The Sultanah Ch. 12

"We have not been told to expect foreigners," a high voice said, I was surprised to find, in the common tongue (though heavily accented), "You are now prisoners of the Mürebbiye of Anaerki."

"We accept the situation for what it is and we will not resist. We meant no disrespect," I said, trying to sound calm. I could still feel the person at my side staring at me, "We only sought an audience with the Mürebbiye." I noticed that the warriors seemed to relax. I knew they must've been following us for some time, wondering about our intentions. They had waited until they got us in a vulnerable position and then materialized out of the trees. I was not surprised to find we outnumbered them greatly.

"Well, we will be taking you to the Mürebbiye's official residence. If the Mürebbiye decides to grant an audience, there are few places more convenient," the warrior responded. Then, both warriors turned, whistled, and started to walk forward. The warriors poured out of the woods and began to intersperse in our lines, clutching their weapons tightly. Another, large group came up behind our soldiers, capping the end of our line. We started marching together, everyone quiet in the rain. Everyone, that is, except Kardes.

"This is your fault," she hissed at me as we began to move. I did not respond. In fact, I didn't know how to respond. Her hostility seemed to grow during the trip and now she was 'blaming' me for doing exactly what we wanted: finding someone to taking us to the Mürebbiye.

Perhaps I was anxious about the meeting but I did not want to think about it. That is actually quite likely. But instead of focusing on the unknown (namely what would happen to us now that we were prisoners), I focused my anger and my anxiety on my sister. And, as our guides led us through the forest and through small, seemingly abandoned mountain villages, I stewed. This situation was tough enough as it was, I did not need members of my Inner Council, my sister for Gunes sake, second guessing me and growing angry with me.

We were not as close as I had expected to the Mürebbiye's residence. I don't know why I had believed that we would reach the conclusion of our mission in the center of the Anaerki. Regardless, it had been a mistake. The warriors walked us up and down the mountains, never pausing or flagged. My men, still hungry, were essentially jogging to keep up with the pace. The whole while, we moved higher and higher in the mountains and the air grew thinner. Evening was beginning to come on and I wondered if they were going to make us walk all night or if we would sleep in the elements. I considered asking one of the warriors, perhaps the one who had spoken to me earlier. But they all remained totally silent, not even their armor clinking as they walked. They moved more like specters than humans. The feeling made me uneasy and kept my mouth closed. And kept my mind stewing silently on my problems.

By the time we reached the Mürebbiye's residence, I was enraged with Kardes; if anything, the discomfort and the problems on this trip were her fault. I was so upset that I barely noticed the majesty of the Mürebbiye's compound. Calling it a castle would be giving it too much credit. It was a circular palisade wall surrounding a small village consisting mostly of hovels. There was a large residence in the very center of the building, a two story wooden structure with a slate, rather than thatched, roof.

While this hardly sounds majestic, it was the location of the residence that gave it some splendor. The palisades encapsulated a small, hanging valley near the highest part of the mountain range. From the village, it was possible to see out over the green-topped mountains stretching off in every direction. I could see a massive river at the bottom of the mountain, in a narrow valley. I knew from my maps that this was the source of the Kuzey River, wich eventually led to Şehir. The rain had stopped shortly before we arrived and the sky was a pure, cloudless blue just beginning to grow dark in the far east and I could see rainbows in the distance. In short, it was a breathtaking place. Beautiful enough to allow me to forget about my sister for a moment.

Once in the center of the village we saw several women and warriors walking around. They purposefully took no notice of us, though I caught a few glancing at us out of the corners of their eyes. Once we were all within the palisade, the warriors closed the door behind us. The warriors fanned out along the perimeter of the palisade, turning their weapons towards us. The women moved into their homes, recognizing that the village was now a prison. They did not seem particularly concerned, more that they were trying to stay out of the way than that they feared trouble. The warrior who had first taken us prisoner indicated to me (and to my chagrin Kardes) that we should enter the Mürebbiye's residence and wait on our audience. I looked at my soldiers, anxious and silent and nodded to them encouragingly. I, of course, was slightly nervous now (despite the details of my plan) but I tried to convey calm. I was not sure if it worked, but nonetheless I turned from them. Kardes and I entered the residence and were led quickly to the reception hall. There we waited for the Mürebbiye and eventually we began to fight.

