All Comments on 'The Sleepover Ch. 02'

This was a fun chapter. Your writing style is still wonderful. Dialogue is believable and realistic. Narration and descriptions are clear enough without dominating the flow of the story. And let's not forget character development. All good, all well done.

The most important thing I want you to know about how to move forward with this series is that whatever you decide to do will be the best choice. I decided a while ago to try to be more appreciative of Authors' efforts, and their generosity in sharing them with us For Free (tyvm).

Having said that, my only suggestion is that whatever new couplings might take place, small scenes with high levels of resisting incest that yield to the taboo attraction. Otherwise, you wind up with Group Sex, and I find that the Incest dynamic gets too watered down, even when elegantly rendered.

More with four?

Hard to say, depends on how you handle it.

Looking forward to more !!!

It would have been the best for the story to move on without involving the parents.

It started going downhill when mom got involved and i just had to quit it the moment the dad got added. Brandon should atleast be possessive over her sister but instead he wants her to fuck her dad when she herself doesn't want it.

this series is so well written and amazing im a sucker for father daughter sex, love stories and harems so please write more i love your work! cant wait for next chapter

Both stories are so well written, The half-sister doesn't bother me. but started to lose me when the mother was added. And totally lost me when they start talking about bringing the father in.

Other problem I have is early in the story they were careful about using protection/ Then all of a sudden Brandon and Kristina are going at it with no protection. Or is this a set-up for something later on?

The name slip with dad saying Karen instead of Kelli would have been forgivable if Brandon hadn't done it also. What he should have said was "Besides, after all the fighting Kelli and I did," that would have made it look like dad just forgot her name.

I love the story so far and would love another chapter.

I love your first story and I even I liked this one but why did you to have to go with present tense, It's kind of annoying.

Really liked this story up until a parent became involved in the relationship. Don't particularly like incest stories with parent/child incest.

Loose ends need tying up please.

Will she wont she?

Will he wont he?

Will he get to 'have' the other half sister?

etc. etc.

loved the entire story until the dad was brought up. would have been a 5, but I think a 3 fits better now

I LOVE the first 10 pages of this story (combining chs 1 and 2), after that it gets a bit much. If you are to do a ch 3 which doesn't seem likely, my advice is to pull back from the parent discussion. If Lauren wants to keep playing with her mom, fine, but cut everything else out. No discussion of her relationship with Brandon to the father and no more talk of Brandon and his mom. I think the secrecy of Brandon and Lauren makes it the hot story that it is. I love the dialogue you give to this story. Some authors just focus on the sex thinking that's the hottest part, but for me it's easily the minds of the characters. The better the dialogue, the better the situations are set up and the moral dilemmas are dealt with.. I just think the hotter the story becomes. Taking this story as an example of what I'm talking about, it turns me on exponentially hearing how badly Lauren wants it, how much she craves her brother. And I love that it becomes a story about how close the two of them are as brother and sister yet marriage remains never considered. Some people take it there stupidly imo. They are brother and sister and will always remain that way, but they crave each other as well. That's hot. Well done sir.

While I couldn't rave high enough for chapter one, (whew!) this one is slowly turning me off. Bringing mom in is borderline, but dad? Total turnoff.

Personally I dont see why brother isnt agreeing with her not wanting to fuck dad. I mean, what guy wants to share his girl(s) anyway? I sure as fuck wouldnt be sharing Lauren with anyone! Sorry mom, it was a nice thought, guess deep down Im just a two woman man these days! ;)

like it very much..

hope there will be part 3 where it will be a family gathering and that is a very happy healthy family life and wish that i would be part of a loving family.

You need to keep track of the characters in the story, it's not like there are too many of them. Who is Karen? In chapter 1 the girlfriend was Kelly.

