All Comments on 'The Reluctant Journey Ch. 08'

I hope Cain was wrong and that they do have a happy ending. This was a great read, I can't wait for the next chapter. :)

I hope he does fall in love with her. I'm really loving this story. Definitely one of the best I've read on this site and I've read a lot. Great job!

The problem is he doesn't think he deserves love. The mother isn't helping. Can't wait for more darling this is an awesome read. Damn stupid thing I'm on my phone and it wasn't done loading so my 5 star rating turned into 3 stars ss

Love the storyline.....totally looking forward to the next chapter....

More,more...My favourite story on this site by far, can't wait for the next installment.

Grrrr....the stars aren't working" 5+*

Neat little psychological thing there.... Cain making Malia choose a path...

Bark burn! Ouch, ouch, ouch!

Growly bear hiding the wounded beast....sigh.

The journey may be getting less reluctant, but don't move it now. Don't want to have to hunt for it. Then again, seems the reluctance is still here, just HIS now.

J/F

Of course Malia loves Cain!! Can't wait for the next chapter. There is no doubt in my mind that Cain is already in love with her too. And he needs her! Especially being stuck with that mother of his. Hopefully she can lose her bitterness and love her son unconditionally like she should. She obviously blames him for not only the accident that killed Cain's friend and maimed Tristan, but the untimely, early death of her husband. Maybe Malia can get through to her...

Wonderful, just wonderful! Each Installment sucks me further and further into this amazing story. Cain is a character that deliciously irritates me, I love him and yet I want to smack him upside the head constantly. Malia is such a wonderfully rounded character and I always enjoy reading her perspective on things. The last two chapters have really tugged at my heart strings and I'm anxiously awaiting the next chapter so I can better understand the heart rending dysfunctional dynamics of cain's life.

" Her libido seemed to be too much in overdrive for anything else to seep through. " haha, you have a great way of putting it, this (and many other moments) really made me giggle.

Loved the arguing, and the sexual tension, and Cain not being able to resist her, and Cain generally being pretty damn hot and fine, all the time! And love it that he now keeps telling her to not go out looking for him, wherever he goes LOL :) (she deserves it :).

The bit with Blake's POV was interesting, looking forward to seeing what he's cooking up. I do sympathise with him, you’ve written him well. And nice to see Cain viewed through someone else’s eyes, Blake’s probably right, Cain is a bit of a bratty little rich kid playing with his dad’s money and enjoying the easy ride through the ranks with his dad’s influence.. and I agree, if that’s the case, he is way out of order trying to shove his position in Blake’s face.. and what a bunch of asshole –kids if they ostracised Blake due to his family not being so well off (though this could all just be Blake being jealous). But of course there’s the whole ‘poor little rich kid’ –side to that, Cain not being able to distance himself from all that and gaining something of merit, just due to his own abilities, not daddy's influence.. hmm, nice one, works well with the bit at the grandma's house.

So Malia is falling pretty hard for Cain, physically and at the end, emotionally, as well, which I understand as I think you want to move the story along and develop her feelings. But if i'm honest, on the level of her behaviour, this doesn't sit that comfortably with me, as before this she got his attention due to being different from all the other girls who had been throwing themselves on him his whole life. And now after he had sex with her, she's lovesick and pitying of him like any young girl, which is just what he seems to be expecting from her. Her horniness I can relate to, as he seems pretty smokin' :), although as this is non-con, I think I enjoy the "girl fighting/resisting/being a challenge, boy dominant/insistent/losing control" -dynamic more than the girl almost begging him for it -type one :), but it's nice that she got some consensual sexual experience with him, and is realising her sexual impact on him. And he can be surprisingly skillful when he wants to :).

I hope that Cain will stay strong and dominant with her, and that Malia will perhaps find the strength to try to not jump him (to stay interesting to him), and still resist Cain in other ways as well.. oh, and someone said earlier, that it would be lovely if he revelled in the fact that he has her all to himself now, untouched by any other man...

