The Lonely Girl

"You can't protect me Kyle, not from this."

She was right. The realization felt like a momentary stab to his heart. Kyle resolved to do what he could. He would do what he always did, show her that she was loved and safe at home. It was all he could do. Charlie fell asleep and Kyle went back to his room to do the same.

*****

Charlie was suspended from school on Friday due to her part in the "fight". Kyle offered to stay home with her and his parents agreed it was a good idea. She stayed in her shell throughout Friday and part of Saturday. By Saturday afternoon Kyle convinced Charlie to watch a movie they both loved and she even laughed a little. Sunday, after a lot of cajoling, Kyle got her to agree to go for a hike with him. They hadn't hiked with each other in a while. With Kyle's social, academic, and sports schedules filling up most of his time...but this weekend he cleared everything to spend with Charlie.

When they first got to the park, Charlie seemed nervous. Like she expected the pack of girls to be hiding behind every tree. After about fifteen minutes of hiking though, he could almost see her visibly relax. After about another half-hour and she was almost back to her old self. Bubbly, chatty and endlessly endearing.

They ate dinner that evening as a family and Kyle could see the dark cloud start to descend on her. She had to go back to school tomorrow and the dread was starting to eat at her.

Kyle did what he could. He spent the rest of the evening with her. Trying to engage her in conversations, even trying to get her to do some homework. Anything to get her mind off tomorrow. Eventually she went to sleep and after a while, so did Kyle. He made sure to visit her and give her a quick kiss on the top of her head before he left for school.

*****

Kyle's family would find out just before the funeral that a bunch of the witnesses to Charlie's beating had filmed it...and it was a beating. A group of three or four girls, it was hard to tell with the shaky camera footage, punching and kicking at Charlie. One of the girls grabbed her by the hair and swung her into a locker. Kyle only watched the footage once...and even then, not all the way through. It was all he could do to not vomit.

The kids that took the video shared it amongst each other of course. Then, on Sunday evening, it started being posted to social media. By the time Charlie got off the bus on Monday morning, the whole school knew about the incident. The taunting was merciless. She wanted Kyle or her parents to protect her...but she knew they couldn't...not here. Here she was alone. Her innocent soul didn't know how to deal with the hate. She had only ever been shown love by those closest to her. When the hate and the cruelty descended on her, she didn't know how to process it. She just knew that one day was enough. She could not go through another.

Statistics show that many marriages do not last though the death of a child and Kyle's parents' marriage was no different. It did not survive the year. His mother had become withdrawn and almost emotionless. His father turned to drinking.

They sold the house and split the proceeds. Neither of his parents wanting to live their anymore due to the memories. Kyle went with his mother as he didn't like how his father's drinking was affecting him.

Kyle's mother had worked from home since COVID, so could pretty much work anywhere...but she wasn't spiteful and wanted to make sure Kyle's father was close enough to be in his life. They moved about an hour away from their old life. Kyle never asked, but he felt like his mother had almost chosen the town they lived in at random. Given the way his mother appeared to sleepwalk through life at that point, it was probably true.

They had moved just before Kyle started his senior year. His size and athleticism immediately drew the attention of the football coach, which Kyle politely declined. He had played on the varsity team as a sophomore at his old school, but any joy in the sport died with Charlie. He did use the school's gym regularly. His quiet focus, dedication and strength impressed and even slightly frightened those that saw his workouts. Which were often discussed in hushed tones amongst those that had witnessed them.

Kyle eventually became acquaintances with some of his classmates. They couldn't be called friends. You shared with friends, even confided in some of them. He wasn't ready for that.

He mostly kept to himself and concentrated on his studies. Until the bullying incident of course. After the charges were dropped against him, he was suspended for a further week, but was allowed to collect and complete his assignments while he was out. He graduated on time and went to a small state college.

*****

It was during college that he was finally able to start healing. He occasionally tried to date and some of the girls were genuinely sweet. But given how he looked, he generally attracted the cheerleader type of girls to him. While the girls he dated may have been sweet, the social circles they moved in always contained some of the same cruel people he saw in the popular cliques back in high school. The same type of clique that turned on Charlie. He would inevitably end the relationships before he found himself in a situation that would only lead to trouble.

He was glad to find that his parents were healing too. His mother started returning to her emotive self. His father stopped drinking. Kyle was thankful that his father didn't have to hit rock bottom before he realized what it was doing. They never talked about it, but Kyle just assumed that his father realized that the alcohol did nothing to remove the pain.

There was no reconciliation to look forward to between his parents. While they were healing, they still emerged as changed people. His father eventually started dating a nice woman that Kyle got along well with. His mother one day decided to quit her job and pour her savings into a failing deli in the town center. Kyle helped her renovate it when he was on break from college. His mother invested in the industrial sized equipment she would need to make pasta like she used to at home. She found suppliers that could provide the quality of ingredients she needed.

It didn't happen overnight, and of course the first year was hard. But through word of mouth, then great online reviews, and finally a few writeups in some influential food blogs, the business started to take off.

