All Comments on 'The Traveller'

One of the most interesting and creative takes on "time travel" that I've read. Well thought out, plotted and developed. Kudos.

5 stars. effing brilliant. please keep writing.

Gentle, caring, loving, mysterious, engaging ... perhaps inspired by Outlander or similar but unique and its own story. Thoroughly enjoyable.

Oh my god! It is the best time travelling story, I have ever come across. Would love to see more parts if that would be possible.

Thank you author. Unique, sweet and very entertaining. A delight to read.

I'm 76 yo and this story drew me back in time when I was 18 and a fan of fantasy novels... Thank you to the author : you did a great job Mr or Ms.

I was not expecting to get so immersed in this! Aside from a couple of editing errors, this was an incredible story! Great job!

Absolutely fascinating story Miss _D_Mena. Your talent amazes me once again. Thank you so much for entertaining me with your wonderful imagination. I would like to know what happens next and just how does Sam fit into this? but perhaps you will not take this further which makes me a litle sad. Take care. regards Frankie1952.

Spectacularly suitable for Armistice Day,

I've got to say. You are fast becoming a favourite of mine.

Lovely story.

Thank you

Outstanding!

What a wonderful story. Thank you.

What an engrosing story. I so enjoyed the simple eroticism of this brilliantly written tale, to the point that I am now going to check out your other stories.

Wow! What an incredible story! Loved it, every word!

Another fantastic story! Congratulations!

A rather different, unusual and slightly strange concept and plot line. I congratulate you! Yahtzee’s being said I noticed several grammatical errors and that is distracting. You need better proof reading or an editor.

I wish your story was a novel that I could read for days, well done!

FANTASTIC, not an erotic tale, but a most romantic one!! LOVED IT!!

My thoughts are you should be considering maybe a change in your field of endeavor with your writing skills. I enjoyed the story line and concur with other comments, I would have enjoyed this from a book perspective.

Well done!

A great read not erotic put interesting none the less

What a wonderful story. Very creative. You ought to be able to make a living writing. q

As someone said earlier, it was not erotica. More of a romance novel. And I will admit to, while not liking stroke stories, absolutely liking some wicked hot monkey sex interwoven into the tale. But this. Maybe it wasnt erotica, but it was a damn fine story that cause a but of dust to gather in my eye. You unquestionably have talent. FIVE.

Jedd

Every so often, a truly unique story is posted on this site and while I love searching for them, I love finding them even more. Thanks for your efforts!!

Fabulous!

A truly engrossing tale of romance and intrigue. Well done!

WOW what a tear junker , I loved it (except for the Deep British English ) , thank goodness for on-line Dictionary , Encyclopedia . 5*'s

Thanks for the read

txcracker

A really intriguing story using time travel while weaving in a love story through a family. Well put together and very enjoyable to read.

Holy Shit - that was AMAZING!!! This story is in its own class. If I could give it a 10, I would. Thanks!

What a great & well-told story!!! Quite the little twist! 😃

The story is enjoyable, and I've learned to deal with the Brit dialect of English (maybe, probably, kind of).

I could be wrong, but I imagine that the rules of quotation marks, even in Britain, have not been followed, not even once. I feel confident in that, because no quotation marks appeared in the story, and even assuming to replace them were the apostrophes were used, there was quite a bit of butchering in their placement. Those little buggers are like parenthesis, they always, ALWAYS come in pairs. In this story, they only occasionally showed up that way.

To me, the innumerable run-on sentences and missing commas came very close to ruining the read. The author really needs to work on those two things, or find somebody that can do a good job of it as an editor.

You probably won't find a free editor that will do a good enough job of it. The writing is fine (sorry, the Brit dialect excepted, but I'm trying hard not to hold that against the writing), so a hack editor will hurt more than help.

I'm making this comment for the sole purpose of improvement opportunity. A good story is hurt by mechanical problems because there is a reason for the rules of grammar: proper grammar improves the ease of reading, and an easier read is enjoyed more, even by those who don't know grammar rules themselves, but immensely by those who do.

This story tricked me. As it unfolded, I thought for sure it was going to turn out Adam was his own father. I enjoyed the way it played out, but that also would have been an interesting plot twist,

I applaud the way you spent just the right amount of time at each episode in the time line. Innocence, love, and magic, who could ask for more.

I don't usually comment on stories, but this one was very well written! I do have a question, though: when you say he fucked their fannies, you do mean to refer to their asses, yes? I've read a few other stories on here, & there's usually a bit more buildup between pussy and ass, so I'm simply curious!

Great story. a very interesting story line. I liked the characters and the twists that you put in it. Thanks for your time and imagination.

Came for incest, stayed for enchanted time-travel and now as I leave, I leave with a heart thoroughly warmed and a mind thoroughly fucked! Now if that's not two hours 'well spent', scratch that 'well invested', then I don't know what is.... Thank you for an audaciously wonderful story. Ash.

A truly unique and mesmerizing plot. Thank you!

