by Pars001
The writing is definitely rough around the edges, something I’m sure you are aware of due to your disclaimer at the beginning of the chapter. That being said, the core elements of the story are intriguing, and deserve to be developed more. I’m pleased to see this wasn’t just a wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am kind of story, you tried to develop a plot.
I for one, will be reading any follow up chapters. 4/5
Cheers,
Dennis
As with all your stories it's brilliant, your one of the few authors I keep rereading. I hope you eventually get all your stories on this site it's so much easier to find the next chapter on this one.