All Comments on 'The Will of the Gods Ch. 02'

And can you make it about them married and have a daughter

You have a very good story going on here that has a potential to be really great. The characters and their motivations seems well developed so far though I still think, you should develop more on the very base nature of the Main characters i.e., Nerata'ari and Sekhmet. While the names and such seem very Egyptian, I just feel that the dialogue is a bit too slang from the start to feel God-ish. Perhaps in the future chapters when they are a bit more well-acquainted with each other, they can be that casual but from what I see, the tone of the Goddess should have been a little bit more formal no matter the relationship or the emotions. The Goddess' response feels a bit too crass and it diverts a little attention making us lose little focus. While not much these little bits add up surprisingly fast. Otherwise, you have a generally good structure save for some unavoidable typos! Do keep up the awesome work and hope to see more content from you.

J. Jamie Dupane

You have a wonderful start on this story and I really look forward to seeing it unfold. Keep up the good work and well done.

Thank you for all your support! Sorry you found some typos, I try hard to edit them out, but a few always manage to slip through the cracks. As for their future... I can't give out any spoilers ;)