Adding the parents and (eventually, the Andrews, I assume), is a mistake. It takes away from the story and just turns it in a swapping orgy. No thanks. The whole 'Kristina is your sister' swapping debacle is a bit too contrived just to expand the swapping. It's unnecessary. If you are into wife swapping, then go to that category.

Personally, if I were Brandon or Lauren, the first thing I'd do, is ask for a paternity test, to see who my father is. After all, their mother is obviously a swinger that doesn't care who fucks her, and her husband is one of those guys that gets off watching someone else doing what he shoud be taking care of. So realistically anyone could be their father.

Incest stories are, by their very subject matter, supposed to be a very private and intimate thing. Thats part of the appeal. By making the same mistake so many other authors make, by adding in more and more characters to the mix, it's the exact opposite of what makes a good incest story, completely ruining that secret intimacy that appeals to incest fans, it's just another swapping story.

Don't worry about 'who who' owls or mistakes. It's cleaer genetic attraction drew all siblings together. And this isn't a simple cuck tale as 'mistake' implied. The mom is clearly respectful of her modified reciprocal vows. Perhaps a few glitches could be caught by a fellow lit author in careful edit prior to professional publishing. Genetic attraction is the secret thread tying the story's events together. Well done.

While I do like where it started and most of the second chapter. The whole Kristina is a Sibling, while not entirely out of nowhere with her comments about the parents at the Cabin, I don't think the Trade off for him getting to Bang his Mom is that the Sister has to Bang the Dad, if they wanted a 3rd person for the party, hell even a 5th they have 2 people from the First story that are ok with the whole Banging Brandon with the other girls. But I'm just a Reader and probably won't read the 3rd chapter because I'm not looking forward to the Dad being involved, Props to the Mom for only Banging her Daughter and not her Son because someones gotta Bang the Hubby else its cheating part. Though a Side step (Because characters have Agency and all that), They could bring the Mom in without her getting dick, Like she did while watching her Kids fuck, So long as she only has sec with Lauren (Maybe even Kristina), By all rules we know she can be involved, Not sure where cumshots/eating cum filled orifices fits in but TECHNICALLY it may or may not breach the no penis rule.

Honestly, Lauren doesn't want to do the Dad, you can have her do it, its your story and all, But we don't need to hear about it, if that makes any sense, she does it once and doesn't like it or doesn't do it at all, whatever works, Kristina really should not be given that much credit on her input because she said it herself, she isn't that experienced (only 1 person to date and it ends up being her Brother), But just because Lauren Could have sex when ever she wants, but if she isn't attracted to her Partner why bother? (That parts from Experience, Lack of attraction leads to bad sex.)

And Lauren also states that she isn't really attracted to her Dad, And that the idea is a little ew (Paraphrasing) and I can't really blame her for it. The pay offs not all that great really, and IF we end up with the Mom/Dad being regulars in the story in the Sexual way, the story is going to be Convoluted to all hell.

In conclusion, please for the love of all that is Incestuous and Holy, Please don't bring the Parents into it just for that sweet Incest Trifecta. Bring Alex back, Brandon liked her. Speaking of, Brandon wasn't sure about the Mother until a few days later either. Gotta love that Character Development.

Again, I'm late to the party on comments. I agree with parts of the comments I did read. I expected to find out the "secret" of the parents was that they were actually also brother and sister. Didn't like that they made Kristina their sister. I don't like the idea of the parents coming into the "party". Too many partners makes it confusing (just like Karen/Kelly...Kelly was Brandon's girlfriend in Chap. 1 and in Chap. 2 she is Karen?). What's next? The DNA shows that yes, Kristina is their bio sister but that her "dad" turned out to be Lauren's father and he wasn't as infertile as they thought? Then do we get the dads and Brandon to have sex with each other? I'm good with letting the story end here and using our imagination to take it any further. You could take all the comments into consideration (and I've only read about 6 of them) and make a new story using them with totally different characters. JMO Anyway, I look forward to reading more of your stories.