*****

Kyle graduated college and decided to move back in with his mother and help her at the deli. She was shorthanded and found that most employees these days weren't interested in putting in the months of work it took to be proficient in pasta making. This meant she did it all herself while still having to do all the work a small business required, and it was taking a toll on her. Kyle needed little training as he'd been making pasta with his mother since he was a small boy. It was actually his mother, Charlotte and himself that would make it together, but he would always push that thought from his mind.

Besides already having the skillset of making pasta, Kyle had something most employees lacked...he cared. This was his mother's business, and he remembered the love she put into the pasta they made for their family dinners. Kyle tried to put that same love and caring into the pasta he made for her deli, albeit on a much larger scale.

Kyle was finishing up the last tray of tortellini when his mind started drifting towards Claire and his earlier discussion with John. He went into the walk-in and put the last ray on the rack. Exiting the walk-in, he paused and reached into his pocket. He pulled Clair's shopping list and examined it. He liked the way she wrote her P's and R's with exaggerated bubbles. He like how neat and orderly it was. It appeared that she had written her list by aisle so she did not have to hunt up and down the list to ensure she had everything she needed.

It wasn't quite closing time yet, but Kyle took off his apron and stuck his head out front.

"Hey mom, I finished everything back here. I have an errand to run, would you mind if I cut out a few minutes early?"

"What do you have to do?" His mother asked. It was not in an accusatory tone; she knew how hard Kyle worked to help make her business a success. It was more out of curiosity. While he had seemed much better after college than when he started, she was as well, he still was somewhat reserved compared to the happy teenager he had been before that horrible incident. As such he had a schedule that he rarely deviated from. Except for the occasional trip to the local bar on a Friday night, he rarely went anywhere except to work and the gym.

"I just have to pick something up at the store."

It was an answer without any information, which was what she was asking for...but he was a good son and she never worried about him getting in trouble. If he wanted to tell her, he would have, and if he didn't want to, he probably had his reasons, so she let it drop.

"Ok, well be careful."

"I will mom, thanks."

He went out back towards his truck, hopped in and headed towards the market.

For not the first time today, and definitely not the last, he wondered what the hell he was doing. He stared up the shelves of jarred pasta sauce. With an Italian mother, the idea of eating pasta sauce out of jar was heresy. He skipped the pasta sauce on the list and headed for the next item. He chuckled as he saw Arborio rice on the list.

"Someone is making risotto." He thought to himself. After gathering everything on the list he headed back to the fruit and vegetable aisle to grab some shallots.

After paying, he hopped back into his truck and headed back to his mother's deli. She had closed by this point, so Kyle used his key to get in. Punching in the alarm code, he headed towards the shelves in the back of the store and grabbed two jars of his mother's homemade sauce...and it is sauce. Don't ever call it gravy. Gravy goes on your Thanksgiving turkey.

Making sure to turn the alarm back on, he locked up and headed out. Fifteen minutes later he was heading down 513 about to pass the junction with 14.

"What the hell are you doing Kyle" he muttered to himself.

What if she didn't live here? What if the people that did live here were armed? This was a really stupid idea he thought.

While constantly trying to talk himself out of the endeavor he had passed the intersection with 14 and started to slow down. He vaguely remembered a driveway somewhere up on the right. He started slowing further just as he noticed a mailbox and then a gravel drive. Kyle stopped on the road and looked at the mailbox. 5600 County Rt 513 it said. No name on the box though. Would that have even helped? What was her last name? He thought it started with a K.

"Well, you came all this way." Kyle thought to himself and turned down the drive. The drive turned left and went up and incline. It then turned right as it crested the hill and Kyle could see a house through the trees.

"Please don't shoot me, please don't shoot me." Kyle repeated to himself under his breath.

He came out of the trees and into a clearing that had to be several acres in size...much of it overgrown. The house was a nice size, with two stories fashioned in a colonial style. The house was white with black shutters and a red door. The door held his attention for a moment until the drive meandered around the right side of the house where the garages were.

That's when he saw the silver Honda CUV. The same Honda he remembered seeing her get in and dart out of the parking lot with this morning. This was the place. He parked his truck and walked towards the front of the house. Still praying that no one inside was armed, he knocked solidly on the front door and took a couple steps back off the porch...trying to look non-threatening. At least as non-threatening as someone who is six-foot-three, two-hundred-thirty pounds and built like an NFL linebacker could look.

He waited a few moments and casually tried to look through the window to see if there was any movement. Nothing. He then noticed the doorbell. "Duh, should have used that first." He thought. He rang the bell and assumed his nonchalant position again. Still nothing.

He walked around the side of the house and took a peek towards the backyard. The lawn in the back was mowed in a strip that went out to the woods. He noticed some fencing out along the tree line which he assumed was a garden. He still didn't see anyone and decided that it might be prudent to leave in case there was someone inside that had called the police.

Heading back towards his truck, he paused. He then headed to his passenger door, opened it and fished through his glovebox for the pen he always kept in there. He turned the shopping list over and wrote a note. He put the list in one of the grocery totes he had bought and headed back towards the house. He thought about putting the groceries on the front porch, but what if she didn't use that entrance? He peeked around back again and noticed the walkway led directly from her car to an entrance that looked like it was just past the garage. He walked over, took a peek into what looked like a mudroom. He saw some small sneakers and boots near the door and figured this was as good a spot as any. He removed the ground beef from one of the bags...he didn't want to attract critters and didn't know how long it would be before she returned...and headed back to his truck.

