All Comments on 'The road to Samarkand'

Full circle is a good point to end. Perhaps you revisit with a stand alone story later with Peter Jr and Isabelle and take a different tact.

Good story. Glad you let Fuad be a good guy.

I loved this story and I would like you to consider extending it as one person paying a debt down and then passing on the benefits of that debt to the next deserving person.

You gave us the complete story of P & D - - and left enough to begin a new story with the next generation.

I like the ending - coming full circle into another generation. Works for me :)

Well done, I think you handled this extremely well, like your Deja-vu ending too!

"I felt betrayed in some way that I couldn't explain even to myself."

Because she chose some ridiculous fantasy of personally rebuilding a ruined country over his love and commitment to her. If she really wanted to rebuild Sarajevo, she would have graduated in Sweden, then used her education to guilt-trip a wealthy first-world nation into sending millions to aid reconstruction efforts.

Peter loved her, but Dzenita never really loved him. While he was willing to drop everything for her, she failed him repeatedly:

1) Dumped him in Sweden for an uncertain future in another country.

2) Never told Peter he was a father.

3) Only wanted to return to Sweden so she could go to university. She talks about a better life for her son, but never even mentions Peter in her reasoning.

She was incredibly selfish and neither loved or trusted Peter. I can't help feeling that she didn't deserve the love and dedication he had for her.

Too often what appears in Literotica is trite and at best vapid, one dimensional 'claptrap'.

It takes both bravery and real writing skill to draw together the threads of a story, such as this, where the past constantly has impacts on the now. If we are truthful to ourselves we can recognize AND admit to the times in our own lives when an off the cuff remark may have stirred an instant adverse reaction from those we may have previously thought we knew very well.

Unlike one previous adverse comment, I find the core of this tale of Dzenita as a survivor of genocide' difficulty in fully trusting someone utterly and equally believable as Peter's difficulty in comprehending and inititially accepting her lack of communication as a means of self protection. Building trust as part of a couple is different to the surface level 'friendship' the initial part of the story had shown. It is often impossible or at least difficult for a survivor of trauma to balance the conflicting impulses that family, kith and kin and places from their past can have with a new 'we'.

Overall I feel that Halin 24 has drawn out the story threads well in a superbly crafted story very worthy of 5*s. In doing so reflecting some real truths of the key thought processes that go through the principals thoughts before they achieve a means of working together into their future. The story also does well to finish by pointing up the fact that life can sometimes appear circular throwing up unexpected coincidences into the next generation - although with the principals back story is life repeating itself really that surprising in their children?

Incomplete? Rubbish, it is complete in itself and doesn't need anything added or subtractedto be a veryworthy addition to 'Romance' on Literotica.

Length is perfect.

Great story, love the full circle ending. Wish they got married.