The Hillbilly Pt. 04

The Hillbilly, Part 4

I've been enjoying getting to know this character and I thought it might be interesting to see how he might behave in a different sort of situation. I should tell you that I have some hillbillies on one side of my family, and they aren't always the most "socially progressive" individuals. Plus, they will gleefully tell jokes that will offend more than a few people. On the other hand, they can be fiercely loyal and have a strong sense of right and wrong. It was that thinking that led me to this story.

Some people may be offended by this story and that is not my intention. The sad truth is that we aren't born with knowledge. We learn as we go, and sometimes we need to unlearn what we thought was right and now realize is not. That's what this story is about.

As before, there is no sex in this story.

>>> >>> >>>

They call me Hillbilly. It's a name I earned when I was in the service. I'm not all that different from the other men here in Western Maryland where I live, and hillbilly isn't a term you use too freely around here or someone is likely to take offense, but it got hung on me as a term of respect and I've kept it ever since. Like most people here, I've got a strong sense of traditional values and a deep streak of live-and-let-live. I don't stick my nose into my neighbor's business unless his business is messing with my business.

That said, times change and sometimes those traditional values run headlong into my neighbor's business and men like me need to figure out what it all means. It's a conundrum. My friend Jase presented me with one of those conundrums and it was a doozy.

Jase and I went to school together and we go all the way back to the fourth grade. That was when his family moved to town. His father moved the family down from someplace in Pennsylvania, I honestly don't remember where, but soon he fit right in. Jase's father was a hunter like my own and when we were old enough our fathers took us out and taught us gun safety. We were drilled on gun safety long before they took us to the quarry for our first shoot and even longer before they took us into the field for our first hunt. In our families, hunting was serious business and we soon learned to loath the weekend hunters who came from the city to spray the woods with buckshot and bullets.

For our first hunt, our fathers took us out to hunt squirrels. Just between us, I've eaten a few and I still don't like them. They took us after squirrels because squirrels are small and fast. After squirrels, we graduated to turkeys. With turkeys you can put some meat on the table and that first time serving up a turkey that I'd shot is an experience I will never forget. Deer came later. Our fathers weren't going to let us take a shot at a deer only to shoot some buck in the ass because we got too excited and couldn't shoot straight. They took us out for deer only after we'd proven that we could hit a squirrel reliably and pick the turkey we wanted. We practiced and when we were ready our fathers took us on our first deer hunt. To tell you the truth, deer hunts can be pretty damn boring. You sit and you wait, and you sit some more, and maybe if you are lucky a big buck will come down the path and into range. More often, they don't. Only after we'd shown our fathers that we could shoot straight, pick our shots, and wait patiently for the right moment did they teach us to hunt pheasant and to this day that's still my favorite hunt. Nothing is as challenging as pheasant and quail. Of course, I won't turn down a good duck hunt when I'm invited.

Yeah, Jase and I go way back.

All the while, we were learning the other lessons of life, and somewhere along the way we started noticing girls. We liked what we saw. We didn't understand them, but we liked them. We both had sisters and cousins, but we quickly decided that they just weren't the same. I had a friend who told me he liked my sister, and I told him he was nuts. Looking back, I wish I'd handled that differently. He turned out to be a standup guy and she married an asswipe that cheated on her, but I've already told you that story.

Now this may surprise you, but the men where we grew up didn't spend a lot of time sitting around and talking about our feelings. Don't get me wrong; we're not animals. We were happy for each other's successes, tried to give support for the failures, and basically agreed that we'd be there for each other when we were needed. That's not just Jase and me. That's our whole group of friends. It's the way we were raised. If you can't be there for a friend when they need you, then you aren't much of a friend.

I got out of the service and went into the local community college. Barbara and I were engaged, but I wasn't going to marry her until we could support ourselves and had what we needed to build an independent life. To cut expenses, we were both living with our parents. I was working part time and going to school while Barbara was working full time so we could save money for a piece of land. On this day, Jase and I were sitting out back nursing a couple of beers. Jase was unusually quiet, and I had my mind on other things, so between us there was a lot of staring off into space as we sipped our beers.

Jase eventually broke the silence. "Jeb?"

Okay, I should have told you. My real name is Jebediah B. Greene and I've been called Jeb since I was in short pants, so you can understand that when the gunnery sergeant hung that name Hillbilly on me, I accepted it with some enthusiasm.

"Jeb?"

He startled me. "Sorry, Jase. My head's someplace else today."

