The Story of My Telepathic Life Ch. 08

"Sorry, kiddo, I got to go," she said, as she put wrapped that cruel hard thing with cups around her Big Floppy Things.

As Savannah finished getting dressed and turned to go, she stopped, turned around, and kissed me on the forehead. "See you tomorrow... kiddo."

"All right... kiddo."

She made a face and left.

I sensed that something had happened between us, something important, something fundamental.

But I wasn't quite sure what that was.

**********

The next day, while I was waiting for Kenny to arrive with the hover van to load it up with meals for the old people, I found myself talking to Vernon.

"How was your World Government Submission Day, Benny?"

"It was fine, Vernon. Savannah polished my armor."

"She did what?"

"She... she polished me," I said. I sensed I had said something wrong.

Vernon frowned and said, "Benny, how well do you know this girl?"

"I know her name is Savannah. She likes green drinks, and high heels that don't stress her feet, and-"

Vernon waved a hand at me and walked away. I waved back at him. I sensed he was unhappy, but wasn't sure why.

Maybe Vernon would like Savannah to polish his armor. If he wanted, I could ask her.

********

A few days later, Carmine was playing cards with a well dressed man who had fluffy hair. The well dressed man seemed to make Carmine very happy, especially after I told Savannah all the letters and numbers on the cards in the well dressed man's hand. The well dressed man stayed for a while and left. I didn't think much of it, but Savannah did. "Did you see who that was, Benny?"

"Who?" I asked. I had been staring at Savannah's Big Floppy Things. She always wore dresses that showed off different parts of her Big Floppy Things, but never showed the red circles in the middle. I guess she was still sore there. I wonder if she tried using an ointment.

"Robert Stanton," said Savannah.

"Who?"

"He's only one of the richest businessmen in New York City!" she said. "He just came here, lost 30,000 credits, and left!"

"That's a lot of money," I said. "I make three credits an hour at the Help Center. This Robert Stanton must bag a lot of lunches."

I didn't think anything further about it until two men grabbed me the next day and pushed me into a grav car. They took me to a tall building in the center of Manhattan, maybe the tallest. And there I found myself standing in a room with Robert Stanton.

"Hello, Benny," he said.

"Hello," I said.

Robert Stanton told me he had a special friend at the casino who told me that I could do very special things. I told Robert Stanton that Vernon My Main Man told me that I could bag more sandwiches in an hour than anyone he knew. But that's not what he meant. He said I could see into people's minds what they were thinking. By now I realized that's what Savannah meant when I talked about the voices I heard inside of people so I told Robert Stanton that I told Savannah the numbers and letters on everyone's cards and also that I really had to go because I was really going to be late for my work at the casino.

Robert Stanton shook his head. "You don't have a job at the casino any more, Benny."

"Why? I was making five credits an hour! And they gave me an electric candle, and Savannah polished my armor!"

One of Stanton's men who drove me there laughed.

"I have a much better paying job for you, Benny. Name your price."

That really stumped me. No one had ever asked me to name a price before. I was just offered a job, and I accepted. How much should I ask for? I got three credits an hour at the Help Center, and Carlo paid me five credits an hour (plus an electric candle, and Savannah polishing my armor, though I wasn't sure exactly how much to value that, monetarily speaking) so maybe I should ask for....

"Six credits an hour?" I said hopefully.

Robert Stanton laughed. "Tell me what I'm thinking, Benny."

I did, and my jaw dropped open.

"What am I thinking, Benny?"

"You... you want to give me 600 credits an hour?" I said.

"Yes, Benny."

"What can I do that's worth that sort of thing?"

"Not much. Not very much at all. Simply go to some parties with me and tell me what people are thinking."

I frowned.

"What's wrong?"

"I like doing jobs that make people happy. I deliver food for the Help Center and it makes people very happy. I read the letters and numbers to Savannah and it made her so happy that she polished my armor."

"Well, by doing this little task for me you'll make me very happy, Benny. And maybe, just maybe, we can find someone to polish your armor."

Robert Stanton smiled at me in a very friendly way, and that was good enough for me!

********

And then I met Linda. Linda was a little like Savannah. She had yellow hair, but her hair wasn't so big and wild like Savannah's. She also didn't show off her Big Floppy Things, which were hidden under layers of clothing. She was wearing kind of a lady's version of a suit, like Robert Stanton.