Seriously? No time for the ‘two-family orgy at the cabin’ follow-up chapter(s)?

You really do need to wrap this story up

Say one chapter with Mom and Dad

Then

The finale with both families at the cabin

The story at least with the kids fucking their parents

I've been following this since the very beginning with The sleepover.

"OHMYGOD" & "Unfuckingbelievable" must be favorite phrases of yours.

I want to hear about alex

but I had to read the rest just to see what everyone else meant. I agree, it was better as a private thing with just him and his sister. Kristina was okay, but it's meant to be about the two of them mostly. It's just getting weird with all the other characters (of course sex with moms just weirds me out in general). You kind of loose the taboo deliciousness when everyone starts fucking everyone, then it's like it just seems everyday, and where's the fun secret from everyone? That said, I think the answer to Lauren being unwilling to sleep with dad is to have KRISTINA do it instead. Give her a little more experience.

Speaking of which, how could they mistake the meaning when they say "we wanted artificial insemination, and your dad donated sperm" "so?" "we did it the old fashioned way" - he's her father no matter how the sperm was donated! Why would she tell them that if she wasn't saying he was the father?

And maybe I missed something, but why does he always use a condom with Kristina until suddenly on page 4 (I think) he's cumming inside of her without one?

As brilliant as it is, should have kept it simple with out adding the father(s) into it leaving the brother as the alpha male ijs

Stop the suspense, 'we' need to know what happened next !

Just get weaving - what's keeping you ?

I'm hoping they all end up in the cabin for big orgy/swapping holiday weekend.........

Rapier

Would love another chapter.

I really hope the dad's don't get involved. That would ruin the really good story you have going...

just my 2 cents...

WOW, there aren't too many step further that this can be taken - but I know a couple. Since this is many years old, I'll find out in the next chapter if they all make it all happen. Thanks again for writing such a erotic story!

what a great read. very erotic. can't wait to read chapter 3!

I agree with anonymous (01/02/18) – leave the dads out of it. As far as that goes, I think Lauren and Kristina are enough, though I'm not sure where else it can go after and incestuous bisexual three-way. I have read this and most of your other stories and while I haven't cared for all of them, when they're good, they're very very good, and when they're bad, like this one, they're fantastic. For a long time I didn't think you would top 'My Virgin Sister', but this one does. Maybe I'm just old enough to prefer young girls.

Really love it but I must point out a minor flaw that disrupted the story's flow for me. I found it made me have to double back at times to clarify what was happening when you switched back and forth between the first person and third(?) person narrative perspectives. Brandon is your Narrator but at times you refer to "Brandon" in the third person in one sentence and then switch back to "Mom" from the perspective of Brandon narrating in the next. A minor problem in what is otherwise excellent editing.

When all the girls were together Brendon had to wear a condom when he fucked Kristina . Then he starts having unprotected sex with her with no mention of any protection. Either on the pill or he ends up knocking her up.

Maybe she wants Lauren to fuck her Dad, while she fucks Brandon side-by-side, just like Mom and Dad and Mr. and Mrs. Andrews do at the cabin, That would make a cool sequel right? Also, can't help wondering if Lauren is on the pill.

Different strokes for different folks, but moms and dads gross me out. I'll stick with sisters and cousins. Thanks for the story until that stuff though.

Ya blew it

I wanna fuckkk

I gave it 5*. Like the mommy fuck, dad daughter, not so much. Maybe cause I fucked my mommy but would never do that damage to my daughters.

Why do you people feel the need to ruin a series by trying to make it more complicated than it needs to be? Adding more people into the mix doesn't help a story, and in your case completely smashes what could have been a wonderful three way romance. Such a shame, I don't think I'll even look at the next chapter.

