All Comments on 'The Runaway Ch. 01'

Title says it all. I'll look for the next chapter.

more please, a hot story like this has to have more to it. I hope she stays and they become a loving couple.

great beginning, would love to read more as they weather the storm.

I hope his next load is deposited where it belongs. While this is common is stories, I don't think I have ever pulled out during or before an orgasm. Not sure how his sister managed to drag him into the house, but at least it got them naked in bed together. Chapter 2 soon?

Drugs and her other dealigns aside this was really adorable story of sibling love, she might have harboured her feelings for a long time but he (probably) isn't all that innocent either. The whole snow storm ordeal serves as a great reason for them to grow a lot closer and expand on their feelings and flame that love further. I have zero problem if their parents and other sister never find out about them and never bother to show up, they have each other and that's all it matters. Just no drugs please :)

5* and hopefully next chapter comes real soon!

but this needs editing - desperately.

"I looked outside my reading room window and can see the snow storm get worse" - first line is typical of the agonizing mixed tenses.

I hate the way people are always a critic, wake up people this is not great literature just fun little stories take it for what it is!! O yea and quit griping so much.

Yes, some parts are common but his baby sister has a beautiful body and she knows how to use it. Her "big" brother hopefully will let her stay and move in permanently. They need to work together but he needs to touch her softly, play with her lips, neck, suck her nipples and make her cum then screw her long and well to show her how much he missed her and how much he wants her body. Hopefully, she'll teach him to be a better lover and they will become an item. This is a story of several more sex filled chapters. Thanks !

Make more chapters please. Will definitely read them.

Please write more, you have the start to a wonderful story.

Is when in the first sentence I see the usage of present tense and past tense. Ask around for an editor.

Thanks for reading, liking and commenting. I understand the grammar is a little off. Will be working on it for the next chapter. I was hoping context would carry the story. Like I said before, just doing this for fun while waiting for my flight or projects. Will start churning out some better stories. Keep reading!

Good sexy story. No doubt it is missing few very obvious omissions . Good sex. Next chapter is needed.

Why don't all you English critics go jump in front of a moving train! You want perfection in your reading material then go buy a NY Times best seller and pay your $25 - $50 for it. THIS is "Free" erotica written by non-professionals for Your Free enjoyment, but you probably can't appreciate that because all you care about is making sure that you are heard as the high and mighty English Teacher - AND most of you haven't even had the guts to submit your own stories to Literotica. Do something useful and go be a real 5th grade English teacher, maybe They will appreciate your 'knowledge' of the English language! We are tired of hearing/reading your B.S.

I do not care what some grammer critics say it was an enjoyable story that needs another chapther at least. The errors were not so bad as to make you stop reading to strighten the story out in your head. More please.

This is a good story and hopefully there will be a follow on. It would be good to know why Maggie wanted a relationship with her brother and what were their lives like before, that is, how close were they before Maggie arrived at the cabin. Was there any hints of a possible developing relationship prior to where this story starts.

As far as grammar and spelling are concerned, does it really matter. As long as it isn't atrocious and doesn't affect the telling of the story. I have read many published books that contain spelling and grammar errors. Therefore to criticise an author who is writing for the enjoyment of the readers rather than for money is just unfair.

Will there ever be a 2nd or 3rd chapter?? Really good story

Surprised the parents had not called if only to tell him what had happened.

A typical, but tender love story where a baby sister falls in love with a big Brother that is caring and loving to her.

How did she get to the house?

Surely she had a car. She needed a car to run her business and store product.

With the snow she would be trapped in as well.

I hope you will add at least one more chapter. It has been almost 6 months though.

Great stuff and hoping for more soon!

No way would he pull out just shot his cum deep up inside her unprotected pussy

Could sexy Jeff have a bit of chest hair for his sister to 1) see and 2) touch and feel?

Are you the same person in a lot of stories comments asking about chest hair? Seems like you are

Shit. That seriously cracked me up. 😂

Like your writing, love the subjec and thoroughly enjoyed the story. Hope to ready a part 2.

I love your writing!!! I hope there is a chapter two in store for us!!??

chapter 2 please?

Please choose a tense and stick with it. Constantly jumping between present and past tense makes for irritating reading.

I really enjoyed it!! Him pulling out at the end kinda ruined the ending a bit for me :/ I kinda get it though... But hey, it's a fantasy, he shouldn't have to worry about pulling out at the last minute!! Hehe :)

...and for a detailed planner, having wiring exposed instead of encased in galvanized pipe, tsk! Tsk! Hehe!

Love her tiny little body!!

I really liked this chapter and think there is a lot more to the story, but are there more chapters to come, or is this a one off?

more of this story please

MAGGIE A 20 YR OLD DRUGGIE, SLUT AND LOSER

A really stupid story with a trailer park trash sister Maggie who practically raped her brother ;)

[30.11.22]

Zsexcellent!

11/10!!!!!