful, but it also felt good. I groaned loudly, bordering on whimpering. I could feel the relaxation in my ass, but I also felt the fear bordering on panic, making me pause, as my fists tightened harder against the tiles. The water cascading down my right side, I felt his lips tickle my neck on the left side. Mike's hands eased from caressing my ass and around to my rock hard cock and began to stroke it.

"Are you sure you can't beg?" His voice was firm but gentle.

He was teasing me! Teasing me like I am a toy!

I shook my head, the sudden feeling of being adored overwhelmed me. He applied pressure gently as he stroked my cock with a delicate hand. I closed my eyes and on instinct alone, my mouth trembled. He took a deep breath, and changed tact.

"You could say please don't. Please don't, Daddy."

My eyes flew open. I was horrified.

Daddy!?

I shook my head, as he probed me gently. Afraid at what he had just said, I felt myself tense, felt the pain much more than I was initially feeling. I opened my mouth to try and speak.

"Mercy."

Immediately he stopped. His finger withdrew while he continued his soft strokes on me.

"You don't like that term, baby?" he asked.

I shook my head. I was caught in place where it was still felt good, where I was wanting it, but this?

Daddy?

"No." I said, my voice wavering and faltering as I shook my head.

"Shh. It's okay. Shh," Mike said, trying to defuse my alarm. "It doesn't mean I want to be that." His laughter was light and full of mischief. I clearly heard him squirt out a bit more lube, as he continued, the fear almost rising to panic. "Daddy is a teacher. An educator." I felt him kiss my neck.

I whimpered listening to him, trying to shake my head. Trying to stop this. I could feel his finger, the coolness on the tips of them, slick with lube, gently applying pressure again.

"He guides and shows you what you can do." I swallowed hard listening to him, his explanation, it seemingly less frightening to me than it did a few seconds ago, somehow making sense. I felt his hand stop caressing my bum. "I can make you do the things you might have thought of." I felt his arm reach around from behind me, easing across my chest, holding me firm. "That's why he's gentle. That's why I would never hurt you."

That's why I was here! That's why I was saying please don't. I wanted him to teach me. I wanted him to worship me. I wanted him to hold my hand and guide me. From everything he had just said, calling him Daddy, is that a crime? I nodded, sort of blissfully confused, realization dawning on me.

"You love it when I praise you don't you, Baby?"

I nodded meekly as I felt his finger push against me, this time much harder. Rocking and bumping against my ass, increasing in its intensity, the pressure building, the resistance inside me beginning to fail again. My hips motioned forward, softly, in time with his probes, as I tried to lessen the building force. I felt his arm over my chest tighten. I felt trapped again, but this time I felt less fearful, less anxious. "You want me to adore you don't you? That's what Daddy does. He adores."

"Y-Yes," I said finally admitting it, as I leaned my head back on his shoulder, whimpering as his finger persuaded my ass to take him, as his kisses felt slightly hungrier, his grip firm. I felt content, safe, and yes, I felt worshipped and adored. I closed my eyes, almost crying that he had reduced me to this. That he could say the things he was saying.

"Daddy's gentle." he said, starting to crush me.

The way he was holding me, it made me feel like I had no choice. He was stronger, bigger than me. I cried out, louder as the resistance eased away, replaced by a dull but building pain. I could feel my cock soften, the alarm I had a few seconds ago making the fear well up inside me once again. It was not like the last time when I was drunk and it just seemed to happen, where he slowly guided me. This time I was aching for it, silently begging. The uncomfortable feeling simply growing in tandem with that beautiful ache and the way he held me.

"Don't be scared, Baby. I won't hurt you. If you listen to me, if you let me work you, Daddy won't hurt you. Daddy just wants to show you what you can do. What you can take."

I felt it, slowly, but measured, easing me open. I groaned a feeble whine as I felt it, gasping for breath, wriggling slightly in his unwavering grip. My ass stretching around his exploratory finger, it felt like it wouldn't go in, but it popped in suddenly. I moaned loudly, reassured that the pain that built up subsided into a mixture of pleasure and pain. I breathed out long and slow, with a mixture of excitement and relief, almost panting. The uncomfortable feeling receded and the stretching feeling was most predominately on my mind.

It can numb some areas.

God he was so right about that. It felt more intense this time, more profound. Although my cock was softening, it nonetheless felt unbelievably sexual. And I thought about that first night, as he'd toyed with my ass, as I had sucked him, as I had stroked myself. I tried to be brave as he held his finger in there, as I shifted my hips, my hands in fists against the tiles, my knuckles knotted, the skin blanching on them rapidly, turning into white peaks. I tried to adjust, and make it more comfortable as the pain slowly receded into the background. I tried to breathe normally, fully aware that I was breathing in short small gasps, with Mike's finger still inside me, and I slowly grew accustomed to the invasion.

