The Third Begining Ch. 02

Guilt

Unable to reconcile Mandy being the focus of my lust, I decided to try and push that guilt to one side and deal with it some other time.

My long-hidden lesbian feelings had resurfaced.

The only person close I felt suitable to discuss this subject with was Mandy, so I called her.

"I want to talk to you about a problem I am having with relationships and my feelings."

"That sounds intriguing, is it anyone I know?"

"I have no one else I trust and can talk to, when can we meet?"

"I will come over tomorrow if that is alright. John is playing golf, I can tell you more about America and fix up your visit to see us."

She excitedly replied.

We made our arrangements and said our goodbyes.

Mandy was a wonderful young woman, much in the mould of her father, and from what Bill had told me about her mother, Sophia's impetuous streak. He had lost Sophia to cancer when Mandy was just five years old.

Bill and I brought up Mandy.

We encouraged her to be confident, self-motivated and studious. She inherited her stunning looks from her Mother.

My mobile alerted me to a call from Lisi, which I answered, unlike the previous two calls I had avoided earlier.

"Hi, Lisi, how are you?"

"Oh, I am great, was getting worried I had upset you or you were ill as I had called earlier with no answer. Are you alright?"

"Never better. I have a lot to mull over and a lot going on, I wanted to have one of those idle days with my thoughts. I have just retrieved my mobile from my bedroom to call Mandy, so I have just seen the missed calls. I am sorry to worry you but I am fine."

"Mandy is going to America for six months with her husband John for his work.

I encouraged her to go. It will be good for her. She is coming to visit me, will you be in tomorrow? I would love you to meet her."

After a short silence, Lisi replied.

"I will be at home all day Eli. I would love to meet Mandy. Just call me and let me know just before you set off."

"See you tomorrow, bye Lisi and thank you for an exciting, interesting, enjoyable day yesterday."

"Exciting? My maxim is, to never overthink things, go with your instincts and never worry about things out of your control. Bye-bye Eliza, sleep well."

"Good night, Lisi darling."

Did I say, darling?

I went to bed, still wearing her sexy thong and bra. The panties were sticky from my constant turned-on state and needed washing, and so did I.

I was soon lost in my lust-induced masturbation thinking about the closeness of Lisi yesterday, the sexual tension in her bedroom, her touch, her pouty pussy, holding her breasts, imagining going further and wanting to.

Rubbing vigorously at my wet slippy pussy, I savoured my fantasy-induced climax with force, imagining Lisi rubbing her tight naked body on me.

I slept well again but woke at my usual time, Seven Thirty a.m. Once more, I felt guilty about my lesbian fantasies.

I showered, noticing the sensitivity of my nipples and my self-abused pussy.

After showering, I washed the bra and thong carefully by hand, imagining Lisi wearing them, her boobs and pussy visible through the transparent material, and hung them over the shower to dry.

Surprised by my hunger, I prepared and ate, ravenously, the favourite breakfast of my late husband.

After a full English breakfast of local produce, feeling pleasantly full, I went for a brisk walk along the seafront with my camera slung over my shoulder. I walked as far as the shell sculpture on the beach.

I captured various images and observed the fishing boats, other walkers, families, cyclists and dog walkers.

On my return, I tidied up the lounge and sat on the sofa with a magazine, more relaxed than I had been for a while.

Mandy arrived, let herself into the cottage with her key and called out to me.

"Hi Mommy."

We met in the hall, embraced, kissed cheeks, smiled at each other and went into the lounge.

I made us tea, and we sat together on the sofa.

I told her I had made a friend in the town called Lisi and suggested we visit her later.

I enquired about John, and Mandy exclaimed excitedly.

"John is so excited about America and his new job, it means lots more money, we leave in four weeks, so much to do and arrange.

I have given my notice at work.

We both have some leave owing so we can have a week off together to do things for the trip, I need some lightweight clothes and bikinis, as we will be living in California."

She came up for breath, so I managed to offer any help they wanted and to go shopping.

"If its is OK with you, I want to stop here tonight. I have to get my overnight bag and move the car as I managed to park in the High Street."

"I will book a table at the White Swan for eight p.m., No cooking for us tonight."

I went with Mandy to get her bag and returned to the cottage with it while she parked the car elsewhere.

I called and booked a table for dinner.

On her return, we went upstairs, taking her bag.

"I will make up the bed for you."

"Mommy, I will slip in with you, we can have girly night, like when Dad was away on trips from home."

