All Comments on 'The Recluse'

While I would classify this as a *non-erotic* category story much more than a romance, it was still a good read. Thanks!

Started off like a Faulkner novel and ended with a bang. Great job! I love a happy ending. Thanks for your work.

reasonable man

Great job creating an enthralling story with plenty of plot twists and a main character that the reader cares about. Loved the local Richmond references. Hope you tried the Cuban Roast Pork and the Tres Leches cake at Kuba Kuba.

The plot is the best of it. Some, not all, of the characters are well developed.

The lack of editing is all too apparent.

The fourth time "college" was spelled "collage" nearly persuaded this reader to move on to an author who gives a damn about language.

Thanks Grimm

Yes, I debated about where to put it, but because I’d entered my first effort into romance, also maybe by mistake, I just put this there as well. Sorry if the wrong category caused anyone dissatisfaction.

Too many names to keep straight.

First person all the way except for one paragraph in chapter two. And it had nothing to do with the story at all. What’s with that?

Not really a romance at all.

“Collage” is an art form using multiple images together, not a place of higher education.

I think that it’s ironic that the main protagonist, a writer, “writes” so poorly.

Please avail yourself of one of the many excellent editors on this site who will work with you to make your submissions so much better.

Not, great story. Hard to see where it was going but finished strong. 5

One might make a collage of their college days, but colleagues from college rarely make a collage.

Also, while it is an overworked convention, it would have helped to have a more complete physical introduction to Angeline right at the start. Maybe it's just me, but I keep thinking she was the one with the silver hair. I didn't get a good enough introduction to those 4 women to place them correctly on the board.

extremely readable, keep it up!

I thoroughly enjoyed your work. I could not not finish it in one session. Well done!!

Thanks for the great story! I really enjoyed it but I think it probably belongs in the non-erotic category much more than romance.

I enjoyed your story. It was very well written... You must be a professional writer. If you aren't, you should be. Besides your knowledge of inside corporate workings...you explain things well. I almost understand. That says a lot about your abilities! Good luck and thank you for an enjoyable read

The story itself was fine but it certainly wasnt a romance.

I think some of it needed to be fleshed out a little more, particularly the last page and the relationship between Brad and Angie.

It got a bit lost at times.

You made the fundamental error of including things the narrator neither witnessed nor was told about. Story loses effectiveness when this occurs.

Otherwise, an enjoyable yarn.

Very good writing and very good story!

Some might not like the financial info: I had to look up a few financial terms and learned something. Thnaks!

t of time I spent a lot of trips driving on the 95 from Durham, NC to northern NJ and am familiar with the area you wrote. The trip through southern VA is nice -but not during the rush!

5 *****

Burninglove

Nice.

Well written...kept my attention...thoroughly enjoyed it!

I love stories like this with all the detail and you did a really good job with accuracy in a situation like this. Just an overall good story. Thanks for sharing.

Started gently and slowly with plenty of detail setting the scene but difficult to keep track of the important ones then quickened up but thought that after the board meeting it seemed to rush towards the end too quickly.

Other than that a very enjoyable yarn.

5 stars.

Had to stop reading after 1 page of whining how mean everybody was to the MC and he still became hugely successful...

... for another excellent and well crafted story. I’m glad that I read the prequel, Jerome’s Story, first. It did indeed provide background information that made reading this one much more interesting.

Really good but I got a bit confused with all the conspiracy details. However still a 5 star story.

Creative

I loved that you got the finance stuff right too!

What made it better was that I read the later-in-time written prequel all about Brad’s Grandfather Jerome first. As such, reading this story with all of the family history in mind just gave this story that much more substance.

And BTW — great job on that prequel “Jeromes’s Story” as well. Not an easy task to write a prequel that enhances an earlier story so well.

5*****!!

great story

A good story. I used to be in commercial real estate, but the details of all the dealings got a bit much for me.

I enjoyed it, good work

Veered off into Richard Gerald territory with minute details regarding the companies and financials, but I did manage to muddle my way through that to finish what was a solid story.

More like a thriller than a romance since Brad's wooing of Angelina really only takes up.about 1/4 of the story pages if that. Well written with family dynamics, my only critique is with some of the grammar and use of words plus in some cases the writing felt awkward to me. Not a big deal but an editor could help make an otherwise we'll plotted story even better.

Good story but a bit confusing because of the name mixup between Karl and Kurt.

I really enjoyed the read & have now read all your stories to date, please continue to write more, thank you.

Helluva story

Yeah, great story with plenty of twists and turns and a bit of romance thrown in. Keep me interested until the end. Possible second chapter eh?

That is not what I expected. Especially because I read ‘Jerome’s Story’ first and treated it as a prologue. It took me a little bit to get on board, I guess because I expected it to be, more or less, an extension of ‘Jerome’s Story’. Once I realized ‘The Recluse’ is fundamentally a tale of business intrigue (with a pleasing splash of romance), I enjoyed it a great deal. The subject is a little out of my wheelhouse, which is a large part of why I found it so fascinating. I look forward to reading the rest of your submissions. Thank you very much.