The age differential just isn't unusual. The "endangering close families" is a much more credible objection.

good almost to this point ... too many involved when the senior generation was included ... wont read the last chapter

Too many people, too complicated now, I’m just gonna ignore the next chapter, it hurts leaving a story unfinished but I’d rather leave it with Brandon, Lauren and Kristina, just a nice happy romance between siblings.

im going to give your next chapter its first read, i hope it stays just a 3 way romance, involving mum qnd dad just RUINS whats a good love story with possible marriage and future kids.

I just encountered Literotica this year, 2019. The collection of stories is extensive with a broad range of writers with fictive imaginings. The"Sleepover" series touches many relationship threads… too many for some as we find in the comments. The imagination in chapter 1 featured four curious teen girls getting lessons from an accomplished guy. The chapter developed a special bond among a brother, sister and a friend whom the reader did not yet know was a half-sister. As the chapter ended, this reader was satisfied that the saga had concluded. Later it was discovered that there is a Chapter 02 which reveals Kristina's origins and the greater inter-family history which opens a whole new set of possibilities.

I was satisfied that the story could have ended at Chapter 01. I was settled with the number of characters in the frame. You, Sam, took Chapter 02 to threads I had not expected; your imagination is larger than mine.

I'm going to read Chapter 03 with an open mind and anticipate it will earn my "5" as did the first two chapters.

Sam, write on.

Dammit. I hoped Alex would return. Instead its kristina. Dont care for the parent thing tbh.

The first part was perfect with the 4 18 years old. Where are Alex and Kylie?.

The story is getting bored. I will not read chapter 3 anymore.

Why include the parents. It started as a nice romance not it is a dull boring story

I read chapter 1 and 2 in a single sitting, so the big picture of the story has a flow to it. I'm ok that Kelly's name got changed to Karen. She was minor anyways. What I did notice that detracted from enjoying ch 2 is how careful the characters were in ch1, to make sure Brandon had on a condom when he was with Kristina. In ch 2, Kristina simply gets Brandon many times with no mention of protection. Did she suddenly get on the pill and the reader doesn't know? I thought the first time they came together there might be an "oops" moment where they suddenly realize that they forgot the condom and panicked for a few paragraphs, but it didn't happen. Then they had sex again and again, and no one seems to notice. Is the author trying to set up a surprise pregnancy to deal with in the next chapter or is he inconsistent in writing and everybody's safe and we forget about the previous chapters and move on like nothing has happened? I don't get it. However, I've liked reading it so far and will continue, but my constructive comments I hope will help the writer to be more consistent between chapters so the story flows more smoothly.

Why include the parents?. It started as a nice romance.

Bring Back Alex .. You did not need the Parents .. To Me Alex made more sense

I’m starting to worry where this story is heading..Leave the fucking parents out of it

Bring back Alex and Kylie

You could have kept the parents out of it and could have added Alex or Kylie instead. I would have preferred that.

I was so into this and wanting more!!! Then you ruined a perfect story by adding the parents!!!

I love that they all enjoy each others love juices! A delightful pleasure ignored in too many other stories. Thank you!

' "You think I should fuck your brother, right?" The way mom said it made it a statement rather than a question. "Well then, don't you think your father deserves a reciprocal arrangement?" '

Uuuh, fuck no I don't!!! My sister's pussy belongs to ME!! MINE!! Sorry mom, I think you'd be great, but no way do I want dad's dick anywhere near my sister's body! That pussy stays in the shape of my dick, and mine alone! Hell yeah I'm double standard selfish!!!!

(Hell, honestly i didn't want mom in there either!)

Why ruin it by adding the parents?

many times before, sequels are very disappointing at best, but this was crash and burn. The parents........ REALLY!!! I won't be reading ch.3.

I find it very aggravating to read some of the negative comments here on Literotica. This is a well crafted tale about a controversial subject, and the author did a great job expressing his/her creative talent! If you don't like the subject - don't read it. If you have constructive criticism - post it in the spirit of trying to help the author & do it in a respectful manner. Keep up the good work samslam & don't let disrespectful people interfere with your artistic expression.

