All Comments on 'The Island'

Very impersonal. Very forgettable.

It was over really quick. No character building or anything you just skipped straight into it.

Short as it was, it was a fine first attempt. It flowed well and felt like a dream you had to get on paper. Keep writing and look for constructive critics.

It is nice to see the natural things in life and not the PC options. Good for you both.

Yes it needed length , more character development , we needed to know how Lilly

felt emotionally . Though you had a good concept, it felt rushed. you didn't even

give the main character a name. I will be looking for more stories. Please continue

writing.

felt rushed and no name for the main character nor descriptions. I would suggest a rewrite where you flesh out the details.

Loved the natural progression of their intimacy.

Thanks for the read.

I suggest that you give this story another go when you are over 18 and a little more worldly; right now, you're too young to be here.

Rabbits aren't on any island naturally. Watch Cast Away and pay attention to what he eats. As for the story, it was rushed and lacked description.

Contrived, formulaic, immature, impersonal, predictable, rushed, underdeveloped

This could be a good story if you build more about their childhood.

Now add more details to the outline, then write a fantastic story.

I love how fast they started fucking. I don’t like it when it takes forever to get to the actual sex. And when the siblings are awkward about it. I love how natural it was. A part 2 with the daughter grown up and getting pregnant by her father would be so good.

not something i could jerk it to

They fucked had a baby then quit fucking for 12 years and finally fucked again and had another baby??? That's the story???

Is no one going to say how this is a Blue Lagoon rip off

In Germany u would never be allowed to marry your sister. What do you think about Germany?

Good story, liked it.

I'd like to critique the story, but there simply isn't a story here for Mr to critique. Calling this a plot summary would almost be an exaggeration.