Linda took me shopping for a suit of my own. I told her I already had a suit. In fact I was wearing it when they took me. That suit is ass, the little voice inside of Linda said. Did my suit really show off my behind?

As we shopped in the store and the salesman selected something for me, I said, "Are you going to be my new Savannah?"

Linda's eyes narrowed. "What do you mean by that, Benny?"

"Well... Savannah took me shopping for clothes too. And she had yellow hair. And we had drinks together, and talked about numbers."

"We may have drinks together and talk about numbers too, Benny."

"Does that mean you'll also polish my armor?"

"Did Savannah do that for you, Benny?"

"Uh huh. Then I asked her to watch Rustabunny with me but she didn't. Are you going to do that, Linda? Will you polish my armor and watch Rustabunny with me?"

"We'll see, Benny. Linda gave me an odd look, the kind of look girls sometimes gave me when they want me to go away. But Linda didn't go away. In fact she paid for the suit and then took me in tow for what she had planned for next.

********

It was a party, I was told. A special kind of party for businessmen.

Was one of them having a birthday? I asked. "Vernon My Main Man got me a cake for my 25th birthday. It was shaped like a Rustabunny because Vernon knew-"

"No, not that kind of party, Benny. It's going to be a party where people talk about business things."

"Oh." My face fell. "I don't know anything about that."

"You don't need to. All you need to do is to watch whoever Robert talks to, and listen to whatever the man is thinking... the voice inside, as you call it."

"All right," I said. I felt a bit uneasy. Work at the Happy Fun Entertainment Center seemed much more well defined. I was simply reading numbers. I wished they could give me something easier to do, like bagging lunches.

Robert Stanton smiled as he walked over to me and Linda. "Benny, you look fantastic in your new suit!"

"Thank you," I said. He had just said something nice to me. Vernon My Main Man told me that when someone paid me a compliment, I should return the favor. "You look fantastic in your suit too."

"Thank you," said Stanton, giving me an easy grin. "Linda, did you go over with Benny what's expected of him?"

"Yes," said Linda, staring at me. "He knows you're going to be talking to people, and when you talk to them, he has to listen to and remember their thoughts."

"Let's be even more specific, Benny," said Stanton. "We're going to be talking to Randall Tran, the CEO of Asstech. Asstech is going to be releasing an earnings report next week. If it's good, the stock will go up; if it's bad the stock will go down. I want to know what those earnings are now. Do you understand?"

"No."

Stanton sighed. "I'm going to talk to him, and try to get him to think of a number. You'll have to tell me what number he's thinking of."

"Oh, I did that before for Carlo!" I said. "I can do that!"

"Good. Let's see what develops."

********

Randall Tran was a short, thin Asian man who wore a dark suit and a dark tie. He reminded me of the Chinese Rustabunny, who had slanted eyes and ate with chopsticks. Mr. Stanton introduced me and Linda. "Robert, you know Linda, my chief strategist."

"Of course," said Tran. He kissed Linda on the cheek, which startled me. I wondered if that mean that she would be polishing his armor later.

"And this is Benny Johnson, my newest analyst."

"Benny." Tran smiled as he shook my hand. "Nice to meet you. What is your area?"

What is my area? Linda never told me I would have to answer questions! "I deliver lunches on the Upper East Side."

"Haha, Benny is such a joker," said Stanton. "He's one of our finest tech analysts."

"Really? What is your speciality, Benny?"

I frowned. He was speaking words but I didn't understand what he was saying. It was like he was speaking a different language. Maybe this was the Asian language? "Vernon says I'm special."

"Vernon?"

"My Main Man," I explained.

"Benny is a savant, Randall. Brilliant, but focused. Extremely focused," said Stanton. "A genius with numbers, actually. And on the subject of numbers, Randall, any clue on what your earning report is going to contain next week?"

"I wish I could tell you, Rob. But then I'd have to kill you."

"Don't hurt him!" I cried.

"It was just a joke, Benny," said Linda.

The voice inside of Randall Tran said. This Benny is very odd. Why does Robert keep him around?

"I'm good with numbers," I said.

"What?"

"I'm good with numbers," I said. "That's why he keeps me around."

Stanton said, "On the subject of numbers, most analysts say that your earnings will come in at 28 to 29 billion. So what will it be, Randall? 28, 29, 30... 31... or even 32 or 33?"

