The Floating Threesome Pt. 09

How is it that some guys get lucky with women all the time? For Burt Olsen, luck has nothing to do with it. In The Floating Threesome he figured out a perfect way to persuade lots of women to have sex. The story unfolds in 11 short chapters. Burt makes his final choice in Chapter 9.

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The boat was almost ready. A sign painter came to the shop and put our sponsors' logos on the hulls. Jack complained that it ruined the appearance of his beautiful creation. "You are looking at this the wrong way," I said. "Think of all the race cars you've seen. Those cars are blanketed with logos. When people see that, what goes through their mind is 'Zoom Zoom Zoom!' That's what you want them to think."

"You make a good point," Jack said. "Since I don't have any choice, I'll try to look at it like that."

Taylor came into the office a bit later. She had made a great deal of progress on our social media promotions, and she was anxious to announce a departure date for the cruise. "When are we leaving, Burt?" she asked.

I took a deep breath and told her what happened, trying to be as honest and direct as possible. "Taylor, something completely unexpected has happened. I'm afraid I'm going to make this cruise with someone else. I fully intended to go with you, but our new sponsors made their contributions on the condition that I go with a woman who is a celebrity."

I told her about Maddy and her career as an Olympic athlete, including the fact that Maddy was the one who got all those corporate sponsorships in the first place. "I still want you to work on our promotions," I said. "And I'll make sure you are the model we use in our print ads. With all these donations, we'll be able to buy full-page ads in all the boating magazines. I'm sorry, Taylor. I know this has got to be a big disappointment. It happened in a way that was a complete surprise to me."

Taylor sat there silently. She was stunned. For months, I'd given her every reason to believe that this would be her first modeling opportunity. Her eyes began to well up with tears, but she did not start to cry.

"Does Maddy want to be a model?" Taylor asked.

"Yes. She's trying to find new things to do since she decided to stop competing in gymnastics. She's done modeling for the Olympics, and she wants to do more on her own. I think she wants to work getting sponsorships for other people. But she's got something that is very valuable. She's famous. That gold medal opens lots of doors. I'm sure you understand that having her appear in our online promotions will attract a lot of attention."

"Yes. Yes, it will," Taylor said. "Is she cute, at least? The plan was to have a crew of two hot people with a lot of sex appeal. What does she look like?"

I got out my phone and showed her a photo of Maddy adjusting the rigging as we sailed my boat. "She'll do," Taylor said. "She's got a nice girl-next-door vibe. If the girl-next-door is an elite athlete. She has very nice muscles. She'll photograph well."

"You have proven your value to me, Taylor," I said. "I promise I will keep looking for ways to include you in what we're doing. But you won't be the one to go on this cruise."

Taylor got an odd look on her face. I wondered if she was about to jump up and beat the crap out of me. She shook her head, looked me in the eye, and began telling me one of the most mind-blowing things I've ever heard.

"Burt, you've got this wrong. You've got to take me. It's settled. I've got to go on this cruise."

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I called Maddy, and she invited me to drive to her house and introduce her to Taylor. I didn't say much about what we needed to discuss, but she could tell it was important. "Wow. You're very pretty," Maddy said when she was introduced. "I think you're the prettiest girl I've met since I moved to Miami."

That was the right thing to say. Taylor never gets tired of hearing how gorgeous she is. "That is very gracious, Maddy," Taylor said. "You're pretty cute yourself."

She took us outside to the patio next to her pool and gave us each a cold bottle of water. "I'm dying to know what this is about," Maddy said.

"Let's start by saying that Taylor has been involved in our project for a long time. Months. She's very good with social media, and she's the reason we've gotten so much attention already. She's a wonderful entrepreneur."

"Not just a pretty face," Taylor said.

"Maddy, before I met you, I was pretty sure that Taylor would be going on the cruise with me," I said. "This morning I told her that you're going instead."

"Oh dear," Maddy said. "I had no idea I was competing with anyone. I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry," Taylor said. "I always knew that Burt had to consider a lot of different women. When you advertise a modeling job, there's always a big response. It's part of the business."

"Still, I had no idea I was doing something that would end up disappointing anybody. You must have been very unhappy to get this news."