I wish there was a way to set up a poll here. I would like to know if I am a minority or others think this story is really thought provoking rather than merely a wanker.

The brother sister thing was great. I think several guys had some sort of physical contact with their Sister. These stories let our imagination go where many of us did not when we were growing up. Some guys had some sort of sexual run in with their mom., I believe MUCH LESS than the sister contact? Again, ever since Oedipus there has been that weird desire and introducing Mom into this is hot to the guys, but maybe not to the ladies? In any event, getting dad involved would be GROSS! Maybe it was my very disfunctional relationship with my father, but the dad/ daughter thing is really repulsive to me.

But hey, this is the author’s story, not mine. He has done a wonderful job writing both HOT and Thought provoking situations! I applaud him for that and absolutely will not criticize him or his writing because of my messed up thoughts about families.

You can obviously see his work REALLY has me looking at my earlier years in a most analytical manner. Well done, sir. Even if you force me to open a couple closets i prefer closed.

Hoo, boy! You are really good!

But please keep the father out GzuG6D

did the Ex-girlfriend change her name from Kelly to Karen?

Wow. Made me supper horny and hard. Blow my load several times. Great story.

I really like the Brandon, Lauren relationship. Kristina as well is okay but adding the parents destroy's all other relationships. Don't think I will bother with the next chapter. I know it's the authors story but I simply like the pure romance of Brandon and Lauren, doesn't need anything else. Too many others fractures everybody's feelings and muddy's everything for me. Leave the parents to their own thing let the kids go their own way before everyone gets lost.

Was a great story right up to the point you added the parents, then it dropped to an ok story. It went from a loving relationship to kind of a sleazy relationship for Brandon and Lauren. Lauren who starts out wanting her brother then decides to become the family slut and Brandon who seemed decent for the entire first part of the story, being the caring guy who just wants his sister(s) and making sure they were satisfied then talks her into screwing their dad which makes him seem like a dbag and pretty much changed the entire feel of the story. While the first chapter was excellent, I probably wont be reading chapter 3.

The story started out so hot with the lingerie party. Then, adding Kristina into the mix with Lauren and Brandon was OK. However, as soon as you added the “conversation” between Lauren and her mom, you lost me. I filter for brother/sister stories, and too often a storyline is going great, it’s erotic, sensual, and naughty, and then for some reason an author feels compelled to bring the parents into it, and it just ruins it. I’ll never know where things went between Lauren and Brandon, whom I look at as the main characters, with maybe Kristina as an additional plot line to spice things up, because I stopped. I’m done. If I wanted to read parent/kid stories, I’d filter for that. I don’t.

took a good sex story, brother, sister, and teen girls, was hot. then brother and sister sex was hot, everything was good, then just had to ruin it, with the parents and all of a sudden, dad is going to fuck his daughter anytime he wants? WTF? you lost your readers, bud. just another crap story, i know where this is going not even going to waste my time reading the rest i don't want to know.

I agree with the most other readers: chapter one was awesome. Getting Kristina involved - ok and reasonable but then making her to the half sister was for me a downer. Involving the mother is normally for me not a problem, but in your story with the described background: no thanks (I would say unrealistic, but here at literotica...). But including the father ESPECILALLY when Lauren have NO intentions to do so and Brandon nearly pushing her? Sorry, but no ... unfortunatly no more favorite author or story....

WTF, I can see where this story is heading and if I’m right and you include the parents especially the fathers in this story. You just fucked up a great story. It was a ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ story.

When did Kristina go on birth control?

I agree...No parents...Get back to a 4 on 1 orgy with Lauren’s friends...

story keeps getting better, even though its long you never really know because you are so engrossed in the story

Where the first part was great and took the time to go over the details, this second part seems lazy and too eager to move ahead throughout.

