tagMind ControlThe Waiting

The Waiting


"The waiting is the hardest part,
Every day you get one more yard,
You take it on faith, you take it to the heart,
The waiting is the hardest part."

--Tom Petty

Kevin spent the night dreaming about Eleanor again. She was a constant presence in his sleeping mind, now; his waking fantasies of her shaded so gradually into erotic dreams that he sometimes didn't even realize he'd fallen asleep. Tonight, he dreamed that he woke from a dream of her to find her actually there in the bed with him. Her pale green eyes stared at him with the look of devotion he'd always imagined she would have when the process was complete, and her soft smile told him that she was his at last. She kissed her way down his chest, her auburn hair spilling out to brush his arms and hands as she pressed her lips against him over and over again.

"I love you," she whispered between each kiss, her hands stroking and petting around his cock but never quite seeming to touch. "I want you so badly, Kevin. Anything you want, anything you desire, I..." Her voice shuddered with need, and Kevin knew that she was consumed with pleasure simply by pleasing him. "I am yours. Please, please command me, please..."

Her hot breath tingled against his cock as she begged, his erection sticking straight up as she worshiped his dick with her eyes. "May I please touch it?" she whimpered, staring greedily at his cock. There was something so deliciously lost about the expression on her face, as though she only had one certainty in the world, and it was her new Master. "Please?"

The moment of anticipation seemed to stretch out into an eternity, the power as thrilling as the sight of Eleanor's naked body. He'd pictured her nude for so long, wanting to see every inch of her body, and now it was real. She was kneeling on the bed, her heavy, full breasts swaying slightly as she panted with arousal. She was just exactly as beautiful naked as he'd imagined. "Yes, my sweet," he said, his voice gentle but firm. "I want to fuck your tits." The look of joy on her face when he said it would linger with him all day long.

The buzz of his alarm clock woke him just as she enfolded her breasts around his cock, and Kevin woke with an angry, throbbing erection and a lingering phantom sensation of skin as smooth as silk. At first, his only thought was of aching loss as he realized the dream wasn't real after all. Then he remembered, as the waking world poured back in. The process was underway. Eleanor wasn't his yet, but it was only a matter of time.

He threw off the covers, exposing his body to the cool morning air. His cock stuck straight up, and he stared at it for a long moment as he tried to decide whether to finish what the dream had started, or let his erection subside on its own. Normally, he tried to wait at least until lunch before jacking off, but his cock didn't seem to want to soften this morning. He felt like Eleanor's delicate fingers were still wrapped around it, and every thought of her made it twitch all over again. Finally, with an effort of willpower, he got up and headed to the shower.

The lukewarm water finally did the trick, but Kevin knew he'd be revisiting that dream tonight. He almost felt like making a list, some days, of things he wanted to do once Eleanor was finally under his complete control. He knew it would start with those tits of hers; he always tried not to stare when he was around her, but the way those wonderful, huge breasts of hers strained against even the baggiest and most conservative outfits, it was hard not to. Once she belonged to him, he would stare at them as long as he wanted. Maybe he'd make her play with them, stroking and fondling and rubbing her own breasts while he watched her moan and whimper in pleasure, until she begged to be allowed to move her hands down to her pussy and masturbate...

With an irritated grunt, Kevin noticed his cock had gotten hard again. He was going to be late for work if he didn't get it together. Not that anyone minded if he was late--one of the advantages of being in the Special Projects Division, he could pretty much set his own hours. But getting in on time meant that he usually bumped into Eleanor in the cafeteria before she started work. That was inducement enough to get him moving.

He dressed quickly, trying to find some way to calm his over-enthusiastic libido before he got in to work. He didn't want to be sporting a boner when he had his morning chat with Eleanor. He tried to think of some of his non-sexual fantasies about her--trips to restaurants, late-night movie festivals, getting her to teach him how to cook and teaching her how to play go, taking that trip to Australia that she'd always wanted to do but had never had the money...somewhere around the time he pictured them admiring the Sydney Opera House, he finally managed to put clothes on his mental image of her. That helped a lot.

On the drive in to work, he wondered if he was becoming obsessed. He almost chuckled at the thought; some people might say he became obsessed the moment he decided to spike her drink with thousands of nanoscopic machines at the office Christmas party. But that was why he didn't talk about the process to anyone. Nobody would understand. They'd probably just think he was some sort of sociopath. They just didn't understand the depths of his love for Eleanor.

But Kevin understood perfectly well. That was why he had gotten a little obsessed, lately--it was just the anticipation, he told himself. Having to be near her every single day, knowing that she was growing closer and closer to that dawning realization that she loved Kevin as much as he loved her...it was just hard to be patient, that was all. Anyone would get excited.

He pulled into the parking lot, keeping an eye out for Eleanor's car as he did so, and checked the time. Eight fifty-two. Plenty of time to chat with Eleanor before she had to get to work, and he'd definitely seen her car in the lot. Kevin walked into the office with a spring in his step and a smile on his face.

