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All Comments on 'The Seeding Bk. 01 Ch. 04'

by Pars001

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BlanckaertBlanckaertabout 4 years ago

Did chapter get cutoff? Great story

AnonymousAnonymousabout 4 years ago
Rushed

This has the basis of a good story but it's just seems to be rushed. In your haste you're missing details or in this case repeating them, with Helen repeating that she can emerge a week ahead of the predicted schedule that she already stated in the beginning of the chapter like as if that was new information.

We know that you can write well, as in the case of your Lost Empire and Cat Fight series, so please take you time with your writings.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 4 years ago
Last sentence for alternate site.

This story is also published on SOL. The last sentence there doesn't seem chopped off like here. It reads: Then suddenly it was clear "I love you mommy and daddy I hope to see you soon!" Luckily, John caught Millie as she passed out.

MarkT63MarkT63over 2 years ago

I'm from the government and I'm here to help!!! LMAO!!!

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userPars001@Pars001
432 Stories
2216 Followers
Am a clerk here in Florida. I started writing almost three years ago again. I am dabbling in almost all genres. I hope I can bring a little enjoyment to those that have never read me. Also am an old Dom out of the life style for years. Am open to private chat with almost anyon...

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The Seeding Bk. 01 Ch. 03 Previous Part
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