"That's the thing, Maddy. Nobody needs to be disappointed. I should go on the cruise with you and Burt. It's the best thing for everybody."

"Uh... I don't follow," Maddy said.

"It's simple. I'm sure you've heard Burt talk about the importance of sex in boat advertisements. I'm sure you've heard him say that a lot of people get boats because they think it will help them score with girls."

"I may have heard that one or two million times," Maddy said.

"It's absolutely true. I've looked at a lot of ads and promotions for sailboats, and they almost always include images of sexy men and women. It was always crucial that this thing look like a sex cruise, with two hot people in one hot boat taking a tour of the sexiest places on earth.

"Adding a second girl to the equation makes the whole thing much more effective. Think about it. If our photos include pictures of one sexy man with two sexy girls, it will give the impression that the whole trip is a floating threesome.

"The web will explode with interest. People will check our platforms every day to look for suggestions of romantic shenanigans. And we'll give them plenty to look at. We can upload the most suggestive text and photos imaginable, and I've got a pretty good imagination. Does this make sense to you?"

Maddy was quiet for a second. "You're absolutely right. It makes the cruise a much bigger deal for an online audience. Wow. I like it. We'll be famous. Sort of famous. I'd watch that. Make them wonder who's getting laid, and by who."

"Whom," I said.

"Yes Dad," Maddy said. "It's going to take me a little while to wrap my head around this, but I see exactly what you mean. Gee, this makes the cruise a bigger deal. I'd worried that not enough people would care. I'm not worried anymore. I can tell you that the sponsors are going to love this idea."

We talked about it for a while. I could tell that both women were also wrapping their heads around the idea that I'd obviously been intimate with both of them. I hoped it helped that I explained to Maddy that all this happened before we met. They didn't say anything, but that means nothing. It would be a while before I found out what they really thought.

"The boat is almost ready, and we don't have a lot of time before our cruise," I said. "Jack is arranging to put it in the water Friday. He and Mary are going to take it out Saturday. He's worried that he might have screwed up something he'll need to fix, but I've been through this before, and I'm sure this is just Jack's obsessive-compulsive disorder kicking in. The boat will be fine, and so will Jack. Can you ladies be ready for a cruise Sunday? We need to get familiar with the boat and each other."

"I'm in," Taylor said.

"Me too," said Maddy. "But I have a suggestion. Can we stop calling it 'the boat' all the time? It's got a name. It's the Vanguard. Can we call it Vanguard starting today?"

"Great suggestion," I said. "On Sunday we sail on the Vanguard."

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"That has got to be the sexiest boat I've ever seen," Maddy said.

She was right. The Vanguard looked like the biggest collection of sensuous curves since the days of Marilyn Monroe. Oh. My. God. I don't think there was a straight line anywhere except the deck, which was flat because it had to be. The hulls were curved. The roof was curved. The trampoline - that's the netted area in front of the cabin - was a trapezoid.

The mast was straight but didn't look like it because the sail was an advanced new shape that looked like something transported down from the starship Enterprise. The windshield was a piece of curved plexiglass. When you looked at the Vanguard, what you thought was 'Zoom Zoom Zoom.' That's what I thought, anyway.

"What is all this stuff?" Taylor said. "I've never seen anything like this cockpit."

It was true. Vanguard was equipped with every piece of high-tech equipment available. Jack hadn't planned to outfit his boat with such expensive stuff, but then Maddy got the biggest manufacturers in the business to donate cash and equipment. We had to use it all, of course. That was part of the sponsorship deals. I had literally never seen so much amazing stuff in a boat like the Vanguard. It was equipped like a billionaire's yacht.

"It's going to take some time to learn how to use everything," Maddy said. "We're going to have to spend a lot of hours getting used to it."

"Then let's get to it," I said.

Maddy cast us off, jumped on the hull, then scrambled up to the deck. I turned on the engine for the first time. It was almost silent. Jack had come up with an elegant design that featured an electric jet boat motor in the back of each hull. A dial on the control panel said that the solar panels had fully charged the lithium batteries that powered it all. I am not exaggerating when I say I have never seen a boat move more smoothly than Vanguard. There was no wash from propellers because there were no propellers. The engines discharged jets of water through outlets under the water line. Everything was concealed. Wow. Wow wow wow.