"You know I can't tell you that, Rob," said Randall.

"32!" I yelled.

"What?" said Randall.

"Benny does computations in his head. It keeps him occupied," said Linda. "He has the mind of a supercomputer. Come along, Benny."

"A supercomputer." I liked that! "I have a mind of a supercomputer." I wondered what a supercomputer was--perhaps a computer that was really, really super? As Linda led me away, I heard Randall's little voice saying, how did he guess it was 32 billion?

********

"Benny, are you sure that Randall thought the number 32?"

"Well, the little voice inside of him-"

"Yes, Benny, the little voice. Was it clearly saying 32 billion?"

"Yes," I said.

Linda looked at Stanton.

"The stock is going to go through the roof."

********

This was a very easy job! They didn't even need me every evening like Carlo did at the Happy Fun Entertainment Center. I might have gone back there, to see if Carlo needed more numbers and letters to be counted, and to see if Savannah was there and possibly interested in polishing my armor again, but Linda had told me that they didn't want me working there anymore.

But Linda did take me back to Mr. Stanton's office next week. They were holding a little party in his office. Everyone was quite happy.

"Do you know how much money you made me, Benny? Do you?" he asked, with a big smile.

I tried to guess. The voice inside of him was unavailing. I figured it must be a lot. If I was being paid 600 credits an hour, it must be at least... "601 credits?"

"601 credits? 601 credits?" Stanton gave a laugh. "Let's have a toast for our mathematical genius!" Everyone raised wine glasses and clinked them together.

Linda asked me if I'd like some wine. I told her that Vernon My Main Man said that dependable men like me didn't drink wine but I would like some grape or apple juice if they had some. They did, and soon I was sipping with the best of them, and feeling very grand.

Just a few short weeks ago I was a simple food delivery boy (and actually, during the day, I still was). But now I was so much more. I was drinking apple juice out of fancy wine glasses with fancily dressed people on a high floor of a very shiny building!

Linda smiled and actually winked at me. I wonder if she would be polishing my armor any time soon. I had only had a woman polish my armor once, but I had quickly become addicted to it.

*********

My Main Man Vernon noticed my gold belt. Linda bought it for me after I told her I wanted a gold belt exactly like the one the Silver Rustabunny wore. Yes, that's right, it was the Silver Rustabunny which wore the gold belt. There is a popular misconception that the Gold Rustabunny wore the gold belt but that is ridiculous because if the Gold Rustabunny wore a gold belt you'd never see it. That's why the Silver Rustabunny wears gold. The belt Linda bought for me was not exactly like the Silver Rustabunny's gold belt but it was very nice. Linda said it was expensive. I asked if it cost more than 600 credits, and she said it was much, much more than that.

"601 credits?" I asked. She laughed and kissed me on the cheek. I think she was definitely getting ready to polish my armor. I realized that even though I couldn't really see her Big Floppy Things that she was quite pretty in her own way, in a way Savannah wasn't but not in a way I could put into words. Linda had every hair on her head neatly arranged and she wore fancy striped suits and I could much more easily imagine her polishing the armor of another man in a fancy business suit than polishing the armor of a man at the Happy Fun Entertainment Center.

I told my Main Man that Linda bought the belt for me and that started a whole new conversation where I explained my new job.

"And what are they asking you to do for this gold belt, Benny?"

I explained I was telling them numbers that other people were talking about with their little voices.

"With their little voices, eh?" said Vernon. "Benny, what you're doing is wrong."

"What's wrong with it?" I asked.

"You're telling people things, private things they shouldn't be knowing."

"But if they wanted these things to be private, why do they talk about them in their little voices?"

Vernon sighed. "Benny, your Aunt Clara asked me to look after you before she Went Away. I'm doing the best I can. Trust me on this, you shouldn't be doing this."

I bit my lip. Linda and Robert Stanton had been so nice to me. They were paying me 600 credits an hour and they had bought me a suit and a belt made of solid gold and had given me apple juice in a very fancy wine glass. But Aunt Clara said I should listen to Vernon My Main Man after she Went Away and so I guess I would have to stop working for them. And I never even got to find out if Linda would polish my armor!

And so it was with a heavy heart that I told Linda that I couldn't work for them anymore. She had called to invite me to another party, an important party, which was being held three days later. I told her I couldn't go, and asked if she wanted the gold belt back.

