The Sunshine Project Pt. 11

Now is when I place my life on the line for you, Allie Bug. You are my everything now, and I am going to make this right. Jess will go down for her part in this, and you'll be free to be with me forever.

"So my girlfriend invited me over. I met this psycho chick named Jess. She's a real piece of work. Anyway, my girlfriend went missing, so I staked out her house. She was sick from work all week, ghosting my messages and calls." I take a deep breath trying to stay calm while I remember how Jess kept her locked up for a week away from me. Jess probably knew the whole time how that gun worked to reverse the shrinking and just never told Allie. "When Jess rocked up to my girlfriend's house I went to confront her, and there my girl was in Jess's handbag. Literally, the size of a toy doll."

I see something flash in his eyes, his expression shifting. His brow furrows, nose scrunching a little. His chin lifts and he says, "Continue..."

This doesn't seem like the right reaction. He should be angry or secretive, right? Maybe I should stop talking now. Maybe I've said too much. Allie can't be taken away from me. I should have left out the part where I said she was tiny, but now it's too late. He's staring at me and I'm internally panicking now.

"So..." I clear my throat. "Of course I freaked out. I passed out, and they brought me to Jess's house. When I came around they were standing over me. I panicked some more and eventually I just shot her with the gun again."

"What did it look like?" His hand grips his steering wheel, knuckles going white.

"Uh, it looked like a miniature version of her. Like, she was exactly the same in her tiny form as she is in her normal form." I don't understand the question. She was shrunken not mutated.

"No, the gun. What did the gun look like?"

Yeah... okay. He's not interested in the person; he wants the gun. That's completely understandable. He just wants his technology back so it doesn't fall into the wrong hands. This is good. It means he won't haul Allie in for experimentation. It's good, Allie Bug. We'll be together soon.

"Uh... It was heavy, a little larger than a normal gun, silver. It had a color on the handle, but I don't remember what color. There were a few of them, all different colors." Fuck, I wish I could remember the colors.

He sits there as if deep in thought for a moment before asking, "Do you have any proof? Any pictures or videos? Can anyone corroborate your story?"

I lean my head against the headrest and almost groan audibly. Kirk said this, that I need proof or evidence of some kind, but exactly how am I supposed to get that? I looked for the guns when I was there, but Jess had them locked up and then that whole mess with the threesome came up. I didn't even want Allie to tell Jess we were leaving; it would've been better that way, but she insisted. Then she went right back over there the next morning. I never got a chance to scope the place out.

Fucking hell, Jess. You have a hold on her, some spell you've cast that makes her believe every fucking thing you say, and I've had enough of that. I need to get back into your house and get proof.

"I don't." I lick my lips and know the conversation here is over.

"Well, you need to get it. Get one of the guns, or take a picture or video of them using it. If you can prove to me they have it, I can launch an investigation. In the meantime, I will begin paperwork on my end to push something through. It won't be easy. What you're talking about is highly classified military shit." He rubs his chin and shakes his head. "We need to find out how they got their hands on these weapons. Fuck, I never knew any existed--and now I've said too much."

"What?" Nothing is making sense now. Obviously these guns are some military experiment shit, but if no one knew they existed then how do they exist?

"I've said too much. Certain topics are just off limits. I can listen to what you have to say but I cannot share anything. Now, if you want my help, bring me proof. I'll never be able to read you in, but at least we can remove any danger to you or your friends." Johnson reaches down and starts his car. "You have my number now. Call me when you have what I need."

Without a word, I climb out of his car and walk back to mine, heels clicking once again. It was a less than fruitful meeting, but I know what I need to do now. The proof I need can only be gotten by going back to that bitch's house and using the weapon or taking it. Never in a million years did I think I'd be in a situation like this. I feel like I'm living in some dystopian thriller novel or something, and that thought plagues me the whole drive home.

When I get there, Kirk's truck is parked out front but he's not in it. Asshole probably snuck into my place while I was out. He's good like that, making a master key because he can and just making himself at home. And I'm right; the second I walk in I see him sitting on my sofa in nothing but his boxers. The TV is on, and he's munching on my bag of potato chips. "How'd it go?" he asks, leaving crumbs on the white leather.

