The Protocol of Ahab Ch. 01

I was afraid the alcohol would make me be too open, so I paused and thought a bit. "A divorce" I finally blurted. "Not yet final. I wanted out of the Midwest. Did some research. Thought I could get a job and afford to live here." I raised my glass in mock salute and added, "I knew I could not afford Manhattan."

Rachel laughed.

"What brought you here, if I may ask?"

"A relationship. I had been with this guy since undergrad and all through his med school. He landed an internship in town, and we moved here. Things change. When the residency was up, he wanted to practice elsewhere, and I wanted to stay. He left and I stayed. There was no angst whatsoever. You would think that after all that time together there would be a twinge of regret. Nope. Our affection for each other did not change but our ideas about life certainly did, so we wistfully parted."

The brief monologue flowed so easily, I was certain she had repeated it several times, perhaps even rehearsing it aloud as she looked in the mirror.

"Do you keep in touch?" I tentatively inquired.

"Sort of. A couple times a year we might meet up. If he is in town for a conference or I am travelling through his area. Nothing really planned, just a phone call if we are in the same vicinity."

"What do you do? Talk about old times? Try to restart the relationship?"

Rachel drew a long sip of her cocktail, paused for a moment, and then slowly exhaled making a low, shrill whistle as she did. "Well, if you really must know, we fuck. We don't make love; we just fuck. Think of it as Auld Lang Synge on New Year's Eve. It is fun but the next day it is over."

"Like your tryst with Visnow?" I added attempting to clarify her statement.

"Exactly. Only with Visnow it was a one-time fling. No repeat performances."

Before I could think of a response, she stood up. "Need another drink?" I stared at my half empty glass. "You will in a minute, but I'll make you another while I am up."

I suddenly felt like I had been too nosy. It really isn't any of my business who she sleeps with; or who she is in love with. Her casualness led me to pry a bit too much. Maybe I hurt her feelings. Twilight was waning; neighborhood noises drifted in the open window; Rachel turned on a lamp with a very dim bulb casting eerie shadows about the room, I suddenly felt I had lost the closest thing I had to a friend; I was mortified, and I just wanted her to leave.

Rachel mixed the drinks. Picked up hers and took a gulp, then topped it off with bourbon. She then rooted around in her canvas purse, pulled out a plastic bag and held it up. "Want a joint?"

I stammered, "I have never done that."

"What? Didn't you go to college?" She chuckled as she sat down on the floor and held up the wrinkled joint between her thumb and forefinger.

"I have never even tried." I reiterated.

"I'm not forcing you too. Do you mind if I do?"

My midwestern guilt perked to the surface. Open windows! Someone would catch the smell and call the police. I would have a record and never get a good job. My stomach turned as a lump formed on my throat. "Shouldn't you close the window?" I suggested thinking that would prevent detection.

"We could but I think a little ventilation would be preferable. Do you want to try?"

I know I shouldn't I said to myself but if I turned her down, she may leave and never speak to me again. I was caught. "OK. I'll try it. But I have never even smoked a cigarette and don't think I can inhale."

"I'll teach you." And with that she clenched the joint between her lips and lit it with a pocket lighter. The tapered end smoldered softly but grew to a red ember as she sucked the pungent vapor deep into her lungs. She took the joint from her lips and passed it to me as she held her breath to get the full impact of the pot. I puckered like an adolescent's first kiss and pulled the smoke into my mouth, held it for a few moments and blew it out in a long steady puff before passing it back to Rachel. It felt hot and acrid on my tongue, and I did not inhale.

"How is it?" Rachel asked.

"OK, I guess." I had no frame of reference.

"You need to breathe it in. If not, the best you get is a good contact high and you can get that standing on most street corners after the bars close."

I took that as a slight admonishment and not a put down. She took another drag and returned it. "Need another drink?" as she stood to return to the table. The room was hazy, and a mild euphoria affected me. "You should make them by the pitcher" I joked and laughed aloud as I said so.

I quickly took another drag and dropped the short segment of the joint on the coffee table as it burned my finger. "Shit. That hurt!" I whipped my hand to take away the sting. The marijuana smoke created a soft-focus effect as I looked over at Rachel who seemed spectral though the haze. "I burned my finger." We both laughed.

She then reached over head with one arm in a stretching motion as if to yawn. It was then I noticed her blouse was not tucked into her waistband. It was also unbuttoned. I felt a surge of anxiety followed by a gentle wave of unconcern as I noticed.

She returned to the floor next me and lit another joint. "Have you gotten tired of it yet?"

"No" I dared, not wanting to show any sign of cowardice.

"Good. I can give you a lesson on how to inhale if you like." I could not reply soon enough. "Here is what you do. Take a deep breath. When I tap you on the forehead, exhale through your mouth. I will handle the rest." Rachel took a couple short shallow drags followed by a long deep draw. When her lungs were full, she turned and tapped my forehead; I expelled as much air from my lungs as I could. With that, she pinched my nose closed, placed her mouth to mine and exhaled steadily. Reflexively I drew in her pungent breath. I stifled a cough and held the fumes inside as long as I could and the exhaled in a sudden cough.

