All Comments on 'The Legacy of Number 7 and Number 1'

Kind of strange — which isn't inherently bad, but it really lacked emotion. I don't think that one can feel sympathetic towards either character. That said, if two cartoon characters like this actually exist, certain institutions of 'higher learning' in the Boston area would be high on my search criteria for locating them.

A very dispassionate account of a passionate affair between people who suppress any outward indications of emotion. I have known people like them.

Not a bad tale but different. Not really in a good way but I see potential. Keep it up. You could be great someday.

Not a criticism of the story - just a wish that you could differentiate between Loose (something free and not tied down) to Lose (something that cannot be found or can be lost).

less drivel 1/2 *

the obvious (perhaps a little TOO obvious) similarities to Lilith and Fraiser Crane? You didn't come out with a direct reference, but two Boston Academics who are losers in love yet still find and cling to each other with a geek chic passion that many readers find "stilted". I liked the overt romantic tone of this piece as compared to your other offering "fallen wife", also posted today. Yes, the character development is better here, but the characters themselves are still too stereotype. Or at least a fond remembrance of a once-beloved 80s sitcom, that spurned many flavors of imitation and sequel/spin-off. Retooling "the cheating wife finally gets her worm" plot, is still relatively interesting from his post-divorce view. Still, she emerges as someone who it is plausible for him to fall in love with. So yes, the romance angle works. It may not be everyone's flavor of chowder, but it still flavors your evolution as a writer. Thanks for sharing, and keep at it. Reread your work out loud, as a self-editing exercise. And ask yourself how your words sound, and come across to others, as you have strung them together on this go-around. The needed change towards improvement could be simple, or potentially require a serious re-write. But this helps with the spit and polish process, as well as help you to develop your storytelling voice. Then, in time, this process becomes even easier. Good Luck!

Experiment with the idea of having a character get pissed off and throw something.

I liked all three of your stories.

You seem to have failed to bring across the kind of pain that these kinds of

treatments of spouses male or female often spawn. They were interesting in that all had reactions to circumstances that were thrust upon them but were related as if humiliation and torment were already passed.

I think that some character development working through some of these painful situations would be good for you write.

I for one would enjoy reading more of your work.

Thanks

Any similarity i am sure would be accidental, else litigious leanings would prevail. Besides which, who would want to imitate a television show?

Homophones and VRS. Moandick, i concur heartily with the Loose/Lose phenomenon. Personally I believe its Voice Recognition Software at fault, in that the slight difference in the sounds of the two words does not trip the " lose" search parameter, so VRS defaults to " loose"

Either that or writers in here, none of them can spell.

vide Waste/Waist There/Their/They're You're/Your, or that most invasive (and illogical) Discreet / Discrete .( tactful / in separate parts opposite to concrete)

Tripping over roots on the path of reading,

Kilroy.

Math and physics academicians' minds don't work like ours, as is obvious in this story. I like it.

It was good. Keep on writing. Some people mentioned the spelling, but, hey, my spell checker highlights Maths written as Math.

Another note: loose rhymes with goose and noose. You mean lose when you write loose. Same as dinning and dining. Distracting. You demonstrate here that same gift for developing character by implication without having to do it the hard way. Subtle. I do agree you should stretch and get emotional - any emotion, just do it.

A good read and good attempt at a tricky subject. It was different from the norm in this section. For one it had a happy ending.

There was a void of emotion in the story and the relationship seemed to cool IMO.

Please add some more warmth to the relationship.

The ending I feel was a little abrupt with both mentioning a possibility of moving on to another lover.

This is an easier read than your first two. But, it doesn't have quite the sharp conflict and emotional impact of those first ones.

You are, or have, the makings of a fine writer and your style is different from others, which distinguishes you well.

Keep up the good work. Let's hope for some real conflict in an upcoming one.

Best regards,

-Pultoy

I like your style. This is a very believable story. No one was demonised. Even the hubby seemed reasonable. It is easy to write a story where one party is evil, but to write about regular people (who maybe self-centered) and come up with a good yarn takes skill. I would have liked to know what El's plans about her own future were once she found out about her husband's infidelity, but it wasn't necessary. I did like knowing Jenkins thought processes. Maybe mathematicians are analytical by nature and not too emotional. The personalities may have been spot on. I didn't need too much history but I would have liked to know why Jenkins first marriage failed and how that might have colored him.

Thanks for not going into the politics that were alluded to. Great story.

The problem is to read it as the author created it. Being an academic myself I do not find their thinking so strange and I loved the peacock story!

I got a kick out of the story. Characters are really vivid, with the peculiar oddities of the highly intelligent. Looking forward to more.

A very enjoyable story. Not perfect but then the biggest flaw for me was that she most likely would have custody of the kids and the story did not mention that her and her children would be a package deal. Other than that it remains a very enjoyable story to read.

But you're still an asshole. One big star. You should have allowed voting on "Gerald's bit decision."

But is also sounds like the commitment is rather shaky. Waiting for Number 2 or Number 8 is a hell of a way to conduct a partnership.

Too deep for me. I didn't understand a thing

But a little too (ok, a lot) quirky for me.

3-stars

I like assholes that leave stupid revues under anonymous. They want to insult but don't have the balls to let you know who they are. I understand the whole premises.

Funny, but l liked it. Ships in the night that finally collide.

4/5

Neither character was particularly interesting. Given their backgrounds, they should have been.

Little to fuzzy for me.