I felt his grip loosen against my chest, and slowly slide down to my hip. I tried to bring my breathing under control, I tried desperately, but with a finger up your ass, it's not normal. He held it there, kissing my neck as I groaned, trying to relax. Then he shifted subtly, it moved gently inside me, making me whimper.

"That's right," he said. "Shh, you let me help you relax. Let me show you what you can take."

I felt him carefully ease his finger so slightly back and forth, wiggling it somewhat, as I groaned, feeling helpless and weak. Then he motioned it, trembling it inside me, almost vibrating it like he had done that first night. I closed my eyes as he did it, and moaned as the soft grunts began to rise inside me as he pushed his finger in a little deeper.

He grasped my bottom, firmly gripping it, massaging my ass as he kissed my neck, the finger rocking inside me gently. Softly and gently he continued, to ease it back and forth a little more each time, slowly pushing in more. I could feel my body telling me to stop, but what I was feeling? God no, my ass didn't want him to stop. My throat was dry, inhaling short sharp breaths.

"I don't want to hurt you. You'll tell me if I do, won't you?"

I nodded, aware of my moaning. I was sounding unmanly, but I couldn't help it. I could feel my legs like jelly sinking down a little, my knees softly pressing on to the rim of the bath. His finger coaxing back and forth more quickly now, the lube making it easier, slippery and smooth.

I felt my cock throb at the deeper pushing, as I brought my head up from resting on his neck. Even though I wasn't fully hard any more, it still felt all consuming. I felt his second finger ease up against me, tentatively pressing and testing me. I shook my head. I was only just getting used to the first, I didn't think I could take the second at that moment. I wasn't drunk, wasn't pushing my ass in the air, wasn't focusing on something else, like last time. It wasn't being made easier for both of us, and somehow that added to the moment. To the way it simply felt. Firm but gentle.

"That's right. You've got a sexy bottoms' ass, baby," Mike groaned softly in my ear. "Just enjoy it. Do you want me to make you enjoy it?"

I felt the second start to persuade my bottom to open wider. To accept him. Shaking and moaning, with terrifying whimpers, I tried to stop at the way I must have sounded to him. I felt ashamed at the noises I was making. But I also felt my unwillingness for him to stop what he was doing. I could feel how excited I was, even though I was only semi hard, because I could feel myself almost nearing an orgasm. I shook my head stunned at the sensation.

How could I not be hard and feel like I was close to coming?

"Shhh, I got you," Mike whispered softly, but firmly as his finger eased in and out of me, the second finger bumping harder and harder, up against me, as he slowly increased the pace. "I hear you. Don't be afraid baby... God, your ass is hot for it!"

I felt him semi hard against my thigh, it making me feel desired and wanted even more. And that's when I surrendered. That's when I knew the fear would never win.

I had no choice. My fists on the tiles almost in spasm, I pressed my head against the wall, my red hot face up against the cold tiles, as my grunts and whimpers got more intense, not a protest passing my lips, silently telling him not to stop, silently begging. Mikes second finger was now pushing in, as I dropped my shoulders slightly, leaning against the wall, pushing my ass out at him, repeatedly, wanting, no needing more.

I closed my eyes tightly, as the second digit slickly slid in a little more forcefully, whining and panting at the feeling, whimpering loudly as I felt him make my ass take it. He slowed the pace for a few soft probes, making sure I was okay, but again increased the pace, when my whimpers faded to desperate grunts and long sighs.

I felt the warmth of the shower, cascading down me, washing any sense of awareness from me. His fingers began to caress firmly, deep inside me, rolling around as I started to shake. I could hear my voice, whimpering louder and louder, effeminately, as Mike slowly but surely increased the pace.

Occasionally he would pause. Holding his two fingers terribly deep inside me. I felt him click his fingers, just like he had done that first night, sending the oddest but intense shock waves through me, quickly, before drawing back and resuming the pace. Intermittently, he would repeat this, his fingers starting to fuck me, more and more firmly each time. I knew he would click his fingers inside me, every time he paused. His hand moved to my cock and began lightly stroking me, slick with lube. Mikes fingers rolled around and around inside me, it getting more and more intense every time he did it, repeating it more frequently. Then as he rolled it around, so deep inside me, pressing inside me as I cried, startled as I felt the definite throbs rising within my body.

I'm coming... Wait, I'm coming?

I looked down at my cock with disbelief, as his hand slipped away. I could feel it. It was starting. Looking down, I saw my cock quickly swaying, semi hard as his fingers increased their pace again, hearing my terrified cries. It wasn't just nice. Mike was making me come. His fingers. His voice. Everything.

I thought something inside me was broken. I thought this is what you get for letting a man touch you like this, because you see, there was something missing. In amongst all the feelings, and amongst the sheer terror when I suddenly realised I was coming, I was coming but not ejaculating. It literally took about a second for me to realise it. But when it does happen your stunned. Shocked. Time stops.

