All Comments on 'The Girl, On The Bike'

Interesting story!

5

loved it great take on a partially real story 5*

My God, what a story! Brilliant development, strong main characters. I had to read every word in one go. You should be proud of it.

Superb as usual. I await every story. Thank you!

Neat story of self discovery and relationships. Well done

Thank you for sharing.

Great story, but it needs a follow up down the line sometime. The main characters are too interesting to end in a one off.

Very good story. The story idea was good and the good guys won so a bonus.

Fully developed, 3-dimensional characters that you bring to life within a captivating storyline. Thoroughly enjoyed. The biking scenes are great. Also rode a Cannondale Mtn bike for several years back in the day. Loved it. 5 stars

Certainly among the best stories I have read. This story has everything that makes a story great. Everything. Super-Cagivagurl. Very much look forward to your December event story. Randi.

Loved it! Good work:)

Outstanding tale...about personal growth and discovery. What I love is the attention to detail on the characterization... They are in depth...with such pathos that I properly suspend disbelief and find myself not only involved but identifying with their growth and perspectives. I particularly enjoy the flipping of perspectives on the girlfriend fiancee...who is a totally self absorbed entitled princess with muscles...and through learning from her poor decisions...slowly and believably transforms into a much mature person... I particularly liked the last couple of pages where she prejudicially strikes out against the thugs and malcontents of the kick boxing gym...has her temper tantrum and goes home to daddy..who reams her a new one. She conceptualizes her problem...and changes her self image based upon her issues...making the much more mature decision to listen watch...and participate with her boyfriend in conceptualizing and decisionmaking. In short a tour de force with a matured author upping serve to make a really memorable tale..

5 stars

Well written and touching story. The story show the power of love in friendships and relationships. Thank you for a wel Ritter piece.

One of the very best here on LIT!

This reader on points alone ... gives the story a "5" by a knockout !!

One of your best stories. Nice character development. 5

Wow this is a brilliant story .... 5 stars easily

i enjoyed it!...

EXCELLENT DEVELOPMENT! Good plot and real characters that grew during the story. Lots of great information that came through without feeling like an infodump. i don’t give 5’s freely but this is deserving.

Brilliant. This was a great relationship/personal growth story - for both of them. You write great, believable characters, and there really shine in this one. On a personal note, I boxed as a kid and fought in the early days of MMA (early 2000's) and I want to say that you did a stellar job of capturing the joy & pain of training & competition. 5 stars all the way.

Wow a great read.

Thank you.

Wow! Really good story! The romantic stuff was believable. The criminal stuff was interesting.

Good story, I feel like an eventual part 2 would put a final shine on this story.

Well done Cagi!

I really liked the build up of the story but I felt a little cheated in the ending. An other page could have brought a full closure to a wonderful love story! 5 * and thanks!

Whew, you could smell/taste the testosterone. Most of the middle not my cuppa. That said the love story was sweet even if the reality of dating a champion caused some bruised ego.

superfluous commas!...

Good stuff! 5

Ahhhh…back to the author I’ve grown to admire. Of course, there were more commas sprinkled about than were necessary and other errors too, but they were all minor and not distracting. The story line, the character development, the emotional flow…all were great and consistent with CGs strengths. A powerful story!

WOW! Just WOW! You've written a bunch of really well crafted stories, but WOW. I got nothin' but WOW to say (mark that in your journal...LOL) 5+*

Truly a great story. Loved it! Never bothered with a Lit account, however names OZY.

Bravo! That was really well done. I have some serious doubt that a fighter with only two fights would really get matched with a title contender, and it seems odd that none of the gym fighters were wrestlers or grapplers, especially with Tom teaching others to kick and seemingly having more unplumbed depths, but those are truly minor cavils. Your story structure and character development was absolutely first rate.

Fantastic story. It was a great read. Another great story by you Cagivagurl. 5stars

5 stars are woefully insufficient. Engaging characters and a great story.

This writer is special, like few others on Literotica.

Stories like this are not only great romances, but teach things like social responsibility.

I don't live in NZ, but a story like makes me a want to be a part of the project.

Many many years ago in a satellite of Chicago, then of 60,000 a small group started a similar gym with the emphasis on helping at risk people like those in the story. One of the top politicians in the country came in and worked with the young people. There was never any publicity. To watch that great man helping those young people was so wonderful. He brought hope.

A top politician

eggsexpsionly good will be shortlisted forthe pullet surprise

Absolutely superb. You blew me away, as you have done so often in the past.

Great story with many layers. Way more than about a girl on a bike! 5 stars.

