The Magnificent Eight

I don't know who I felt more sorry for, Amy or myself. I wanted to say something but didn't know what and couldn't make the words in my befuddled state. She looked at me shaking her head. She knew the problem was far deeper than an unexpected failure to lunch. I was rejecting her. Perhaps the conscious me wasn't but deep down the fundamental, Neanderthal was. My deep core viewed her as unclean. I wanted to reach her to try wipe away some of her pain, but I also wanted to shout and berate her for ambushing me like this and drive home how it was all her fault, but she brushed me aside and jumped up having gone from sad to angry and stormed out. I heard her bedroom door slam shut and then silence.

We had crossed a threshold. Up till now she had probably laboured under the belief that my wounded pride would heal or that my love for her would win out. But, now we were forced to come to terms that my love for her was not wining and I had rejected her in a way that left almost no room for an easy come-back. Reconciliation had disappeared in the rear view mirror amongst the dust of our broken marriage. We both knew that if not final it was so close to final as to make no difference.

She now probably thought of me as the villain who had stabbed the heart of the woman who loved him and was trying to make things right... Whether I liked it or not, my body had betrayed me at a moment I needed to show her that there was a way back if we somehow found the means and the desire to go there. Amy had driven a knife in our marriage but I had gone back and twisted it. I lay sleepless in the dark, with real fear in my heart. Up to now I had viewed the possibility of us parting as a theoretical problem. Now it was real and my heart ached ready to burst. I waited and waited for sleep to come until I couldn't any more. I got up, got dressed for gym and drove out.

I once again worked out until it hurt. When I finished, I went back to an empty house. It was only seven in the morning but she was gone. I decided there and then that It was time to confront the problem. I switched on my old phone and checked Amy's location She was at the office. I climbed into the car and headed there. It was early for a typical Friday but three Jeeps and three Porsches were there. I gained entry using my magnetic card and walked into an empty reception but there was the sound of voices from the boardroom. I walked closer and I heard them.

"There's got to be some way." That was Garry. "Jarrod you're his closest and oldest friend. Talk to him!"

"Fuck that, he broke my nose!"

"So what!" That was Olivia. "This is not just about you and Tim any more. It's gone beyond that. It's the whole company and all our livelihood at stake now!"

"And what have you done about it?" Jarrod again. "And where IS Carla?" That was obviously addressed at Hugo.

Hugo gave what sounded like an embarrassed cough. "She's... She's at her parents place."

"At a time like this?" Jarrod again

"She's, uh, she's moved out, guys. She's moved out."

I didn't have to see his face to picture how distraught he was. There was a general hubbub of everybody talking at once. The women especially Michelle and Olivia trying to comfort him, I could hear Amy sniffing softly in the background. After a while it was Michelle that brought the meeting back to order.

"You have to make things right with Tim, Amy. Without him we're sunk" Michelle was the realist of the group. She saw the problem and addressed the problem. "Jarrod and Garry don't have a clue as to what's in Tim's head and if he doesn't step up we won't only owe Tesla ten bar but we'll also become the industry joke and no-one will deal with us again." She took a deep breath. "Hell, we probably won't even be able to get a job anywhere!"

"That's not only Amy's burden." Garry and Olivia were defending Amy.

"Just fuck him senseless." That was Jarrod. "He loves you completely and utterly. How hard can it be to bring him round."

Amy broke into a wail and called him an asshole.

"My marriage is hanging by a thread." She said angrily. "Or less!" We fucked up. I... I fucked up! There's no going back and I don't know what to do or try." She sniffed but sounded more in control than I had heard since it all began. "It's only a matter of time before Tim starts divorce proceedings and if he doesn't I, simply don't know, unless something fundamentally changes I may have to. Neither of us can continue to live this way. You don't know what it's like living with someone who hates you." She sniffed hard. "I'll be looking for a small furnished apartment today and moving out of the house by the end of the weekend in any case. I need to give us space because living like this is killing me."

"Don't be stupid!" Jarrod again. "You can't make right if you're not there. He'll pack up and leave and the company is toast..."

"This is such a fuck-up." Olivia again. Carla's left Hugo and now Amy's talking divorce."