"Not to worry."

I waited for him to finish his thought, but he didn't say anything. I turned to look at him and he was again just staring off across the field.

"Did you have something to say?"

"Nah. That's alright."

I should have realized something was bothering him, but I was busy trying to figure out how to build our savings so Barbara and I could get married sooner.

A few minutes later Jase started in again.

"Jeb?"

This time I answered. "Yeah?"

"I need to tell you something."

"I figured." That's what passes for humor with us.

He smiled a wry smile, took a deep breath, and said, "Jeb, I'm gay."

Jase and I were raised in the same town with the same values and the same expectations, so he expected the worst from me, but I was more confused than concerned.

"You sure?"

He laughed quietly and shook his head. I guess I'd disappointed him with my quick wit and brilliant retort.

"Yeah, I'm sure."

I thought for a moment and said, "Oh... Since when?"

"Since forever."

"But you dated Jennifer Bailey back in high school?"

"Yeah. I probably should apologize to her for that. I disappointed her. I didn't want anybody to know."

I was not processing the central truth of the conversation. "That's okay. She's married now. I think they live in Westminster."

I was still looking at him, more confused than anything. I didn't know what to say next and surprised myself. "You seeing anyone?"

He looked at me with some surprise and said, "Actually, I am."

There was not much more I could do than nod as I tried to process the information. There were a few guys in the service that we joked about being gay, but nobody had actually come out before.

Like I said, my core values were running headlong into none-of-my-business, and I was in uncharted territory.

Later that night I had a talk with Barbara about it.

"Jase came out to me today."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean he told me he's gay."

Barbara just raised her eyebrows and said, "Oh. I thought so."

I was momentarily annoyed. "What do you mean you thought so?"

"I mean I've wondered, but it really wasn't any of my business."

"Why did you wonder?" I was genuinely confused by this point.

"Well, I've never seen him with a woman. He's always traveling alone."

"What do you mean? He used to date Jennifer Bailey back in school!" She had to know that.

"Oh, I never put much faith in that. Jennifer was always complaining that she could never get his motor started."

"You two talked about that sort of thing?"

Barbara just looked at me like I was slow and said, "Honey, all women talk about that sort of thing."

I didn't like where this was going with this. "What do you say about me?"

She just laughed quietly and said, "I tell them your motor is always running and I have no complaints."

I could live with that. "I've never known anyone who was gay. I mean, there were some guys back in the service, but we never really knew."

"What about your cousin David?"

"What about him? He isn't gay."

She patted my arm. "Oh, sweety, you need to pay more attention."

"How do you know he's gay?"

"He told me." She said it so matter of fact.

"What do you mean? When?" I just took a deep breath and let it out. I thought for a minute and all the pieces fell into place. Yeah, David was gay. So now I have a gay cousin and a gay friend. I was feeling downright cosmopolitan.

"What do you think I should do?"

"About what?" She seemed genuinely confused.

"About Jase and David."

She looked at me like a schoolteacher getting ready to reprimand a student. "Is there something about them that you object to?"

"Well... No."

"Is there some reason why you can't still be their friend and cousin?"

"No." It was becoming clearer to me.

"Then I suggest you get over yourself and stop thinking about it."

I was destined to learn many lessons from my wife in the years to come and most were taught like this with a degree of patience and understanding followed by some straight-up truth. Today I was left with a lot to think about, but what I knew most of all was that both Jase and David were good men, and they deserved my respect. I just needed to make peace with this new information.

Barbara was, as usual, several steps ahead of me. "Is Jase seeing anybody?"

"As a matter of fact, he says he is."

"Maybe we should have a cookout and tell him to invite his boyfriend."

Okay, that word was going to take some getting used to.

Barbara and I set a date for the cookout and a few days later I spoke with Jase. His first response was, "Ah, Jeb, I haven't told anyone else. Right now, you and Barbara are the only people who know."

So Barbara pushed the date back a bit and Jase prepared to tell the rest of our friends.

It was a Saturday, everything important happens on a Saturday, and I had called a meeting of the Hillbilly brain trust. There was me and Jase, JP, Danny, Boyd, and Lonnie. I once told Lonnie that I only kept him around to make me feel better about my name, but he just shook his head and said, "Nope. You're still the winner." He was right.

We were sitting in my father's barn with a cooler of beer and talking about nothing in particular. This was Jase's show and he needed to decide if and when to have the conversation. He let them get that first beer under their belts before he started.