The throbs from my cock were there. The orgasmic feeling was unmistakable. But the feeling? The way you ejaculate, it lifts up from the base of your cock. The feeling of it travelling along your cock. The head swelling, the knowing it's being released is also part of a man's orgasmic equation. There's an important element in it. It's called relief.

Everything was there. Everything and more. It was intense. It was overwhelming. It was just more, way more. It was everything.

Except for the relief.

"Shhh... It's okay baby, see what your bottom needs? Let me show you." Again he clicked his fingers inside me and fucked me faster.

I howled and cried, suddenly now fully aware of what was happening. My fists scrambling against the tiled wall, my whimpers and cries echoing around the room. I pushed my ass out desperately, repeatedly, looking down between my legs, watching my cock jerk, rise and fall as his fingers firmly fucked me, my semi hard cock swaying. I could hear his voice, trying to guide me. Trying to tell me it was okay. Trying to put me at ease.

"That's it. God, your sexy. Let that slut out for Daddy," he said roughly, his voice shaking from his activity and what he was doing to me.

I didn't feel shame then. I should have been, I should have been horrified at myself and the words he used. Daddy. I should have been disgusted with the noises I made, because they only encouraged him. But the truth is, it never even entered my mind. It simply never occurred to me, because I felt adored. I felt, immobilized. Frozen, but safe. Horrified but content. I couldn't move, because I loved how it felt. I loved how I felt and I didn't dare move, because I was afraid it was just rocking inside me just right. I didn't want the spell to be broken, I didn't want this feeling to end.

I sank down, my legs failing me, it all too much. He followed me down, kneeling in the bath with me, the water beating down on me harder, his fingers so deep inside me. Rolling as I cried and whined, my mouth ajar gasping in disbelief, his motions slowing as the throbs from my cock eased. I looked at my cock, it engorged and fully hard, jerking occasionally, shaking my head, still trying to accept what had just happened.

I had come from just his fingers.

"Steve..?" He kissed my neck gently. "You are one sexy young man." His voice was a whisper at his next words. "God, you make me so hard."

I felt him shifting a little behind me, his hand briefly leaving my hip, to hug me, his fingers still firmly in my ass. Slowly but surely, my breathing returned to normal. I looked at my cock, fascinated that I was still hard and felt an overwhelming urge to almost start stroking myself again.

"Hold out your hand. I have a present for you," Mike said firmly, interrupting my train of thought.

I tried to look over my shoulder, slightly scared that he may have been holding his cock. Was going to put it in me? Was he going to take out his fingers and replace them with his cock? I looked round turning my head over one shoulder and the next, glancing nervously left and right.

You see, the truth is it was the early nineties. Safety had been promoted for years by the time I went to gay clubs. There were condoms at the bar, safe sex messages everywhere. It was far more blunt and up front in gay clubs. There was no dressing it up, none of the dancing around it. They let you know about it, they told you to be safe. Looking around, over my shoulder, trying to see better, the water in my eyes, I shifted anxiously.

Please. It's got to be safe.

"Your hand. Just hold it out. Trust me..."

I could see his cock, feel it against my bum cheek. He was hard, but he wasn't holding it. Wasn't readying himself to fuck me as far as I could tell. I lifted my shaking hand up, my palm open, his fingers holding still, inside me.

"Good..."

His lifted his hand and placed a plug into it. An anal plug. I stared at it, knowing full well what it was. I may not have been terribly experienced with the opposite sex, but I was no fool. I sat there, staring at it.

This... This, is meant to fit in my ass?

It was bigger that Mike's fingers, the base like a wine glass, widening to an impossibly frightening width, and then rising up to a soft, smoothly rounded off tip.

"I am going to put this in you, slowly and gently," he said firmly. "But first, we'll let you dry yourself off and see what you want to tell me. I know you can't beg Steve. But you could last week..."

I looked around anxiously, making sure he wasn't going to put his cock in me as my ragged breathing slowly regulated itself. I knelt there, my ass sticking out, from the position I was in, bemused as to how this would fit, thinking it was too big. I watched as he lifted it from my hand, and placed it on a shelf out of my view.

"Are you okay with that?" he said, almost whispering.

I shook my head initially, because of the fear, but slowly nodded. I mean I wanted it. I did. I wasn't in a panic, but I was scared.

I felt his slick fingers slowly retreat from my ass, as I groaned. When they did ease out fully I felt strange. I shook my head, trying to understand what I felt.

I felt empty.

He shifted slightly, directing the shower on to my back, the spray warm, as it ran down, his hand softly once again caressing my ass as he gestured for me to get up. I did as he wordlessly commanded.

"Please," I said slightly alarmed. "Please don't put it in my ass." The thing? The thing inside me could do anything when it was fed. Softly guided. Adored. Flattered

"Shhh," he whispered softly, understanding what I was saying. "Please, what...?" Mike whispered.

Oh god.

I understood now. I understood something suddenly. Understood it was a role. A role to make me feel at ease. He was here to guide me. He was here to hold my hand so I felt safe and respected. Adored.