They huddled re-hashing everything. Hugo was unimpressed by everything and clearly only cared about getting his wife back. Michelle was pissed with him because he wasn't buying into the 'working for the greater good' narrative, which she said consisted of telling Carla to come back and seduce me so we could get this whole thing on an even keel. Olivia begrudgingly agreed with her.

Hugo told everybody that they could all 'fuck right off' with that idea. "That ship has sailed". He said. From there on, it turned into a shouting match of them against him. I felt no pity for him. I'm sure he had enjoyed fucking Olivia.

I realised there was no point in going in. Everybody was in it for themselves and it truly looked like it was over so I left quietly while the argument went back and forth. No-one saw me come or go. They could find my logged entry if they checked, or on the video camera's recording but why would anyone look and why would it matter if they did?

I left and called the Erik Taylor & Ass. law firm from my car. They had been recommended to me and I needed advice. I spoke with the founding partner and after telling him what I wanted he said he'd work on it and get his PA to set up an appointment.

_____________________________________________

I had to get away from everyone and especially Amy and especially if she was coming home to pack and leave for her new place. I also needed to give my mind a re-set which I wasn't going to achieve staying at home with the ghost of Amy wondering through the house. So with that in mind, I went home and packed a small bag and headed for the Lollapalooza Music Festival at Chicago's Grant Park. It had started on Thursday and ran on till Sunday. I booked tickets and hotel accommodation via my phone while I drove the three hours there. It was the typical huge event it always was. I spent the weekend drinking beer, eating food from vendor trucks and enjoying live music. Made friends, shared drinks. Puffed on some weed. Lost those friends in the crowd and made new ones and went along. Over the weekend a couple of hotties rubbed up against me at different times and looked keen but after my previous sexual encounter I felt gun shy so I pretended not to notice their advances until they lost interest and went elsewhere. I caught Bruno Mars, Jack White, the Arctic Monkeys, LL Cool, Post Malone, Camilla Cabello and Franz Ferdinand amongst others. It was awesome and the sound was exceptional.

Monday dawned with my music appetite sated and there had been long moments I had escaped the pain of losing Amy. Now I was driving back to Springfield and to my DUI trial the next day. I drove straight to Erik Taylor's law office for the appointment we had made. We went over what I had requested and asked him to send the documents to our company attorney David Blumenthal immediately and a second different document to Amy Newhouse, nee Stockton.

We had separate accounts but the house that was in both our names so the documents sent to Amy from Taylor & Ass gave her power of attorney to dispose of the property as she saw fit and to transfer to my attorney's trust account fifty percent of the proceeds (if any) after paying off the remaining mortgage. Should she chose to remain in the house there was provision for her to buy out my equity. Our cars were in our personal names. Mine was paid for and Amy's was about half there, but it was in her name as was the bank loan so I was clear.

Thereafter I went home. It was immediately obvious that Amy had already moved out. most of her clothes and personal things were gone. I ignored the emptiness as best I could and started boxing personal things I didn't want. I focused on getting the job done fast and packed and sealed boxes that I would be dropping off at the Salvation Army. At the end I was left with about a quarter of my clothes, my books and Apple Mac. Looking around downstairs I saw our wedding album on the coffee table in the lounge. For one mean moment I considered burning it in our back yard fire-pit but I put the thought aside as petty. I'd let her do whatever she wanted with it instead.

I was nearly done when the house phone rang. It was my parents. They wanted to know why I wasn't answering my cell phone. I told them I had cancelled the contract. They wanted to know what was going on between me and Amy as my in-laws had contacted them. I told them we were splitting. They were shocked. Then they wanted to know why? I told them to ask Amy.

My Dad was disgusted with my cavalier attitude and said if I didn't want to tell them the problem that was fine by him. My Mom said that two people so loving and in love with each other should be able to work out anything. I said some things were unworkable. I gave them my new number after making her promise that she would not give it out to anyone especially not Amy. My Mom was crying on the phone and my Dad was by now extremely pissed off at me. I always thought he preferred Amy to me. I warned them that if they gave Amy my number our relationship would be over.