Well, I think I just love the power play and tension between them.

Sorry about the huge comment, loving the story a lot, and can't wait to read more. xxx

Especially how the relationship between Cain and Malia is building up. Love all the "snarky" exchanges between Cain and Malia. Clearly she has fallen for him and she has gotten under his skin. I am assuming that you have run this story through an editor? If so he or she miss a few things. There were a couple of run on sentences and there was one paragraph where practically every sentence started with a "She". Still get a 5 stars from me.

Darlin92,

I was so happy when I found this chapter posted today. I love how Cain and Malia are dancing around each other. You have done a great job of building not only the sexual tension, but laying what makes Cain vulnerable underneath that yummy exterior. I loved that you found a way for him to introduce her to his grandma and mother so we can see into his family. Can't wait for the next chapter.

LB

Finally it's up! Gosh I was getting worried.

@inspector123: I do not use an editor. I think I take long enough to write on my own without making everyone wait even longer. I know that I have an issue with run-ons. It's been pointed out to me by all of my teachers since middle school. If I haven't fixed it by now I'm not sure I ever will, sorry :) . I don't really like to reread the entire story once it is finally done because I start second-guessing it and plus it can be pretty time consuming with 15+ word pages to get through. Thanks for the love despite grammatical errors though :)

@evonna: huge comments are what I live for, do not be sorry. I love your insights as well as others. It's interesting to see what worked and what didn't. For example, I was surprised that you were sympathetic towards Blake until I reread his part without any bias I have about him. I'm happy you liked the 'do not follow me' parts, I giggled a little when I wrote those. I will keep in mind that Cain should revel in Malia only being touched by him. My hero, in case you haven't noticed :), has a bit of an arrogant streak so this wouldn't be much of a stretch for him.

@Kittencuddler: Thank you. I'm glad you like Malia too. I mean I like Cain, but I think she gets kind of overlooked sometimes because he's so overbearing. I know people have previously stated that she isn't such a strong heroine, and I'm working on giving her more opportunities to show her strength.

@J/F: Very insightful. It seems, at this moment at least, that he would seem to be the one who is reluctant. Glad you liked the path choosing as well.

@everyone else: I know I don't respond to all of your comments, but I do love them and I definitely read all of them. I'm thrilled once again that you guys seem to approve. I hope I can continue to please. I am working on chapter 9 but it is still in its early stages.

@LB: You snuck your comment in as I was posting my long rant of responses :) . I have been looking for your upcoming chapter with increasing frequency btw, hoping it will be up tomorrow. I wasn't sure how to introduce Cain's mother, though I wanted her disapproval of him to be shown. I'm glad you approve, I was worried about how natural the impromptu birthday dinner would seem.

This chapter definitely didn't disappoint. Malia is just awesome. Her reactions are so believable, she is strong and vulnerable at the same time... I just love her. Cain is gradually redeeming himself too. I hope he doesn't act like a colossal asshole to push her away.

This chapter was a good length but it just flew by and left me wanting more. That's a talent.

Looking forward to the next chapter!

If Cain feels so guilty and acknowledges his mother is "right" (disagreed) about him being guilty, then why are he and Malia lying to her about his situation and the manor? I might be mixing my stories, but correct me if I'm wrong, he's kidnapped and repeatedly raped Malia. That might not quite be a brothel, but it certainly is something he'd feel guilty about if he had all the decency that Malia is suddenly making him out to have.

Sounds to me like Cain is playing mind games, and Malia has fallen for it hook, line, and sinker.

I think poor Malia is suffering from magical dick syndrome. Cain rapes her ( It's rape even if she came around, the only reason she came around was because he didn't give her a choice) and now she's in love? I get attracted , many women fantasize about their rapist it gives them control back so that's not too un common. This makes her seem like the child Cain is always accusing her of. He kidnapped her, took her from her family, and she's over that all ready ? That's just not too plausible. Unless she's confused? Up until she said she loves him I was on board. I just think it's rushed. Don't get me wrong, want them to hook up, not until he makes an effort to actually treat her right. Just saying.