"This is neither the time nor the place to discuss this," Kardes said in response to my attempts to get her to explain the nature of her complaint. She scooted away from me on the bench we were seated upon.

"All we have is time. Who knows when the Mürebbiye will see us?" I responded sharply.

"Please think about what you are doing! You are picking a fight in the middle of a diplomatic mission. Think of how this looks!" Kardes whispered back.

"This is a fight you chose to have. You are angry at me for some reason and you won't say why," I shot back.

"Please just stop it now, control yourself," Kardes pled.

"You have the power to stop this, just tell me why you are upset so that I can understand it," I replied, feeling heated. I saw a few warrior heads turn towards us.

"Varis, please..." Kardes said, her eyes growing wide and her voice starting to shake. She was getting angry now. She no longer bothered whispering.

"Just tell me," I interrupted. Kardes' lips pursed and her face was red. She was shaking with anger now.

"You want to know Varis? You want to know why I am upset with you?"

"That is what I have been saying all along!" I responded, exasperated.

"Why Nislani?" She said and I saw tears welling in her eyes. I barely understood the meaning of her words. Nislani? What did she have to do with this, "You decided you had to marry your sister. There were only two present. There was a spoiled brat who hated you and always tried to ruin everything in your life. And then there was your older sister, who was loyal to you, who gave you guidance before anyone else, who stood by your side when the world was trying to crash down around you. And what? You chose the brat! Is it because she is younger and prettier than me? Fine, I guess if that is important. But you didn't even discuss it with me. You just went and did it without even asking my opinion. And then, to make matters worse, you make me preside over it! You make me watch while you and Nislani consummate your marriage. And now you aren't getting along with her. Ha! I could've told you that was going to happen. But you didn't ask."

I sputtered, completely thrown off balance by this sudden harangue. Whatever I had thought was the problem, it certainly wasn't this. I tried to say something, anything. Feebly, I noted, "You were the one who told me to be nice to her..."

"I told you to ignore her because her petty concerns because they were beneath you. I didn't tell you marry and then fuck her!" Kardes responded. I was simply growing more confused. I felt like my body and mind were moving through molasses. What was Kardes saying? What did she want?

"So... you wanted...me to marry you instead of Nislani?" I couldn't believe she meant that.

"I wanted you to think of me first! I have been loyal to you since the beginning. I know how politics works and I would be an asset. I was in the room when you came up with your brilliant little marriage idea, but you didn't even think of me. It was Nislani from the first instant. This is what I always get for the work I do for people..." she trailed off.

"You know what Nislani and I had to do...have to keep doing. You saw it. You wanted that with me?" I asked, still not sure she was fully understanding what she was asking for.

"There was a time when I would've done anything for you Varis. I believed in you as Sultanah. I loved you and would make any sacrifice to make sure that you succeeded."

"Loved?" I asked, noting the past tense and feeling a coldness in the pit of my stomach.

"You may enter now," A voice said, causing me to jump. Kardes had not had a chance to respond and now she turned, her eyes welling with tears, towards the door of the throne room. A guard was present, beckoning us inside.

"Go Varis. You didn't need me in this decision either, so go do what you want," she said, no longer bothering to whisper. I rose mechanically and started towards the door. The guards were looking at us and I wondered how much they understood about what was going on. Maybe more than I did. I felt dizzy and my stomach was knotted up as I walked through the door. I heard Kardes walking behind me, moving lighter, like she was glad to have her troubles off her chest.

I barely remembered why I was entering the room. My mind was now completely consumed with thoughts of Kardes. I tried to remember everything that had happened in the run up to my marriage. It was true, I had never thought of Kardes. I was listening to Nislani complain and then it struck me that there was a solution to both of our problems. Was it just age? Kardes was 38 and it was less likely that she would produce an heir than Nislani. Besides, as a widow there was no actual need for her to be married. She was not like Nislani, who needed to be wed for the sake of appearances. Speaking of appearance, that was certainly not it. Kardes was older than Nislani, but she was still an attractive woman. And I hardly chose Nislani because of sexual attraction. It had been a necessity.