"Fine be like that!" That was Dad. Mom cried harder but eventually confirmed that she understood.

I left all the furniture, photographs, everything we had built up together alone. She could do with it as she wanted but I needed to cut the umbilical to my previous life and start a new one. I ordered food and while I waited the house phone rang again. This time it was Amy's parents.

They wanted to know what was going on. I told them that Amy and I were splitting. There was a long shocked silence on the other side and I thought they had put down the phone when they started bombarding me with questions. I said I wouldn't discuss it but I wasn't happy that five years of marriage ha d just gone down the drain. Her Father tried to fish if I had done something wrong and started to suggest that perhaps I had strayed. I got seriously pissed off.

"Listen here Kevin, I did nothing wrong! Nothing! If you want to know why we're splitting ask your daughter, but I'm telling you right here and now that I'm not to blame!" Well, if I was dead honest then I'd have to admit that I hadn't been very helpful but Amy had just gone and made things worse at every step and our friends hadn't helped.

There was a long silence from their end. Her Mom tried to ask me if there was any hope for a reconciliation and I said that anything was possible but that it was unlikely. I tried not make it sound any more brutal than it already was. We tried our best to be polite under the circumstances. They probably had no idea what was going on and at least were siding with their daughter which was more than my parents had done.

The food arrived and I walked into the kitchen to find a sealed envelope addressed 'To Tim' in Amy's handwriting on the kitchen counter. I ignored it. I watched TV and ate. I fell asleep on the couch and woke up the next morning with a sore neck. I showered, dressed and proceeded to court.

Erik Taylor represented me personally. He sat with the Prosecuting Attorney and managed to swing a deal wherein I pled guilty to a lesser, reckless driving offense. I received a $500 dollar fine and sentenced to attend a twelve hours of driving school classes spread over six weeks. My driving record was taken into account and my licence wasn't revoked. I received my instructions with date, place and time, made payment and walked out.

I went home for the last time and packed my bags, emptied the fridge and took all the food in the house to my neighbour. He knew we were separating having noticed the comings and goings and gave me some sage advice.

"If you can save your marriage, you owe it to yourself to try Tim. Second marriages have an even higher likelihood to end in divorce than first one's and unless the spouse has committed one of the three deadly marriage sins, abuse, addiction or adultery, finding a new partner simply swops one set of issues for another and you go through a crazy period of losing your identity and trying to forge a new one."

He frowned. "In fact, of the three it's only abuse that is totally unforgivable."

I looked at him with new respect realising he'd got the t-shirt at some time. I thanked him and we shook hands. His last words were that he hoped to be my neighbour again someday.

I went back inside and took off my wedding band and left it on the unopened envelope in the kitchen. I locked up and left the keys on the table. I left through the garage.

I wanted to walk away angry so it would numb the pain but I couldn't summon the anger I needed. I had regret washing through me making my legs weak and I almost tripped. All I could think was of our dashed hopes and dreams. Would Amy find them with someone else or would she discard them for a newer set of dreams and hopes in line with the more worldly wise mature woman she was now as opposed to the young love struck lovers we were when we listed our hearts desires and made promises to each other.

I leaned against the car feeling thin and light like paper. Like I was about to blow away when a sudden bout of nausea dropped me to my knees and I threw--up and continued to dry heave long after there was nothing left.

Later that afternoon, I moved into a small long term motel paying for sixty days in advance. I spent my days at gym and on the phone to Robert Holt discussing the Tungsten Agglomeration issue. On Thursdays I went to Traffic School Classes that I was sentenced to attend. My days were bad but the nights were hell. I kept waking up desperately feeling for Amy only to discover myself in a strange bed. I wanted to call her but my new phone had less than ten numbers saved and hers was not one of them. As the weeks progressed, my body ached with desire for her. To feel her body pressed against me. To suck her nipples into my mouth like I would swallow them. To feel and taste her heat and to feel her warm tight welcome around my hard cock. I tried jerking off to release the tension but then anger, remorse and Images of her with Jarrod would invariably kill my erection and leave me feeling worse than before.