Satisfied that this was definitely one of the dumber endeavors he had undertaken, he started his truck and headed back out the drive and back towards home.

*****

It had taken Claire the better part of an hour to calm down after she reached her spot. Memories it had taken five years to bury had come flooding back and it took her that much time to go through them all. Why did she have to see him? Why did he have to be there on a Tuesday morning? She'd have to find a new market to go to. That alone filled her with anxiety. It had taken the better part of six months after her parents passed to find her routine at this one start to feel comfortable. She would just have to order online again. Her garden would start producing vegetables soon. Maybe she could try one of those online meal services. One where you chose the recipes and they sent the ingredients to you. She had read a review of some of them on one of the food blogs she occasionally read. She'd have to try and find that article again when she got back in the house.

She subtly shook her head. Thinking about groceries and meal plans were not going to help her past this. She wondered if it would have been better if she had run into one of her tormenters instead. The name-calling and cruel practical jokes she was used to.

She remembered back to the time in eighth grade when someone had smeared ketchup on the back of her skirt. She hadn't even known it was there. She was so used to the snickering and laughing in her presence that she just ignored it at this point. It probably went on for several classes when one of the teachers whisked her off to the nurse's office. The nurse led her to where one of the beds was and pulled the curtain around them. She told Claire to take her skirt off. Being shy, Claire didn't feel comfortable taking her skirt of and quietly protested. The nurse insisted and while Claire was slowly unzipping her skirt she went into a halting description of the birds and the bees. Once her skirt was removed, Claire understood and the teacher that brought her down confirmed. They had put the ketchup on her skirt and had told everyone that she had her period for the first time in school.

Claire explained to the nurse that she had been having her period for a few months now and that her parents had told her all about reproduction and a woman's menstrual cycle. They tried to wash the ketchup out of her skirt, but it had stained and left a red smear on the white material. Her mother was called to pick her up and take her home. Some of her classmates saw Claire being led out of the school by her mother. In their minds it just solidified that the rumor was true.

Her mother had gone to the office to protest again about the treatment of her daughter. The administration plead that nothing could be done since they didn't know who had put the ketchup on her. They assured her that they would continue to look for the culprit and punish them accordingly. Claire's mother had heard this same story a dozen times at this point and knew that nothing would come of it. This didn't sit well with her, but neither did confrontation. She collected Claire and went home.

*****

It was a little colder today. Not so many insects out. No ripples in her pond to grab her attention. There were more squirrels though. Their frantic scurrying through the underbrush did not lend to the peaceful, relaxing atmosphere Claire needed at this moment.

Reliving the past cruelties that her classmates had imposed on her didn't really bother her anymore. It was all she knew. It was her normal. But seeing Kyle had stabbed at her. A sharp pain in her heart she had only ever felt twice before. The first was when her parents passed. It wasn't right away. It was months later that Claire realized that they were the only love she had in her life. It took more than a few trips to her spot to work out what was going on. A slowly opening hole in her soul. It was so slight at first that she barely noticed it. But as time went on, as she tried to find routine to her life without her parents in it, she felt the maw opening wider. That's when she realized: she was truly, utterly, completely, alone. The only people who had ever loved her were gone forever. She spent most of that day at her spot bawling, crying and sniffling. It took several weeks to come to terms with the realization. She lost weight that she couldn't afford to lose and spent more time in bed than any person should.

Slowly, over a period of months, Claire began to recover. Starting her garden and her cooking were welcome distractions and added to the routine she desperately needed. She got to a point with her routine where she was comfortable. She was still lonely, but she had always been lonely and knew that she could deal with it.

That's what she thought at least. Bumping into Kyle had once again upended that notion and not for the first time.

*****

Claire remembered waiting patiently. Her blank expression and lack of reaction usually made them bored and move on. Later she remembered feeling a little bad for Sam, the classmate who stood over her. He was tall, but also overweight, which caused his classmates to pick on him as well. She could almost understand Sam's frustration. The need to lash out at someone. Unfortunately, he didn't lash out at those that bullied him. He lashed out at Claire...and he did it just as Kyle was coming down the hallway.

She was annoyed when Sam knocked the books from her hand. Except for a shove on occasion from one of the girls, they mostly never got physical with her. She hoped that her term paper didn't get trampled by the sea of students circling and egging him on.

Annoyance turned to shock when there was a blur and a sickening crunching noise. She turned to her right to follow the motion. She saw Kyle grab the front of Sam's shirt with his right hand. She then noticed all the blood dripping on Kyle's hand and her eyes followed it to its source. Sam's nose bent in a sickly direction. Blood pouring from it. Kyle pulled back slowly with his left hand. Then with a quickness she had never seen before, his fist lashed out and caught him high on his cheek, next to his eye. His head snapped around so fast that some of the blood was flung from his face and on to Claire and a few other students in the immediate vicinity.