The Meek Shall Pt. 05

Mom smiled because Carol did not flinch at her vulgarity.

"I noticed he enjoys lying with men, which is specifically forbidden in the Hebrew laws he exploited to fulfil his own lust. Is he going to hell?"

Neither woman knew that the pastor had already entered an Earthly purgatory and the jaws of his hell loomed.

Carol almost panicked, remembering she loved women, too. Then she remembered Pastor Laurie.

"Pastor Laurie says that carnal love is separate from genuine love and cannot be a sin that keeps me from God. We can share freely with all believers or not. She says pleasure is not a sin."

"So you agree with me you can love Frank, fuck Frank, have your old life with Frank and still have salvation?" Mom said, "even if Frank does not believe."

Mom did not know if that worked, and she had not discussed it with Laurie beforehand, but she had little patience and knew that sometime one just had to kick a door in. Her approach actually fit with Laurie's plan. Mom just jumped a few steps ahead of what Laurie believed was possible. Carol crumpled on the seat and burst into tears and racking sobs. Mom slid near and took her in her arms.

"My sweet child, my lovely Carol, we love you and you are whole. Your God loves you and his judgment will be on the loving Carol we all know. You sharing your love without condition is the love Christ asked you to do. Your pastor, or no one else but your God, can declare anything a sin in his eyes. Anyone like your pastor, who I think is a horrible person, by the way, has no right or authority to do so. Men wrote the Bible and men created churches. Jesus never mentioned a church in his name. Churches and religions only serve the selfishness of those who create and operate them."

Mom hugged tighter and kissed Carol on the head. Mom had no embarrassment that as a sceptic, she quoted the scriptures like a Billy Graham acolyte. Sunday school had been many years ago, and she did not know if she had simply invented some of it.

"Pastor Laurie said the same in different words. She absolved me of my sins, past and future." Carol said.

Mom had never heard such nonsense, and she knew Laurie well enough that she was unlikely to have actually said that or assumed the power to forgive sin. Since Carol believed she had, Carol might also believe she could be the old Carol Frank loved and Carol the believer and be happy. Mom knew if Carol could not find happiness, Frank never would.

"We love you, Carol, without judgement. Frank loves you and always will. We just want the old Carol to be back, but you also must want that and be happy as well in your faith. Please tell me you can do it, or at least try."

Carol's sobbing stopped, and she sat up. Suddenly, she smiled and hugged Mom. Laurie's weeks of prayer and gentle guidance and Frank having shared her bed without demand or judgement washed her in love.

Tears threatened once more.

"No judgement," Mom said, "we make no judgment."

"I'm sorry," Carol said.

"You have nothing to be sorry for," Mom said. "That church raped you. They drugged you with faith and exploited that. They used your heart as a date rape drug."

"Thank you, mother Connor. Oh, God, I have treated Frank so badly."

Carol jumped up and rushed into the house.

"Frank," she cried, "Frank, come with me, now."

Mom watched Carol drag her bewildered son, Carol's husband, off the porch and towards the church. Mom guessed they would end up naked in bed in five minutes. Carol and Pat stepped onto the porch.

"Jesus, Mom," Pat said. "I heard all that. You should do therapy. You're good."

"I didn't know you knew the Bible so well," Laurie said. "I thought you were an atheist."

"I'm only a sceptic," Mom said. "Atheism is a religion in itself. Carol had a religious-bigot mother, I had a religious-zealot mother, but mine wasn't a bigot or judgmental. Sunday school was mandatory, believing optional. Just because I think it's bullshit doesn't mean I don't know it or even what it is supposed to mean. I argue like jujitsu and use my opponent's strengths against them. Dad's a powerful man, so I always win and he hates it."

Mom laughed and looked Laurie in the eye.

"Frank tells me you do the same."

The laughter was genuine.

"Mrs. Connor," Laurie said. "Can we have another beer with you? I think Carol and Frank are catching up, and I hate loud noises, so we will stay here and help keep Dad Connor from drinking too much brown pop."

"I thought you liked loud noises," Pat said. "You make them so much."

Carol surprised Frank by leading him into the church and to the altar area, although in the United Church it was simply the front of the sanctuary with an empty cross dominating the wall. Poor churches like the one in Grandview had never afforded a full pipe organ.

"Why are we here?" Frank asked.

Carol knelt on the carpeted platform, took Frank's hands and said,

"I want to swear before you and God that I will from this day forward, love, honour and respect you and do everything I can to bless you and our marriage, to bring you joy and show you the love my faith demands I give to you."

Frank's eyes teared. He knelt, clasping Carol's hands.

"I, Frank Connor, swear to honour you, love you, cherish you as I always have and will always do, and I will return your love and find happiness in your happiness."

They collapsed into each other's arms, clung tightly with tears mingling on cheeks. Sobs of happiness echoed in the chamber and their lips found the others.

Their embrace and kiss was gentle, loving, bonding as it used to be in the afterglow of one of their old, wild fucking sessions. Frank thought the past two plus years had been one long, painful orgasm that had now led to a profound feeling of pleasure.

Frank held Carol's face in his hands, looked at her and said,

"I love you, Carol Connor."

"I love you, Frank Connor." Carol smiled and suddenly, "I love you; I love you; I love you."

Carol's shouts of joy rang loud, the loud sounds that Laurie had complained about but would have brought her joy, if she and Pat had not been sharing a beer with Mom Connor and giggling at the sound of Dad's snore that drifted from the parlour onto the front porch.

"He never could hold his turkey," Mom laughed.

***

Part six will come soon and be the end of this phase of the story of Frank and Carol. There are some loose ends to tie up and several characters I would like to return to.

I like nicer outcomes for people and think that in life; people with options and resources likely go on with life in a good way. I avoid the culture that thinks violence, vendetta and revenge are the way to resolve problems. Even in the violent culture of the USA, most Americans find the path of peaceful compromise and go on with life.

There is too much sadness in the world to bother with stories of enhanced personal angst and anger. The gentler way has enough pain on its own, and giving the reader vicarious satisfaction in fictional revenge does not appeal to me. I do; however, like to slam hypocritical people like the insiders of the exaggerated church I have drawn here. Although I don't believe in karma or a mythical hell, I think on Earth, if people run on a forest path with their eyes closed, they will eventually trip on a root. In this story, Frank and Carol's love, and the IRS and FBI provide the root that trips them up. In that part, I found my personal catharsis.