My head felt mildly dizzy as the pot acted on my nervous system. I should have been ashamed of what happened but didn't; rather I was overtaken by a giddiness that I had never felt before. "Wow" I added, "that made a difference." The room seemed to slowly wobble.

"Want to try doing it yourself or do you want another lesson?"

Why I answered as I did, I will never understand but Rachel, sucked on the joint, again tapped my forehead and pinched my nostrils and put her mouth to mine. This time was different. Instead of a steady rush of second lung pot smoke there was a gently coupling of our lips as the smoke escaped from our mouths and wafted about our faces. When the exchange of smoke was complete, Rachel separated but remained close enough to lubricate my lips with her tongue. As she did my hand touched her bare side and my fingers grazed the seam of her bra. "I shouldn't be doing this." I protested.

Rachel pulled back but my hand drifted up her bare side underneath her blouse. She shrugged and the blouse floated off her shoulder to the floor. My fingers traced along the edge of her bra and lightly brushed across her breasts. The feeling was unique. So many timed my breasts have been groped, caressed, and cuddled but, except for my solitary love making, I have never touched a woman's breast. Idly and with no pressure I softly felt her.

Somewhere in my conscience I was aware I should not be doing these things, smoking grass, drinking, and sensuously touching someone of the same sex. I was confused. The sensation of touching Rachel's breast aroused and shamed me. The guilt and the uncertainty made me draw my hand away.

Rachel's face was still just inches from mine. I felt her breath against my cheek and in a husky whisper she asked, "Don't you want to see me naked?"

Not knowing why, I answered "Yes."

Rachel began to stand. She shed her bra in a single motion as she was rising. A twist of her fingers and her slacks opened and dropped to her ankles. In the hazy atmosphere a white cotton thong shrouded the delta. She toyed with the waistband before artfully stepping from them. My hand rubbed lightly up the front of her thigh almost to her hip but stopped just inches from her trimmed pubic region. My eyes focused as best they could on the small cleft visible at the lower point of the triangle. I felt she possessed me. "You can touch." She uttered softly but I heard it as a command. My fingers softly traced a path across the velvety mound to the tempting slit; then stopped and looked up. Our eyes met. She sensed my apprehension as she knelt and faced me. "I will leave now if you want." Her voice was detached and unemotional devoid of subjectivity, placing the burden of the decision squarely on me. I felt lightheaded but I had made my decision and now must act. 'What I've dared, I've willed; and what I've willed, I'll do!' raced through my mind. I answered by leaning forward and kissing her breast. First lightly as I would the cheek of a child. Rachel straightened so her breast jutted closer. I became more fervent. I pressed my teeth to the white flesh, bit and sucked. Rachel trembled. "That hurts, that hurts." I balked, "Don't stop", she muttered. I continued biting and sucking over the soft white flesh until my lips settled on her nipple. With abandon, I took it in my mouth and violently pulled with all the suction my cheeks could muster. Her body swayed back but I did not release and reined her back with teeth and lips. Her hands wrapped around my head forcing my face onto her welted breast.

I relaxed my lip lock and rocked back panting. My breathing evened out, "Don't you want to see me naked?" I returned her question.

"Oh god yes! Yes, I do."

"Well then you need to undress me."

Her fingers moved with lightning speed to my blouse. Starting with the top, each button slipped through her fingers and separated. The final button, which was below my skirt waist, she effortlessly retrieved and undid. With agonizingly slow tenderness, she parted the blouse and moved her hands to cup both my breasts. I closed my eyes as she tenderly caressed each one with a slow rotating motion. I purred.

The next instant she was standing over me pulling at my arm to bring me to my feet. I rose. She surveyed me like a sculptor deciding which spot of marble to chip away next. She motioned me to turn, and I did. She then unsnapped my bra and let it fall. I felt her hands glide over my back feeling my shoulders, spine, ribs and lastly hips, unsnapping the side button of my skirt as she did. I took a baby step forward as her hands eased inside the elastic of my slip and in one fluid motion she dropped to her knees and pulled my skirt and slip to the floor. I stepped from them but did not turn towards her. She ran her hands up the back of my legs and kneaded her fingers into my ass. A strange desire, a longing, a need to satisfy something that was lacking swelled in me as she lowered her hand and slid it down the crack of my ass between my thighs and rested with her fingertips probing for my clit. I bent forward to accommodate the gentle intruder, but she stopped and began to gingerly tug my panties down; slowly at first as until they cleared my hips and then directly down.

I turned. Rachel squatted before me reading curves, creases, scars, blemishes, every aspect of my body. When our eyes met, they remained locked as she rose and eased me to the futon. I momentarily lost my balance and sat. She pushed me back and crawled beside me, never losing eye contact. We embraced and kissed. It was deep and long and as sensuous of any I ever had. Our bodies pressed together; our mouths, breasts, bellies, hips, legs, and feet all touched along a carnal meridian.