I love this story and look forward to the next chapter. I love how they argue and the dynamics between the two of them and seeing such harsh treatment helps you see where his shields come from. Keep going!!!! If nothing else you can rest assured I shall be waiting for and then reading the next chapter.

And wasn't disappointed! Where will they go from here? Cain is unusual I think, although typically he is an alpha male, of which there are many on lit, I like the fact you are making him vulnerable even against his wishes and very damaged. It gives him a darker edge. Malia, oh dear dearie you are going to be in for a bumpy ride :) loving this one!

Yes it might be good to see her grow a little bit stronger,although her strength comes from her thinking things through. She has never been in a position to be powerful so therefore its difficult to write I should imagine. Can't wait to see where this goes and whether the truth comes out about The Units, that they are containment camps in disguise, I am a bit confused on that score so more info would be good. I would like Malia to lead the way! thanks for the great read. M.

@anonymous #7: Cain has a lot he feels guilty about, but kidnapping Malia still isn't really on that list. He justifies it, he was trying to atone for hurting Tristan by trying and help him get the family Tristan won't attempt to acquire for himself. They didn't lie because he necessarily regrets doing what he did to get Malia, but more because it would be really uncomfortable for everyone involved if they'd told the truth to their mother and grandmother. Not to mention the fact that now they are trying to elaborately cover the whole thing up as far as the public is concerned. Cain isn't necessarily trying to protect his own reputation but is more looking out for Tristan and Malia. (plus it is his grandma's birthday, he wasn't really wanting to make a scene.)

@evilpandaqueen: Thank you for the polite and constructive criticism. There is generally one part of the chapter that really makes me nervous as to what the reactions will be. Congrats, you found it on this one. I was kind of worried that I may be rushing the love. But to try and defend myself: Malia's recognition of herself falling in love with Cain comes after the outburst from his mother and his subsequent refusal to defend himself. She is falling for him after seeing the vulnerable parts of him, not directly after having sex (though it is a factor). I don't want to say that she is 'over' him kidnapping her away from her family, but it isn't really in the forefront of her mind at the moment as they are going to be reunited and freed from and imprisonment they didn't know they were in. But in a lot of ways I think Malia is still confused, at least she is still fighting it. Her declaration in her mind isn't exactly thrilled, she knows she shouldn't love Cain, or be attracted to him, or like him, but she does and I think it scares her. Ughhh I wasn't going to do that. I do appreciate the critique. I don't want to argue against it when it comes out, just trying to clarify my intentions if nothing else. :)

@Mayness: You have no idea how hard it is to try and make up scenes where Malia has a chance to be strong. Without that specific critique of her character there would never have been the bookshelves/computer/soldiers at lunch scenes. Those where my attempts for her to show some rebellion without Cain loosing too much face. I do plan on going back to the units, I wont just leave them hanging. Thank you for the support :)

I love this story, I was excited to see this chapter posted! I can't wait for the next one Darlin92! Keep up the good work!

This is such a great story and unique too. One thing I'm not clear on: Why are some sectors of the population forced to live in collectives and are denied the right to free travel, and land ownership, while other sectors (namely the upper class) allowed own large amounts of land and travel freely throughout the country?

@ Literoticareader99: I plan on elaborating more on the units, but to answer your question I think Cain explained this somewhat in one of the earlier chapters. There was a terrible civil war in the country and people formed these units as protection when the country was in semi-anarchy. When the country was rebuilt however, these units weren't aware of it and eventually became run by the new government (i.e. Blake Denizen = director of unit 118). The population of the new rebuilt country were the people that hadn't joined a unit, not necessarily all upper class, but a lot of political and military officials. They saw the people that had joined a unit as traders to their country. In order to placate the new and fragile government they were left as they were without their knowledge of the war ever ending. I liked how Mayness called them containment camps. They aren't being actively punished in the camps but they are unknowingly being denied the new rebuilt society.