She was just stirring cream into her coffee cup, chatting with Darcy from Marketing, but she smiled as soon as she saw him walk into the room. That was progress in and of itself--Kevin remembered a time when he was practically invisible to her. "Hey, Kevin!" she said, smiling. "I brought back your book, but I'm afraid I left it in my purse. You'll have to stop by my desk later and pick it up."

"Um, sure, no problem," he said, totally unable to get the doofy grin off his face. He hadn't wanted to change too much about Eleanor, but it had been hard not to resist the temptation to upgrade her tastes in literature just a little bit. Finding out that she'd breezed through 'Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?' was just one more little confirmation that the process was working as intended, every bit as thrilling by itself as the knowledge that she'd enjoyed the book. "I'll stop by after lunch."

He intended to say more, but he was still a little tongue-tied around Eleanor. He always found himself being too cautious; he could check the physical changes in her brain, but he was never sure exactly how that mapped to her thoughts on a moment-to-moment basis. Did she know anything was different? Did she wonder why she looked at Kevin every day with a little more tenderness, or did the process seem natural and imperceptible to her? Most importantly, did she love him yet?

He didn't know, despite all the computer simulations. So he held back. He couldn't take rejection, not from her. Not even if he knew that someday, once the process had taken hold completely, she would beg him for forgiveness for the slight. He needed to be sure before he could say anything. Until that day, he would just take comfort in every word they exchanged. He could wait, he told himself again. Eleanor was worth waiting for.

"Looking forward to it," she said with a smile that practically made his cock spring up all over again. "So anyway, Darcy, they actually tried to tell me that the check was in the mail. Can you believe it? I half expected to hear them tell me that of course they'd respect me in the morning! So I said..." Kevin just listened to the rest of the conversation, hanging on Eleanor's every word until it was time for her to head off to work.

After they'd left, Kevin fixed himself a cup of coffee and headed up to his office and logged onto his computer. Not for the first time, he counted his blessings that he worked in Special Projects--being one of Central Dynamics' pet geniuses meant that he could get away with little eccentricities like locking his office door, or having encrypted files on his work computer without having Network Support complain to his boss. When the company made 8.9 billion dollars every time you had a good idea, they tended to indulge you a little in between brainstorms.

He opened up the file simply labeled, "Monitor Application". As usual, a graphic of Eleanor's brain popped up on the screen, gently rotating through three dimensions as he watched. The nanites had insinuated themselves into every single cell of her cerebral cortex since that first night he'd introduced them to her system, replicating and infiltrating until they had perfectly integrated themselves with her neural network. The image he was looking at right now was a perfect model of her actual brain, rendered in real time through signals received from the nanite swarm inside her skull.

He brought up the saved image of her original brain pattern, overlaying it onto the one the nanites were sending. Even with the wealth of information he'd gotten from having a perfect map of her brain, he'd had to design an entire new computer from scratch just to comprehend that data. Mapping the neural network in Eleanor's head to her emotions, her ideals, her personality...Kevin remembered the sensation of sheer erotic triumph, the day that he'd finally compiled a program that could work out exactly how to change the physical structure of her brain to effect the changes he wanted.

And it was working. He could see it, right there on the screen. He could see the way the nanites gently, carefully shifted Eleanor's synaptic connections those key billionths of an inch, altering their patterns without damaging the cells. He could see the changes, mapped onto each other, the alterations a tangible sign of her growing devotion to him. And one day...

Kevin brought up the projected graphic of the finished project with one hand, while reaching into the desk for a bottle of lube with the other. He'd meant to wait until lunch, he really had, but the thought of Eleanor as she would become, just as smart and funny and inquisitive, but also loving and submissive and eager to please...it went straight from his mind down to his cock and he just couldn't wait any longer. He unzipped his fly and pulled his already-hard cock out of his pants.

His cock felt hot and swollen under his fingers as he worked the lube up and down the shaft. His eyes were on the graphic, but in his mind, it was Eleanor in black lingerie, Eleanor whispering dirty talk into his ear as she took his cock into her pussy, Eleanor grunting in pleasure as he fucked her ass. It was the perfected Eleanor, everything she already was combined with everything he wanted her to be, and she was so hot and so sexy and she was his, all his.

He felt the cum boiling in his balls, aching with need ever since the dream. He let his eyes roll back in his head and remembered it all over again, her silky skin wrapping around his cock as she said, "Thank you, Master, thank you for fucking my tits, oh, please cum, please cum on my face Master, please oh please oh please..." He imagined her words melting into a babble of need and lust, interrupted by slurping noises every time his cock slid up through the valley of her breasts and she couldn't help herself and had to lick it and suck it...

"Good girl," he whispered, shooting his load into his hand.

Afterwards, he took a moment to clean himself up before closing the application and finally unlocking the door. It wasn't that he was ashamed of himself. He loved Eleanor, truly and deeply. He could never do anything to hurt her. He just knew that nobody would understand.

The orgasm took a bit of the edge off, and Kevin was able to concentrate a bit better after that. He spent most of the rest of the morning fiddling with some ideas he'd been working on for telepresence--he could easily justify his R&D budget for the next decade just by bringing the nanites to his bosses, but Kevin wasn't quite comfortable enough with the ethical underpinnings of the company he worked for to hand them the keys to the human brain. Right now, he wanted it to stay in the hands of someone sensible and decent, like him.