"Goddammit, Kirk." I drop my purse by the door and lock it, then walk straight to the closet and pull out my Dustbuster. He has no clue how much it annoys me to have crumbs everywhere, which is reason numero uno that I never want to live with someone. "Do you have to be such a slob? And why are you in my apartment? Should I call your wife?" I use the handheld vacuum to suck up the bits of chips scattered around him and on his lap. He snickers as it brushes across his dick, then grabs me by the waist and pulls me down onto his lap. I shut the Dustbuster off and toss it onto the cushion.

"You're hot when you're bitchy."

"Fuck's sake, let me go." I don't try to get up because he's bigger than me and there is no point in fighting him. But I do offer a deep scowl.

"How did it go?" he asks again, and I'm compelled to answer. He was nice enough to have gotten me that meet even though it was the same thing he already told me. I wish I could have gone into the meeting with proof and because I didn't it was pretty anticlimactic.

"He just said the same thing you did. I need proof. I just have to get it."

"Mmmm... I want to get it," he says, pulling down on my hips as he grinds upward with his.

"Funny."

"Beck, fuck me." He kisses my arm just below the hem of my sleeve. Last time we fucked it wasn't so bad. He got me off really good, and I remembered what I like about heteronormative sex. But Allie is the one who gets me going now. Would you hate me if I fucked him, Allie Bug?

"What's wrong? Wifey won't give you anal anymore?" I snicker and pry his hands off of me, then stand. He doesn't seem to take kindly to me walking away. He stands and follows me into my bedroom after I snag my purse.

"Nah, she's just boring. Wants vanilla shit and you're... Well, you like to experiment." He stands in the doorway as I kick off my shoes and pluck the clip-on earrings from my ears. I watch his reflection in the mirror as I pull my blouse over my head, then tug my jeans off. The black bra and panties I'm wearing don't exactly scream "fuck me," but he grabs his dick through his boxers and stares as I take a makeup wipe and wash my face.

"Isn't that part of marriage? Settling for boring sex the rest of your life so you can have a kids and a career that's steady?" Another reason I never settled. Who the fuck wants to fuck the same person every day the rest of their life? I mean, I'd do it if it was Allie, but she's a bit more exciting than that. We'd have tons of fun experimenting.

Kirk walks into my room and the closer he gets to me the more clearly I see his cock swelling. "Beck, you know me. You know what I like. Why can't we just do now what we used to do?"

"Because I'm involved with someone." I wipe my face vigorously, trying to wash the arousal off of it. I'm turned on by the idea that he could fuck me while I think of Allie, like he did last time. It was sort of hot.

"Hm, so that was the person you were talking to while you fucked me last time?" He grabs my hips and pulls me backward. His hard; his dick rubs against my ass cheek and I roll my eyes at him. "You can think of him again, you know, while I fuck you. I don't mind."

"You mean her. And what makes you think I want to fuck you anyway? What if I want to call your wife and let her know what a fucking cunt you are?" I turn to face him, dropping my makeup wipe on my vanity. He reaches around and unsnaps my bra and shoves it down. His eyes ogle my tits, then his hands grope me.

"If you wanted to do that, you'd have done it." I can't even protest. He's right. His hands squeeze my tits together, and he bends and bites both of them at once. I hiss and push him away, and as I do, I turn to walk but he pushes me onto the bed right next to where I tossed my purse when I came in here. He's rough. I like it.

"If you're going to do it, at least use lube."

Kirk wastes no time pulling my panties off. The callouses on his fingertips scrape my skin. It's hard to imagine it's Allie with hands like that. I crawl farther onto the bed with my ass in the air and avoid looking into the mirror. He grabs my purse and opens it and rifles around in it, I'm assuming for a condom. Then he dumps it out next to me.

"Fuck's sake, dude. Nightstand," I growl, waiting. I'm starting to feel like it might work. Like he'll get me off and then I can happily dream of my Allie Bug. Oh shit, Allie, I wish this was you. Would you put your strap-on in my ass? Fuck me like you think I'm the hottest thing you've ever seen?

I hear the nightstand drawer, then a foil pack tear. Kirk drips lube down my crack and uses the tip of his sheathed dick to spread it. When he pushes in, it's rough and hard. This isn't how I would imagine Allie fucking me either. None of it is. No kissing, no touching. Just a dick in my ass stretching me. I try to massage my clit, but it's not stimulating, not arousing. So I close my eyes tightly and picture Allie on her knees behind me.

Fuck, Allie Bug, I need your help. I want to hear your voice.

"Shit... Kirk, this isn't working." Either he doesn't hear me, or he doesn't care. He keeps pushing into my ass at a steady pace. I grunt and sigh, not sure how to even care about this. I am literally being used as a blow-up doll... Until I see my phone and get an idea.