Ugh I had to wait until I was in the car after work to read this (no, I'm not driving). I love how you just took his character from two dimensional to multidimensional in one chapter! They have to end up together, they just have to. And I can't wait until Malia is reunited with her family, though she's gonna have some 'splainin to do if she's in love with her kidnapper.

Any clue when more chapters are coming? I love love love this story! Anticipation is killing me.

@jennyb2492: Ha, I love it. She indeed is going to have some 'splainin' to do. I don't want to give a spoiler or anything but I'll just say that daddy isn't so happy with Cain. That is all I'm going to say on that.

@urgoddess: Well my dear, thank you very much for the praise but unfortunately it may be a while yet. I was writing at work today (shh don't tell) but other than that all I have is the couple of word pages I had waiting for this chapter to post. (btw word pages are unsatisfactorily short compared to lit pages). I know where I want the next chapter to go, I just have to get it there. Thanks for hanging in there with me.

Who says Lit authors don't get paid to write! We'll keep an eye out for the boss for ya!

I think you have set Cain up to have poo hitting his fan from several directions. Ha! It's going to get difficult to be all cool uber big man in charge...

J/F

I swear it's almost as fun reading the comments from my other favourite members as reading the stories! While waiting for new chapters I love reading all the commentary and I will say between this one and a couple other favourites of mine (Stolen Slave, The Last Tritan, The Rebellious Slave, Wanting It All, Possess Me, Finding Home : Odyssey) I have a lot to keep me entertained!!

Thanks!!!

Crazy! 5 out of six of those are my favorite stories too!! And I clearly love reading the comments too since I saw your comment.

@J/F: Does Cain deserve anything less? And yes I know I'm terrible, I'm glad I'm not prone to blushing when people ask me what I'm writing. Me: "Oh nothing, just doodling." :)

@Shyholly & anon: I am keeping up with all of these lovely tales as well. It feels like there is a lot of creative energy flowing, it's fantastic :)

5 stars for you but it's not working. Love this story and can't wait for ch9.

OMGosh!! I love him, I love her, I love him, I love her! I love them both. LOL I love the chemistry between them, so hot!!! If it wasn't 2:30 in the morning I would probably have some incredibly witty comment praising you but my brain isn't working properly atm. Awesome, just totally awesome. Looking forward to the next chapter!!

Sorry I didn't private message you back, I kind of like the anonymity of this site and using my email kind of kills that :). I do read all of my comments though, even the ones sent to my email (never too busy). Thank you for the praise, it made my day, so sweet. I don't know if I'm going to have this published or not, but I'm honored that you would read it repeatedly if I did. I am not good at guessing when the next one will be out, I probably should have written the entire thing before submitting chapter one but I honestly just started writing to see if I could and if people would like it. I currently only have about 6 word pages and I submit around 15-20 so I guess it all depends on if this chapter gives me any trouble or not. Sorry I can't give an actual date, I don't want people showing up with pitchforks when I don't keep to it :)

Interesting comments above. Made me think about the grandma's do again, and how at the time of reading the chap I was wondering why Cain took Malia there in the first place. I was initially thinking it was the kind of do where he needed to have a date with him, but no, it was a tiny, intimate family gathering, where she even seemed a bit out of place (no one else brought a date, everyone else was family). Just like the Anon reader above I was a little suspicious of Cain's motivations for dragging Malia along.. what exactly is he trying to pull here..? Is he trying to show her something about his family? Use her to aggravate his mother? Manipulation? Sympathy points? Getting Malia to go all soft on him? He did allow her to stroke his hand in a comforting way, which felt a little out of character.. hmm.. interesting..

@ shyholly

Thanks for listing the stories you're following, most are on my list as well, but you also gave me two new ones to look up. Thanks for that!

