All Comments on 'The Unlikely Quarterback Ch. 13'

loved this series, hope you see fit to create more along this lines, read them all and understandably want more, but will wait on the next installment from you, keep em coming

I appreciate the complement. Unfortunately world creation like this is a lot of work with very little pay off. To give you an idea, the first chapter had less than 21K readers and 742 voters, and chapter 12 has 11K readers (almost half the original readers) and but 671 voters. That means over time I have less and less readership of each chapter.

Then you take a one off story in a different category like Karma Served cold and it has more than 80K readers and 2.4K voters almost quadrupling my readership. Yes I would love to continue to write a series like this but I have so many other works in a pending queue that need to see the light of day that I doubt I'll come back to this any time soon.

This story originally was supposed to be about a boy genius and his adventures from high school through college. He was supposed to be 16 to start with and not be a virgin until he turned 18. However, the moderators didn't even like the suggestion that a minor might have sex even if I noted that he wouldn't be having sex until much later. So I had to revise a lot of this story to accommodate the moderators even though I did not violate the policy of the site in what I wrote. I suppose I could have appealed it but whatever I just moved on and used what I wrote to write a different story.

The funny thing about this story is that it was originally going to have incest in it but I never went there. My editor said it would just ruin the story and I agreed so I kept that out of it even though there are allusions to it possibly happening throughout.

I was considering doing a "What if..." type series, kind of like Marvel comics does where they explore what would happen if something different happened than what happened in that series or what happened in an alternate universe version of the same story. I guess I could do something like that if people out there requested it, but I rarely ever get feedback from anyone other than through comments so I don't see that happening.

Your work is exceptional. Im sorry you dont have the following you want YET! But you will if you keep writing like this. Your characters were exceptional. The plot was good. The meat and bones of this story were organized and well placed. Try for some shorter stories to get your name going. Right now there are several authors here that have moved on to having things published by amazon books. I think with work you can get to that level and beyond. Keep writing and have fun with it. 5

Thoroughly enjoyed this!! Thank you very much.

Thanks for writing a great story, and I eagerly clicked on each new chapter. I’m sorry to read that you received declining readers but I think that happens to a lot of authors on Lit. Sometimes the vote average goes up towards the end of the series because the diehard fans are sticking with it and the more casual ones drop off for one reason or another. If I may make a suggestion for the future, and I hope I don’t sound shallow or weird, but if you included more sex scenes it may help. You have a great ability to allow the reader to conjure up their own images, but you also create wonderful erotic scenes. It might be a pain when one has lived with the characters so long but I know I as a reader really appreciate it. For the moment when characters have their “most important” sexual experience, which is not necessarily the first, I find authors cut it short. But I understand the need to spend more time on the first one. I was thinking of Mike and Candy. But I enjoyed all the sisters, his friends, and stories of his family. I was sad at the loss of Candy when there was so much keeping them apart for most of the story, reading about them together was for me some of the best stuff. Bravo!!

I think you most definitely should do a what if this story was great and had so many directions It could have took, it would be dope💯

Good job.

I have to say though, I HATE bittersweet stories. They hurt. I just can’t stop and have to see how they end.

There were so many twists and events that made me mad. Especially how his relationships were always so messy. It was frustrating and painful. But well done.

Great Story

Enjoyed the plot and character development as the story progresses. Cool to watch a main character recognize the flaws they have, and work to overcome them. Look forward to seeing more of your work soon.

Mostly enjoyed it, but the plot twist were soooo much like a soap opera it was frustrating. His losses throughout were just way to unbearable

I’m pretty sure this took place in Salem, not Long Beach, or at least it mirrors the show my wife watches at 1pm each day. Still, I enjoyed it! Thanks!

FUCKING FANTASTIC! 5 Stars every chapter!

Part of the problem with this protagonist is his superior, sanctimonious and frankly judgemental attitude towards everyone around him was just annoying in the extreme.

It got to the point where everytime something didn't work out because literally everything and everyone shat all over him you actually enjoyed his pain and suffering.

I really liked this story. l started it this morning and just couldn’t put it down. It was such a great ride. Scores 5/5 and into my favourites, it will be read again.

I recommend this tale to all comers

Good story, very much enjoyed it. The protagonist was OTT in his strengths, but who wants to read about normal people? He also had weaknesses and personality flaws. I also like that he was injured during fights, showing that even extreme martial arts skills do not make you invincible. The twist with the drug cartels felt forced and a little rushed at the end.

Excellent story, I was totally engaged through every episode.

Loved it all. Thanks.

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ End seemed light to me.

But it was frustrating in many parts of it.

All of his friends seemed to be only fairweather friends, especially the women and their interest seems to only be there when they wanted something from Mike.

If I were Mike I think at several different points in the story when his supposed female "friends" were dumping on him I would have simply grabbed Sister Stephanie and took off for parts unknown and made lots of babies and fuck everyone else.

For all the different characters in this story not very many of them were actually likeable.

I was really enjoying the stories but you lost it with this last one killing of candy then the nonsense with Laura it just got ridiculous

Mike is a simp.

Liked the story. Will bookmark for a reread in the future.