Rachel placed her hands on my temples, kissed me then slowly pushed me down. I kissed her chin, and then neck as her gentle hydraulic forced me lower. At her breasts I sampled her nipples with my tongue again sucking them fiercely. This was broken when she pushed harder. I knew what she had in mind and was not sure I could meet her expectations.

'What I've dared, I've willed; and what I've willed, I'll do!' Captain Ahab's protocol kept going through my head but this time it was not to convince me as much as to reinforce my resolve.

I let Rachel's arms maneuvered me off the end of the futon and between her legs. She positioned my face, spread her thighs, and pulled me towards her. I touched the end of her slit with my tongue and dragged it up and down over her lips. I reminisced about the hundreds or thousands of times a tongue licked me there and now I experienced what caused that sensation. I licked lazily letting my tongue slip in her as the warm moist walls collapse on my tongue. Her tart juices flowed in my mouth and rolled off my lips and down my chin. I was enraptured.

Rachel retook control and steered me into her pleasure. "Here, here! Harder, harder! Softer! Gentler!" She urged as I explored her." More, more" she coaxed. With abandon I zeroed in on her firm clit and drew deep. Rachel trembled. Hungrily I pulled and sucked wanting her to explode in my mouth. As I worked, she whined; sharp wincing wails each time I applied suction. Her hands again grabbed my head. She spread her legs wider angling her feet over my shoulders. I pursed my lips over her clit and pulled fiercely. "That hurts! Don't stop!" she contrarily begged as I continued. Her back arched and turned from side to side as I pursued her with laser like focus. "Uh, uh, uh" she choked out followed by a loud deep moan and her body listed to one side and relaxed like an uncoiled spring.

I too relaxed and let my head rest on her velvety mound. I was satisfied. I had not come but I was satisfied. My partner was satisfied, and I felt a warmth I never felt before. I was complete.

Her warm hands caressed my head and I looked up at a soft contented smile. A nod drew me towards her, and I crawled up and rested my head on her shoulder. I listened as her breathing slowly return to normal. Her nipples, even under my gentle touch, lost their firmness.

Rachel turned slightly and wedged her knee between my thighs. I complied and as I did, she wrestled me on top of her. Our breasts touched as I straddled her waist and her tongue strained to reach my ear. I shimmied up slightly as she gently bit my lobe and tugged. A shiver went down my spine as I cuddled closer to let her continue.

She whispered softly into my ear "Was that your first time?"

"Yes"

"You are very good." And she continued to nibble my lobe. Her hands reached my ass and grabbed my cheeks; gently at first and then strongly with her fingernails digging into my flesh. I squirmed at the first sense of pain but pushed back as I wanted more. As she continued the harsh lovely kneading, I moved my ass in rhythm with her groping. "You have a nice heiney" She breathed into my ear, "I want it." I giggled at the term my mother used for my bottom when I was a child.

I complied as her rough gripping of my ass coaxed me farther up. With small skids I crept up her torso until my head touch the wall at the end of the futon. At that point, I rose on my knees and leaned against the wall. I looked down. Rachel slowly disappeared between my legs until I only observed the upper half of her face. Just before her mouth disappeared from view, she smiled and blew me a kiss.

Her first assault was a long slow lick along the length of my labia. My mind raced back over the army of hungry mouths that shared that meal. This was the most fulfilling. Her tongue entered and probed deep. I felt her tongue thicken and slop around my inner walls. I murmured something incomprehensible. My face rested against the wall letting the dry plaster cool my face. Rachel continued here expert stimulation varying her technique just enough to increase my arousal with each nuanced change. Each time I adjusted my hips thinking it would stimulate me, she moved my in another direction and caused my passion to flare even more. My juices flowed freely from my vagina against my thighs causing her cheeks to adhere to me as she licked. Her licking turned to sucking and soft lapping became a slurping sound.

She then attacked!

With fierceness I had never experienced her mouth locked onto my clit. She was an animal intent on devouring me completely. She pulled. I strained to escape but as I did, she increased her ferocity. A sexual remora, attached to a host, sucking me until I could no longer relent. My clit was on fire, chafed with desire; my temples throbbed; my pulse raced and pounded in my head; every muscle in my body tensed as the carnal pressure reached a boiling point. I gasped for breath thinking I would die. I was lightheaded; the room vibrated; I moaned or yelled as I came violently like I never had in my life. My arms collapsed. My only support was the wall pressing against my face. The room smelled of warm underarm, musky spent pussy, and humid air. My sweat and spit coated the plaster. I licked and tasted the dry-wet amalgam of plaster and paint. I thought I was dead.

What happened next, I don't recall. I awoke when a chill breeze wafted across my bare body. I was huddled next to Rachel. Her leg swung over my hips and her arm around my shoulder. I roused. So did Rachel. She wrestled the cover from behind her and covered us. I reached with my foot and caught the lower hem with my toe and coaxed it over our legs and snuggled closer for warmth.

I was about to doze off again when she softly pleaded "I love you."

I did not know how to respond.