"No, Benny. What changed your mind?"

I explained that Vernon My Main Man told me that what I was doing was wrong and I shouldn't go.

Linda said that she respected that but to think about it and if I changed my mind to let her know. I promised her I would but I had a sinking feeling that Linda would never polish my armor now.

The next day Vernon My Main Man was not in at work. I was surprised; Vernon never missed a day. Mr. Anderson always said that Vernon worked harder than a sober Jamaican. The next day, however, Vernon did come to work, and his arm was bandaged and he had bruises around his left eye. I asked him what had happened.

He told me that he had tripped and fell. I knew immediately that this was not true because Vernon's little voice was telling me that men had come and hurt Vernon. They had punched and kicked him in a very bad way.

And then Vernon told me that he was wrong to tell me not to work for Linda and Robert Stanton, and if I still wanted to, that I should.

"Are you sure, Vernon?"

He nodded, wincing slightly. "I'm sure."

I considered everything that I had seen and heard. Vernon My Main Man had obviously been beaten badly. Somehow the beating had changed his mind about whether I should be working for Robert Stanton. I hypothesized that the pain of being beaten had helped Vernon realize the mistake he had made. Aunt Clara once said to me that pain was a great teacher and it looked like Vernon had learned a whole lot.

So I called Linda and told her I could work for Mr. Stanton again... and could I still keep the gold belt?

She assured me that I could.

********

The thing they wanted me to do at this party was tougher. Much tougher. I think getting beaten up like Vernon would have been easier. I almost asked if they could do that to me instead.

Linda and Mr. Stanton didn't just want me to tell them a number. They wanted me to tell them a thing. They were going to talk to a woman named Pramilla Jamilla and they wanted to find out what she was working on. What she was working on would be a thing, not a number. I knew what things were--Rustabunny was a thing. My gold belt was a thing. Vernon My Main Man's drug pipe was a thing. But how did I know which thing that Pramilla Jamilla would be thinking of would be important?

Linda squeezed my hand and assured me I would do well. But her inner voice wasn't so sure. We shouldn't have gotten a simple boy involved. He's sweet, and I worry that he'll get hurt.

I was so very pleased. Linda thought I was sweet! I really was beginning to think that she was going to polish my armor. She didn't have Big Floppy Things like Savannah did, at least, not as big, but I imagined they would look reasonably nice. If Linda had the same red round sores on the tip, perhaps I could rub ointment in them for her.

We met Pramilla Jamilla. She was dark skinned like Vernon My Main Man but not dark skinned in a way that mattered. Vernon My Main Man told me that being dark skinned was good but being black was more important. I don't think Pramilla Jamilla was black because she looked more like Mrs. Jasmati the cleaning lady. Mrs. Jasmati wore a sheet that covered her head and her body. Vernon My Main Man said that was because she didn't want men to ask her to polish their armor. I didn't understand this. Why wouldn't men want her to polish her armor all because of a sheet-

"-and this is Benny Johnson, my newest analyst".

"Hello Benny," said Pramilla Jamilla.

I didn't say anything. Linda had told me that this time I wasn't to speak.

Linda kicked my foot. "Benny, say hello."

"You told me not to say anything!" I said.

"Hahaha, Benny's a real joker," said Stanton. "Listen, Pram old girl. Everyone is dying to know what your company is working on."

"You'll find out when everyone else does, when the announcement comes out next week," said Jamilla.

They engaged in a long and confusing conversation about things I didn't even understand. Linda saw the confusion on my face and she clearly felt sorry for me as she squeezed my hand. He really shouldn't be here. We never should have got him involved with this.

That only made me want to try harder. Pramilla's mind was a jumble of things... of the rice she was having for dinner... of beating her wife because she talked back to her... of her new ladyfriend sitting in a fancy car she had bought her... and something about an elevator of some kind.... Which one of these things could be the one that Linda and Stanton were looking for?

After they finished talking, Linda took me to an empty room. "All right, Benny, what was the thing?"

I shrugged, just as Stanton came in. "Did he get it?"

"I'm not sure," said Linda. He doesn't know.

I felt so sad for Linda that I just knew I had to try harder. "Her little voice was talking about a lot of things." I said, hoping one was what they were looking for. "Eating rice... hitting her wife in the face.... a new car she bought for a woman... riding an elevator...."