"My Dad has a very nice boat, and it makes a lot more noise than this," Maddy said. "It's got a big diesel engine that is noisy and smelly. I like this better."

"We'll talk about it on our media platforms," Taylor said.

"Great idea," I said. "In the meantime, I am in love. This is like driving a Tesla on the ocean."

Maddy deployed the sails. Vanguard had the standard configuration that featured a large sail - called the mainsail - and a smaller triangular sail in front - called the foresail. There are other ways to do it, but Jack wanted to make a vessel that was easy to operate. Rather than come up with some fancy and complicated arrangement, he used some equations to calculate the optimum size and shape for two easily controlled sails. I was anxious to see how it worked. Jack had some big smiles on his face when he and Mary got back to the shop Saturday, but they refused to say anything. "I'd rather you just see for yourself," he said.

It took about a nanosecond to discover that Vanguard was blazingfast. "How is this possible!?" Maddy said. "This thing wants to fly! I've been on a bazillion different sailboats, and I never saw anything like this. How did Jack make it so fast?"

"He did several things," I said. "The main thing is he made the hulls conform to a shape that is unusually slippery. It's not easy to figure out what shape is best. Jack knows math, OK? It's even harder to turn the concept into fiberglass. But that's what makes Jack such a genius. He can do things ordinary people can't do.

"He made Vanguard very light. You'll notice all kinds of things made of light materials. The bed is an air mattress. And he put the heavy stuff inside the hulls to give Vanguard a low center of gravity. The lithium batteries. The water tank. The engines. All these things are down below the waterline. And I know he made a special effort to minimize drag. For example, most boats have propellers, and propellers cause drag. Vanguard is a jet boat. No propellers. It all adds up to zoom zoom zoom."

"No shit!" Maddy said, turning to take advantage of the direction of the wind. "I love how it feels."

"That sounds like a good quote for our social media platform," Taylor said, taking out her cellphone and making notes.

"What? That people will love this?" I asked.

"No," Taylor said. "I liked how you said 'It all adds up to zoom zoom zoom.' I was pretty bored when you were talking about the shape of the hulls. 'Zoom zoom zoom' says the same thing, but better."

"Great," I said. "I'll try to be less boring in the future."

We spent the next few hours trying out the fancy equipment we'd all need to operate on the cruise. I knew how almost everything worked, although I'd never used such advanced and expensive stuff. Taylor and Maddy learned most of it quickly, and Maddy had the best grasp of how to optimize it all to go as fast as possible. It was obvious that she'd spend more time at the wheel than Taylor or me. It was also obvious that the equipment had features I knew nothing about. In the weeks before the cruise, I'd need to spend some time studying the manuals.

We finally got to a place where we all knew enough to sail the Vanguard. I suggested we all relax with a cocktail before turning around and heading back to the marina. I knew Maddy and Taylor both enjoyed vodka martinis, so the ice chest contained all the ingredients. I had a hidden agenda. I wanted the women to be relaxed when I broached a delicate subject. We were half way through our drinks before I began.

"I feel awkward about something, and I want to talk about it so there are no misunderstandings," I said. "Taylor, Maddy, I'm sure you've figured out that I've been intimate with both of you. Now that the three of us are going on a long trip together, I think you are entitled to an explanation."

"Maddy, Taylor and I spent a lot of time together before I met you. I had decided that she was a very good choice for my crew. She picked up the basics of sailing very quickly, and when she got involved in creating our online promotional campaign, I learned what you are about to learn. Taylor is more than a pretty face. From the beginning, I wanted a beautiful woman who could help people imagine themselves finding romantic adventures by purchasing a sailboat. Well, look at her. She's perfect for that.

"Taylor, I gave you every reason to believe my decision was final. You must be wondering why I even agreed to interview Maddy. You should know that I had stopped interviewing applicants, but when Maddy got in touch with me I reconsidered.

"When I saw the photo of Maddy wearing an Olympic medal, it got my attention. When I thought about it, I doubted that Maddy would even want to make the cruise. I figured I'd take her sailing, tell her about the cruise, and she'd decide it wasn't the best use of her time. I'm not an Olympic fanboy or anything, but I thought it would be fun to get to know her. She's a remarkable woman.