Six weeks had passed and I had finally attended my last class. It was time to move on. That night she opened my door and walked in shedding clothes as she came. I tried to stand up but she pushed me down hard and sat on me sliding her hot, slippery pussy over my cock. She grabbed my balls and rolled them in her palm and leaned in promising to milk me dry just like that first day we had made love. Next thing I knew she was riding me cowgirl style and I was cuming inside her for all I was worth.

I woke up devastated, from the first wet dream I'd had since I was thirteen. I hated her and I hated my weakness in almost equal measure.

That morning I was to meet with my partners at the offices of Taylor & Ass. to discuss my exit from the company. I walked into the meeting unintentionally late. There were six plus one of them on one side of the table. Amy, Michelle, Jarrod, Olivia, Garry, Hugo and David Blumenthal. No Carla.

On my side was Erik Taylor, and a female associate. They were all dressed professionally. I arrived in the crumpled khakis I had worn everyday that week with a five day stubble, a two day golf shirt in sneakers without socks.

"Jesus Tim. You look like..." Michelle started than petered out. Amy flicked her eyes to me and away without expression.

"Not your problem. Where's Carla?" Like I didn't know. They stammered and hummed until I lost patience. "Let's just get started then."

The documents were passed around. And everybody had a look. In essence I wanted out immediately and to be paid one eighth or 12.5% of the company's present value. It equated to One million, seven hundred and fifty thousand dollars give or take a few dollars. It excluded the ten million advance from Tesla.

"All this because you didn't have sex with Carla!" Jarrod got nasty fast and I saw Amy flinch and return her eyes to the document. I wondered if she was actually reading it or just avoiding making eye contact with me. Hugo rolled his eyes upwards. Garry looked at the walls and Olivia was the only one to keep eye contact. 'I'm sorry' she mouthed and I nodded my appreciation.

"The business relationship between Mr. Newhouse and the other shareholders is irredeemably shattered." Erik stepped in. This is not a blame game, we're here to negotiate an equitable exit.

And with that, the back and forth began. The sticking point was that if I left, the Tesla contract would collapse. I told them that it would collapse regardless as I wouldn't be carrying them on this. Then the shouting started. I stood firm. They countered that if the Tesla contract was voided the company would collapse in any case and not only wouldn't there be any value left but there may be liabilities that I'd also have to face.

I said if that's the case I'd phone Elon Musk myself and tell him that Drive Tek was incapable of completing the project and he should immediately sue to have his capital returned. I would also take the company's inability to fulfil the contract, public.

It then became personal. Jarrod stood up and told me I was looking for a beating. Garry pulled him down and told him to cool it. "I don't know what he's been doing." He pointed my way. "But he's as big as he ever was when we were rowing competitively." I guess the last seven or eight weeks of intense gym daily had made a difference. To be honest I noticed that my waist was smaller and shirts were tighter but I'd spent little time in front of mirrors as the last thing I wanted was to look at my morose face.

"Everybody stop." A voice I knew so well pierced through all the others. "Stop! Everybody stop." She held up her hand palm out.

"Please Tim, can I talk to you alone for five minutes?" she was pleading with me and I couldn't be a complete asshole so I nodded my assent. "Can we have the room?" she looked at everybody. I nodded again and they all slowly filed out until it was only the two of us sitting on opposites sides of the table.

"You, uh... You look big and ripped Tim." She smiled wistfully. "Like you did in Korea." I sunk back in my chair as unwanted memories flashed before me. Why was she been nice to me. I wanted her to snap and argue and fight so I could lash out and make her hurt the way I was hurting inside. "But you also look tired, I can see it in your eyes... And you're dressed so..." She ran dry.

I looked back at her properly for the first time. She looked washed out. She had lost weight. Her cheek bones looked sharp her hair was dull and her clothes looked loose on her. It broke my heart and I felt my eyes getting murky. "You've lost weight Amy." She nodded.

"All the stress. The company, my parents... Your parents as well!" She looked like she had a nervous tick below her left eye.

"Please Amy, Don't make me the bad guy in this with our parents."

"I', I won't. I haven't. I've already told my mom and dad that I'm to blame." She wrung her hands nervously. "It's all on me."