I opened my bedroom door to put in her overnight bag. I noticed the embarrassing, messy, unmade bed.

My self-satisfying sexual exertions over the last few hours had left the sheets in knots and covers strewn on the floor.

I tidied the room and made the bed as Mandy watched from the doorway with a bemused look that conveyed her surprise that my usually pristine bedroom was not just so.

I looked at Mandy, smiled weakly and shrugged.

"I have had a couple of strange, busy few days and I need your advice."

I sat on the side of the bed and patted it, indicating I wanted Mandy to sit.

I took her hand and took a deep breath.

"I love you. As my daughter, I would never want to upset you.''

Mandy looked at me nervously.

''I loved your Dad more than anything in the world. We had a great marriage. I still love his memory.

I have been having thoughts and feelings. I miss companionship, being needed, loved in an emotional and sexual sense and wanted sexually.

I have sexual needs and want someone to cuddle in bed.

I am embarrassed to say I even find my urges have me looking at women that way."

I had admitted to my daughter my attraction to women.

Mandy's eyes welled up.

I held her hand and attempted to reassure her.

"Sweetie, do not get upset, nothing has changed, my needs and sexual and emotional feelings have surfaced, that is all."

Mandy asked.

"Have you met someone, a guy, a woman?"

I shook my head.

"No. Not yet."

I smiled weakly at her.

"What you said was beautiful. You are wonderful, Mommy."

She hugged me.

"You should move on without any remorse. You are a great Mother, been a great wife to Dad, you need to do what is right for you, as long as you include me too."

She smiled. We embraced and sobbed.

"Perhaps we can visit your friend when I have finished showering."

Mandy removed her dress, affording me a view of her superb breasts topped with dark brown hard nipples. I could not stop myself staring.

While I waited and sat on the bed, I telephoned Lisi to inform her of our visit, becoming flustered from speaking to Lisi, reliving my visit as we spoke. I suddenly remembered the drying lingerie set in the showroom, knowing Mandy would notice them.

When Mandy returned to me, she looked lovely, fresh and vital. My daughter was a beautiful woman. She dressed casually. I felt she lingered doing so, subtly showing herself to me and stirring my feelings again.

We walked to the apartment. I explained to Mandy how I knew Lisi, how shocking some of her comments and actions were and that she was fun.

Mandy pointed out her BMW parked on The Crag near our destination.

Lisi must have been watching our approach as the door buzzed, allowing us up to her apartment door, which was ajar.

I called out to Lisi.

"We are here darling."

I had called her darling, why? I hoped Mandy did not notice.

Lisi called us in and gave me an enthusiastic embrace, a kiss on the cheek and a broad smile.

I introduced Mandy to Lisi, and they briefly hugged.

We went into her lounge and admired the view over the beach. Mandy appraised the apartment professionally, complimenting the conversion and praising the location.

As the day was warm and sunny, we sat on the balcony with soft drinks and chatted.

Lisi told Mandy,

"I feel I know you Mandy, your mother has told me a lot about you, all good, of course."

Mandy smiled.

"The bad things are much more fun, I will fill you in one day."

We chatted about the apartment, property, clothes, and America, where Lisi informed us she had worked when she was younger and gave lots of advice to Mandy on her forthcoming trip.

After about an hour, we left Lisi, exchanging hugs, and with a bag with my laundered clothes, we returned to my cottage.

"I like her. I like her a lot. I feel I have seen her before somewhere, a photograph of her maybe. She is attractive, and beauty, like hers, is hard to forget.

What does Lisi do for a living, does she act and how old is she?"

"Lisi is beautiful, works in promotions and she is forty-three."

Mandy peeked into the bag Lisi gave me. She asked with raised eyebrows.

"Is Lisi taking in washing?"

Pulling out the note on top of my laundered clothes, she read it out loud, to my embarrassment.

Eli darling.

I will try not to get you so wet, slippy and messy next time. Lisi X.

"Wet, Slippy and messy! A capital X kiss, Eli darling. My mind boggles Mommy, how exciting."

I blushed and flushed.

"It is not what you think."

I blurted out.

"What do you think, I thinking?"

She smirked.

I was so flustered, that I cut the conversation short, saying as I picked up my purse and went through the front door.

"We need some milk."

Mandy had pondered the note, the visit, her recognition of Lisi from somewhere and the earlier conversation. Adding two and two and making five, I thought.