While I felt my reasons were quite clear, I had to admit to myself that these were more rationalizations than anything else. I had never even thought of Kardes. She already had a place in my life, as one of my trusted advisors. Nislani, on the other hand, had been a hanging problem. My only thought had been neutralizing her. Kardes had not even really figured into the equation.

But now that I thought of it, it became clear that Kardes had felt, at the very least, uncomfortable about the situation. When I had first made my announcement, Cin had been demonstrably in favor of the marriage. But I did not recall Kardes saying anything. Kardes did not, as usual, take command of the planning of the social aspects of the wedding, allowing Cin to do everything. Further, when she presided over the consummation, she had seemed intensely uncomfortable. I had just assumed she was uncomfortable because I was and Nislani was, but it was now clear that there was more to it than that.

While I now understood that Kardes was upset, I still could not honestly figure out why. She seemed to blow off the implication that she was attracted to me. Then was marriage to me a reward for her loyalty? I truly respect Kardes and loved her deeply; I would have done anything to prove my appreciation for her steadfastness and her support. She had become a pillar in my life in such a short period of time, filling any gaps I'd lost when the men in my family were killed. Doing more than that in fact. I just never dreamed that becoming my consort was the sort of reward she would have wanted. In fact, I had never thought about any reward for Kardes or anyone else. I gave things to people like Kukla and Nislani, those I needed to convince. I always assumed my success and the success of the Empire was reward for Kardes. I had been wrong.

And the more I thought about it, the more sense it made. Not, so much, that Kardes wanted to marry me. But what it was she believed the marriage would represent. I remembered Kardes story about her marriage to a man far distant from power. Her attempts to manipulate the situation to gain a seat at the table. The miserable failure of that attempt with the death of her husband. I thought about her knowledge of the court and the personalities at play there. Kardes was an important part of my success and she wanted a role that reflected her contribution, something that made her exercise of power legitimate. The story of Kardes life was a story of thwarted ambition, the role of most intelligent women in the Empire. Kukla was a similar story, a similar illustration. And when I had one place for a woman to gain some modicum of power, I had given to Nislani. I had never realized that, because I had neglected to think about it.

As I made my way into the Mürebbiye gloomy throne room, I was overcome with shame. I barely noticed the dirt floor, the roughhewn benches, the thatch roof. I was thinking of Kardes. Now all of her anger made sense. It even explained Cin's initial refusal to support the plan and the subsequent change of heart. She had understood what I didn't, that as important as it was for me to forge my new connections, it was equally important that I cultivate the loyalty of those dedicated to me already.

But, in truth, all of these thoughts were more of a jumbled set of impulses than the fully formed ideas laid out above. I instinctively knew all this to be the case, but I couldn't have put it so succinctly. And there was no time either. Because within a few minutes, Kardes and I had been led through the throne room, out a back door, and into the Mürebbiye's private chambers. Regardless of the importance I now placed on Kardes concerns, I had to focus now on the purpose of my visit.

In a daze, I came to terms with my surroundings. I was in a small room, around the size of the largest privy in my own palace. There were windows on one side of the room and they let a thin, pale white stream of lights into the dark room. It was dark because the walls were made entirely of some sort blackish wood. It was sparsely furnished, simply a bed, a chair, and a desk scattered with papers. One guard followed us into the room, closing the door afterward. There was only one person in the room. The Mürebbiye was seat at the desk, leaning over several papers. Unlike all of the other warriors we saw, the Mürebbiye was not wearing any armor. In fact, she was wearing very little at all.

The Mürebbiye of Anaerki, as all leaders of the Republic since its founding centuries earlier, was a woman. Those rumors, at least, had been true. Cin had told me as much during my briefing before I left. The Empire had always been unnerved by this fact, but the warriors of Anaerki were so potent, that the Sultans ignored the unorthodox nature of their government. I had been expecting as much when I arrived. What I was not expecting, however, was for the Mürebbiye to be such an attractive woman.

