All Comments on 'The Island Ch. 02'

Fantastic story so far. Think it has more potential than newu tbh lol

Just as good as the first chapter, excellent work.

It's a really enjoyable story so far, and I can't wait to see what happens and if the collective ever actually realise it's the water that's the issue, that they've all been hinting at whenever it's mentioned. Plot...

I have a little issue with the nurse/doctor of the group making them get rid of all the viable alcohol that they found though. Alcohol is a very important resource when trying to maintain a sterile environment and to a medical professional it should be pretty apparent that it's hard to make and would be priceless in the event of an injury that needed disinfecting/cleaning. Although I can make a leap and surmise that the plots need for nothing but the special water and whatever has fed on the water to be consumed would over-rule that need, especially if there is some kind of directed mind control at work.

Another five star chapter! Loved learning more about the island and the characters, and the sex was blisteringly hot. The mind control / sci fi aspect is intriguing. Can’t wait to read more! Thanks for sharing your work.

Good story so far, but please give the women more depth and personality. You’re turning them into mindless interchangeable bimbos and that’s a snooze fest. Personally, I hope you add a bit of bisexuality between Dan and Ray in the upcoming chapters, that would really spice up the story from being another boilerplate harem story.

Also, your erasure of an autistic person’s sexuality is super fucking ableist. Yikes!!

Good story but he’s still married, so as far as I’m concerned, he’s a cheater as well.

Her actions don’t justify his.

As if being stranded on a desert island isn't scary enough, mind-altering substances in the only food available is terrifying. So far it's all been good feels magic coconuts, hope there's no paranoia limes or racism carrots!

Enjoying the story so far, look forward to more. I have a suspicion there's going to be something hinky with the body, since they didn't get around to clearing it out in this chapter.

SHIT!!!! I love it! Now I'm going to have to start reading NewU.

The animalistic fucking has hit my kinks pretty deep. The water has to be affecting Tom & the others. Will the older women start to get younger bodies? The way the women are imprinting is neat as this keeps one massive orgy from happening. After reading so many of my Trans peers discuss how autism is a part of them I am wondering if Tom might transform into a more femme person? Might be projection of me just wanting a character that is lots like me if I was on the Island. I kept imagining Dan having me pushed down taking me from behind as you wrote the sex between him and Hayley.

I like the details. Please keep writing.

looking forward to the next chapter

Great second chapter, moving the story along. I hope you'll start to flesh out the personalities of the characters beyond the protagonist.

The first two chapters are really good. Well written, the mystery is unveiling itself at a good pace, and I'm quite intrigued to find out how their little society develops.

Story is great, Hey Whackdoodle, Is your first name KAREN? Take your BS morality somewhere else, It's fiction for gods sake!

I’m just loving the first two chapters and can’t wait to see the devistation he reeks when he returns home as a hero saving people like he did whilst telling the truth of why he was on the plane in the first place lol please hurry with chapter 3 as I’m desperate to find out what happens. Thanks for the hard work you continue to put in on both your stories I love them both.

Awesome as always

I hope you write a chapter from the perspective of Hayley or Liz or the other women. It’d be fascinating to get their view on the changes they are feeling within themselves. I wonder what kind of personal lives they had before the plane crash and how they are reconciling the grief of leaving their old life behind as they have to establish a new life in this island.

I also wonder what forms of conflict will come up amongst the survivors. I think it would enhance the plot if some members of the group wanted one thing and others wanted something else. A rift in the group and a power struggle with two different camps would create lots of drama and excitement.

Awww. I wanted to keep reading. Really good.

Thank you.

Looking forward to next chapter!

I second the comment from WretchedMonkey - I was going to make that comment myself regarding alcohol being an invaluable resource this early on. Especially vodka, as anything distilled to that level with very few additives it would make a fantastic cleanser. Even if it wasn't for cleansing, a little bit would go a long way towards getting a fire started.

"Instead, she just yanked them down hard; letting my hips and the power of her hands rip the button out of its mooring, and flick off somewhere"

It genuinely irritated me that she did this. They're in a life-or-death survival situation. Things like buttons can be important and are irreplaceable here.

Can't wait to read the next chapter. Thank you for the excellent writing

Please develops the female characters as more than sex toys. You’ve got a lot of potential there with the abilities you’ve attributed to them. And perhaps a partner for Tom.

You would be my particular literotica hero if you can write a chapter without using the word “smirk”. I haven’t seen anyone achieve this yet but hope springs eternal.

I wish we knew more backstory about the women. Have them share about their personal histories, their hopes, their motivations, their grief for the people/families they’ve left behind. All these islanders witnessed hundreds of people die and will likely never see their loved ones again. That’s a huge amount of trauma to process and it gets skimmed over. If we learn more about the women we’ll care more about their journeys; however at this point they are just bland and forgettable. This story has potential to go places, but the author really needs to learn how to better write about human emotions, especially from a female perspective.

Wonderful writing. I look forward to more. In the meantime, I'll be checking out your other stories

A W E S O M E. Steve was a nice touch. Hope to read more about him in the next stories. I hope the 3rd part comes soon.👍

Oh, I like the idea of Dan and Ray doing sexual things together. Please allow the island’s mind control elements to impact their bisexuality.

Great story. please keep going.

I agree with other commenter - please reveal back story of other characters. Flesh out the ladies characters, within the parameters of the story. (Since we don't yet know what is influencing the ladies, any specific suggestions could violate your baseline plot.)

Yes, one or more ladies should attach themselves to Tom.

No, we don't need any slash (gay) stuff. An island with three guys and nine horny women? (okay, only five are horny - so far). Male/male doesn't fit the setup.

Excellent writing and story. Amy seems a good role model for the women but may I suggest you bring the others more into the story. 5⛤👍👍

Thanks for the chapter! I thought chapter 3 was going to be posted yesterday?

I am floored with the mysterious nature of the story published is right. After you have wowed us. Please make this an actual print book! The sexuality is a cherry on top of a well thought out story

Enjoying this tale!

Not interested in Ray/Dan, but Tom does deserve some understanding love. With 9 people, odds are good that at least one person in not cis, might be interesting to play into that.

I agree, we need to know more about the ladies as we go along. Thanks!

FYI, when you break a coconut, it's coconut water you get, not milk. With plentiful coconuts, they shouldn't have any immediate concern for dehydration.

Btw, coconut milk is what you get when you blend the white flesh of a coconut. If the fruit is too mature though, the flesh becomes fibrous, and you'd have to pass it through a sieve after blending to get the milk separated. And if you leave the milk alone for a while, you can skim the coconut cream from its top layer.

Huh, I would have asked if anything other than coconut would have been there - the taste just makes me want to vomit…

So Mysterious Island with sex…is Capt. Nemo going to be the one pulling the strings?

I don't like the typical mind control stories, so I am happy that you aren't writing those.

I thoroughly enjoyed NewU and now this is shaping up to another enjoyable adventure!

Thanks!

I wish your did more characters buildings on the women instead of turning most of them into raving nymphomaniacs or was that your goal? The cause most probably something to do with the island itself. But anyway that’s why I’m downgraded this story to a ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ story. Sorry…

dump all the alchocal ?? strange move, save for disinfectant as medical use .. great story so far