@evonna:

Geez, can't he just want to be nice. You mean to tell me you don't trust Cain? I can't possibly imagine why not. :)

Honestly I was just trying to come up with a scenario where Malia would be introduced to Cain's family. I see though how it is in his character to try and prevent this, as it put him in a vulnerable position. Your suspicions, I hope you'll be happy to know, have catalyzed the writing of a completely hitherto unplanned scene in chapter 9, that I hope will make the visit to grandma's a little easier to swallow. See your comments are helpful! Thanks for keeping me in line faithful readers. Hopefully my explanation for Cain's motives will not be disappointing (if they are just remember I had to come up with them on a whim). But let's not jump the gun, chapter 9 isn't finished yet. I'm working diligently though :).

I love the way you've written Malia. It seems there are a lot of Cain fans in these comments, so I thought I should speak up. I'm really looking forward to your next chapters!

Don't change not for anyone nor their comments.

I've been thoroughly enjoying each chapter and look forward to more.

Thank you for sharing yourself and your imagination with us.

I agree with the previous comment, your writing has been superb so far , so stick with your original ideas and be true to yourself you have so many fans that love your story and writing...any idea when the next chapter will be?

Alright, first off, thank you so much. You don't know the thrill it gives me to hear your kind words on my work. And it has become work! (I like doing it, but still it is very time consuming and frustrating at times). That you enjoy my writing style is one of the highest compliments to me.

@anon: I really like Malia:

I love to hear that. Most of the story is from her prospective (though chapter 9 switches back and forth between a little bit of everyone) so I love to hear that you actually like her because it's kind of redundant for me to write from her point of view if you don't.

Now about that update: I'm currently approaching 6000 words, unfortunately that means I'm only about halfway there. I could submit the chapter at where I am at the moment, but I don't really want to. I'm going to write some more tonight and see where I am there, but I really want to get to where my original plans for this chapter had me. I appreciate your patience with me and sincerely hope the waiting is well worth it.

Thanks for the update.

Its good to hear that your not dead as sometimes authours can take forever and we don't know if they are alive or dead. (Stolen Slave)

I'll read ch 09 when its posted. Please continue

But I love this story so much ill ask anyway, any idea how close u are to posting.??

Alrighty, Chapter 09 was just submitted. Time for me to bite all of my fingernails down to nubs nervously waiting for it to post. Hopefully it is closer to 3 rather than 7 days but only time will tell :) Thanks for sticking with it, I know the waiting is unbearable.

I LOVE chapter 9! When he did that thing.... And then what she said.... And all the gooey angst..... Just wonderful!

(Feel better now, Darlin'?)

we appreciate the update. Appropriate scarifices will be made to the Lit Gods for the release of ch9.

So excited!!!

have you lost your mind? Kidding I know what your doing...I'll start now too and really make Darling92's day/night/morning I guess it just depends are where you are...okay.

Oh I love ch9 its may favorite. I love the line that Cain is to hurt to say to.... and then when he...well you know...can't wait for ch10

How's that any good?

Yay! So excited for the next chapter. I, too, hope it's closer to 3 days than 7.

Lol how many are looking for chapter 9 now lol thanks darling for three update. U never disappoint for me anyways. Impatiently await litigious please hurry

Litgods lol stupid phone

Thank you for the confidence boost, I'm glad you guys like the chapter. I was cracking up at your comments.

What about the rest of us who are left at the mercy of the ether?

Just because you have read it don't let that stop you from commiting the sacrifices, voodoo rituals or whatever else seems to work with getting the next chapter out quickly.

You have a duty to complete and I expect to see columns of smoke rising to please the litgods etc...

Oh and have the fire department on standby ... Just In Case

(I haven't really read it yet either, but don't tell Darlin92. Was just trying to save what little stubs of fingers she hadn't chewed off yet from nerves. How would she type more for us? I don't know if she has voice typing software.)

:D:D:D

Hmm, well I guess I will just have to submit the entire story in comment form. It will take days to read that way but at least there will be no fire hazards. Let's see, chapter 9 was approximately 21 word pages, how many comments do you think that will take? :)

I was about to include that I don't have voice typing software, but I stand corrected. I'm still getting used to this fancy new laptop :) (my splurge of the year), but apparently it does include a dictation software. Haha I'm going to go try it out. Who needs fingers.

naughty girl, what a tease you are....we might just have to make you type out and submit many more chapters for our pleasure...

submitting through comment posting...well if they get the back log they had about a month ago... that might just have to happen,

I told them not to tell you!

