All Comments on 'The Triple Tragedy'

Should have let her die.

You speak for all of us who were cuckoled by slimy whore wives. Our hatred of all women will live forever as long as we band together. This story is wimpy weak because Tom wasn't given any chance to tie that bitch Lisa up and slowly cut her to ribbons with a knife and burn her with a cigaret lighter and laugh while she screamed.

... Is pretty dire I'm afraid. Your dialog is very stilted.mtry this. When you write dialog, try reading it aloud. You'll discover very fast that people don't say things like "for sure!" In the way you think they do.

Not a terrible story though. It does, at least, have a plot.

I cannot say I liked it. Her final lines, including "because I never loved him..." simply made me not care. Could have, should have, been a decent crime novella. With better characters, more in depth plot, and an honest mystery twist, it would have been.

Writing was ok but the plot line was pretty weak. Like reading a badly written Perry Mason episode (black and white TV screen included) where everything has to be built and solved in one episode with commercials. The cheap moral advice at the end was a real yawner. I suspect English is the second language of the writer based on phrasing. (That's not really a criticism, just an observation.)

IronDragon, that's no way to get a daily dose of cream pies! Only a true cuck like yourself doesn't enjoy a nice cream pie from their wife and her sexy bull!

signed,

Various anonymous cucks who don't realize what a cuck is and is not.

That is God Damn right! Cheaters by their very actions do not love their spouses! That is why the decision as to what to do with one of them is so simple! For the most part cheaters are not really very good actors, they lack depth and integrity as people. The offended spouse most accept some of the blame for deceiving themselves as much as being deceived by the cheater. If you know any cheaters, and you take a good look at them, they are either stupid, crazy or a bit of both. If you view their other actions you will find that they fit the pattern of a selfish person who does not hesitate to burden others with their responsibilities. Pay attention, that is the best way to avoid scum in your personal and professional lives.

Your stories do not flow. They read like statements and poor exchanges of notes rather that a fluid conversation.

Ending totally sucked.

Prwtty good story. To hell with the yahoos that piss and moan.

Good crime tale and slutty wife story. Guess you get what u pay for in a state employee. Pay more, get a better average

staff.

Comment to LW authors - only overacting women in Mexican soap operas "howl" and "wail" in grief over getting caught slutting or other minor drama that doesnt involve the death of someone they love deeply. Crying, snivelling, whining, sobbing sure but tone down the hyperdramatic nonsense. It does not portray a woman who feels real remorse. Or even half convincing actinf. Just looks stupid.

Too bad Lisa didn't get AIDS and die a slow, painful, lonely death for cheating on and using her husband the way she did

whats to become in life isn't sweeter, TK U MLJ LV NV

It's obvious that you confuse "screaming" with sobbing. If she screamed as much as you said, she would have damaged her larynx. Permanently. Then, her callous affairs are out of character. Then you're private investigator...total bollocks. And the idea that she "suddenly" loved Tom once her lover was dead? Really? Love?

Do you even understand the concept of writing a story? The fact that your characters have to be congruent, they have to be human and they have to, have to, have to follow reality.

Yours failed.

Pretty good story. Looking forward to more from you.

A good concept but could have been better. The dialogue was unreal and the ending did not ring true. It seems to arouse passions in some commenters but it is c1992w's story, there is not need to create an alternative.

Do not stop writing. I will not stop writing too.

Duna

Good Consequence story.

Utter garbage! could not finish page 1! its worse than a soap opera 1*

I don't recall reading why Tom was released from jail or why George broke into the house. Without reasons for these two events, the finale could not be understood.

But your writing really needs work. It came off very childish. There was no mystery, we all knew who did it from the start and your characters were totally one dimensional.

I still give you credit for trying and encourage you to keep writing but try to make each one better than the last.

By the way, the real Sidney Reilly spelled his name like that.

The first loverboy killed the second loverboy and the first loverboy wanted to kill the serial cheater wife. Yes it is a very rare situation in the life, but it may be rarly, the broke up couses such jelousy for the lover that he wants to kill sometimes.

c1992w your first story is your best story.

Good idea. Leaving this genre. Do something that is easier .You can write again, later. Much later is better.

You need more experience. More practice. And more ageing. Good Luck.

AMerryMan

So the fucking cunt is happy? No regret about deceiving her "husband" all those years? Why isn't she suffering like a cheating cunt wife should?

Thank you in advance for not writing anymore LW tales.

To make the story flow better, I recommend that you get an editor who not only understands the grammar but also the smaller nuances of idioms. You try to give too much information to make your point, e.g. when the wife was asked to get to get the "perp" (no one uses that phrase anymore) some water in a "VERY CLEAN GLASS" , normal language dictates that one would assume the glass to be clean. This does not need to be stated. Good luck in your future writings.

