The Garden

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After that you were completely spent so that there was no denying the way you were shaking was from cold and not from need. The shivering racked your whole body. There would be plenty of time for more fun once we were back in the house. You looked confused as I removed the gag and began untying your arms but refrained from asking a question without permission. That made good sense since I had told you that I would be leaving you out here if you agreed to my deal. I might have done just that if you hadn't felt dangerously cold.

"Silly thing, did you really think I was going to leave you out here to freeze? I have to take good care of my toys, no fun to play with if you're damaged. I'll find another way to take it from your hide once we warm you up a little." I finished untying your arms, your legs and then the difficult part, sliding you off of that thing buried inside of you. Once the chain was re-attached to your collar I pulled up on it and helped you up slowly and carefully using the metal pole as support. I saw you wince as the shaft slid out of you slowly, feeling each bump gradually increase and diminish until you were free and standing unsteadily on your own two legs, letting the blood flow back into your limbs, Quickly, I led you back into the house and wrapped a big towel around you while I turned on the gas fireplace. Once you were fairly dry I brought you over to comfy overstuffed leather chair, not for you of course but the fluffy dog bed on the floor wasn't too bad.

"Go lie down pet." I could feel the internal sigh as you got down on all fours again and crawled into the soft bed on the floor. With a click your chain was locked to the chair and I left you there naked to warm up by the fire while I went upstairs to change out of wet clothes. It only took a moment to peel off the wet dress. I put on something similar but left off the bra and panties, I wasn't going to be needing those. The rain was still pounding down on the roof as I descended the stairs and found you I assumed, feeling much better. You looked cozy curled up on the floor but also anxious as you heard me coming, wondering what would be next. Good. This had already been our longest session yet and it would coming to a close soon but not before I tested you in one last area.

I settled into the big armchair and relaxed for a moment.

"Are you warm now pet?"

"Yes ma'am."

"Good, crawl over here to me." You didn't waste any time springing up from the floor and crawl the couple of feet to kneel in front of me.

"My feet and legs could use some kissing after all that work I put in for you." I said wryly.

I might have detected a smirk but it was too hard to tell as you bent down immediately and began planting soft, wet kisses on my feet and licking up my calves, taking your time.

"Higher."

I saw your eyes close in pleasure as I parted my legs to let you lick my inner thighs. You must have been able to smell my arousal at that point and there was plenty of it. I had thought about finishing myself off while watching you and again when I was upstairs. I wasn't sure I wanted to allow you this privilege yet but this was our fifth session and after all, what are sex slaves for? Once you had licked a significant amount of the way up my thigh I put a hand on your forehead to stop you.

"How are you at pleasuring a woman with your mouth pet?"

"Very good ma'am."

I was a bit taken aback. Very good he says? Cocky son of a bitch, isn't he?

"Really? Well here's your chance to prove it. If it's not 'very good' as you say, I'm going to punish you. Now, worship my pussy."

Once again you didn't waste any time getting to work but you didn't rush, planting a kiss on the crease of each thigh and then gently licking and sucking each swollen labia into your mouth, drawing more blood to the area. When you finally buried your tongue into my folds you let out a deep, chesty moan that vibrated all the way inside of me. Clearly this really was worship for you and not just a chore to get on my good side.

I tried the best I could to stay calm, not wanting you to get too cocky, but all I could think as my eyes rolled into the back of my head was: Fuck, this slave knows how to eat a pussy. Maybe I'll keep him. My thoughts continued along that path as you alternated between long luxurious strokes of your tongue to rapid flicks around my clit that had me grabbing handfuls of that dark hair and bucking wildly as I came hard in your mouth.

Pushing your head away from my oversensitive mound, your tongue snaked out of the corner of your mouth, lapping up some of my juices that glistened on your face.

"Good boy."

We had many more sessions after that and eventually you came to live with me during that happy time when we pushed each other's boundaries and fell in love. My greatest regret was driving you away and I know you're never coming back to me but I still think about that day whenever it rains.

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EmirusEmirusover 4 years ago
I did like the story

First things first. I did not dislike your story. I actually did enjoy it apart from the abrupt ending which someone else had already mentioned.

I cannot understand about the font. I’m sure when I read the story initially, and checked your other stories, it was in Quintessential Italic (or something similar) but on looking just now it’s in Ariel. That I can’t explain. I may have got confused about the font with another story I read just before yours (and I can’t remember the title of the story) in which case I apologise.

I write using MSword and as well as changing the size, embolden, italicise and underline you can also change the font. I’ve assumed you can do this with others but perhaps I’m wrong. As a fairly new writer (I’ve only had twelve stories published so far) I’ve found I could usually get the answer to any uncertainty by asking in the Author’s Hangout on the Forum.

As I said I didn’t feel I could critique your writing style because I basically “speed read” the story but that doesn’t mean, as I’ve already said, I didn’t like it.

As regards the paragraphs and the “white space” I’ve read a lot of comments in Author’s Hangout, made by writers with many years of experience and far better than myself, giving exactly the same advice as I’ve given you about paragraph length.

Any advice I give, to any fellow writer, is genuine and meant to help. I spend hours over days/weeks trying to write stories that readers will enjoy and I assume the case is the same with everyone. So I would never make a comment to deliberately dishearten someone.

One thing I would like to applaud you for is you didn’t delete my comment because you didn’t like it but answered it. People commenting in Author’s Hangout (sorry for banging on about it) have said about writers deleting comments they don’t like and I’ve gathered it’s quite common. Although I’ve personally never deleted a comment I can understand if someone deletes a deliberately nasty comment. Nasty comments are like 1-bombs. The person who has done it never goes back to check. Although you will now have gathered I go back because if I don’t I don’t know if the writer has responded to my comment.

A long response but I thought it necessary. Whatever you do about any comments, or 1-bombs, don’t let it deter you from writing more stories.

Adventuress711Adventuress711over 4 years agoAuthor
No offense taken

but just some advice, if you’re reading a story and you dislike it so much that you can’t fully read it or give useful feedback maybe just do us both a favor and don’t comment at all.

Also, I have no idea how it works in other parts of the world but I’m in the US and I have no option to change font as far as I know. All font shows up the same on my web browser.

EmirusEmirusover 4 years ago

This is the first story of yours I’ve read and I’ve just checked your other stories to see what font you’ve used with them and it’s the same. I don’t know whether it’s that I’ve not seen anyone else use that font (except to highlight a character’s thoughts as against their speech) but it would put me off reading another of your stories. I can’t remember ever seeing a mainstream author using it. Perhaps it’s just me personally and because it’s not the usual plain font I find it off putting.

I can’t really give a critique of your writing because I skimmed over a lot of it. I began reading as normal but after the first few hundred words began missing out big chunks. That’s because so many of your paragraphs are so long. Far too long. There needs to be much more “white space.” Writing for Literotica needs a different layout than elsewhere. Many readers, like myself, read the stories on a smartphone and long paragraphs don’t work in that context.

I agree with the previous comment about the ending being very abrupt. It’s as if you ran out of ideas as to how to finish the story.

I’m sorry if my comment seems callous but, if you read comments I’ve made on other stories, you’ll see I’m genuinely trying to be helpful.

Adventuress711Adventuress711over 4 years agoAuthor
Thanks....

For your feedback.

AnonymousAnonymousover 4 years ago
Beautifully crafted and...

Well worth the read. The only criticism is that the ending seemed overly abrupt and final and at odds with the build up.

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