Okay, I’m going all Sherlock Holmes here. In my comment on the first chapter, I brought up my concern about a missing partial story. Now I perceive another mystery. This second chapter seems to have a bit of a different feel to it like it may have been written by another author or may be written out of sequence from the first. In the first chapter, Brandon’s ex was Kelly in this second chapter her name has been changed to Karen. I’m a little intrigued here, but I have no way of solving these mysteries.

Both chapters were great reads. But I need to agree with the commenters before me. The concept of making Lauren sleep with her father so that Brandon can sleep with his mom is a complete turn-off for me, especially when Lauren doesn’t want to do it. The mom insisting on this is really nasty in a bad way. She is pimping out her daughter to her husband because she is lusting to sleep with her son? Not good. Not good at all. And Brandon encouraging her to do what her mom wants while she doesn’t want to makes Brandon a real scumbag user in my eyes and not caring at all for his supposedly beloved sister. I would see the dad as a sexual predator if he should agree to his wife’s demand. Kristina now seems out of control for deliberately encouraging Lauren to sleep and actually start an incestuous relationship with her dad. Lauren should not be sacrificed so that Brandon and Mom can munch on each other. No Dads, please.

Where to start... the whole thing felt rushed, the connection with the three central protagonists were sacrafice to drag yet more characters into the sheets. There was at least a passing nod to the natural reluctance on Mom's part to bed her own daughter. The story of her turmoil - like the intimacy between Brandon, Lauren and Kristina - was, frankly, betrayed in favor of short, unengaging sex scenes.

"Of course, I'm new to this but I can't imagine having too many dicks lined up wanting to fuck you." This line is where the romance wax exchanged for pure sex. What happened to Brandon only being with Kristina as a way to substantiate the time with the one he loves? That was the validation for multiple partners. Being with "Mom" is a fantasy, but what does he really get out of it that makes it worth handing Lauren off to another dude (dad or not).

Great story up to here, but if Dad is brought into the loop in Ch 3, I'll read that far and drop the story mid chapter. Sorry to be a downer, but that will have killed the story for me.

I won’t pile on to what most others are saying, but will note one recurring theme I’m not big in … the “ I lined it up and rammed it all the way in one thrust” oft repeated. Not a loving technique and misses the pleasures of slowly overcoming the resistance as the pussy lubes and opens up. Also doesn’t seem to match Brandon’s super lover character.

Just my opinion, your handle (Mr. SLAM) suggests you think differently and, hey, you are doing all the work of writing, so might not be worth the proverbial two cents.

Yeah, like other comments on here, there seems to be something "off" with this chapter. Terms "rushed" and "Lazy" were used to describe this chapter. Those seem fair because of inconsistencies and confusion. For one, is brandon's ex girlfriend's name kelly or karen? ANd, there was an Initial concern to use a condom with kristina and then, all of the sudden, No condom was used with kristina. Plus, there never was one used with Lauren. Other than those head scratchers, it was a decent read. But, then dad was suggested as entering the mix. I am Not against reading about dad/daughter incest but i don't like the way the plot is being suggested for dad/Lauren. That is a turn-off. I will delay my rating for now til i see how chap 3 measures up.

Getting the parents involved is pretty hard core. Not sure how this will go. I think you should have made it just and the siblings and how they will work it out after finding out that Kristina is related. How can they stay together and not get caught. The incest thing is tantalizing but hard to make it work long term. Can you do this or will it all collapse?

Wonderful, so insanely debauched and depraved, absolutely sucking fucking wonderful. Cunt lapping sex maniac Lanc’s UK.

So, what happened between you and Karen?"

LOL!

Did you write the story, or plagiarize it?

Hint; Brandon's ex girlfriend was named Kelly, not Karen.

It's supposed to be YOUR story, you cast remember your character names?

I stopped reading at that point.

Highly disappointing.

For me, history has lost some of its magic.

The problem is not incest at this point, it is the fact that Brandon's relationship with lauren and kristina was special, now it is only about fucking, I am no longer able to feel that love that the three shared.