We got ready to walk to the White Swan Hotel for dinner. We dressed casually. Strolling with arms linked, Mandy apologised for embarrassing me earlier.

I assured her I was comfortable with what she said and that the wet, slippy mess was from suntan oil while we sunbathed on the balcony.

Turning to her, trying to rib her, I asked.

"What did you think she meant."

She smiled and squeezed my arm,

"Why did you not both sunbathe nude? That is such a pity! I was expecting something juicier, like torrid lesbian sex or mud wrestling. Just so you know. I would with Lisi, in a flash, she is hot."

Mandy had a way of embarrassing me and others. Did she know I was attracted to Lisi?

We had an excellent meal and shared a bottle of wine.

I steered the conversation away from Lisi and talked more about Bill and missing him.

It was a warm evening, so we walked back home along the seafront arm in arm, cutting into the High Street near my cottage.

After a coffee, we went to bed.

When I came out of the bathroom in a sensible white cotton bra and panties, Mandy slipped out of bed as I slid into it. Mandy was naked. When she returned from the bathroom to bed, I did my best to avoid her seeing me staring at her beautiful naked body and her hard nipples.

She snuggled to me and wriggled to get comfortable, her boobs and hard nipples squashing into my back, causing my breath to catch.

"I miss this Mommy."

She whispered in my ear.

Her arm looped around me, her hand resting on my left boob. I expelled my held breath in a gentle hiss, not wishing to let her know the effect she was having on me.

"This is so good Mommy, I love you so much."

She whispered.

"I miss a cuddle sweetie."

I sighed.

We both drifted off.

I stirred from a deep sleep as dawn broke.

My leg was stretched over Mandy, resting on the naked body. I was rubbing my wet panty-covered pussy on her bare hip, with my right hand holding her left boob and snuggling to her, my lips about to kiss her neck.

I sat up with a start, realising what I was doing, shocked, embarrassed and fully awake.

The sudden movement had Mandy awake, sensing I was disturbed, wrapping her arms around my body.

"Are you alright, Mommy?

She whispered in my ear, brushing her lips on it as she did.

"No reason to be upset, we all have needs. I was enjoying the feel of you against me."

I stuttered. My embarrassment was palatable.

"I am sorry sweetie I must have been dreaming, please forgive me."

She kissed my forehead, ears, and cheeks with tender concern, murmuring shh, shh, then kissed me on my lips.

We sank back on the bed, facing each other.

Mandy gently pulled my head to her bare chest and comforted me. She stroked my hair and back and kissed the top of my head.

At this point, my feelings changed towards my daughter.

My lips returned her kisses to the swell of her upper chest.

She held her left breast to my mouth.

Being Mother and Daughter was forgotten.

I kissed her boob, she liked it. Mandy moved so her nipple was at my lips. I kissed and sucked the offered hard nipple for ages, which made her purr like a cat.

We moved so we were face to face.

I apologised for taking advantage of her, unsure and concerned about our actions but wanting more.

Saying what I felt about her, she whispered to me.

"I love you, Mommy, I will do anything and I do mean anything, for your happiness, I want you so much it hurts!"

Mandy put her hand around the back of my neck, pulled me into her and firmly kissed me full on my lips.

Her mouth opened, her tongue pushed into my mouth, and mine into hers.

Our kiss was intense, passionate and sexual. We embraced till Mandy undid my bra and removed it with my help. Mandy kissed me, suckled on my right nipple, and draped her leg across me.

It was sublimely intense to feel her lips on my nipple. Her body heat and nakedness, to smell her perfume and to sense her need for me.

My heart was beating fast, my body was hot with lust, and my panties were wet from our kissing and her suckling on my nipple. The wrongness of the illicit act of love for each other overwhelmed me.

She pushed me back, kissing and sensuously bitting my breasts and nipples, slipped her hand down the front of my panties, her fingers insinuating through my sparse pussy hair, over my pronounced clitoris to my cleft formed by my puffed-up sensitised pussy lips, while kissing each other.

I was in heaven as she rubbed up and down my wet cunt several times with two fingers and then dipped them into my soaking wet vagina, in and out, in and out, finger fucking me.

On and on finger fucking me, exciting me more and then more by rubbing my clitoris with her thumb simultaneously. She bit my lip, dipped her head and teased my nipple with her teeth, and I climaxed.

I shuddered, shook, whimpered, gasped and grabbed her hand to stop the exquisite torcher of her fingers in my vagina.

