All Comments on 'The Journey'

Accidentally hit the three stars, but it's totally a 5! I hope you make a sequel!

honestly I think you hit the right things all along the story I really enjoyed it and the romance part was my favourite

This is amazingly hot. I definitely hope for more.

Any chance for a prologue jared will get fuck by all of them one by one i mean :)

Great story btw 10/10

Every once and awhile literotica puts out a gem. This is one of them. I found myself loving your approach to futadom. I’m typically a fan of the whole sissification/chastity/butt plug/sph/emasculation themes but you definitely opened my eyes to how hot a softer more wholesome futadom can be. The handsfree no touchy rule set in the hot spring cave scene set me off! I was locked in after that. You write beautiful dominate Futas excellently, and I hope that maybe one day you’ll find yourself able to go deeper into the sissification/emasculation themes while still maintaining that well done wholesomeness you seem to have a trademark on. I have yet to see someone mesh the two types of futadom completely yet. You may be the author. 9.5/10 - wholesome isn’t normally my thing but this made it my thing

Great story, I rated it 5/5, but honestly that was much more for the potential than what was here. The story and plot was great, but the characters could really be more fleshed out, at least personality wise. Zaira and Jaden was pretty good in that sense, but could still benefit from a touch up, but the other 3 orcs in their group could really use some more character.

Other than that, more details and better descriptions overall, but especially in the sex scenes. One prime example of that would be the last climax in the story: ""Do it! Do it now," Mistress Za'ira roared, and all four Futas came with a unified groan, as they blasted their cum into their lover. It took a while, but eventually, they ran dry, and slumped onto the furs, completely satisfied." --- 2 sentences, basically going: "They all came and were satisfied and went to sleep". That's not really a satisfying conclusion IMHO. No mention of cumflation after he got a bump from just Zaira earlier, and now after she had deliberately gotten blue balls plus there being 3 more orcs cumming inside him together and not even a mention? Other than that it's a bit of a cop out to just have them fall asleep 2 seconds after instead of maybe commenting on how he looks now or discussing what to do once Jaden wakes up again or something. Again, though, this was just the climax of just this sex scene, the other ones could really use some beefing up as well both in detail and descriptions and general length.

Great story, could have been legendary with just a few touch ups though which is a shame. I'd recommend reading some DamienDeath20 or ScumDumpster69 stories to get your bases covered, especially in your sex scenes because, again, your general story and plot was already great to begin with.

Looking forward to see your future works :)

The story was great! Yes it did a need a little more detail here and there. But all together, it told a good story!

Lets see what you got next!

With either this story or others, I wish the ending scene had gone on a little longer, i bet he had fun! lol 5 stars

This is a really awesome story, and I enjoyed it a lot. 5/5 rating. But there were so many elements and plot devices that were introduced that I think it ended up being too short to do everything justice. Divine intervention, twin sisters, geopolitics… You created an incredible world, I would have loved to see you make this a 20 page story, instead of 13. Or maybe five different four-page chapters. Just a thought. Please keep writing!

I wish you had given a boy a bigger cock, blessed by Vala, which grows to 15 inches when he desires and in a break from tradition as his reward he gets to fuck all 4 in turn. Overall it was fantastic. And oh perhaps with his magical cock he is able to sire children and impregnate the futa women.

He should have a blowjob and fuck them as well

Great story set in an interesting world. It could really use a part 2.

Besides that good stuff

Lovely, quite cute and romantic.

that was one of the hottest story I read in a long time

An entertaining and erotic fantasy, but it could use more proofreading for grammar and spelling errors. Keep on writing.

Amazing work! I love the fact that you took your time to create a certain lore and explain why Futas exist and what are the tensions on the Continent. I like your style. The erotic parts are really hot after the long build up. I hope you will continue to develop this fantasy world further

What was the surprise Gala hinted at as Jared was leaving the dreamscape?

Very well written, especially compared to most of what is written in this genre. Minor spelling mistakes and grammar errors aside it was a pleasant read, I hope to see more from you soon.

Amazing keep up the good work cant wait for more the best story i've read on lit all year

Great

Theres so many stories untold and Id love to read them from you!

The story development was good, the characters had depth, and the sex was well-written as well. The over-use of commas made some of the sentences harder to parse, and it happened often enough to be distracting. Other than that, excellent story.

As far as the story goes its one of the most interesting I've ever read on this site. Great plot and the sex scenes are amazing. The only complaint I have is that your characters (usually your male ones) don't have much of a personality. You give them lots of good traits but very few flaws which can make them a bit boring to read on outside of sex scene.

Even with that small issue its still and amazing story that I'll definitely recommend to my friends

Well, I am sorry in advance It`s my opinion and perhaps it will upset a lot but I`ve to say it anyway, The build up is great , but in 13 pages only two fuck scene ~come on!!!!!~ the first very short and the other with four Futa at once!!, I didn`t counted blowjob witch was btw repeated but it was a lot indeed, you already made your point in fight scenes and the dangers journey ,so why you almost repeated it every while ,adding only minor details, finally the last and the major sex scene that we all waiting for and put a lot of anticipations for it since all the Futa had promised every time they talked about it . well it was good but it should be great and with four Futa it needed more details. you are a wonderful writer but you waste so much pages and almost forget that it is an erotic story in first place, I mean 13 page with only two fuck scene!!!! to be honest I am disappointed because a lot of stories here only have two or three page and you can find a good build up and one or two detailed fuck scenes .

Would love to read more of futa orcs.

That was a great fun story! Please continue would love to see where this goes

Please write more. So hot!

i myself don't know if i like domination, its kinky but i hate the idea of it, but story wise i like the plot and story but again not 5 stars, also the whole thing of she didn't wanna strip away who he was, it felt like that happened anyway, he started as self sufficient enough and confident but it felt like his entire persality was changed, also im one for spouses being equals so this stuff isn't my thing, in any case well written i just suggest more detail, love the fight scenes btw! I'd like if they were a little longer but they are well written!

Honestly, it was freaking awesome. The slight detail that makes it not perfect is the few english mistakes. It would be a shame if you were a native, but as you aren't, keep it up like that. It'll come naturally. But for now maybe you could ask someone's help for those, so he can show you what are your mistakes for you not to do them anymore. Anyway, I had a really great time reding your story. It had a great balance between the sex parts and the story.

I would truly love a sequel like "what happened to them" even if it's way shorter.