If posting the chapter via comments gets it out sooner, it has my vote. As long as it is not a week between comments >:(.

I know a few authors use storiesonline.net for their stories in additon to this site. Should the wait grow too long perhaps this is an alternitive possiblity.

I am not suggesting a perminent swap just a temporary measure?

Thank you mickymouse113 for the suggestion I will keep it in mind if there is an extended wait on this chapter, my fingers are crossed.

@FA_JF: You make me laugh my dear. A little birdie told me. I do believe the art of secret keeping is dead :)

You guys are cracking me up. I'm so excited to see Ch. 9 has been submitted. I love having a new chapter to look forward to! -Lisa

Is it possible to update your bio with a short teaser for ch. 09? Just a 'few words' until the story is posted in 2-4 days time.

Just an idea.

I was upset to see that not only was it not posted yesterday, but nothing new was posted. I'm hoping it posts soon. A taste?

Cain's funeral had a surprising number of weepy guests. Malia didn't think he had that many friends. She couldn't count herself among them though. Why should she? Considering she was the one who had bashed his head in with a shovel. Arrogant bastard. Cain's mother knowingly smiled across the lowering casket at Malia. She never thought the elaborate plan would work, but the old woman had a twisty mind.

-Now this is a direction that chapter 9 does not take.

Sorry I couldn't help it. I know my sense of humor is quite warped sometimes. I will post something tomorrow if chapter 9 doesn't post. Something real this time :)

Lmao that was funny i was like wait what. your funny darling :-)

Told ya chapter 9 had gooey angst ......

Thank you pheobecharmed, I aim to please :), and indeed FA_JF you did say that, tried to warn them :)

Anyway, I have updated my profile to include a SMALL clip from chapter 9, it isn't especially long, about as long as chapter 8 was so I don't want to give too much away, but I promised so it's up, though I don't think it was nearly as exciting as my comment spoiler was. I'll leave it up to you all to judge.

LOL that comment. I was so confused for a second, haha. Thanks for the spoiler! Can't wait for the full chapter to be posted. :)

OMG you gave me a heart attack for a minute. I mean, I really had chest pain! Don't do that to us!

Off to read the real teaser.

Darlin92, That's so very very sweet of you to take my comments into account, thank you very much. But please don't take me too seriously or change your story too much, I just tend to LOVE to overanalyse every little detail to death in the stories i'm addicted to, to the point where everything is an implication of something and my head is paranoia central and everyone is up to no good. Especially the quiet ones. :)

Mickymouse - What a good idea, will run to read the chap 9 teaser! Thanks Darlin92!

You say pray to Litgods, I say email them. Selfish, yes, but come on, Hall of Fame writers shouldn't have to wait so long to be published. And every time I've dropped them a little email to the tune of "this is a Hall of Fame writer, it's taking long, readers are requesting a blog to be set up.." the story clears in no time... just sayin' !

didn't mean to sound like my emails are omnipotent :), i'm sure others are doing this as well, or it could just be a coincidence, but the theory of Litgods possibly reacting to whining via the "Report a problem" button might be worth testing further.. :)

Now will they post Ch. 9, already??

@evonna clearly the lit gods are very angry to delay pushing the latest chapter so I don't think "report a problem" trick will do it .

@FA_JF Did you say you have an unruly teenager at home? It might be time to offer him or her up to appease the lit gods. We thank you in advance for your sacrifice.

Happy 4th of July everybody!

:)) it s a great chapter!

This is so great I hope you start to write again.

“He said it full of pity, trying to avoid hurting her feelings.”

I read this bit and thought it must have been a typo, since when did anyone think saying “I’m not going to fall in love with you” in a pitying tone isn’t going to hurt someone’s feelings??