"And she has shown that's true. What she's done finding sponsors is remarkable. Hell, it's miraculous. And she's a better sailor than either one of us. We all want this cruise to demonstrate the Vanguard goes as fast as a high-tech racing catamaran that costs a lot more money. I saw right away that she could make that happen.

"But none of this changes the fact that I feel embarrassed bringing together two women after being intimate with both of them. I'm sorry I put you in this situation. I've felt very lucky that both of you felt I was welcome in your beds. To be blunt, I think you are both out of my league."

There was a long pause. Then Taylor smiled. "So. We're out of your league. Burt, that was the right thing to say. If you were looking for a way to put me in a good mood, you found it. I don't think I'm out of your league, Burt, but it's a very nice thing to say.

"Maddy, I think Burt deserves credit for something. He managed not to say that I seduced him, and not the other way around. I decided pretty quickly that I liked Burt enough to sleep with him. He didn't initiate anything," Taylor said.

"Actually, it's the same with me," Maddy said. "I liked Burt immediately. After we went sailing, he drove me home and I invited him inside. I did that because I hoped I could get him to kiss me. And by kiss me, I mean I hoped he'd fuck my brains out. I initiated it. Burt, I think you're being too hard on yourself. I don't know how Taylor feels, but I didn't think we were in an exclusive relationship. I was hoping we were moving in that direction, but we've only known each other for a few weeks. I didn't think I had any reason to expect you weren't seeing other women."

"I should confess that I've been with other men since we became intimate," Taylor said. "I never thought we were exclusive. The only thing that's awkward is that Maddy and I know about each other now. If we'd never met, there'd be nothing wrong with what you did. There's no reason any of this should come between us."

Something about what Taylor said was... odd. She's a very smart woman. By now she had to know that I'd "interviewed" a lot of would-be models and that I led them all to believe they'd need to sleep with me if they wanted to go on the cruise. I certainly made that clear to Taylor. But she wasn't telling Maddy any of this. She seemed to be trying to make Maddy think my behavior seemed better than it was.

And then things got interesting. At the time, I thought it was something that unfolded naturally and spontaneously. But in retrospect, I'm almost sure that Taylor manipulated the situation to make it all happen.

"I think we need a refill, Burt," Taylor said, draining her glass. I mixed up more martinis and poured us all a second.

"I'm at a disadvantage here," Maddy said. "Both of you guys know all about me, but I don't know anything about you, Taylor. I know you seem like a fascinating person. I know you're good with social media. And I know you're beautiful. But I don't know anything else."

"Taylor is a fascinating person," I said. "I had good reasons for deciding she'd be good for the cruise."

"Well, let's not go overboard," Taylor said. "See what I did there? Overboard? We're on a boat?"

"Very droll," I said.

"Can I ask about you, Taylor?," Maddy said. "What do you do for a living?"

Uh oh. I wondered how Taylor would answer. She didn't like telling people she'd just met that she works as an exotic dancer. Some folks look down on people like Taylor. I was pretty sure Maddy wouldn't be judgemental, but you can't be certain with things like that.

"I guess you could call me an erotic entertainer. I sell erotic content online, especially on OnlyFans. I recently became a cam girl. But most of my income is from exotic dancing."

"Really? I've always been fascinated by that!" Maddy said. "A group of my girlfriends back home used to take me to a club with nude dancing. I loved it."

"I'll bet you loved it most after having a cocktail or three," Taylor said, smiling.

"Well, yeah. That was our favorite place to drink. I had a crush on one of the dancers there. I have no idea what her real name is, but she called herself Venus. My friends figured out that I liked her, and for my birthday they bought me a lapdance."

"How'd you like that?" Taylor said.

"It was... wow. I was pretty drunk, but it was great," Maddy said. "I went home and thought about it alot."

"And by 'thought about it,' I imagine that you mean you went home and drained the batteries of your vibrator, right?" Taylor asked, grinning broadly.

Maddy blushed. It was adorable. "Yeah. Pretty much," she said.