For sharing.

a CUCK LOVING, WIMP MALES PROMOTING, cheating WHORE wife APOLOGIST writer .....

"DON'T LET THE DOOR HIT YOU ON THE WAY OUT OF THE LOVING WIVES SECTION....... ASSHOLE!!!!"

but for whom and whats next, TK U MLJ LV NV

He is a wimp, he deserve what he get, this tale dont make any sense

The dancing slut wife did not get what she deserved, justice. She went for years being a slut, not giving her husband any respect or sex (evidently). Fuck her, she should at least had the crap beaten out of her by either the killer or her husband. Not that I agree with beating on women but she did deserve it.

Thanks for the story. The guy rightly divorced her--he wasn't a wimp. Ignore the ignorant comments.

seems written by a wimp

He wasn't a wimp, but he loved and trusted her...Two different things...After all the events he divorced...What i don't believe is her being in the right track...But a good story...

Good story with one minor detail: the murder weapon would not have been in the garage for Riley to find - it would have been taken by the police as evidence

It was never said that the Hammer was in the Garage just that. He Tom had a lot of tools and Specialty tools. But I liked the story.

Very good story about the consequences of cheating. The wife's affairs caused one death and two marriages to end. They also caused one man to go to prison. The pain suffered by her husband as well as the pain suffered by the murderer's wife and kids also have to be factored in as well. Why is it that very few cheaters ever consider just how devastating their cheating can be? I rather suspect that if more stories like this one existed, and were read by potential cheaters before they cheated, there would be a lot less cheating going on.

I read at the beginning that you have something like a dozen more "plots" that you can write about.

I beg you, on everything I hold dear, do not write any such stories.

There is ABSOLUTELY nothing worth reading here and since YOU turned scoring OFF maybe YOU should STOP WRITING

classic c1992w. thank you.

While the writing is a bit stilted the sentiment is accurate. One of the best lines out of hundreds of thousands on this site: "'I had been unfaithful to Tom, because I never loved him," - Ex-fucking-actly! They only people who "cheat" are those that do not care for (love) their spouses! That is as clear as day! It is satisfying to read a straight up story on this theme rather than a mind-fuck piece where a wife deeply in love with her husband acts completely out of character and cheats on him and then regrets it. Real life is much easier, a spouse cheats because they don't care about the other spouse or the marriage. Some do change their minds and want to stay married after they get caught, but that is only for the money and the lifestyle. They never love their spouse. Life is short, do not settle for a traitor. Better to be alone.

Put away your notepad of paper and pencil, you are one terrible writer. I've taught fifth graders that could write better than you on your finest day.

But I have read several other of your stories that I thought were good and well written. Keep it up and don't let the nay sayers get you down. Most of them have written nothing anyway and this is a rough crowd in this category!

The author did a very good job on this story. ..as usual.

Congrats to the author and please keep writing more stories like that.

Chur bro awesome story

and prance till shes out the door, TK U MLJ LV NV no stars

Strange story. The premise wasn’t bad but the dialogue was terrible. So damned formal. I don’t think anybody has talked like that since the early nineteenth century. That kinda ruined the story for me.

Thanks for the opportunity to read a good tale of woe and growth. Well developed and great character design.

Thanks

I love how this story came together and the ending! Let the chips fall where they may - from now on I will ONLY speak the truth! 5-Stars - pity there was no voting!

I suppose Tom got.our of his marriage to the cheating bitch, but she got out free too.

The only thing drier than this story.

Thanks

Realistically, the unraveling of a single affair is total chaos. The unraveling of two affairs? Could go just like this one did.

Thanks for writing and sharing.

Liked it. An outcome where the wife got what she deserved without being physically harmed.

Not really very good.

Dialog was bad, the wife was a cock hungry whore using Tom. Really nothing even remotely interesting here.

Pretty mediocre effort

Very ordinary story

3/5

An OK story....but I thought for sure the husband killed the dance partner, and then set up the other lover to take the fall for the murder. That would of been a better ending.

Lisa skank deserved it. She was using Tom to fund her dancing ambitions and that of her bastard partner while fucking George monthly for 5yrs!! Tom was using his retirement policies to fund the skank!!

Ungrateful selfish skank can rot on the farm because she got off easy!!

Toooo many unanswered questions.

An unsatisfied ending. Or should I say no ending at all.

Poorly written.

1 star - English is not your first language and there are so many terms and phrases that an America English speaking person would not use, so this story is very hard to follow. I just lost interest.

Kind of unsatisfying. Not your normal cheating story, so much so that it really isn't that great a story. I'd have given it a 2.