All Comments on 'The Meteorite Pt. 01'

I enjoy stories with a magical twist to them, especially if they involve horny women with big tits, and this has promise.

However, you need to either a) get an editor, or b) take some time to proof read your story before submitting it. You have plenty of typos dotted throughout - things like "baron wasteland" instead of "barren wasteland" - that could easily be picked up by a good editor.

Hope you take this in the spirit it's meant: constructive criticism, with the hope you'll continue writing.

they would spread out into pairs of two

redundant... at the very least it s/b

they would spread out into pairs