In the above story, Lauren seemed to accept only Kristina, and Brandon himself acknowledged that just Lauren was enough for him. In this story, he is clearly uncomfortable at first with the idea of ​​fucking his mother, and ends up accepting because his sister insists, and suddenly he doesn't even care that Lauren fucks their father anymore, Lauren goes through as well. a similar process, sudden and seemingly convinced of everything by Kristina, who has gone from an innocent virgin girl to an uncontrolled nympho.

Lauren's first sexual relationship with her mother felt uncomfortable for me too, very forced and sudden. It feels as if they have entered a spiral of manipulating and convincing themselves to fuck different relatives, and when one feels uncomfortable the others try to convince him until suddenly the person feels comfortable with the idea and no longer cares about anything. to happen.

This lengthy review is not a criticism of you, I just needed to let you know how the story felt to me at this point.

You write a fun story, but I agree with some other comments that the story loses “zing” when you expand the action to more characters. The thing about taboo stories is that what’s happening is “wrong” and very very rare. If everyone is doing it, it’s not rare anymore and the taboo nature of it is lost.

Lauren is so hot I just wanted her and Brandon to act like they are married and live happily ever after like a true husband and wife

Why does every great story always wind up being absolutely destroyed by the addition of swapping, cheating, or all characters getting together with everyone in the story? Seriously it happens every damn time I find a decent story. Do you guys f up the story intentionally? It's unbelievably irritating!

Um very good. But I think everyone has forgotten Kristena is not on the pill & Branden hasn't been using a condom lately. Anyway good story so far. Thanks!

It was a good story until you bruaght the dad into it.

You, my good sir, are a master of literature. Anyone to make decent erotic lit. That parentage reveal is on a whole different level of skill on par with Sir Arthur Conan Doyle! Also, all the sex scenes in this series are of of this word.

Love it, so horny and also really enjoying where this is going. Please proceed to the next chapter.

I’m sorry, but you lost me here. I don’t know why these brother and sister stories always seem to devolve in a family free for all. It detracts insanely from the brother sister love story that was developing. I don’t get it. Why would the love for and making love to a sibling leed to “o, well, lets have sex with the parents”?

You are a very talented writer but this story took a wrong turn for me. And not only for me it seems.

I read the comments and I agree with Anon, what happen to the condom as there was no mention of Kristina going on the pill. If she didn't and no condom, she could pregnant really quick. 5 stars

Story was fine until you brought in the parents.

I preferred this without Mum, but it was good nevertheless.

5 more Stars !

Rapier

Ruined it with the parents lost the sexy romance feel.

This was tough to read through what seemed like a change in direction.

It initially felt like a fantasy, and very erotic, with an undercurrent of emotion that would rise to the surface as Brandon and his sister realized they loved each other deeply. Perhaps instead the threesome would become a committed unit, although Christina seemed to be in it a bit more for the sex.

Now it seems to be devolving into how much sex can we have, and how many people can we screw?

Still very good

About to start the next chapter...

I very much enjoyed it, although the parent's certainly bring in a complication that I'm not a fan of. Not a fan of sharing, and I loved the idea of both Lauren and Kristina being all his, even (or especially) because they are siblings.

WOW! Good job; thanks for sharing your work! I read this a few years ago, ran across it again,

What a shit writer. This has great potential and then you fucked up what could have been a sexy, odd romance and devolved it into a lame duck fest. Pathetic.

Not gonna lie it's pretty good but I actually liked where the first book was headed like there'll be multiple girls that have sex with one guy not that this is bad it's just taking such a drastic turn like you decided that you want to change the story so it's good but it's not for me I do hope though that you do create some sort of story that's more like the first book

Next up, the carpet installer, the pizza delivery guy and his 33 year old virgin sister who just left the convent...

Stay tuned!

Nah.

This story fell off quicker than Russia's currency.