The telepresence work kept Kevin occupied for the most part, but he still found himself occasionally distracted by fantasies of her. He'd be playing with the design programs, and suddenly he'd notice that the screensaver had come on because he was picturing her 'surprising' him by shaving her pussy for him. He almost wanted to masturbate again, but he'd sworn to limit himself to once a day. Well, definitely no more than once a day in the office.

He took a long lunch, heading out to the local mall to browse for a new book to 'lend' Eleanor. Once she moved in, of course, she'd be pleasantly surprised to find all her favorites waiting on her own bookcase in the study, but for now she thought they were just borrowed. One thing he was glad he hadn't needed to change was the speed at which she read. He'd been waiting a lifetime to find someone who went through books as quickly as he did. He walked out of the store with a copy of 'Dune' for her and a new Terry Pratchett book for himself, which he polished off while eating pizza in the food court. (One thing he knew, he'd be eating healthier once they were a couple. It was only fair to improve himself for her the way he was improving her for him.)

After lunch, he drove back to the office and wandered up to the Accounts Receivable department, trying to act casual, like he was just on his way back to his desk. Which would involve a serious rethinking of Euclidean topology, admittedly, but he didn't want anyone realizing he had a crush on Eleanor. They might tell her, and then she might...Kevin sighed. He didn't know what Eleanor would do, not yet at least. And he was afraid to find out.

Thankfully, Eleanor was alone at her desk. It meant he could stay a little longer. Yesterday, Darcy had been there, and he'd just handed her the book and walked away with little more than a mumbled, "Hope you like it." Today, he could talk to her a little.

"Hey," he said. "Just stopped by for a little book trading." He smiled nervously. Stupid, he thought to himself. Stupid stupid joke, she won't laugh...

She didn't, but she smiled at him with genuine warmth. "Sounds good. Here's the Dick book..." Was it just his imagination, or did her eyes flicker downwards when she said 'dick'? Was that subliminal? Were her thought patterns altered enough that she was interested in him sexually? Was she going to say something more?

He suddenly realized he'd just been standing there for about fifteen seconds, and he reached up and took the book from her outstretched hand. "Sorry," he said. "Lost in thought."

"Well, you've got a lot of them," she said cheerfully. "I'd imagine it gets kind of hard to find your way out." Was that a compliment? It sounded like one...Kevin's smile relaxed a little. "So, anyway, you said something about a trade. Does this mean you've got something new for me today?"

Kevin nodded quickly. "Um, yeah. 'Dune', by Frank Herbert. It's this kind of political intrigue book, set in the future on this planet that's all desert." He shrugged apologetically. "It's kind of geeky, I know, but..."

"No, it's okay," Eleanor said, taking the book. "I'm kind of enjoying geeky. It's a nice change from Oprah's list, you know?" She flipped through it briefly. "This is a little thicker than the last one you gave me. Might take me a couple of days. I hope you don't mind."

"No, no!" Kevin said hurriedly. "Take your time. This one's a little more challenging, lots of scope. It's fine if you don't get it back tomorrow." Privately, he was already sketching a graph in his head, equating the mental shift with the degree of enthusiasm for science-fiction and wondering if he could turn it into an equation. Then he realized he was just standing there again. "So, um, anyway...yeah. Hope you like it."

"I'm sure I will," Eleanor said. She leaned over and gave him a peck on the cheek before sitting back down and digging into her work. "Have a good afternoon!"

Kevin had to quickly detour into the bathroom for a few minutes before his erection went down and he could walk back to his own office without feeling self-conscious.

Thinking about that tiny kiss absolutely ruined him for the rest of the day. He packed up around three o'clock, giving up on any hope of productivity, and headed back home. Thankfully, he could always count on Worlds of Warcraft to distract him. Fantasies came and went, but the Lich King was eternal.

By nine o'clock, though, Kevin was ready for bed. He said good night to his guild, signed off of voice chat, and headed upstairs. By the time he got to his room, his cock was already stiff again in his pants, thinking about a Christmas morning where Eleanor unwrapped a glass dildo as a present, then gave her gift to him by demonstrating it for him. He crawled between the sheets and lubed himself up, imagining the look of lust in her eyes as he slid his cock between her tits while she fucked herself with it. He felt the familiar tightness in his balls, and as he shot his load, he pictured it splattering onto her face. He hadn't bothered with porn for a while, now. Thoughts of sweet, sexy, submissive Eleanor were all he needed to get off now.

He could imagine what it would be like, if he told someone. They'd think he just wanted a plaything, a toy, a sex slave. They didn't understand that he loved Eleanor, that he only did this because he wanted to spend his whole life with her. They wouldn't see the devotion it took, the patience it required to make her his. But Eleanor was special. She was worth waiting for.

Maybe they'd understand, if he showed them the program. Maybe if they saw for themselves the way that the nanites were altering her brain so delicately, so carefully to avoid damaging even a single perfect cell of the woman he loved, then they'd realize just how much he loved her. After all, nobody would wait ten years just to have a sex slave.

Kevin drifted to sleep, already beginning to dream of Eleanor once more.


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