"Well, I asked Jeb to call you all here because I have something I need to tell you."

They didn't let him finish.

"You're finally getting that mole taken off the back of your neck?"

"You sold that ugly car of yours."

"You're getting hair plugs!"

Jase just looked at the ground and shook his head. Like I said, it's what we do.

"I lost the mole two months ago. Thank you for noticing. I'll never sell my car and I don't need hair plugs."

After some good-natured ribbing, the group was now settled down to listen.

Jase took another deep breath and exhaled. "I told Jeb a few days ago and I want to tell the rest of you. I'm gay and I don't want to hide it anymore."

The best way to describe the look on their faces is puzzlement. Still, this was Jase's meeting and I needed to let him finish his pitch.

After a moment of silence, the laughter broke out.

"Good one, Jase! You had us going there."

"I'm not kidding."

"Yeah, what?"

"But what about Jennifer Bailey?"

"I was still in the closet."

"Does she know?"

"I think she does."

There were some questions and confusion followed by Boyd saying, "Maybe you just haven't met the right woman."

Jase had the good grace to shake his head and laugh at that, but some of the other guys flashed Boyd the "You're an idiot!" look.

Jase tried to bring the discussion to a point. "Look, I'm sure. I've known all my life. I'm not looking for the right woman. I'm looking for the right man, and before you ask, no, you're not him! None of you are him."

I hate to say it, but there was a slight sigh of relief when he said that. Then Danny said, "I guess my wife will be relieved to hear that." Danny didn't escape getting a load of shit for that, but from then on, the conversation was a great deal more relaxed.

It didn't happen overnight, but it happened. We soon got comfortable with Jace's revelation and made peace with the new reality. He was, after all, still Jace. He just wouldn't be chasing after our wives, and we took a small measure of comfort in that. The next hurtle was the cookout when Jase brought Ben to meet the group. The wives welcomed him immediately and the rest of us made the effort, but we really warmed to him when we learned he is a hunter and had done some serious elk hunts in the west. An elk hunt was a major item on all our bucket lists, so we listened intently as he described the whole experience. By the end of the night Ben was just one of the guys who happened to go home with Jase.

Life went on as usual after the cookout and the brain trust grew by one. We taught Ben how to boil a turkey in oil and he showed us how to better tune our trucks to run on biodiesel. Pretty soon Jase and Ben were no different than any other couple we knew.

I told you we grew up with a strong sense of traditional values and a deep streak of live-and-let-live. Well, homosexuality wasn't exactly one of our traditional values, or it wasn't growing up, but we'd made peace with it, and we damn well understood the concept of a fair fight. So when the call came that Ben and Jase were in the local hospital, we all got there as fast as our trucks would take us. It wasn't a pretty sight. Our friends had been enjoying their beers when some of the local boys decided to beat the gay out of them. It doesn't take much courage when six or more local rednecks decide to take on two fellows who are just minding their own business and we decided to even the odds. We knew the bar and we knew who we were looking for, so it didn't take long. We caught them outside on the way to their trucks and we gave them a little hillbilly education. Ben and Jase told us later that they were leaving the hospital as their assailants were coming in. Nothing was said, but they all understood.

We all spent a night in jail for our troubles and paid a fine. Our attitude was we'd gotten our money's worth and didn't mind paying the bill. Sometime later Ben and Jase admitted that they were not comfortable returning to that bar, and nobody could blame them, but we didn't like the idea of our friends looking over their shoulders, so we took it on ourselves to have a talk with their assailants.

We walked into the bar shortly after quitting time and looked around. They weren't there. The bartender asked if he could help us, and we asked about the fellows we were looking for. He hadn't seen them in a few days, but he reminded us that the night was early. We told him to say hello for us and to tell them that we always finish what we start.

We heard all six left town not long after that never to be seen again.

As for Ben and Jase, their relationship ended like so many couples and they went in search of new partners. They parted amicably and Ben remains a part of our group to this day. Each found what they were looking for and today our group of friends has only grown. Each went on to adopt kids that needed parents and their kids grew up playing with our kids treating each other as cousins by choice rather than blood.

You may think you can't teach an old hillbilly new tricks, but it's not true. We just need a little time and the help of a good spouse to work it out. I remain to this day loyal to my core values, but life brings surprises and with them a better understanding of what those values really are.

>>> >>> >>>

I did say that this story may offend some readers, but that is not my intention. The simple truth is that if you are of a certain age, then you grew up with values that need to be challenged to change.