The good: plot and some of the characters. I read it 'cover to cover' with interest and enjoyed the story.

The not-so-good: At times the style is late 19th c. Think Henry James or Pérez Galdós, with sentences that go on and on. It doesn't ever fall into Rienzi territory but comes too close for comfort. And then there is a short, punchy sentence worthy of Elmore Leonard. In short, pick a style, stick to it, and polish it.

You have some good skills. I look forward to reading more of your work.

Thanks,

l77

Maybe a bit too much minutia concerning the fraud aspect. Hard to believe there was no desire for justice to be served. Uncle George just gets pumped full of lead, almost dies and just sucks it up. Literally taking not just one but six for the team. That was very unsettling.

enjoyable, I just wish you were aware of manor (house) and manner (theway things happen) Wrong word usage is akin to fingernails on a blackboard

Anonymous on 2/23/21 captured my thoughts almost exactly. All the boring details of the corporate world and the attempted fraud, in my opinion, added nothing to the story. It only made it longer. Overall, I really liked the story. 5*

Great story. Gave it a five. I am normally one of the BTB crowd but that doesn’t mean that I can’t appreciate a good story that’s not BTB. Wasn’t really thrilled by the end where everybody basically got off the hook with no criminal charges But that’s obviously the writers prerogative.

OUTSTANDING.

chur m8 awsum story

⭐⭐⭐⭐

keep writing, I really enjoyed all of your stories.

Loved this. Thank you.

For what it’s worth, I’m a reasonably bright guy (several graduate degrees) but some of the financial stuff was beyond me. I suspect I’m not alone in that. At a number of points I needed either more details (so someone without a finance background could understand what was happening) or fewer details (so I wouldn’t be puzzling over things for which I lacked the necessary background). It’s hard, because details make a story concrete, vivid, and interesting; but too many details that are comprehensible and of interest only to those familiar with the subject can bore or confuse readers who know less about the subject. I enjoyed the story an awful lot; I think I would’ve enjoyed it even more if I could have followed the financial schemes. But, again, thanks.

Another story from this

author that I enjoyed.

A delicious romp through corporate machinations, bucolic living, and cavalier writing! Loved the arc and the characters!

In addition to the good story line, I am surprised that I understood most of the intrigue and financial shenanigans. Since I am clueless about corporate and financial stuff, that means that you are a pretty good author. 5*

First off George should be disinheriting his son Andrew. Andrew picked Karl over his Dad and tried to cheat the company. As for the murder, someone had to tell the killer where George would be and when to shoot him. This attempt on George’s life was setup in less than 24 hours so there had to be an inside informant. Since Karl and Andrew were the only ones who knew where George would be and they were directly involved with the fraud, it had to be one of them. Mostly likely it was Karl so George would have realized this. So the author made a bad decision on not allowing George to tell the police about Karl’s probable involvement. I believe that Karl was an accessory. I think one or more of the other company’s principles were involved with setting up the hit.

Thanks for the imaginative ans well written story!!!

5 stars - great story - keep writing

5 star story, enjoyed the family drama though the fact members of the family got off so light with a fraud plot that led to an attempted murder was a little bothersome. Other then that great story.

Love the story. I think it is great. AAAAAA++++++

Please write novels - your stuff is too good to be shortened because everyone on this site has a short attention span -me included! Another solid 5*

Excellent story, although mixing up the name Karl & Kurt throughout as his brother was a bit confusing.

A re-read for me. A good, well written story. I'd have been happier with some sexual content beyond PG-13 levels but that's a minor quibble.

Brilliant. It actually had a PLOT! As with any good story, explicit sex is uncalled for and here was sterling proof of that.

I appreciated the 'high fallutin' English but you tripped up a few places yet it was enjoyable to read something using language a tad above that used by junior high schoolers.

Definitley worth multiple re-reads. It does not easily happen that something on this site make me carry my iPad around with me to read wherever time allows.

Worth every appraisal given and it is placed among a small section of stories I consider way above five stars.

Saluté!!

The whore Jessica got away with quite a bit....where was the payback!!

The mother and brother Karl were bastards!!

This MC should man up

Good story but overdid the company affairs

interesting and the "soft corruption" of various "good meaning politicians" always interests me, so many examples show up so often. Thanks for not having needless sex scenes and still showing a happy, loving ending.

Enjoyed the story as it made my imagination work. Just find it a little hard to understand a land swap worth 20 plus Million for actually just an option to buy a 12 million or appraised 6 million property. I guess outright greed is in every man.

Love this. Prequel even better. TV mini series here

Prequel really brought this together! Thank you! Will read, again, and again, ...

Outstanding prose. Thank you very much!

Damn man!! Both stories woven together just make for a dope (Blackrandy!) combination. I guess dope = totally outstanding. Thank you so much for the great read, very entertaining. Kudos big time for your writing prowess. Now I need to peruse more of your great scribblings.

About 3 pages too long. You have a habit of just filling space with mind-numbing details unnecessary to the flow of the story. I'm not sure if you're trying to impress the readers or just come across as self-absorbed. Do yourself a favor, find an editor, you desperately need one.