She was younger than I expected, mid to late thirties I believed, but in prime physical shape due to her status as a warrior-leader. A Mürebbiye, if successful, was elected for life. But she could be impeached if she was unsuccessful for battle. This particular Mürebbiye looked as though she would never lose a fight in her life. She was wearing only a loose skirt tied around her waist and a black, brassiere-like top that left little the imagination. As a result, I received an unimpeded view of her body.

She was quite tall, around 5'9 and had a trim, powerful build. She had slender legs with smooth, golden-brown skin with sleek muscles just below the surface. She had a muscular bottom and somewhat wide hips, especially given her height. Her stomach was flat and toned (though not overly muscled in any sort of masculine way). Her breasts were small and high on her chest, though they looked larger crammed into her small top. Her arms looked powerful without being overly muscular and she had a long, elegant neck. Her face was fiercely beautiful with a pointed chin, full lips, small nose, and large round eyes that were dark and intelligent. She had long reddish-brown hair that was tied behind her back in a long, tightly braided ponytail. In short, she looked like a beautiful athlete with skin tanned evenly from the sun and body toned expertly by daily practice.

She let us stand awkwardly for inside of the room for several minutes while she pored over documents on her desk. I did my best to maintain my Imperial dignity, looking off into the distance and ignoring the fact that she ignored me. I had plenty to think about, my sister's concerns still fresh in my mind. But, after a time, the Mürebbiye spoke without looking up.

"Why are you trespassing in Anaerki?" she asked, her voice sounding annoyed even though it was almost as thickly accented as the warrior we had first encountered. The sound of her voice focused my attention on the matter at hand and my concerns about my sister shifted into the back of my mind. I had to answer this question. Without an adequate explanation of my arrest, I decided to change the subject.

"Greetings Mürebbiye, I am Sultanah Varis I of Bütün Dünya, I have arrived on a diplomatic mission from Şehir..." I was going to speak further, but the Mürebbiye interrupted me.

"Why is the Sultan sending his wife on diplomatic missions? Does he think that will impress me? What does Tanri think of allowing women to work in politics?" the Mürebbiye spat. It seemed that she was at least as ignorant of the Empire as I was of Anaerki. I decided to disabuse her of her misunderstandings gently.

"There is no Sultan in Şehir. And there is no Tanri either. There is only me. And Gunes," I said solemnly. Finally, this seemed to get the Mürebbiye's attention and she quickly turned from her papers, looking me over now with increased interest. I was now able to see her more clearly and was stunned by her youthful beauty.

"The heresy has passed? And a woman sits on the throne in Ülke? There are new things under the sun after all," she said, sounding amused. She stood now, her statuesque body rising to full height. I decided to follow the strand of her words, trying to lay the charm on somewhat thickly.

"We have had great reason and ample opportunity to consider the mistakes of the Empire's recent past," I explained, "In a way, it is why I am here." I tried to sound as humble as possible and I bowed slightly as I spoke. I was really playing down my dignity as the Sultanah and I hoped that the Mürebbiye appreciated it.

"In that case, you are at least welcome to my quarters. We do not stand on ceremony in Anaerki, please excuse my informality." Her tone was much more inviting now. She walked gracefully around the bed and then stopped and sat down on the edge, facing us.

"Thank you," I responded, "It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance Mürebbiye..."

"Please, my first name, Maderşahi, will be fine" she insisted, "As I said, we are informal here." I nodded, unwilling to grant equal access to her. I was going to humble myself, not give away everything.

"Well Maderşahi," I said, the strange name catching slightly on my tongue, "I wish to apologize on behalf of the Empire for our previous behavior. As you noted, we were in the grips of heresy. We followed a false God that taught of the inherent subservience of women. Whatever offense our actions cause, I hope that we can put them behind us." Maderşahi looked at me quizzically. She glanced over my shoulder at the guard and then shrugged.

"Everyone makes mistakes. Clearly your ascension indicates that the Empire has recognized its past misogyny and has put it aside. I see no reason to hold a grudge. The apology is accepted," Maderşahi said and I felt shocked. Diplomatically apologies, even one offered as freely and easily as mine, were not generally just 'accepted' like a private affair. This was an opportunity for negotiation, an opening into a talk on more weighty issues. Maderşahi had simply shoved all that aside. She had not been lying about her informality. But it left me sputtering. Where was I to go from here?