@Anonymous: fanny is British slang for the front side.

I can’t say it any better than AzureAsh did below. So double for me. Thanks

Well written, easy to imagine being there. Im impressed and look forward to your other stories.

Truly loved this story. I could see this in my mind, almost felt like I could see that water. It captured my heart. Like others have said this would be a great novel. SAM and her glowy fingers?? I am soooo soooo curious now. Thank you, thank you, thank you for this little gem.

I love it

Star-crossed love, Time-travel, Reincarnation, and Fate/destiny. The story takes you on a great adventure. A question still remains, Sam? What part in this did she truly play? The Shimmering finger tips!?! It's the only thing still tweeking in the back of my head. I'd love to see another part where this is answered but, can live with not knowing. This is a great tale. Thanks for sharing.

oh my god, thank you so much !! masterpiece!! Now whats about Sam.. ;-)

Hope you will continue this amazing story.

Really a lovely story Miss D mena you have a real talent

What a totally enjoyable mind bending complex adventure! This is the first time I had to go back and reread a couple passages to fully fit the plot line together. That is a compliment not a criticism. As several commenters have already said, this story is way beyond the standards usually found on Litreotica. I cannot start to imagine the thought process or effort to assemble a fantasy this complex and relate it so well. Thank you for sharing this wonderful work.

Cheers

SAGE

A few bugaboos, but what an amazing story. Bravo. Favorited.

Thanks for sharing. 5* Slainté

Terrific story - well written, too!

Great storytelling. I loved this. Thanks

A lovely story, very well told - five stars!

One small point - the plural of "ball" is "balls", not "ball's". You use apostrophes with all of your plurals and it's surprising - you write so well, otherwise.

Awesome!! Mind truly fucked. There aren't too many stories where you're not sure who the main protagonist was at the end of the story. Brilliant!!

This story was better the second time around. It was 5 stars the first time and 10 stars this time.

I love that you tell great stories, not jerk off junk.

Outstanding story!!! Tell me if I'm wrong,,,, but in my mind Sam has to be the spirit of the unborn child!!!!! That's the only explanation for the glowing fingers in my mind.... So now all three souls have found their way back together... Such a beautiful story!!! I lost my wife just over 15 years ago to a car crash.... I pray I get to see her again some day....

this is an outstanding story. I am speechless. well done, very well done indeed.

From the thoughtful twist to the wonderful unfolding, a wonderful tale from beginning to end.

Thank you!!

I loved it.

The only part i didnt like is that Annie didnt tell them the truth about Adam being their father

Tears and chills! Great story.

What a story! Outstanding!

Absolutely magnificent story! Ignoring the possible paradoxes with being in his own timeline, this story was a superbly spun tale of the timeless love of soul mates trying to find one another again. Had to read a few of the passages over in order to grasp the idea you were trying to pass on, and was a little unclear as to why Annie had not told Jean who he really is, but the ending tied everything together nicely. Wonderfully imaginative writing. You should really think about writing books, you have a real talent for storytelling. 5⭐ DOUBLED

Rafe

What a unique story. I loved it! Thank you, miss_d_mena, for sharing with us.

5 stars.

This wonderful story could have easily been in the Sci-Fi/Fantasy category even though it did involve the Incest/Taboo matter contained within it. It was a very pleasant read with excellent character development and with a smooth line of discovery for Adam over each "jump" in time. The finale was outstanding as the characters came together to share their experiences that occurred in the past which brought them to that particular moment in time. Please continue writing as your talent for spinning tales is so enjoyable.

What a great story encapsulating so many elements that up a superb storyline.

I've been looking for stories like this that have a wonderfully flowing story without all the wham-bam's so many authors seem to think a story needs to be enjoyable.

I'd give it more STARS if I could but 5 out of 5 is perfection

Wow. Just wow!

What a beautiful story, with such well written characters. That was amazing. Thank you!

Really great lovely story, wonderfully intelligent … it even makes you feel smarter and better. Thank you so much!

[12.11.23]

Flippin' brill!

Truly the dawgz bollocks!

But i am truly gobsmacked that in over 3 years NOBODY has mentioned all of the David Robert Jones (A.K.A.- David Bowie) references:

1) 'Life on Mars' a brill series involving time travel and not just a track on David Bowie's 1971 L.P. Hunky Dory (my favourite exactly) and Adam's responce as to how he felt.

2) Sam (A.K.A. - Samantha) being from the aforementioned series being John Simm's (A.K.A. - the BEST Master) forename in the series.

3) Tyler being Adam's middle name being from the aforementioned series being John Simm's (A.K.A. - the BEST Master) surname in the series.

4) Sara being from Labyrinth (minus the h)?

5) A lad insane = An unused alternate title to Aladdin Sane (Bowie's 1973 masterpiece about Ziggy in America), also Love Aladdin Vein was an alternate title.

11/10 Bowie Bonds!!!!!

Just about as good as I’ve read. Truly inspired