This was a great story. The characters were solid, consistent, and grew into great people by the end. The adversity felt real and plausible. I loved how realistic the police, the promoters and the lovers were presented. Great Job!

Excellent. I enjoyed it immensely.

This was amazing! I live in Auckland, so the intro was quite cool too. Loved the story! This could be a movie.

One of the best you have ever written!!!!

This was great! You don't disappoint when I see your name...

It’s about time you put some of these into a book and published, I’d love to buy it if you do. Yes I love getting them for nothing but really happy to pay as well.

Absolutely fabulous, my thanks

Awesome story, on a pro level, worth publishing.

Brilliant story, a few minor literals but top storytelling. 5*

Sweet and highly entertaining story ;-)

Yep. Another great one. Thanks for sharing.

such a great story; how you described the transformation of ross is top notch. thank you!

Great story, believable characters and a fascinating peek into a world I know nothing of. I especially enjoyed your dialogue. It flowed naturally and effortlessly advanced the plot.

Very, very good!

Outstanding! Thank you for sharing.

G

This was an exceptional story. Both similar to your other stories but also way different. You are an amazingly good teller of tales. Thank you for sharing with us.

Terrific story. Definitely one of the best on Literotica, and could hold its head up in any company. You always write beautifully but the range of characters here and the developments of situation and character, just wonderful. All your stories are great, and I think get better and better.

U never disappoint. At first I thought it was going to be bit long so I jumped around then went back and read every page. It was was worth the read!!!

THANK U

Another exceptional storey from one of the best writers on this site. I have loved all your stories. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

sorry, about 5 pages too long. smuggling steroids, Really?

Sounds like real life !

A believable plot, well written with characters that feel real and the story feels like it is in Auckland. Smuggling steroids totally fits the scenario described.

One quibble. Kiwis say "eh" as an equiry, not "aye" (as in "aye-aye sir"). "Eh" is pronounced like the a in "raving".

Love the use of "Chur".

Kiwis speak English faster than most English speakers by flattening the vowels so the words come out faster. Australian script writers writing for an NZ soap opera found they had to write more than for an equivalent soap in Oz.

Really very very good.

I really liked this romance.

A real journey for both of them.

Loved it!

Once again you have written a story that I truly love and enjoy. Your knowledge once again shows thought and research. The characters develop fluidly. Blending cycling and fighting was well crafted. Thank you for a story that has meaning and insight. K

Randall's alternate personality writes interesting stories when he wants to.

Great story.

Wow, one of your best stories

THANK YOU! In fact, The story took on a life of its own and my hope is that you would continue it. Please!!!

I continue to be impressed by your ability to create the characters who are so full demintioned

that I feel I know them. Your place them in scenes and locations that I feel I have been there.

You place them in plots that are both romantic and exciting.

It was a fun read,

Thank You

A bit short breathed to the end , a little more slowing down, explaining would have balanced it ….. im definitely not into fighting and just reading repulsed me , but the tale at all was fabulous ….. and what an experience having a bike tour with three beauties but just having a starting and ending with them, the rest is a single tracking ….. smile, broken ego …… all your storiesi have been reading so far, like this one too, are perfect for an second chapter

💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💝✨

Great writing and bringing in less popular sports helped keep it going. I rather enjoyed the story line enough that the romance didn't really matter.

I agree with the other commenter, I didn't even need to care about the romance part. The story was that good. 5 stars.

This is a great story with or without the romance (I still wish there was some more romance but that is my wants)

The not so common sports Kick boxing and cycling really set the pace . The detail of Kick boxing was good for a non-fan to understand I wish the cops were not portrayed the way the were, Simon helped their image.

As an American I did struggled with the New Zealand vernacular but through context I was able to understand most of it (I'll look for a New Zealand to American translation source Just kidding)

It was long if you'd put in more Romance (sex) it would have been a waist space (and making it longer)

Good Job 5 stars

Well done! I have enjoyed a lot of your stories, but this one is my favorite. Great story arc, with very likable characters. The biking and MMA details as well as the Kiwi vernacular give the story great authenticity. 5*

Excellentstory, well written, good flow, thank you.

First class story, full of solid goodness, bravo.

Awesome writing..and NZ content..love it

Great pacing and plot development. I'd love to know more about the growth of the business in the community, but you have to stop somewhere.

Top story, first time reading it. I really enjoyed it.

You can really good stories, this proves it.

Scores an easy 5/5

Enjoyable. Thanks

Excellent work. Do you have any novels that you have published

Excellent.