Mandy was smiling, a tight smile caused by my grip on her hand with one hand and her thigh with my other. I relaxed my grip on her. Her smile eased into a broad grin.

"Sweetie, thank you that was wonderful, I can not believe what we have done. It is so wrong."

Mandy kissed me.

"I can, it was amazing, all that I have dreamed of, it is what I have wanted for a long time and want more now!"

Kneeling, face to my feet, her pert bum up in the air, she pushed my damp panties down, moved my legs apart and delved into my pussy with her tongue, lashing my clitoris, sending me off on a roller coaster of pleasure, making me gasp for breath, pushing myself harder onto her rasping tongue.

I came, again and again, rolling orgasms not experienced for many years.

My knowledge and instincts came from my past as I pulled her leg over my head and pulled her juicy, shaved pussy to my mouth and sucked, nibbled, licked and probed her vagina with my tongue. Mandy was very wet and tasted sweet. I loved what I was doing.

I had not done any of this for years and regretted it.

What we were doing was wrong, so taboo but exciting.

While she licked me, she came from my devoted worship of her cunt with several long shudders.

She collapsed on me, spent and body limp.

Righting ourselves, we kissed, tasting our juices on our lips, which turned me on again.

We French kissed, our tongues tonsil deep, grinding our wet cunts together, pussy to pussy, clit to clit, labia to labia.

God, I thought, why have I not done this before?

We both went over the top and orgasmed. Hot, sweaty and sexually sated for now, we petted for a few minutes and then drifted off to sleep.

On waking, my overwhelming feelings were a strange mix of satisfaction, sexual awareness, and guilt, having incestuous sex with my stepdaughter, my legal daughter.

What had I done?

How would we deal with it?

Wide awake but feigning sleep. I lay still on my tummy, body relaxed but mind doing somersaults, turning over what Mandy and I had done. The emotional and sexual pleasure was almost overwhelming, but the guilty feelings weighed heavily on me.

The sensuality of our coupling was the best I had ever experienced, not that I was very experienced at all, but the action of having sex with my stepdaughter. How could I?

My body answered. My hand slid to my pussy, seemingly of its own accord. I found it wet, hot and slippy.

I vigorously fingered myself.

Aware Mandy was asleep next to me, I raised myself and looked at her beautiful naked body, with early morning sunlight falling across her stunning body, lying on her back, legs apart, lewd but sensual and available. I briefly studied her mons, her fleshy pussy lips slightly open, a little red from our rubbing attention earlier. I dipped my head and lapped at her vulva with the thirsty fervour of a stranded desert survivor with the first water for a week.

Sweet-tasting Mandy, I could not get enough of her.

I licked and sucked frantically, and not surprisingly, she woke. She held my head to her pussy and humped my face, repeating over and over,

"Thank you, Mommy, thank you, Mommy."

She orgasmed with force, drenching my mouth and satisfying my thirst with her wetness.

She pulled me up her body, face to face, we kissed, and she licked my face as a cat would, cleaning me of her juices.

It was so sensual. I could not help myself. I moved my body to position it between the tanned legs of my daughter, sex to sex and humped Mandy with animal lust, kissing her with force.

We both climaxed, her first, me quickly following, as good as earlier, satisfying our growing feelings for each other.

We showered together, not getting too sexual with each other, just a little soaping, light touches and kisses.

Mandy dressed, and as I was about to get dressed, Mandy handed me the bra and thong I borrowed from Lisi.

"These look sexy, Mommy. Put them on for me, please."

I put it on without fuss, getting strange thoughts of Mandy unknowingly admiring lingerie owned and worn by Lisi and myself, knowing she had worn them.

She adjusted the thong much as Lisi did. Touching my pussy and boobs, getting me turned on, getting me thinking of Thursday and our encounter.

"This is sexy, Mommy."

Mandy said as she slid a long, manicured finger over my thong-covered, pronounced pussy lips, making me damp again.

"You look good enough to eat, again."

She whispered as she stroked my pussy lips, getting them wetter and me about to lose control again.

With a brief kiss and embrace, she left the bedroom, saying over her shoulder, sex makes me hungry.

I am starving. I will get breakfast.

I could not help myself. Mandy had me dangling in a sexual haze.

Mandy, with her subtle touches, had set me off again. My fingers were inside the thong and on my clit in a flash. I needed to come again. What was wrong with me? Need outweighed my guilt.