All Comments on 'The Traject Ch. 04'

This series just keeps circling the drain. Worse every chapter and it wasn't very good to begin with. Makes me wanna go all emo and cut myself with a razor or something. Talk about depressing. Who wants to read this shit? Last week started off so great. A great story from Mainefiddleheads. It ended so great, a great story from Blackrandl1958. Then this pile of rubbish posted today. It's going to be another rough week in LW. Don't you two have another story you could give us? How about some of you old guys? Don't let the cum slurpers and the dick suckers take over. Or, the suicide inducing crap like this.

There seems to be a lot missing and this chapter is somewhat disjointed.

This was a transition part...About him returning home...Then in the end, Angie showed up again...maybe next part will explain how they got together again...3*

You say 1) you can't understand who'd want to read this and 2) it makes you want tpo kill yourself. My responses are:

1) obviously you wanted to read it

2) I don't think anyone will stop you.

If you can write better stories, then please do so. Otherwise, shut up.

Is seemed like the author just wanted this series of stories to end so let's just make it waking up from a dream and everything is alright.

Why return home? If all the hated mother wanted him to do was forgive his brother, he could've done that with a letter or a visit to his prison. He returned home leaving a good girl and a new job behind for nothing. It just didn't fit in the story from the previous chapters. The father's revelation that he also was married to a slut wife was unneeded.

All effort in this chapter should've been our hero finally discovering a long lasting love and WE should have been part of that discovery, but instead we got the wake up version.

Sorry, but I felt the possibilities of a great story was lost due to the lack of interest of the author.

Not sure what this was. Good writing but reads as a setup for more of the tale.

2* really don't like that type writing, and serials with long delays are just a waste of time, you create scenes with no real links or carry through. Sort of like a person of multiple personalities jumping from one to another with no reason or meaning. Blaming picking wrong women on the military is trash, its a character flaw.

Seems to have some missing pages.

Why write this short , never finishing his return home, you said you are taking a haitus from writing for a summer break? And you leave us readers hanging. That is a bad deal.

good story

Since you will probably give us another chapter of D's life. I do not know if it be after this one or previous to it! Very interesting characters...

You totally lost me on the last page and I did read the whole story. There were big gaps missing. He went home... saw his brother... but what happened at home?

oh well.

with these folks. Something is missing, not even a cliffhanger. I am enjoying the multiple stories in the series but it almost appears you left this one incomplete to move on to the next one. UT OH, I just assumed there will be more to the series and we all know what happens when you assume............ Good work up to the last page or so...

of days waiting and reading for that finish. I feel deceived and that leaves me pissed off. 1*

Either you left out 2 pages of this chapter, or it went absolutely nowhere

What the hell was it?

Where is the rest of this? Huge gaps in what was, at least until now, an exceptionally interesting and fluid story.

Conversation with his brother, his dad, Sandoval, Cece, who is and where the hell did Angie cone from? Where are we both in location and time? What happened?

I feel like your story is slipping away from you...I have been a big fan but this last chapter is kind of all over the map with no clear direction. You need to pull it together quickly...maybe think about wrapping it up and moving on to a new story my friend.

"Buckeye Fan"

I agree with many of the other comments. This wasn't a finale, it seemed like a bunch of thoughts that just ended. I know that good endings are the most difficult to achieve and this just didn't get there.

I love your story telling an look forward to the next effort. And, thank you for your efforts to entertain us.

...did this time. Did you grow tired of the story, or are you more engaged in the next part coming after the summer ramblings that call to you?

Oh, and "grinded"..... Really?

But thank you in general, because while this last installment left me a bit cool, the whole has been a great and grand journey.

For that, I thank you.

First three chapters were a great story. It has been a while since I looked forward to the next chapter of any story on here. Seems like your thoughts got ahead of your writing and got bored and ended it . Might need a redo on this last chapter.

Too much time and circumstance jumping. So Angie's in the future, and this is all reminiscence? Interesting twist with his Mom being a whore too. A lot of contrived reasoning and reasons, but I guess you make the characters do and say what you need to move the story along. Kind of lame and unrealistic. He could just as easily have stayed with his new love in Arizona and told his family to fuck off. Really just makes him and all his choices that much more stupid, and therefor boring.

I'll finish this confusing mess after you do. Thanks for trying.

it is erratic, wandering, and unknowing. We've all heard the sayings "the best laid plans etc., and too many things are apt to force us to change directions in life, no matter what we want....like fucked by the fickle finger of fate.....

PapaGus

4*

Good writing is not enough.

Without a story...there is no...well...no story, and without a story, its just words.

Its OK not to plot and not to outline, although doing those things (which require effort and work) make writing better. Its OK just to sit down and write stream of consciousness.

But you have to go somewhere. Where? Its your story. But somewhere.

Going nowhere is not a story.

and a blood disorder. TK U MLJ LV NV

and not let live give you whatever. TK U MLJ LV NV

Ok and entertaining story until the last chapter. What happened? Did the ending of another story get pasted on this one?

What an utterly fucked up way to leave off the telling of a story.

I gave you 4 and 5 stars for all the other chapters but for this one???

⭐⭐⭐ and that's being generous.

Why his mother was so interested in reuniting D with Ann. It also appears Daemon is about to be right back where he started so long ago, it broke Angel... It seems to me a lot of the people making comments are missing large subtle pieces of the stories. I still think he lost more of his self worth when he didn't have a talk with the Doctor about Barbara's betrayal of them both. Signed: BTW

This series was definitely written by a woman, there are way to many times the emotions D was feeling were absolutely not what a man would feel, yet a hundred percent what a woman would think a man would feel in given situation, that occurred several times, as well as certain ways he reacted just wasn't real, I could see the female perception of how they think a man "would" feel or act. Not only the occurrence of female perception about the way he felt and acted but also the how these beautiful, compassionate, and understanding women in the story constantly just popped into his life, and how they also were all fine with his shattered phycie. -Sorry that is pure unicorns and dragons there for sure, these stories were either written by a woman or a 12 year old boy, there is no lived experience by a man. Real broken men end up like Barbara said suicided or we end up all alone without society and/or any women giving two shits about US! You can see us in the tent cities growing in every town and city across Canada and the States we use what ever substance that will stop the nightmares while we try to hold the broken pieces of what was our lives together.