I look at the mirror. Kirk's eyes are shut and he's going at it. Such a turn off. Boobs are so much hotter.

I reach for my phone and navigate to my favorites and touch Allie's contact info. The screen lights up with a call to her and I say over my shoulder, "Keep your mouth shut."

"Mmm," Kirk grunts, gripping my hips.

I put the line on speaker phone and lay it on the bed in front of me, and Allie picks up. "Uh, hey, Beck."

"Allie," I say, trying to keep my voice from shaking. Kirk is fucking me so hard. "Just called to chat."

"Aw that's nice."

"Remember that night we had that girls' night? You remember when we were kissing and Jess had a fist in each of us?" I close my eyes again and let the sensation of Kirk's cock in my ass mingle with the sound of Allie's voice arouse me.

"Yeah," she snickers. "What about it?"

"Want to do it again? Only this time I eat you until you come first?" Oh fuck, yes, this is working. It's working, Allie Bug. Keep talking, get me off. "I want to eat you so bad, Allie. And I want to put my fist in you."

"Beck, you're being really... Uh..."

"Hmmm, fuck you tasted so good." Yes... say something naughty to me. Get me off, Allie.

"Uh..." Allie sounds apprehensive. That isn't going to get me off.

"Allie," I hear in the background. "This isn't funny. Help me get off--" The voice is cut off instantly by something covering the receiver, and rage instantly flares in my chest. "I gotta go, Beck. I'll call you later."

The line goes dead, and I close my eyes and bury my face in the comforter. Kirk grabs my hips so hard it hurts. Why am I doing this? Why do I let him use my body? And who is there with Allie asking her to get them off? Jess, you stupid whore. She is fucking mine. Allie, you should know better. Maybe Kirk is just what I need tonight... Maybe you deserve this too.

"Harder," I moan, though I'm not really feeling it, but if Allie is going to fuck someone else, so am I. "Fuck me harder, dammit." I reach back and spread myself for him, and he goes faster. It's not going to get me off, but that's not the point now. Just fuel my rage a little longer, Kirk. That bitch Jess is going to get it. No way she fucks my Bug. No one fucks Allie but me.

Chapter 34

Jess

I've been back at work for a few days now, but nothing feels the same. I'm going through the motions, not really exuberant about the job. I guess this is what they call depression, when you show up and do things but you feel a hollow emptiness inside. Not even visits with Jackson or cuddles with Shep work to pull me out of this funk. I've been sad and unmotivated for days. It all started that night when Allie and I did that thing with Beck. I saw how good they are, how excited Allie was to do that. I can't stand in the way of that.

I sit behind the check-in desk waiting for more parents to bring their children in. I'm not feeling well this morning either. Something strange happened the other night with Allie, and now she's avoiding me. Cora too... Like she is upset or hurt by something I did. All I know is Allie and I were really connecting and then I got so cold. I told her I had a fever, asked her to get the thermometer, but when she went to get up, I was shivering so violently she stayed. I never did find out if I was feverish, but now I just feel down, sick to my stomach too.

"Ms. Maier..." Mrs. Timmons stands with her little girl on her hip and a scowl on her face. "You're back."

"Yeah..." I stand and reach my arms out for Bethany. "I've been back for a few days. I just wasn't on check-in duty."

She doesn't hand the girl over the counter to check her in for the day, and I wonder what's wrong. "Kira Jenkins told me her daughter has been saying some colorful things, and now Bethany is walking around saying F-U-C-K all day." Her scowl deepens, and all I can think about is the day I was driving my car to get Allie some clothes because she was shrunken. It's not remorse over failing as a daycare worker, but something hits me.

"I'm sorry. I..."

"And now Bethany is having nightmares about her dolls walking around. She said the dollies talk to her, and it's freaking me out."

If this woman thinks that's freaky, she should walk a mile in my shoes, or just come have dinner at my house tonight. She has no idea the hell I've been living in for weeks now. All I want is to put things back to normal. The other morning when I woke up, our plan was to put Cora and Shep back to normal, and Allie just got up and raced out. Cora pouted about not wanting to be large again, and I felt depressed that Allie didn't even say goodbye. The shrink ray is still in the damn tub untouched, and we haven't even hidden the guns.

If someone comes looking for Cora again, I'm probably fucked. In fact, if Dean and Glenda snoop around too much, they'll see the guns sitting right in my living room. I haven't even locked them back up. What the fuck is wrong with me?

"Ms. Maier!" Mrs. Timmons snaps and I blink a few times and look at her.

"Sorry... I'm..."

"Here," she huffs. "Just try to keep the foul language to personal time. Bethany doesn't need to hear it. And if you could try working with her and the dolls, convince her they're not alive." She rolls her eyes at me as she hands Bethany over the counter. I take the toddler and set her on the ground, and she runs off to play. Once Mrs. Timmons signs her in, I return to my seat. I'm feeling nauseous.

This thing is starting to wear on me more than I thought. As if grieving GG wasn't hard enough to deal with, this is paralyzing. I am not emotionally equipped to handle this sort of thing. I don't think anyone is. I don't have a single person to talk to either, because fifty percent of my emotional issue stem from something Allie won't talk to me about. We need to have that conversation, but if we do, I may lose her.

Bethany sheds her jacket and throws it on the ground. Missy, my supervisor today, picks it up and hangs it on a hook near the shoe cubbies. I watch the kids running around playing. I want to think this is a normal day, that everything can be the way it should be, but the thought of Cora at home alone freaks me out. She could just leave my house and go to the neighbors and tell them. It's not like I didn't think this yesterday, but today she was in a foul mood when I made her coffee and gave her her toilet.

What if she's so upset with me that she just leaves? I mean, maybe it's just period hormones. She did say she'd need to figure that out because she was going to start soon. That's one thing I never had to think about with Allie because she got some implant thing to stop her from having a period for a while. God, this is too much. I can't do this.

I cup my face and lean down, planting my elbows on my knees, and I feel a little tap on my arm.

"Wook!"

I open my eyes to see Bethany's beaming face. Over her shoulder I see Toy Story playing on the monitor and the song You've Got a Friend in Me filters my direction. She thrusts a doll out toward me and grins, and for whatever stupid reason it makes my heart leap into my throat. The doll isn't scary; it's just an average doll with a little skirt and pigtails, which only reminds me of when Allie was shrunken. I try to calm my racing heart, but it just isn't having it today.

"Wook, she wearing dwess. She so tute!" Bethany shakes the doll and giggles. "She tawk to me too, say she wike me."

Oh my God, this kid needs to get this doll out of my face before I freak out. I'm not okay. I have a tiny shrunken woman in my home no bigger than the toy being shoved in my face right now, and all I can think about is how Allie keeps begging me to be her little toy, to shrink me and--oh my God.

I suck in a breath and feel dizzy. I blink my eyes, trying to hold myself upright as Bethany runs away, and Missy walks over to me. I must look like a fool, hyperventilating and swaying in my seat. My chest is heaving, and I'm gripping the counter like it's a life preserver. "Jess, you okay?" Missy asks, but I can't speak right now. All I can do is sway and stare.

"Jess..." She grabs my arm and looks around frantically. There is paper sack on the desk, used to hold some flash cards. She dumps them out and hands it to me, and I hold it to my mouth and whimper. "Wow, are you okay?"

Nodding, I breathe slowly, not taking too big of breaths. This has happened to me a few times before but never at work, and never because of a toy doll. I need a therapist so badly, or a friend, or both... And now the waterworks. Tears well up, and I blink, and they stream down my cheeks, dampening the sack I still hold to my face. I can't do this. I'm going to lose my job and have no place to live.

"Okay, yeah... You're not ready." Missy pulls me against herself, my head resting on her stomach as she rubs my hair. "Losing someone is hard, babe. You need more time. Look, you've taken all your bereavement pay, but you have twelve weeks of family medical time. I want you to use another week." She rubs my hair so nicely, just like Allie would, and that thought makes me cry harder. "I will see if the director will approve pay for it. He has to know what you've been through." Missy is such a kind woman.

"Thank you," I mumble into the bag. My voice sounds whiny and stupid, and I hate myself for having a mental breakdown, but she's right. I can't be here until I'm better, and at the rate I'm going, I'll never be better.

When I'm calm, I stand up and use a tissue to blow my nose. She lingers at my side holding my arm the whole time I'm trying to collect myself. "Go home, Jess. I'll keep an eye on the rugrats. I'll call Tammy and see if she can cover this week again." Tammy--a retired schoolteacher who volunteers now and then--has taken up my spot in the daycare. I owe her a plate of brownies or a day at the spa. These women are so incredible.